"Who dares think one thing and another tell,
My heart detests him as the gates of hell."
"A little foolish going for that walk, wasn't it?" says he, leading her
to a low cushioned chair over which a gay magnolia bends its white
blossoms. His manner is innocence itself; ignorance itself would perhaps
better express it. He has decided on ignoring everything; though a
shrewd guess that she saw something of his passages with Miss Maliphant
last night has now become almost a certainty. "I thought you seemed
rather played out last night--fatigued--done to death. I assure you I
noticed it. I could hardly," with deep and affectionate concern, "fail
to notice anything that affected you."
"You are very good!" says Miss Kavanagh icily. Mr. Beauclerk lets a full
minute go by, and then----
"What have I done to merit that tone from you?" asks he, not angrily;
only sorrowfully. He has turned his handsome face full on hers, and is
regarding her with proud, reproachful eyes. "It is idle to deny," says
he, with some emotion, half of which, to do him justice, is real, "that
you are changed to me; something has happened to alter the feelings
of--of--friendship--that I dared to hope you entertained for me. I had
hoped still more, Joyce--but----What has happened?" demands he suddenly,
with all the righteous strength of one who, free from guilt, resents
accusation of it.
"Have I accused you?" says she, coldly.
"Yes, a thousand times, yes. Do you think your voice alone can condemn?
Your eyes are even crueller judges."
"Well I am sorry," says she, faintly smiling. "My eyes must be deceivers
then. I bear you no malice, believe me."
"So be it," says he, with an assumption of relief that is very well
done. "After all, I have worried myself, I daresay, very unnecessarily.
Let us talk of something else, Miss Maliphant, for example," with a
glance at her, and a pleasant smile. "Nice girl eh? I miss her."
"She went early this morning, did she?" says Joyce, scarcely knowing
what to say. Her lips feel a little dry; an agonized certainty that she
is slowly growing crimson beneath his steady gaze brings the tears to
her eyes.
"Too early. I quite hoped to be up to see her off, but sleep had made
its own of me and I failed to wake. Such a good, genuine girl! Universal
favorite, don't you think? Very honest, and very," breaking into an
apparently irrepressible laugh, "ugly! Ah! well now," with smiling self
condemnation, "that's really a little too bad; isn't it?"
"A great deal too bad," says Joyce, gravely. "I shouldn't speak of her
if I were you."
"But why, my dear girl?" with arched brows and a little gesture of his
handsome hands. "I allow her everything but beauty, and surely it would
be hypocrisy to mention that in the same breath with her."
"It isn't fair--it isn't sincere," says the girl almost passionately.
"Do you think I am ignorant of everything, that I did not see you with
her last night in the garden? Oh!" with a touch of scorn that is yet
full of pain, "you should not. You should not, indeed!"
In an instant he grows confused. Something in the lovely horror of her
eyes undoes him. Only for an instant--after that he turns the momentary
confusion to good account.
"Ah! you did see her, then, poor girl!" says he. "Well, I'm sorry about
that for her sake."
"Why for her sake?" still regarding him with that charming disdain. "For
your own, perhaps, but why for hers?"
Beauclerk pauses: then rising suddenly, stands before her. Grief and
gentle indignation sit upon his massive brow. He looks the very
incarnation of injured rectitude.
"Do you know, Joyce, you have always been ready to condemn, to misjudge
me," says he in a low, hurt tone. "I have often noticed it, yet have
failed to understand why it is. I was right, you see, when I told myself
last night and this morning that you were harboring unkindly thoughts
toward me. You have not been open with me, you have been willfully
secretive, and, believe me, that is a mistake. Candor, complete and
perfect, is the only great virtue that will steer one clear through all
the shoals and rocks of life. Be honest, above board, and, I can assure
you, you will never regret it. You accused me just now of insincerity.
Have you been sincere?"
There is a dead pause. He allows it to last long enough to make it
dramatic, and to convince himself he has impressed her, and then, with a
very perceptible increase of dignified pain in his voice, he goes on.
"I feel I ought not to explain under the circumstances, but as it is to
you"--heavy emphasis, and a second affected silence. "You have heard,
perhaps, of Miss Maliphant's cousin in India?"
"No," says Joyce, after racking her brain in vain for some memory of the
cousin question. And, indeed, it would have been nothing short of a
miracle if she could have remembered anything about that apocryphal
person.
"You will understand that I speak to you in the strictest confidence,"
says Beauclerk, earnestly: "I wouldn't for anything you could offer me,
that it should get back to that poor girl's ears that I had been
discussing her and the most sacred feelings of her heart. Well, there is
a cousin, and she--you may have noticed that she and I were great
friends?"
"Yes," says Joyce, whose heart is beating now to suffocation. Oh! has
she wronged him? Does she still wrong him? Is this vile, suspicious
feeling within her one to be encouraged? Is all this story of his, this
simple explanation--false--false?
"I was, indeed, a sort of confidant of hers. Poor dear girl! it was a
relief to her to talk to somebody."
"There were others."
"But none here who knew him."
"You knew him then? Is his name Maliphant, too?" asks Joyce, ashamed of
her cross-examination, yet driven to it by some power beyond her
control.
"You mustn't ask me that," says Beauclerk playfully. "There are some
things I must keep even from you. Though you see I go very far to
satisfy your unjust suspicions of me. You can, however, guess a good
deal; you--saw her crying?"
"She was not crying," says Joyce slowly, a little puzzled. Miss
Maliphant had seemed at the moment in question well pleased.
"No! Not when you saw her? Ah! that must have been later then," with a
sigh, "you see now I am betraying more than I should. However, I can
depend upon your silence. It will be a small secret between you and me."
"And Miss Maliphant," says Joyce, coldly. "As for me, what is the
secret?"
"You haven't understood? Not really? Well, between you and me and the
wall," with delightful gaiety, "I think she gives a thought or two to
that cousin. I fancy," whispering, "she is even in--eh? you know."
"I don't," says Joyce slowly, who is now longing to believe in him, and
yet is held steadily backward by some strong feeling.
"I believe she is in love with him," says Beauclerk, still in a
mysterious whisper. "But it is a sore subject," with an expressive
frown. "Not best pleased when it is mentioned to her. Mauvais sujet, you
understand. But girls are often foolish in that way. Better say nothing
about it."
"I shall say nothing, of course," says Joyce. "Why should I? It is
nothing to me, though I am sorry for her."
Yet as she says this, a doubt arises in her mind as to whether she need
be sorry. Is there a cousin in India? Could that big, jolly, lively
girl, who had come into the conservatory with Beauclerk last night, with
the light of triumph in her eyes, be the victim of an unhappy love
affair? Should she write and ask her if there is a cousin in India? Oh,
no, no! She could not do that! How horrible, how hateful to distrust him
like this! What a detestable mind must be hers. And besides, why dwell
so much upon it. Why not accept him as a pleasing acquaintance. One with
whom to pass a pleasant hour now and then. Why ever again regard him as
a possible lover!
A little shudder runs through her. At this moment it seems to her that
she could never really have so regarded him. And yet only last night----
And now. What is it? Does she still doubt? Will that strange, curious,
tormenting feeling that once she felt for him return no more. Is it gone
forever? Oh! that it might be so!