THE STORY OF THE LITTLE HUNCH-BACK.

There was in former times at Casgar, upon the utmost borders of

Tartary, a tailor who had a pretty wife, whom he ardently loved,

and by whom he was loved in return. One day, as he sat at work, a

little hunch-back my lord came and sat down at the shop-door,

began singing, at same time playing upon a tabor. The tailor was

pleased to hear him, and had a strong mind to take him to his

house to make his wife merry: This little fellow, said he to his

wife, will divert us both very agreeably. In fine, he invited my

lord, who readily accepted of the invitation; the tailor then

shut up his shop, and conducted him in. The little gentleman

being arrived at the tailor's house, his wife covered the table,

and they sat down to sup on a good large dish of fish; but as

they ate heartily, the little crooked gentleman unluckily

swallowed a large bone, of which he died in a few minutes,

notwithstanding all the tailor and his wife could do to prevent

it. Both were mightily frightened at the accident, especially as

it happened in their house; and there was reason to fear, that if

the justiciary magistrates should hear of it, they would be

punished as assassins. The husband, however, found an expedient

to get rid of the corpse: recollecting that there was a Jewish

doctor who lived just by, he formed a project, to execute which,

his wife and he took the corpse, the one by the feet and the

other by the head, and carried it to the physician's house. They

knocked at the door, from which ascended a steep pair of stairs

to his chamber. As soon as they bad knocked, the servant-maid

came down without any light; and, opening the door, asked what

they wanted. Pr'ythee, go up again, said the tailor, and tell

your master we have brought him a man that is very sick, and

wants his advice. Here, putting a piece of money into her hand,

give him that beforehand, to convince him that we have no mind to

make him lose his labour. While the servant was gone up to

acquaint her master with the welcome news, the tailor and his

wife nimbly conveyed the hunch-backed corpse to the head of the

stairs; and, leaving it there, ran off.

In the mean time, the maid, having told the doctor that a man and

a woman staid for him at the door, desiring he would come down

and look upon a sick man they had brought with them, and the maid

clapping the money she had received into his hand, the doctor was

transported with joy; being paid beforehand, he thought it was a

good job, and should not be neglected. Light, light! cried he to

the maid; follow me nimbly. However, without staying for the

light, he got to the stair-head in such haste, that stumbling

against the corps, he gave it such a kick, as made it tumble down

quiite to the stair-foot, and with difficulty saved himself. A

light, a light! cried he to the maid, quick, quick! at last the

maid came with a light, and he went down stairs with her; but

when he gav that the stumbling-block he had kicked down was a

dead man, he was so frightened, that he invoked Moses, Aaron,

Joshua, and Esdras, and all the other prophets of his law.

Unhappy man that I am! said he, what induced me to come down

without a light? I have e'en made an end of the fellow who was

brought to me to be cured? I am undoubtedly the cause of his

death, and unless, Esras's ass[Footnote: Here the Arabian author

ridicules the Jews: this ass is that which, as the Mahometans

believe, Esdras rode upon when he came from the Babylonian

captivity to Jerusalem.] comes to assist me, I nm ruined: mercy

on me, they will be here instantly, and drag me from my house as

a murderer! But, notwithstanding the perplexity and jeopardy he

was in, he had the precaution to shut his door, lest any one

passing by in the street should observe the mischance, of which

he reckoned himself the author. He then took the corpse into his

wife's chamber, upon which she swooned away. Alas! cried she, we

are utterly ruined! undone! undone! unless we fall upon some

expedient or other to turn the corpse out of our house this

night! Beyond all question, if we harbour it till morning, our

lives must pay for it. What a sad mischance is this! Why, how did

you kill this man? That is not the question, replied the Jew; our

business now is to find out a remedy for such a shocking

accident. They then consulted together how to get rid of the

corpse that night. The doctor racked his brain in vain; he could

not think of any stratagem to get clear: but his wife, who was

more fertile in invention, said, there is a thought come into my

head; let us carry.the corpse to the leads of our house, and

tumble it down the chimney into the house of the Mussulman, our

next neighbour. This Mussulman, or Turk, was one of the sultan's

purveyors for furnishing oil, butter, and all sorts of fat,

tallow, &c. and had a magazine in his house, in which the rats

and mice made prodigious havoe.

