A Morning Concert, in which the Opposition is as great as Black to
White.
Among my father's associates there was a man of about forty years of
age, Dick Harness by name. He had received a wound in the hip from a
grape-shot, and his leg having in consequence contracted, it occasioned
him to limp very much; but he was as strong and hearty in all other
respects as a man could be. He was a very merry fellow, full of jokes,
and if any one told a story which was at all verging on the marvelous,
he was sure to tell another which would be still more incredible. He
played the fiddle and sang to his own accompaniments, which were very
droll, as he extracted very strange noises from his instrument.
Sometimes his bow would be on the wrong side of the bridge, sometimes
down at the keys; besides which he produced sounds by thumping the
fiddle as well as by touching its strings as a guitar; indeed, he could
imitate in a certain way almost every instrument and most of the noises
made by animals. He had one fault, for which he used to be occasionally
punished, which was, he was too fond of the bottle; but he was a great
favorite, and therefore screened by the men, and as much as possible
overlooked by the officers. The punishment for a pensioner getting drunk
was, at that time, being made to wear a yellow instead of a blue coat,
which made a man look very conspicuous.
I recollect one day he had the yellow coat on, when a party of ladies
and gentlemen came to see the hospital. Perceiving that he was dressed
so differently from the other pensioners, one of the ladies' curiosity
was excited, and at last she called him to her and said, "Pray, my good
man, why do you wear a yellow coat when the other pensioners have blue
ones?"
"Bless your handsome face, ma'am!" replied Dick, "don't you really
know?"
"No, indeed," replied she.
"Well, then, ma'am, perhaps you may have heard of the glorious battle of
the Nile, in which Nelson gave the French such a drubbing?"
"Oh, yes," cried all the ladies and gentlemen, who had now crowded about
him.
"Well, ladies and gentlemen, I had the good fortune to be in that great
victory, and all we _Nilers_, as we are called, are permitted to wear a
yellow coat as a mark of distinction, while the common pensioners wear
nothing but blue."
"Dear me!" said the lady, "and do I really speak to one of those brave
fellows who fought at the battle of the Nile?" and she put her hand into
her pocket and pulled out five shillings. "There," said she, "I hope
you'll not be affronted, but accept this from me."
"Not at all, ma'am," replied Dick, pocketing the money.
Then the whole party made a subscription for him, and Dick went off with
a handful of silver.
There was, however, another man who contributed much to the fun created
by Dick Harness. He was an American black, who had served as cook in the
"Majestic," and had been wounded in the battle of the Nile, He had
received a bullet in the knee, which had occasioned a stiff joint; and,
as his leg was bent, he wore a short wooden stump. He also could play
his fiddle and sing his songs, but in neither case so well as Dick
Harness, although he thought otherwise himself. We used to call him
Opposition Bill, but his name was Bill White; at least that was the
purser's name that he went by when on board of a man-of-war. His
pleasure was to follow Dick Harness everywhere; and if Dick sung he
would sing, if Dick played he would play also--not at the same time, but
if Dick stopped Bill would strike up. Dick used to call him his black
shadow; and sometimes he would execute a flourish on his fiddle which
would be quite a puzzler to Opposition Bill, who would attempt something
of the kind, which invariably set every one laughing. At last Dick
Harness's performances were not considered to be complete if Opposition
Bill was not in his company; and, as they were both very good-tempered,
funny fellows, they were a great amusement, especially in the fine
weather, when they would sit on the benches upon the terrace about six
or eight yards apart, for they seldom came nearer, and play and sing
alternately. The songs sung by Dick Harness were chiefly old sea songs;
those of Opposition Bill were picked up from every part of the world,
principally, however, those sung by the negroes who worked on the
plantations in Virginia and Carolina.
Peter Anderson, my father, Ben, and many others were sitting on the
benches, basking in the morning's sun, when Dick Harness made his
appearance, limping along with his fiddle under his arm.
"Come along, Dick," said Ben the Whaler, "we'll stow close, and make
room for you here."
"You must make elbow-room, too, my hearty, or I shan't be able to
fiddle. Come, what will you have this fine morning?" said Harness,
tuning his instrument. As soon as it was in tune he flourished a prelude
from the top of the scale to the bottom, ending with an "Eh-haw!
eh-haw!" in imitation of the braying of a donkey.
"Give us the Spanish Ladies, Dick," said my father. As this song was
very popular at that time among the seamen, and is now almost forgotten,
I shall by inserting it here for a short time rescue it from oblivion.
"Farewell and adieu to you, Spanish ladies,
Farewell and adieu to you, ladies of Spain;
For we have received orders
For to sail to old England,
But we hope in a short time to see you again."
"Stop a moment, lads. I must screw him up a little more."
Dick regulated his first string, and then continued.
"We'll rant and we'll roar, like true British sailors,
We'll rant and we'll roar across the salt seas;
Until we strike soundings
In the Channel of old England
(From Ushant to Scilly 'tis thirty-five leagues).
"Then we hove our ship to, with the wind at sou'west,
my boys,
Then we hove our ship to, for to strike soundings clear;
Then we filled the maintopsail
And bore right away, my boys,
And straight up the Channel of old England did steer.
"So the first land we made, it is called the Deadman,
Next Ram Head, off Plymouth, Start, Portland, and
the Wight;
We sail-ed by Beachy,
By Fairly and Dungeness,
And then bore away for the South Foreland light.
"Now the signal it was made for the grand fleet to
anchor,
All in the Downs that night for to meet;
Then stand by your stoppers,
See clear your shank painters,
Haul all your clew garnets, stick out tacks and sheets."
Here Dick was interrupted by another fiddle, which went "turn,
turn--scrape--turn, turn."
"There's Opposition Bill, Dick," said my father; "I thought you would
bring him out."
"All's right," replied Dick; "hope he aren't affronted; but he looks
very black this morning."
"Now let every man lake off his full bumper,
Let every man take off his full bowl;
For we will be jolly
And drown melancholy,
With a health to each jovial and true-hearted soul."
"Now, then, Billy, fire away."
"You tink I 'bey your order, you Dick? No, sar, suppose I fire away, I
go off. I not go off, I stay here."
"Well, but if you play, you'll get in trouble, Billy."
"How I get in trouble?"
"Why, you'll get in a scrape, won't you?"
"Ho! you just got out of one, anyhow."
Dick Harness then said to those who sat by him, "I'll make him sing the
Negro General."
"Well, if you will howl, Mr. Billy," cried out Harness, "at all events
don't give us that abominable Nigger General. It always gives me the
toothache."
"Now I tink dat very fine song; so you may have whole jaw-ache for all I
care. I sing dat, Mr. Dick; you jealous of dat song, I know."