More and more, as the days passed, Kate congratulated herself on having
taken Jacqueline's affairs in hand before any harm was done. Startled
out of her own preoccupation by Jemima's discovery of how matters stood
between Jacqueline and the author, she continued to watch the younger
girl narrowly; but she saw no signs of secret grief, nor even of wounded
pride. The girl had never been more radiant, her cheeks a-glow, her eyes
so soft and lustrous that sometimes her mother's grew dim at sight of
them. She remembered a time when her own mirror had shown her just such
a look of brooding revery.
"Channing has done nothing more than wake her womanhood," thought the
mother. "And now, now it is Philip's turn!"
Philip, since his return from the mountains, spent more time than ever
at Storm. Kate noted with satisfaction the added gentleness of his
manner with Jacqueline, and threw them together as much as possible.
Jemima, too, seemed to have a great deal of time to give her younger
sister in those days. Between them all, Jacqueline was rarely alone; but
she had no longer any wish to be alone. She avoided the Ruin now, and
took no more long rides about the country, except with Kate. She clung
to her mother with the persistency of a child who is recovering from an
illness.
Jemima had taken it upon herself to watch the mails, and reported that
there were no letters for Jacqueline. Channing evidently intended to
keep his word implicitly.
Jacqueline had received her mother's explanation of his conduct quite
calmly.
"Let's not discuss it, Mummy," she begged, flushing a little. "Of course
if Mr. Charming was already married, that way, he couldn't ask me to
marry him. I understand." She attempted one little apology for him.
"Geniuses aren't quite--quite like other men, and they ought to be
judged differently, Mummy."
Her sister, who was present at the interview, came over to her here, and
bestowed one of her rare kisses. Pride and dignity always had a strong
appeal for Jemima....
When she had first gone to her mother with her suspicions, Kate was
aghast. "In love with each other, child! Why, that's impossible. Where
have they seen each other? He is an intellectual, sophisticated young
man of the world,--and our Jacky--!"
"The attraction of opposites," Jemima reminded her.
For just one moment, the mother's thoughts were selfish. If Jacqueline
after all did not marry Philip, what would become of her own
vindication, that triumphant answer to the world for which she had so
patiently waited? She put the old plan from her with a sigh.
"Of course Channing would be a good match for little Jacqueline. But I
had hoped," she said, half to herself, "that my child might marry
Philip."
Jemima gave her a queer, quick glance. "You think Philip wants that?"
Kate nodded. "Perhaps he does not know it yet, though."
The girl said haltingly, "I have always thought that Philip was rather
fond of--you, Mother."
"Of me? So he is. Philip has loved me since he was a little boy," she
answered, smiling tenderly. "All the more reason for him to love my
Jacqueline. We are very much alike, only that she is prettier, and
younger--which counts, of course.--But now you say she wants to marry
this Channing."
"I do not say that he wants to marry her."
"Jemmy!"
"Well, why should he?" asked the girl, evenly. "It would not be a good
match for Mr. Channing. His family are conservative Boston people. Can
you imagine Jacky among conservative Boston people? Sliding down
banisters, riding bareback, making eyes at all the men--"
"That is not what you mean," said her mother, rather white about the
lips. "You mean the scandal about me. Yes, that would make a
difference.--You think it is only a flirtation, then?"
"On his part, yes. On Jacqueline's--I don't know. But even flirtation is
not very safe for Jacqueline. Remember her inheritance." Jemima met her
mother's wincing eyes firmly.
"What do you mean?" gasped the older woman.
"I mean--that Jacqueline is oversexed." She had no intention of seeing
her little sister come to grief for lack of frankness. "I know it, and
you know it, and we both know that it is not her fault." She added after
a moment, "I have reason to believe that Mr. Channing is not a marrying
man. There was talk in Lexington--If I were you I should write to
Professor Jim and ask him."
Kate promptly took her advice, with the results that have been seen; and
her respect for the acumen of her elder child became somewhat akin to
awe.
Nor was Jemima at the end of her surprises for her mother.
One morning she followed Kate rather aimlessly into her office; a thing
almost unprecedented, for Mrs. Kildare was rarely disturbed in her
sanctum except upon matters of business.
"You wish to see me about something, daughter?"
"Oh, no, I just wanted to talk."
