Dress changes the manners.--VOLTAIRE.
Whose garments wither shall receive faded smiles.--SHERIDAN
KNOWLES.
Men of sense follow fashion so far that they are neither
conspicuous for their excess nor peculiar by their opposition to
it.--ANONYMOUS.
The famous French painter, Girard, when quite young, was the bearer
of a letter of introduction to a high officer at the court of
Napoleon I. Girard was poorly dressed, and his reception was cold;
but the courtier discovered in him such evidences of talent and
good sense that on Girard’s rising to take leave, he arose also,
and accompanied him to the antechamber.
The change in the courtier’s manner was so marked that Girard could
not suppress an expression of surprise.
“My young friend,” said the courtier, “we receive strangers
according to their dress; we take leave of them according to their
merits.”
Good clothes are far from being sufficient to gain one admittance
to the better circles of society, but without them admittance is
impossible. When we go out into the world, it is not sufficient to
do as others do, we must also dress as others dress.
He is best dressed whose dress attracts least attention; and in
order not to attract attention, one’s dress must be seasonable,
appropriate, conform to the prevailing fashion, without going in
the least beyond it, and appear to be comfortable.
It requires something more than a full purse to enable one to dress
well: it requires sense, taste, refinement. Indeed, dress may be
considered in the light of a fine art. It is a pretty sure index of
character, and few dress really well that would not be considered
persons of culture.
In dress, as in all things else, the golden rule is to avoid
extremes. The man of sense and taste never wears anything that is
“loud,” flashy, or peculiar; he yields always to fashion, but never
is a slave to it.
The first thing to be considered in the replenishing of one’s
wardrobe is the material. This should always be good. Low priced
stuffs are rarely, if ever, cheap, and they are certainly not cheap
unless, though low-priced, they are of good quality. As a rule, one
suit of clothes that costs fifty dollars does more service than two
suits that cost the same sum. And then the low-priced suit never
looks well, while the high-priced suit looks well to the last, if
it is kept clean and care is taken to have it occasionally pressed
into shape--a fact that few men properly appreciate.
“Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy,
But not expressed in fancy; rich, not gaudy,
For the apparel oft proclaims the man.”
There is but one way to get a good fitting shirt, and that is to
have it made. Nor is this all. You must try one on and have it
“fitted,” and then have the others made exactly like the pattern
shirt. Nearly every man has one shoulder lower than the other, and
if this peculiarity is not considered, the bosom of a shirt will
never sit smoothly. It will bulge on the low-shoulder side. For
several reasons it is better to have shirts made open in the back.
Yet open-backed shirts are less worn now than they were; indeed,
the fastidious nowadays wear only shirts open in front. They fit
better around the neck. It is better to have the collar separate
and for some reasons the cuffs also--dress shirts excepted,
perhaps. Let your collars always be in and strictly within the
fashion, unless you would look like a rowdy, in which case you
are at liberty to go to any extreme you please and to gratify
any vulgar caprice you may chance to have. Your cuffs should be
no larger than is necessary to admit of your slipping your hand
through them when they are buttoned. Why should a man wear a cuff
so large that one may see up to his elbow? A cuff so large that it
slips down over the hand has an unæsthetic, slouchy look, besides
being in the way and being very uncomfortable in warm weather.
Colored shirts may be worn travelling, in the country, and, some
say, in the morning in town; but most men of taste prefer white.
The pattern of colored shirts should always be small and the color
quiet.
If the coat, trousers, and vest of business and morning suits are
not made of the same cloth, the coat and vest should be of the
same, and be darker than the trousers. Men that cannot or do not
choose to spend much money with their tailor, should always select
dark stuffs. A dark morning suit may be worn on many occasions
where the wearing of a light suit would be in singularly bad taste.
The fashion should be followed, but beware of going to extremes,
if you would not be taken for one of those vulgar, empty-headed
fops that, if spring-bottomed trousers, for example, are the mode,
insist on theirs being made to bell out at the bottom till their
legs look as though they had been put on bottom up. The wrinkles
and “knees” should be pressed out of trousers about every two
weeks. The more closely woven the cloth the longer a garment keeps
its shape. The vest should be kept buttoned from bottom to top,
and the buttons on both coat and vest should be renewed as soon as
they begin to show the effects of wear. There is always something
“Jakey” in the appearance of a man that goes about with his vest
half buttoned. Both coat and vest should be made snug around the
waist and loose over the chest. A garment that is tight around the
waist tends to make the wearer stand straight, while one that is
tight over the chest tends to make him stoop. The carriage of men
that do not wear suspenders is generally better than that of men
that do wear them. If a single-breasted garment is too tight over
the chest, the trouble is generally beyond remedy, as the tailor
cannot add to the front; in a double-breasted garment, the moving
of the buttons generally suffices.
