THE season might be milder--it could hardly be more malevolent. But here
is mildness:--
A WIDOWER of middle age, of quiet and regular habits, who has
three children at boarding school, desires a HOME in the house
of an independent Christian widow or single lady, whose object
in letting apartments is chiefly society, who would accept
merely nominal terms, and where he would be the only lodger.
Nice house and servant desirable.--Address, with every
particular, &c., &c.
What a charming person must this advertiser be, if we may judge from the
high value which he sets on his society! No doubt he has been deluged
with replies to his advertisement. What independent lady could possibly
decline to offer him the home which he so modestly demands, and to
sacrifice her independence by accepting him as lodger, first, and
finally as lord, as soon as he inclined to offer her his heart? "Beware
of widows, _Sammy!_" said the elder _Mr. Weller_. Beware of widowers,
ladies! adds the wiser _Mr. Punch_.
* * * * *
=The Weather and the Paths.=
Foul weather! Come on, my Macintosh
And my Boots; we'll never mind it,
While the rain the face of the Earth doth wash,
Though the dirtier still we find it.
* * * * *
=Freshwomen of the Future.=
IT is proposed to transfer the Ladies' College to Cambridge. This
addition, if made, to Alma Mater will, in case of future controversy
between disorderly undergraduates and other inhabitants, be obviously an
advantage over Town in favour of Gown. For even the Graduates and Dons
of the gentler sex will all be Gownswomen.
Transcriber Notes:
Passages in italics were indicated by _underscores_.
Passages in bold were indicated by =equal signs=.
Small caps were replaced with ALL CAPS.
Throughout the document, the oe ligature was replaced with "oe".
Throughout the dialogues, there were words used to mimic accents of the
speakers. Those words were retained as-is.
Errors in punctuations and inconsistent hyphenation were not corrected
unless otherwise noted. For instance, a quotation mark is missing in the
first main paragraph of "Evenings From Home," and the formatting and
spelling of the table under "State of the Weather in Naples from the 6th
to the 12th Jan. 1872" is kept as-is.
Illustrations with a single letter in their caption were sometimes used
in the original pages to serve as initial capital letters.
On page 51, last part of the poem "The 'Phantom Board'." was moved to
page 48 so that the full page illustration "The 'Phantom Board'." would
not divide the poem.