"Elvira has been misnamed. Elvis might be more appropriate."
"Why I had no idea," Titus mused. "Now I'll have to rerun those tests
with the new bias."
Berry flared up again. "You don't even have a lab left to run a test in.
You can't keep Wims after this!"
"Are you blaming poor Wims for what happened?"
"How can you sit there and ask that question without choking? Ever since
that two-legged disaster was hired to sweep up, everybody in the
psycho-research division has suffered from one accident after another;
even you haven't remained unscathed. Why within the month he arrived we
lost the plaque we had won two years running for our unmarred safety
record. In fact, the poor fellow who came to remove it from its place of
honor in the staff dining room fell from the ladder and broke his neck.
Guess who was holding the ladder?"
"I was there at the time," Titus said, "and I saw the entire
performance. Wims did nothing but hold the ladder as he had been
instructed to do. Old John, instead of confining his attention to what
he was doing, kept worrying about whether or not the ladder was being
held firmly enough and, as could be expected, he dropped the plaque,
made a grab for it and down he went."
"Don't you think it significant, Titus, that Old John had been the
university handyman for eighteen years, had climbed up and down ladders,
over roofs, and had never fallen or had a serious accident until Wims
came upon the scene? And this is just about the case with everyone
here?"
"Yes, I think it is very significant."
"Then how can anyone but Wims be blamed?"
"But _Wims_ never has the accidents. _He_ never gets hurt; not so much
as a scratch!"
"The devil never gets burned."
"My dear Berry, let the scientist in you consider the fact that never
yet has Wims so much as laid a finger on any of our people. And Wims
never knocks over equipment, or lets things explode, or sets fire to
anything. I find it very odd that it is only my staff that does these
things and yet to a man they invariably fix the blame on an
eighteen-year-old lad who seems to want nothing more out of life than to
be liked. Don't you find it odd?"
"The only thing I find odd is your keeping him in the face of the
unanimous staff request to get rid of him."
"And have you ever thought of what my reason might be?"
Dr. Berry looked hard at Dr. Titus and said with unmistakable emphasis,
"Some of your people think they know."
It took Titus a moment to fully understand, then he said severely:
"Let's discuss this sensibly."
"There's no point in further discussion. There's only one thing more I
have to say. I'm not going to endanger my life any longer. Either Wims
goes or you can have my resignation."
"Are you serious?"
"Certainly."
"Well then, it was pleasant having a good friend as an associate. I'm
certain you will easily find something more satisfactory. Of course you
can depend on me for a glowing letter of reference."
Berry sat openmouthed. "You mean to say you'd keep a mere porter in
preference to me?"