Single-breasted overcoats, made with a “fly,” are most worn, and
are, from every point of view, the most desirable. A short-waisted,
double-breasted overcoat has been a good deal worn by quite
young men of late. It is fashionable, and would, perhaps, become
generally popular, if it did not tend to make the wearer look like
a footman. The man of taste always selects for his overcoats dark,
quiet colors.
There is nothing a man wears in which he shows his sense or his
want of it more than in his boots and shoes. The man of sense
and taste has his shoes made long, broad in the sole and in the
shank, and with a big and only moderately high heel. No matter
what the fashion chances to be, if you see a man that pinches his
toes, you may be sure it would take a very small hat to pinch
his head. The shoe that does not look comfortable never looks
well. There are many of the New York women that wear shoes that
distort the feet and are most uncomfortable; such shoes, however,
are rarely, if ever, seen on the feet of the New York ladies.
Many persons have one foot longer than the other. In such cases,
the shoe for the longer foot must be made longer than the other,
otherwise the longer foot will look to be the shorter when clothed.
This, is something that few shoemakers know. The cloth of the
tops of gaiters should always be dark. Fancy shoe leather is, if
possible, more offensive than flashy neckties. Short, narrow-toed,
high-heeled shoes often cause the big-toe nails to grow into the
flesh. If taken in time, the trouble is easily remedied by scraping
the nail on the top, cutting it in a semilunar form, with the
concavity looking forward, and raising the corners and putting a
bit of cork or cotton under them. The nails of the big toes should
always be thus cut, care being taken to leave the corners long.
In nothing that a man wears is it less desirable--in New York, at
least--to be among the first to adopt a new fashion than in the
hat, especially the silk hat. Here, the new styles in silk hats
are first seen, as a rule, on the heads of the ward politicians,
the keepers of the drinking saloons, and the gamblers. The least
desirable hat for city wear is the soft felt. Besides having a
slouchy look, it is not easy to get it off one’s head gracefully in
saluting an acquaintance in the street. They are little worn by any
but a few long-haired men, who affect the picturesque.
A man’s jewelry should be good and simple. False jewelry, like
every other form of falsehood, is vulgar. Unlike a woman’s jewelry,
a man’s should always seem to serve a purpose. To this rule there
is, as we shall see, but one exception.
A man’s watch, to be in thoroughly good taste, should never be very
large, nor very thick, nor elaborately chased, nor should it have
a hunting-case, unless his business or pleasure renders him liable
to break a crystal, when he is out of the easy reach of a jeweller
to replace it. Very large, fancifully chased watches always have
a common, cheap look; no man of any taste ever chooses one. As
a rule, the more valuable the watch the plainer the case. The
hunting-cased watch is carried largely by men that, in a measure
at least, want a watch for the same reason that a peacock wants a
tail. Probably as desirable a watch, in appearance at least, as
could be found anywhere, is a plain-cased open-faced watch, sold
by Tiffany & Co. It has what they call their extra thin movement.
Nothing in the way of a watch could be more tasteful.
The watch-chain should always be small and the pattern plain. If
the links are chased, the chasing must not be elaborate. Nothing
does more toward vulgarizing a man’s appearance than a big,
elaborately chased watch-chain. Indeed, the young man that wears
such a chain and attaches it in one of the lower button-holes of
his vest has taken a long stride toward making himself look like a
barber’s apprentice. Watch-chains that go around the neck are no
longer worn. The vest-chain should be attached nearly as high up as
it will reach, in a button-hole, and not in a hole specially made
for the purpose.
If a locket or seal is worn, it should be very plain. If a man
wears a ring, it should be on the third finger of the left hand.
This is the only piece of jewelry a man is allowed to wear that
does not seem to serve a purpose. Some Englishmen of culture and
high social position wear nowadays more than one ring, and wear
rings on the little finger as well as on the third; but this is an
example that neither taste nor discretion would counsel an American
to follow. All kinds of rings are worn by men except cluster rings;
they are worn by women only. Scarf-rings and collar-buttons with
settings are in very bad taste. Diamond studs are not worn by men
of the better sort, even when in evening dress; they are considered
vulgar and ostentatious. Three studs in a dress shirt are to
be preferred to one. Indeed, the single stud is as unartistic
as anything well could be. Fashion changes in jewelry, as in
everything else; but if a man follows the rule: “Plain, good, and
seem to serve a purpose,” he will never go far wrong.
