LONDON, _December 10_.
Tell me, in the name of God, “if you are of God,” _querida Mariquita_,
why you have not answered my letter. Your letter before the last, and
especially the picture which accompanied it, threw me into such a
flutter that the note I wrote you on the spot did not have any too much
common sense. Now that I am calmer, and have had several days in London
to refresh my mind, I shall try to reason with you.
Why do you not wish to see me? No one of your friends knows me, and my
visit would seem entirely natural. Your principal motive seems to be the
dread of doing something _improper_, as they say here. I do not take
seriously what you say concerning your fear of losing your illusions
upon closer acquaintance with me. If this were the real ground of your
hesitation, you would be the first woman, the first human being, whom
such a consideration prevented from gratifying her inclination or her
curiosity.
Let us consider the impropriety of it. Is the thing improper in itself?
No, for nothing is more open and above-board. You know in advance that I
shall not eat you. The thing, then, is improper, admitting that it is
improper, only in the eyes of society. Observe in passing that this word
_society_ makes us miserable from the day when we put on clothes that
are uncomfortable, because society so orders it, until the day of our
death....
In sending me your portrait, it seems to me that you gave me a proof of
your faith in my discretion. Why, then, believe in it no longer? A man’s
good judgment, and mine in particular, is the greater the more is
expected of him. This granted, and being fully convinced of my
discretion, you may see me, and society will be none the wiser,
consequently it can not exclaim at the impropriety. I will even add,
with my hand on my heart--that is, on my left side--that so far as I am
concerned I see not the slightest impropriety in it. I will say more: if
this correspondence is to continue without our ever meeting, it becomes
the most absurd thing in the world. All these thoughts I leave to your
reflection.
If I were vainer, I should rejoice at what you say of my diamond. But we
can never fall in love--with each other, I mean. Our acquaintance did
not begin in a manner to lead to that point: it is far too romantic for
that. As for the diamond, my travelling companion, while smoking his
cigar, spoke of it without knowing my interest in the matter, and said
some very deplorable things. He seems to have no doubt of its falseness.
Dear _Mariquita_, you say you would never wish to be a “crown diamond,”
and you are quite right. You are worth more than that. I offer you a
sincere friendship, which, I hope, may some day be of value to us both.
Good-bye.