COUNTESS THEUDELINDE
The mistress of Bondavara was at this time fifty-eight years old. Ivan
had not overstated her age when he gave Felix the information.
Countess Theudelinde had long since given up the world. The
renunciation cost her very little; she had never been in touch with
it. Up to her fourteenth year she had grown up in the house of her
father, the prince; at that period her mother, the princess, died. The
governess of Theudelinde was beautiful, the prince was old. The
countess--only the first-born can have the princely title; the younger
children are all counts and countesses--could not, for various
reasons, remain under the paternal roof; she was sent out of the way
and to finish her education at a convent. Before she went, however,
she was betrothed to the Marquis Don Antonio de Padua, only son of the
Marquis de Colomorano, then eighteen years of age. It was settled
between the two fathers that when Antonio was twenty-four and
Theudelinde twenty, she should be fetched out of her convent, and both
should be united in wedlock by Holy Church. This arrangement was
carried out so far as Theudelinde spending six blameless years in a
most highly respectable convent. She was then brought home, and the
marriage bells were set ringing. But, horror of horrors, when the girl
saw her betrothed husband, she shrieked and ran away! This was not
the man she had promised to marry; this one had a mustache!
(Naturally, for he was an officer in the hussars.)
Theudelinde had never seen a man with a mustache. Six years before,
when she was at home, all the distinguished guests who came to her
father's house, the magnates, the ambassadors, were all smooth-shaved,
so were the man-servants, even the coachman. In the convent there was
only one man, the father confessor; his face was like a glass. And now
they proposed to marry her to a man all hair! Impossible! The saints
and the prophets of old wore beards, that was true; some of them had a
good deal of hair, but none had it only on the upper-lip. The only one
she could remember with this adornment was the servant of the
high-priest in the Stations of the Cross, which, to a pious mind like
Theudelinde's, was conclusive. She would hear no more of the marriage;
the betrothal rings were returned on both sides, and the alliance was
at an end.
After this the countess avoided all worldly amusements. Nothing would
induce her go to a ball, or to the theatre. Nevertheless, she did not
seem inclined to take the veil; she had strong leanings towards this
wicked world, only she wanted one of a different sort, without the
wickedness. She desired out of the general chaos to create an ideal,
and this ideal should be her husband. He should be tender, faithful,
no wine-drinker, no smoker; a man with a smooth face, a pure soul, a
sweet-sounding voice; a gifted, sympathetic, patient, amiable, soft,
romantic, domestic, pious man; prudent, scientific, literary,
distinguished, well-born, much respected, covered with orders, rich,
loyal, brave, and titled. Such a _rara avis_ was impossible to find.
Countess Theudelinde spent the best days of her life seeking a
portrait to fit the frame she had made, but she sought in vain; there
was no husband for her.
When the countess had reached thirty there was a halt. The ideal was
as far off as ever. She was anxious to come to terms with the world,
but the world would have none of her. Her day was past; she had no
right to any pretensions. She found herself in the position of having
to choose between utter renunciation or acceptance of the world, with
all its wickedness. At this critical juncture the old prince, her
father, died, leaving the countess the property of Bondavara, together
with the castle. Here Theudelinde retired to nurse her ideal, and
mourn over her shattered idols. Here she was absolute mistress, her
brother, to whom the property reverted, leaving her to her own
devices.
The countess carried out, therefore, her theories unmolested, and her
dislike to beards and mustaches had free play. The growers of these
enormities were banished from her presence, and, as was only a natural
consequence, as time went on her hatred of the male sex increased. No
man was allowed in the neighborhood of the countess. She only suffered
women about her--not alone in the house, but outside. The garden, the
conservatories, were attended to by women--unmarried women, all.