It should not be necessary to add that the wearing of imitation
diamonds is the very extreme of vulgarity. A man of taste would as
soon be seen with rings in his ears as with an imitation diamond
pin or stud in his shirt bosom. The genuine diamond or none, and
that never in a breastpin, unless you do not object to being taken
for a horse-jockey; and never in a stud, unless you are in full
evening dress, and, even then, plain gold or white enamelled studs
are to be preferred. Scarf-pins should, in strictness, be worn
only in Claudent, Ascot, and puff scarfs; permissible, however, in
four-in-hands.
Nowadays, with few exceptions, men wear the hair very short, and
the exceptions are not found among men of taste. The most artistic
and becoming cut is that that trims the hair very short on the
sides and back of the head, and leaves it comparatively long on the
top, for the reason that a high head is always more pleasing than
a low, broad one. The “part” should be high up--in the middle, if
one chooses to put it there. Parting the hair down the back of the
head, as some men do, is only a little less objectionable than the
plastering of a lock down on the forehead--a fashion much affected
by bartenders and waiters in oyster saloons. The head should be
frequently washed, especially in warm weather; otherwise, the hair
will have a disagreeable odor. Brushing with a brush that reaches
the skin tends to keep the hair from falling out. Pomatums and
other inventions of the barbers are no longer used.
Most men look best with a full beard, if it is kept properly
trimmed and is otherwise properly cared for. A man with a beard
that reaches down over his chest or with a moustache that is so
long as to be in the way is a disgusting object to look on. Men
that wear such beards are generally men that are not happy unless
they make donkeys of themselves in some way--if not in one, then
in another. If a man shaves a part of the face only, he should
shave that part that is most prominent. A man with a prominent
chin and thin cheeks should shave his chin and let his beard grow
on the sides of his face; on the contrary, a man with a retreating
or a light chin and full cheeks should shave his cheeks and let
his beard grow on his chin. In short, the beard should be so
trimmed, if worn full, or so cut, if only a part is worn, as to
give regularity to the outline of the face. The eccentricities some
men indulge in in cutting their beards is in very bad taste; so
also is the training of the moustache to the right and the left _à
la grenadier_. This practice gives a man the appearance of having
nothing else to do or to think of; and then it is pretty sure to
get him into the habit of continually tugging at his moustache--a
habit that is not quite so bad as would be that of sucking his
fingers, but the difference is not great. The color nature has
given to a man’s beard is always the one best suited to his
complexion. He that changes that color, no matter what the color
is, only vulgarizes his appearance.
Every man, no matter who he is, should be able to shave himself
quickly and well. If he has difficulty in learning to use the
razor, he should persevere in his endeavors to learn, allowing
nothing short of the loss of at least one ear to discourage him.
The man that shaves at all should shave every day; no man looks
presentable with a two days’ growth of beard on his face. Shaving
should be as much a part of the regular morning toilet as the
brushing of the hair. Several razors are necessary, as all razors
“tire” by continual use. The microscope has shown that this tiring
is due to the disarranging of the particles of the steel, and
that when a razor is allowed to rest for a sufficient length of
time, the particles readjust themselves, restoring the razor to
its original usefulness. Much depends on having a good strap and
knowing how to use it.
The nails should be kept moderately long--very short nails have a
plebeian look--and be so cut that they are a little more pointed
than the upper ends of the nails are. They should not be scraped,
and in cutting care should be taken not to encroach too much on the
angles. Either practice, in time, results in serious injury. They
cannot be kept in good shape without using a file. Of course the
nails should be kept scrupulously clean.
The teeth of most persons, if properly cared for from childhood,
will not only never ache, but will also last a lifetime. But how
few sets of teeth are properly cared for from childhood! The
condition of their children’s teeth is a matter that comparatively
few parents pay any attention to until the children complain of
having the toothache, whereas they should see that their children’s
teeth are kept scrupulously clean, that the cavities in them are
filled before they get large enough to do any serious harm,
and that a dentist’s aid is called in, if necessary, to secure
regularity. Art can do more--much more--than most people think
to make a child’s teeth grow in regular. It has been often said
that the chief reason so many Americans have bad teeth is that
they eat so much candy and other sweetmeats. This is an error.