Kate's heart thumped suddenly. It was a long time since the girl had
sought her out for one of their old confidential chats about nothing in
particular. She had been almost glad of the trouble about Jacqueline
because for the moment it had brought her close again to her other
child. The newly formed alliance was evidently to continue.
She said lightly, "Talk away, then!"
Jemima wandered about the room, examining this thing and that, without
attention. "You've never asked me a question about the visit to Mrs.
Lawton, nor why I came home sooner than I had expected to."
"I did not dare," admitted Kate, smiling a little. "I was afraid the
great experiment had not proved a success."
"Oh, but it was. A great success!--That is not why I came home so soon."
"Why, then?"
Jemima gave a most unexpected answer. "Because I was homesick."
Tears of pure pleasure came into Kate's eyes.
"You see, I'd never been away from home before, and I had no idea how
much I should miss you-all. But people were very kind to me; on
Professor Jim's account, I think."
"Dear old Jim!" said Kate, softly. "He deserves loyal friends, because
he knows so well how to be one.--I have missed him lately. When is he
coming home again?"
"To-day. He will be out to-morrow for supper, as usual."
"Oh, yes, it is Friday, isn't it? What an odd idea, that lecture
tour!--so unlike Jim. He has always been so shy and retiring. I wonder
what made him undertake it?"
"I did," said Jemima.
"You?"
"Why, yes. Some of his lectures seemed to me most unusual, much too good
to waste there in Lexington. So when the opportunity was offered to him
to speak in several other places, I persuaded him to accept it. We went
over the talks together and made them simpler; more popular, you know.
Sometimes he forgets that every audience is not composed of scholars."
Kate stared at her child in amused respect. "Do you mean to say you have
added literary censorship to your various other accomplishments?"
Jemima smiled deprecatingly. "I was glad to be able to help him a
little, after all he has done for us.--Look here, Mother,"--she began to
finger the papers on the desk--"do you care at all for Professor Jim?"
"Of course I do!"
"No--I don't mean that way. I mean--Are you ever going to marry him, do
you think?"
Kate's speechless surprise was sufficient answer.
"Because if you're not,"--the girl cleared her voice--"don't you think
it would be kinder to say so once and for all? You see, if he were sure
you would not have him" (suddenly hot color surged over her face), "he
might want to marry some one else."
"Old Jim marry! Jemima! What are you driving at? What can you mean?"
"I mean--me," gasped the girl, and suddenly turned and fled from the
room.
It took Kate some moments to regain sufficient presence of of mind to
follow her. She found her level-headed daughter face downward among the
pillows of her bed, sobbing most humanly.
Kate sat down beside her and pulled the golden head over into her arms,
where she smoothed and caressed it as she had rarely done since the
girl's babyhood.
"Now tell mother all about it. What put such a strange idea into your
wise little old pate? Not Jim himself--I'm sure of that."
"Oh, no!--But it isn't a strange idea," protested the muffled voice from
her lap. "I don't want to be an old maid--" (sniff, sniff). "He hasn't
asked me yet, exactly--but he would if he were quite sure you didn't
want him--" (sob). "And I'm twenty years old, now. I want to be married,
like other women."
"Only twenty years old!" repeated her mother, gently.
"Oh, I know it sounds young, but it isn't always as young as it sounds"
said the girl with unconscious pathos. "Look at me, Mother--I'm older
than you, right now! I don't believe I ever was very young."
"But you may be yet," said Kate. "With your first lover, your first
baby--Ah, child, child, you _must_ not run the risk of marrying without
love! You don't know what love can do to you."
"Yes, I do," whispered Jemima.
"What! You can't tell me you're in love with old Jim?"
The girl sat erect, and propounded certain decided views of hers on love
and marriage as earnestly as if her little nose were not pink with
embarrassed tears, and her eyes swimming with them like a troubled
baby's.
"Being in love doesn't seem as important to me as it does to some
people. Of course it's necessary, or the world would not go on. There
has to be some sort of glamour to--to make things possible.--But I'm
sure it's not a comfortable feeling to live with, any more than hunger
would be.--Being in love does quite as much harm as good, anyway. Half
the crimes in the world are the result of it, and all the unnecessary
children. I don't want love, Mother! It hurts, and it makes fools of
otherwise intelligent persons. I shouldn't like, ever, to lose my
self-control.--And the feeling doesn't last! Look at you, for instance.
I suppose once you were in love with my father?"
Kate nodded.
"And then in a very little while you were in love with--some one else.