Matrimony was as a red rag to Theudelinde, and no one durst mention
the word in her presence. Any girl who showed any inclination to wear
the "matron's cap" was at once dismissed with contumely. Even the
"coachman" was a woman; and for the reason that it would not have been
fitting to sit upon a coach-box in woman's clothes, this female Jehu
was allowed to wear a long coachman's cloak, a man's coat, as also a
certain garment, at the bare mention of which an Englishwoman calls
out, "Oh, how shocking!" and straightway faints. Truly, at the time
this history was written, in our good land of Hungary, this very
garment played a serious part, since it was the shibboleth and visible
sign of fidelity to the governing powers, and of submission to the
mediators; in truth, ever since those days the "leg of the boot" has
been worn. So it came to pass that Mrs. Liese wore this thing, the
only one of the kind to be seen in the castle. Liese, also, was
allowed to drink wine, and to smoke tobacco, and, needless to say, she
did both.
Fraulein Emerenzia, the countess's companion, was, so to speak, the
exact counterpart of her noble mistress. The countess was tall and
slender; she had a white skin, her features were sharp, her nose
almost transparent, her lips, scarlet in color, were shaped like a
bow; her cadaverous form bent forward; her eyelids fell over her
lack-lustre eyes, her face appeared to have two sides which didn't
belong to one another, each half having a totally different
expression; even the wrinkles didn't correspond. She wore her hair as
it was worn in the days of her youth, as it was worn when Caroline Pia
was married, and as it is possible it will be worn again. Her hands
were fine, transparent; they were not strong enough to cut the leaves
of a book with a paper-knife. Her whole being was nerveless and
sensitive. At the slightest noise she would shriek, be seized with a
cramp, or go off in hysterics. She had certain antipathies to beasts,
flowers, air, food, motion, and emotion. At the sight of a cat she was
ready to faint; if she saw a flesh-colored flower her blood grew
excited. Silver gave everything an unpleasant taste, so her spoons
were all of gold. If any women crossed their legs she sent them out of
the room. If the spoons, knives, or forks were by accident laid
crosswise on the table, she would not sit down; and if she were to
see velvet on any of her attendants she was thrown into a nervous
attack, from the bare idea that perhaps her hand might come in contact
with this electric and antipathetic substance.
Fortunately for her household her nervous fears kept her quiet at
night. She locked and double-locked the door of her room, and never
opened it until the morning came--no, not if the house were burning
over her head.
Fraulein Emerenzia was, as we have before said, the counterpart of her
mistress, in so far that she affected a close imitation of her ways,
for in her appearance she was a direct contrast, Emerenzia being a
round, short, fat woman, with a full face, the skin of which was so
tightly stretched that it was almost as white as the countess's; she
had a snub nose, which in secret was addicted to the vice of
snuff-taking. Her dress and her manner of doing her hair were
identical with the countess's fashion in each, only that the stiff-set
clothes had on her small body a humorous expression. She affected to
be as nerveless as the countess; her hands were as weak--they could
not break a chicken bone. Her eyes were as sensitive to light, her
antipathies were as numerous, and she was as prone to faints and
hysterics as her patroness. In this direction, indeed, she went
further. So soon as she observed that there was any cause for
emotional display, she set up trembling and screaming, and so got the
start of the countess, and generally managed to sob for a minute
longer; and when Theudelinde fell fainting upon one sofa Emerenzia
dropped lifeless upon another; likewise, she took longer coming to
than did her mistress. At night Emerenzia slept profoundly. Her room
was only separated from that of the countess by an ante-chamber, but
Theudelinde might tear down all the bells in the castle without waking
her companion, who maintained that her sleep was a species of nervous
trance.
One man only was ever allowed entrance into the Castle of Bondavara.