This is not the chief reason. The chief reason is that we, in
common with many persons of other nations, do not use our teeth
sufficiently; we live almost exclusively on food that requires
very little masticating; and as for the front teeth, we scarcely
use them at all. The child that is fed on hard-tack is likely to
have much better teeth than the child that is fed on porridge. Next
to disuse, acids--pickles, lemons, and the like--probably do the
teeth most harm. Then come the practices that tend to disarrange
the stomach--eating between meals and the eating of unwholesome
food--and the habit of breathing with the mouth open.
There are many foolish persons that think that dentists do more
harm than good, and that some of them do not hesitate to bore holes
in their patients’ teeth and then fill them in order to increase
the amount of their bills. They do nothing of the sort. Not that
there are no dentists that would be sufficiently dishonest to do
such a thing, but they would not get paid for their labor, it would
be so great. The chief harm dentists do is in extracting aching
teeth, in compliance with the wishes of their patients, when the
teeth should be treated and preserved by filling. A tooth must
be in a sorry condition when a dentist will extract it for one
of his own family. Let any one that would keep his teeth go to a
good dentist, and submit to his discretion, and not presume to
dictate in a matter he knows nothing about. No man that does not
keep his teeth clean looks like a gentleman, if he shows them. If
one’s teeth have been neglected until they have become discolored
and have accumulated a covering of tartar, one must first go to
a dentist and have the discoloration and tartar removed, after
which it is not a difficult matter to keep them in good condition.
A toothbrush should not be too wide, and should be used on one
row of teeth at a time. A very wide brush, used on both rows at
a time, never reaches the edges of the gum--the points where the
tartar always begins to accumulate. The tooth-powder used must be
soluble; if it is not, it gets between the gums and the neck of
the tooth, remains there, and tends to inflame the periosteum. For
this reason, neither pulverized charcoal nor cigar-ashes should
be used. As a brush does not reach between the teeth, a sharpened
stick should occasionally be used with a powder. At long intervals
a little pumice-stone, if necessary, may also be used with a stick,
but great care should be taken not to let it get under the edge of
the gums. Dentists generally use orange wood.
Men that do not have their hair frequently cut, keep their faces
clean shaven, and their teeth clean are never welcome in the
society of ladies, should they chance to know any. They may be well
received by women of the lower orders, but women that are ladies
are never drawn toward men that do not have the appearance of
being neat in their persons. Ladies may and often do tolerate such
men; in fact, they are often compelled to tolerate them, but they
generally do it with ill-concealed reluctance.
Men of taste that carry canes select those that are strong, plain,
stiff, light, and small. Very large canes are in very bad taste,
especially for young men.
A few hints concerning the wearing of a man’s clothes should
suffice.
A full-dress suit consists of a swallow-tailed coat, a low white
or black single-breasted vest, black trousers, a white necktie, a
stand-up collar, (?) a high black hat, and, properly, of a pair of
very light kid gloves.
This dress should never be worn until evening, _i.e._, never
previously to the dinner hour, no matter what the occasion. There
are a few men, in the large cities, where they dine late--at six or
seven o’clock--that put on their dress suits regularly every day
before dinner and wear them for the rest of the day.
A white necktie should never be worn except with a full-dress suit,
save by clergymen and a few elderly men that never wear any other
color.
Black trousers should never be worn except with a dress coat, save
at funerals.
A high hat should not be worn with a sack coat, especially if the
color is light.
A low hat should not be worn with a long coat--a double-breasted
frock, for example.
Straw hats should be worn only with light summer suits.
Dark suits are to be preferred for Sundays, especially in town, and
light suits should never be worn to church anywhere.
Double-breasted frock coats should always be of black or gray
material.
At small, informal gatherings most men consider themselves
sufficiently dressed when they wear black frock coats and dark
trousers. Indeed, there is no good reason why men should appear
in full dress on any occasion where the ladies do not wear full
dress. At public entertainments, for example, where the ladies
wear their bonnets, the man that wears a black frock coat, dark
trousers, and light kid gloves is better dressed--because more
appropriately--than he that wears a full-dress suit. True,
the practice of wearing such a suit on such occasions entails
additional expense, as otherwise a business or walking suit and a
dress suit may be made to serve for all occasions.
At home, the first consideration with pretty nearly every man will
always be comfort. No man, however, that has any regard for the
proprieties will ever appear at the table, whether there are any
strangers present or not, or will show himself to any one with whom
he is not on a familiar footing, in his shirt-sleeves.