Did it make you any happier, all that loving, or any better? I think
not. Only unhappier, in the long run.--No, no, Mother! I don't want it.
I don't want _any_ emotions!"--She spoke with a queer distaste, the same
fastidious shrinking with which she had often watched Jacqueline
cuddling Mag's baby. "I only want to be safe."
"Marriage isn't always safe, my little girl."
"Mine will be. That's why I've chosen Professor Jim."
Kate made a helpless gesture with her hands. "Child, you don't know what
you're giving up! You can't!"
Jemima swallowed hard. The confession she had to make was not easy.
"Yes, I do. Because I tried love first, to be sure."
"My dear! You--tried love?"
"There was a young man--You remember, Jacqueline called him 'the most
beautiful man in the room'? He was very handsome, and--nice to me.
That's why I went to visit Mrs. Lawton, chiefly. I wanted to see more of
him.--Whenever he touched my hand, or even my dress, little shivers ran
up my back. I--I liked it. That's being in love, isn't it? Sometimes we
went driving, in a buggy. Once it was moonlight, and I knew when we
started that something was going to happen.--I meant it to. I flirted
with him."
"Did you, dear!" murmured the mother, between tears and laughter. "I
didn't suppose you knew how!"
"Oh, those things come, somehow. I've watched Jacky.--After a while, he
kissed me. But do you know, Mother, that was the end of everything! I
stopped having thrills the minute he did it. His mouth was so--so mushy,
and his nose seemed to get in the way.--Still, I went on flirting. I
wanted to give him every chance.--He didn't kiss me again, though. When
we got home I asked him why that was. He said it was because he
respected me too much."
She made a scornful gesture, "You see, it's just as I thought! Kisses
and all that sort of thing have nothing to do with respect, with real
liking. And if my own thrills couldn't outlast one moonlight buggy-ride,
they would not do to marry on. It will be better for me to marry on
respect."
"But poor Jim!" said Kate, unsteadily. "Must he, too, marry on respect?"
Jemima met her gaze candidly. "Why, no. Men are different, I think, even
intellectual ones. He has thrills. I can feel him having them, when I
dance with him. That's how I knew he wanted me. And I'm rather glad of
it," she finished, her voice oddly kind.
Kate at the moment could think of nothing further to say. The thing was
incomprehensible to her, appalling, yet strangely touching. This
twenty-year-old girl, groping her way toward safety, that refuge of the
middle-aged, as eagerly as other young things grasp at happiness, at
romance!--She recalled phrases spoken by another startled mother to
another girl quite as headstrong: "You are only a child! He is twice
your age! You don't _know_!"
She did not give them utterance. What was the use? In this, if in
nothing else, Jemima was her mother's daughter. She would always make
her own decisions.
The girl went on presently to mention various advantages of the proposed
marriage.
"Of course Professor Jim is quite rich--Oh, yes, didn't you know that? I
asked him his income, and he told me. With that, and the money you have
promised me, we can travel and see the world, and keep a good house to
come back to. I could do a good deal for Jacqueline, of course. You will
visit us, too, whenever you like. It may be my only chance of getting
away from Storm, you see. I do not meet many young men, and I'm not the
sort they are apt to marry, anyway."
"Are you so anxious to get away from Storm?" interrupted poor Kate. "You
said you were homesick for us."
"And will be again, often. But that's a weakness one has to get over.
And then, though I have been happy here, I've been unhappy, too. Lonely
and a little--ashamed, lately." She forgot for the moment to whom she
was speaking. Kate had ceased to be a person, was only "mother" to her,
a warm, enfolding comprehension, such as perhaps children are aware of
before they come to the hour of birth.--"Oh, it _will_ be good to live
among people who don't know, who aren't always staring and whispering
behind their hands about us Kildares!" she sighed.
Kate forced herself to say, impartially, "Lexington is not far away. I
am afraid there will always be people there who know about us Kildares,
dear."
"Lexington?" The girl's lip curled. "You don't suppose I shall let my
husband spend the rest of his life in a little place like that! He has
been wasted there too long already, he is a brilliant scholar, Mother,
far more brilliant than people realize, too modest and simple to make
the most of himself. You wait! I'll see to that."
Kate gave up. She lifted her daughter in her arms, and held her close
for a long moment.
"You must do whatever you think best, my girl."
"Yes, Mother. I always do," said Jemima.