What do we say?--no man, no _masculinum_. The language of dogma has
defined that the priest is _neutrius generis_, is more and less than a
being of the male sex; bodily he can be no man's father, spiritually
he is father of thousands. No one need think he will here read any
calumnies against the priesthood. The pastor Mahok was a brave, honest
man; he said mass devoutly, baptized, married, buried when called
upon, would get up in the middle of the night to attend the death-bed
of a parishioner, and would never grumble at the sacristan for waking
him out of his first sleep. The pastor wrote no articles in the
_Church News_, neither did he ever read one. If he wanted a newspaper
he borrowed from the steward the daily paper. When his clerk collected
Peter's pence, Pastor Mahok sent it with an additional gulden or two
to the office of the chief priest; but this did not prevent him
sitting down in the evening to play "tarok" with the Lutheran pastor
and the infidel steward. He held to having a good cellar; he had a
whole family of bees in his garden, and was a successful cultivator of
fruit. In politics he was a loyalist, and confessed he belonged to the
middle party, which in the country means just this, and no more, "We
vote for the tobacco monopoly, but we smoke virgin tobacco because it
is good and we have it."
From this account every one will understand that during the course of
this narrative this excellent gentleman will offend no one. We would,
in fact, have nothing to say to him were it not that he came every
day, punctually at eleven o'clock, to Bondavara Castle to hear the
countess's confession, and that done, he remained to dinner, and in
both directions he honestly earned his small honorarium. There was a
general air of satisfaction in his whole appearance, in his double
chin, in his fresh color, in his round, shining face.
To-day the excellent man was punctual. The countess, however, was not.
Just as eleven o'clock struck, the spiritual man knocked at the door
of the sitting-room. Only the voice of Emerenzia answered, "Come in!"
The smile of greeting on the countenance of the visitor was reflected
on that of the companion. It was the meeting of two full moons.
"The countess is still locked in her room," Emerenzia said in a
whisper, as if afraid that her voice could penetrate into the third
room.
The pastor expressed by a movement of his hand and an elevation of his
eyebrows that the sleep of the just was not to be disturbed. The good
man was not aware that it was the toilette of the just that was then
in progress. These mysteries were conducted by the countess in
private. No one, not even a faithful maid, was admitted until
Theudelinde was clothed, and for this reason her garments were made to
close in front.
The priest made use of this unexpected delay to search in the pocket
of his coat, and to draw from thence a mysterious something, which,
after first casting a look round the room, to make sure no one was
spying on him, he pressed into the fat hand of the countess's
companion, who hastily concealed this surreptitious something in the
depths of the pocket of her dress, expressing her gratitude by a
friendly nod, which the pastor returned by a courteous movement
which expressed, "No thanks are necessary for so small a service."
Whereupon Emerenzia, turning away, half-shyly drew the something
carefully out of her pocket, peered into the contents of the same,
held it close to her nose, drinking in the scent of the something,
turning her eyes up to heaven, and again to the pastor, who, on his
part, expressed by the motion of the thumb and forefinger of his
left hand, "Excellent--special brand!" Then, no longer able to
restrain her feelings, the companion took from the mysterious packet
between the thumb and forefinger of _her_ right hand something which
she placed in both nostrils, and sniffed up in silent ecstasy. It
was the pastor's pleasure to fill Emerenzia's snuff-box with the
very best mixture. This was the platonic bond which existed between
them--the mutual desire of two noses for one ideal.
Yellow snuff is not an unattainable ideal. In the ordinary way of
business a quarter of a pound can be procured for a few pence; but
common snuff was as different from the priest's mixture as cherry
brandy is from Chartreuse, or Veuve Cliquot from the vintage of
Presburg. This is easily understood by those who take snuff. How is it
that a clergyman always has the best tobacco? How does he prepare it?
Does he get it prepared? These are broad questions that a man of
liberal mind dare not ventilate. Even if he knew, it would not be
advisable to make use of his knowledge. One thing is certain, the best
tobacco is used by the Church. A bishop, who died not long since, left
behind him a hundredweight of the most heavenly stuff, two ounces of
which fetched a ducat.
The quiet _tête-à-tête_ between the two snuff-takers was disturbed by
the sound of a bell; then a metal slide in the door of the countess's
room opened, and a tray with an empty teacup was put through. This was
a sign that the countess had breakfasted.