The Jewish doctor approving the proposed expedient, his wife and

he took the little hunch-back up to the roof of the house; and,

clapping ropes under his arm-pits, let him down the chimney into

the purveyor's chamber so softly and dexterously, that he stood

upright against the wall as if he had been alive. When they found

he stood firm, they pulled up the ropes, and left the gentleman

in that posture. They were scarcely got into their chamber, when

the purveyor went into his, being just come from a wedding feast,

with a lantern in his hand. He was mightily surprised, when, by

the light of his lantern, he descried a man standing upright in

his chimney; but being a stout man, and apprehending it was a

thief or a robber, he took up a large cane; and, making straight

up to the hunch-back, Ah, said he, I thought it was the rats and

the mice that ate my butter and tallow! and it is you that come

down the chimney to rob me, is it? I question if ever you come

back again on the same errand? This said, he fell foul of the

man, and gave him a good many swinging thwacks with his cane:

upon which the corpse fell down, running its nose against the

ground, and the purveyor redoubled his blows: but, observing that

the body did not move, he stood to consider a little; when,

perceiving it was a corpse, fear succeeded his anger. Wretched

man that I am! said he; what have I done? I have killed a man!

alas, I have carried my revenge too far! good God, unless thou

pityest me, my life is gone! Cursed, ten thousand times accursed,

be the fat and the oil that gave occasion to the commission of so

criminal an action. In fine, he stood pale and thunder-struck; he

thought he saw the officers already come to drag him to condign

punishment, and could not think what resolution to take.

The sultan of Casgar's purveyor did not observe the little

gentleman's hunch when he was beating him, but as soon as he did,

he threw out a thousand imprecations against him. Ah, you crooked

hunch-back! cried he; would to God you had robbed me of all my

fat, and I had not found you here! had it been so, I would not

have been now so much perplexed for the sake of you and your

nasty hunch. Oh! the stars that twinkle in the heavens give light

to none but me in this dangerous Juncture! As soon as he had

uttered these words, he took the little crooked corpse upon his

shoulders, and carried it out of doors to the end of the street,

where he set it upright against a shop, and then trudged home

again without looking behind him.

A few minutes before the break of day, a Christian merchant, who

was very rich, and furnished the sultan's palace with most things

it wanted; this merchant, having sat up all night debauching,

stepped out of his house to go to bathe. Though he was drunk, he

was sensible that the night was far spent, and that the people

would quickly be called to the morning prayers, which begin at

break of day; he therefore quickened his pace to get in time to

the bath, lest a Turk, meeting him in his way to the mosque,

should carry him to prison for a drunkard. When he came to the

end of the street, he stopped on some necessary occasion, and

leaned against the shop where the sultan's purveyor had put the

hunch-backed corpse; but the corpse being jostled, tumbled upon

the merchant's back. The merchant thinking it was a robber that

came to attack him, knocked him down with a hearty box on the

ear, and, after redoubling his blows, cried out, Thieves! The

outcry alarmed the watch, who came up immediately; and finding a

Christian beating a Turk, (for crump-back was of our religion),

What reason have you, said he, to abuse a Mussulman after this

rate? He would have robbed me, replied the merchant, and jumped

upon my back with intent to take me by the throat. If he did,

said the watch, you have revenged yourself sufficiently; come,

get off him. At the same time he stretched out his hand to help

little crump-back up: but observing that he was dead, Ah!

hey-day! said he, is it thus that a Christian dares to

assassinate a Mussulman? So he laid hold of the Christian, and

carried him to the sheriff's house, where he was kept till the

judge was up, and ready to examine him. In the mean time, the

Christian merchant grew sober, and the more he reflected upon his

adventure, the less could he conceive how such single fisty-cuffs

could kill the man. The judge having heard the report of the

watch, and viewed the corpse, which they had taken care to bring

to his house, interrogated the Christian merchant, who could not

deny the crime, though he had not committed it. But the judge

considering that little crump-back belonged to the sultan, (for

he was one of his buffoons) would not put the Christian to death

till he knew the sultan's pleasure. For this end he went to the

palace, and acquainted the sultan with what had happened, and

received from him this answer, I have no mercy to show to a

Christian, who kills a Mussulman; go do your office. Upon this

the judge ordered a gibbet to be erected, and sent criers all

over the city to proclaim that they were about to hang a

Christian for killing a Mussulman.

In fine, the merchant was brought out of gaol to the foot of the

gallows; and the hangman, having put the rope about his neck, was

going to throw him off, when the sultan's purveyor pushed through

die crowd, made up to the gibbet, calling to the hangman to stop,

for that the Christian had not committed the murder, but himself.

The sheriff who attended the execution immediately put

interrogatories to the purveyor, who told him every circumstance

of his killing the little crump-back, and conveying his corpse to

the place where the merchant found him. You were about, added he,

to put to death an innocent person; for how can he be guilty of

the death of a man who was dead before he saw him? My burden is

sufficient in having killed a Turk, without loading my conscience

with the additional charge of the death of a Christian who is not

guilty.