Every door in the castle had sliding panels, some large, others
small. The slides were made of copper, the doors of strong wood,
with brass locks and fasteners. The door of the countess's bedroom
was all of iron, covered on the inside with a tapestry curtain.
Since no man was allowed in the house, it was necessary to have a
defence system against any possible attack. This system included
some cleverly-constructed machinery, by means of which the countess,
by pressing her foot, could raise up the flooring, and precipitate
any bold invader of the sacred precincts of her bedroom into a
cellar without light or exit. From the alcove of her bed an electric
telegraph connected with the fire-tower, so that by raising her
finger the alarm-bell could be set ringing, and in case of danger
the masculine inhabitants of the adjacent farm-houses and
hunting-lodges could be summoned without a moment's delay. In
Emerenzia's room there was likewise a communication with this
electric apparatus, and to the door were affixed the different signs
by which the countess expressed her wishes. The cup signified that
the waiting-maid was required, a book would have meant that the
companion was needed.
Emerenzia, therefore, sent the girl to her mistress. When her work was
finished the bell rang again, the book appeared, and the companion
went to the countess. After a short time she returned, and opened the
door for the pastor, while she whispered to him softly--
"She has seen the spirits again; she has much to tell you."
We will follow the pastor into his penitent's room; but no one need be
afraid that he or she is about to listen to the lady's confession.
When the pastor had closed the door behind him, he came to the
countess, who sat in a large armchair, looking pale and exhausted.
She signed to the priest to take his place in another armchair
opposite to her.
"Have you seen them again?" he asked.
"I have," said the countess, in an awed whisper. "All happened in the
same way as usual. So soon as the clock-tower had sounded midnight,
there rose from below, as if out of the vault, a fearful chorus of
voices intoning the _De Profundis_. It was a ghostly, terrible sound.
I could distinguish the solo of the celebrant, the antiphon, the
chorus; and between them loud laughter, diabolical words, the shrieks
of women, and the clatter of glasses. I heard comic songs accompanied
by wild howls; then, again, the soft, pious hymn succeeded by the wild
disorder. I pinched my arm to see did I dream. Here you can see the
mark. 'Twas not dreaming. I got up; I wished to convince myself that I
was awake. I took my pencil and note-paper, and when a distinct tune
reached my ear I wrote it down. Here is the paper. You understand
music."
The priest threw a hasty glance over the ghostly melody, and
recognized a well-known Hungarian volkslied--"Maiden with the black
eyes, let me taste thy lips." Undoubtedly an unclean song to issue
from the family vault at midnight!
"And, gracious countess, have you never heard the peasants singing
this in the fields?"
The countess drew herself up with dignity. "Do I frequent the places
where peasants sing?" she made answer; and then continued her story.
"These notes are sufficient proof that I was awake; my nerves were too
excited to allow me to sleep again. Moreover, I was drawn by an
invincible desire to go to the spot from whence the sound came. I
dressed myself. I am certain that I took out my grass-green skirt of
Gros de Naples, with a flounce of cashmere. I called none of my
servants; every one in the house was asleep. An extraordinary courage
awoke in me. Quite alone I descended the steps which lead to the
family vault. When I reached the door both sides opened of themselves;
I entered, and found myself in the presence of my departed ancestors.
The monuments were all removed, the niches empty; the occupiers of
both sat round the long table which stands in the vault, in the
identical dress in which they are painted in the portraits which hang
in the hall, and by which their calling in life is distinguishable. My
great-uncle, the archbishop, in full canonicals, celebrated mass
before the requiem altar; my grandfather, the chancellor, had large
parchment documents before him, upon which he affixed the state seal.
My great-uncle, the field-marshal, in armor, and with the marshal's
baton in his hand, gave orders. My ancestress Katherine, who was a
lady of the court, and of remarkable beauty, rolled her eyes about,
and in her whole face no feature moved but those glittering eyes; and
my aunt Clementina, the abbess of the Ursuline Convent, sang psalms
with my uncle, in which the others from time to time joined."
"But the laughter, the tumult, the comic songs?" asked the pastor.
"I am coming to that. At the other end of the table sat some of my
more distant relatives--my young cousin Clarissa, who danced herself
to death; and a cousin, who was a celebrated flute player; and my
great-uncle Otto, who was devoted to hazard, and now rattled dice into
a copper goblet, and cursed his bad-luck when he made a bad throw;
also another cousin, who died on the very night of her marriage, and
still wore a faded wedding wreath; finally, my uncle Ladislaus, who
was banished from the family circle early in the century, and whose
frame hangs in the picture-gallery empty, his portrait being removed."
"How did you know him, then?" By this question the pastor hoped to
check the flow of the countess's visions.
Theudelinde, however, answered that her uncle Ladislaus, being a rebel
and a heretic, had not alone been declared a traitor, but had incurred
the ban of excommunication. He was taken prisoner and beheaded. "And
therefore," she added, with an air of conviction, "it was easy to
recognize him by his death's-head. Likewise, during his lifetime he
ignored the king's express command, and was the first to introduce
tobacco-smoke into the country, and on this account, at his execution,
he received the punishment awarded to the smoker, of having a
pipe-handle run through his nose. Last night, as he sat at the table,
he held between the teeth of his monstrous death's-head a large
meerschaum pipe, and the whole vault smelled in the most fearful
manner of tobacco-smoke."
This remark convinced the priest that the countess had been dreaming.
"Between both my cousins," she went on, "the nun and the bride, there
was an empty chair. There I felt obliged to seat myself. The bride
wished to hear of the fashions; she praised the stuff of my Gros de
Naples dress, taking it between her fingers, which, when they touched
mine, were cold as death itself. The upper end of the table was
covered with green cloth, the lower end with a yellow silk
table-cloth, embroidered with many-colored flowers. At this end every
one laughed, talked, sang noisy songs; while at the top the psalms
were intoned and the antiphon was sung. Both sounded horrible in my
ears. The dishes contained cooked hazel-hens and roast pheasants, with
the feathers sticking in their heads; sparkling wine filled the cups.
I was pressed to eat and drink, but neither the food nor the liquor
had any taste. Once the bride, my cousin, as is the custom with very
young girls, offered me the spur of the pheasant's breast, saying,
jokingly, 'Break this spur with me, and we shall see which of us two
gets a husband first.' I seized hold of my end of the spur; I tugged
and tugged, and at last broke it. The largest half remained in my
hand. The bride laughed. 'Theudelinde shall be the first married!' she
cried. I blushed; it seemed to me something terrible that the spirits
of my dead ancestors should be so frivolous."
The worthy pastor said nothing. Nevertheless, he was minded to agree
with his penitent. He could not imagine why blessed souls, or even
condemned ones, should occupy themselves breaking pheasant bones with
an old maid, of all people in the world.
"What gave me most offence," continued Theudelinde, "was the
outrageous behavior of my uncle Ladislaus. One minute he shrieked,
then laughed loudly, sang horrid songs. Again he broke out into
fearful curses, scorned the saints, the pope, the sacraments, made
witticisms that brought a blush to the faces of the ladies, and blew
all his tobacco-smoke over me. I shook the skirt of my green silk to
prevent the horrid smell sticking to it, but I felt this precaution
was of little use. My uncle Ladislaus began then to tease me, and said
I had concealed the prophetic bone in the pocket of my green dress. My
face glowed with shame, for it was true. I denied it, however,
whereupon he began to swear in his heathenish way, and to thump with
his fists on the table until the vault resounded with his blows. My
cousins put their hands over his mouth. Then he spoke through his
empty eye-sockets. It was terrible! He cursed all the saints in the
calendar and the emperor. My great-uncle, the archbishop, stretched
out his hands and damned him; my grandfather, the chancellor, sealed
the sentence; and my great-uncle, the field-marshal, drew his sword
and cut off my uncle's death's-head. The head rolled over, and fell at
my feet, still holding the pipe between its teeth, and blew its filthy
breath over me. Then I arose and fled."
The pastor had now made up his mind that the whole story was nothing
but the dream of an hysterical woman. It was strange, however, that
the countess should have the same vision so often, and that it should
always begin in the same manner.
As she now concluded her recital with the words, "As I took off my
silk dress it smelled horribly of tobacco-smoke," a brilliant idea
came to Father Mahok.
"Will you excuse my asking you where your green dress is?" he asked,
gravely.
The countess betrayed some embarrassment.
"I do not know. My wardrobe is in the care of Fraulein Emerenzia--"
"Allow me to ask you the question, did you not take the dress off in
this apartment?"
"I no longer remember. Emerenzia has been here since; she may know."
"Will you grant me the favor, countess, to send for Fraulein
Emerenzia?"
"Certainly. She will be here in a minute."
The countess pressed her finger twice on the electric apparatus, and
the companion entered.
"Fraulein," said the countess, "you remember my green Gros de Naples
silk, bordered with a trimming of fur?"
"Yes; it is a pelisse of peculiar cut, with hanging sleeves, and
fastened by a silk band and buckle."
"That is the dress," returned the countess. "Where is it?"
"In the wardrobe. I hung it there myself, first putting camphor in the
sleeves, that the moths might not get at the fur."
"When did you do this?"
"Last summer."
The pastor laughed slyly to himself. "Now," thought he, "the countess
must be convinced that she dreamed the whole scene she has so
accurately described."
"Have I not worn it since last summer?" questioned Theudelinde.
"Not once. The open-hanging sleeves are only for the hottest weather."
"Impossible!"
"But, countess," put in the priest, "it is easy to convince yourself
of what ma'm'selle says. You have only to look into the wardrobe. Who
keeps the key?"
"Ma'm'selle Emerenzia."
"Do you command me to open the press?" asked the companion, with a
discomfited look.
"I do," answered the countess, nodding to the pastor to follow her
into the next room.
Emerenzia, her face puckered into an expression of annoyance, drew her
bunch of keys from her pocket, and placed one in the lock of an
antique and highly ornamented press, of which she threw the doors
open. At least fifty silk dresses hung there, side by side. The
countess never allowed any of her clothes to get into strange hands;
no man's eye should ever rest upon what she had worn. Through this
museum of old clothes Emerenzia's fingers went with unerring
certainty, and drew forth the oft-mentioned green silk dress with the
fur trimming.
"Here it is," she said, shortly.
The pastor was triumphant, but the countess, whose nerves were more
impressionable than those of ordinary mortals, grew suddenly pale and
began to shake all over.
"Take that dress down," she said, in a whisper. And Emerenzia, with a
jerk, tore it from its peg. What, in Heaven's name, had come to the
pastor and her mistress?
The countess took it from her hand, and held it, while she turned her
head the other way, across his nose.
"Do you smell it?" she said. "Is it tobacco-smoke?"
Father Mahok was astonished. This fine silk dress, straight from out
of a lady's wardrobe, smelled as strongly of the commonest tobacco as
the coat of a peasant who had passed his night in an ale-house. Before
he could answer Theudelinde's question she was ready with another.
From the pocket of the green Gros de Naples she now drew forth a
broken pheasant bone.
"And this?" she asked. But here her strength was exhausted. Without
waiting for a reply, she fell fainting on the sofa.
Emerenzia, sobbing loudly, fell helplessly into an arm-chair. The
clergyman was so upset by the whole thing that, in his embarrassment,
he opened the doors of three more wardrobes before finding the one
which communicated with the sitting-room. Then he summoned the
servants to attend to their mistress. _The evidence of witchcraft was
proved._