The sultan of Casgar's purveyor having publicly charged himself

with the death of the little hunch-backed man, the sheriff could

not avoid doing justice to the merchant. Let the Christian go,

said he, and hang this man in his room, since it appears by his

own confession that he is guilty. Whereupon the hangman released

the merchant, and clapped the rope round the purveyor's neck; but

just as he was going to pull him up, he heard the voice of the

Jewish doctor, earnestly entreating him to suspend the execution,

and make room for him to throw himself at the foot of the

gallows. When he appeared before the judge, My lord, said he,

this Mussulman you are going to hang is not guilty: the crime

rests with me. Last night a man and a woman, unknown to me, came

to my house with a sick man they had brought along with them; and

knocking at my door, my maid went and opened it without a light,

and received from them a piece of money, with a commission to

come and desire me, in their names, to step down and look upon

the sick person. While she was delivering her message to me, they

conveyed the sick person to the stair-head, and then disappeared.

I went down, without staying for my servant to light a candle,

and in the dark happened to stumble upon the sick person, and

kicked him down stairs. In fine, I saw he was dead, and that it

was the crooked Mussulman, whose death you are now about to

avenge. So my wife and I took the corpse, and, after conveying it

up to the leads of our house, moved it to the roof of the

purveyor's house, our next neighbour, and let it down the chimney

into the chamber. The purveyor, finding it in his house, took the

little man for a thief, and, after beating him, concluded he had

killed him; but that it was not so, you will be convinced by this

my deposition; so that I am the only author of the murder: and

though it was committed undesignedly, I have resolved to expiate

my crime by keeping clear of the charge of the death of two

Mussulmen, and hinder you from executing the sultan's purveyor,

whose innocence I have now revealed. So pray dismiss him, and put

me in his place, for I alone am the cause of the death of the

little man.

The chief justice being persuaded that the Jewish doctor was the

murderer, gave orders to the executioner to seize him, and

release the purveyor. Accordingly the doctor was just going to be

hung up, when the tailor appeared, crying to the executioner to

hold his hand, and make room for him, that he might come and make

his confession to the lord justice; which being done, My lord,

said he to the judge, you have narrowly escaped taking away the

lives of three innocent persons, but if you will have patience to

hear me, I will discover to you the real murderer of the

crook-backed man. If his death is to be expiated by another, that

must be mine. Yesterday evening, as I was at work in my shop, and

pretty merry, the little hunch-back came to my door half drunk,

and sat down before it. He began to sing, so I invited him to

pass the evening at my house. Accordingly, he accepted of the

invitation, and went with me. We sat down to supper, and I gave

him a plate of fish; but, in eating, a bone stuck in his throat;

and though my wife and I did our utmost to relieve him, he died

in a few minutes. His death affected us extremely; and from fear

of being charged with it, we carried the corpse to the Jewish

doctor's house, and knocked at the door. The maid coming down and

opening it, I desired her to go up forthwith, and ask her master

to come down and give his advice to a sick person that we had

brought along with us; and withal, to encourage him, I charged

her to give him a piece of money, which I put into her hand. When

she was gone up, I carried hunch-back up stairs, laid him upon

the uppermost step, and then my wife and I made the best of our

way home. The doctor, in coming down, kicked the corpse down

stairs, and thereupon he supposed himself to be the author of his

death. Now, this being the case, continued he, release the

doctor, and let me die in his room.

The chief justice, and all the spectators, could not sufficiently

admire the strange emergencies that ensued upon the death of the

little crooked gentleman. Let the Jewish doctor go, said the

judge, and hang up the tailor, since he confesses the crime. It

is certain this history is very uncommon, and deserves to be

recorded in letters of gold. The executioner having dismissed the

doctor, made every thing ready to tie up the tailor. While the

executioner was making ready to hang up the tailor, the sultan of

Casgar, wanting the company of his crooked jester, asked where he

was. One of his officers answered, The hunch-back, sir, whom you

inquire after, got drunk last night, and, contrary to his custom,

slipped out of the palace, went a sauntering into the city, and

was this morning found dead. A man was brought before the chief

justice, and charged with the murder of him; but as he was going

to be hanged, up came a man, and after him another, who took the

charge upon themselves, and cleared each other. The examination

has continued a long while, and the judge is now interrogating a

third man who avows himself the real author of the murder.

Upon this intelligence, the sultan of Casgar sent a hussar to the

place of execution. Go, said he to the messenger, make all the

haste you can, bring the arraigned persons before me immediately,

with the corpse of poor crump-back, that I may see him once more.

Accordingly the hussar went, and happened to arrive at the place

of execution at the time when the executioner was going to tie up

the tailor. He cried aloud to the executioner to suspend the

execution. The hangman, knowing the hussar, did not dare to

proceed, but untied the tailor; and then the hussar acquainted

the judge with the sultan's pleasure. The judge obeyed, and went

straight to the palace, accompanied by the tailor, the Jewish

doctor, and the Christian merchant; causing four of his men to

carry the hunch corpse along with him. The judge, on appearing

before the sultan, threw himself at the prince's feet, and, after

recovering himself, gave him a faithful relation of what he knew

of the story of the crump-backed man. The sultan found the story

so uncommon, that he ordered his private historians to write it

with all its circumstances. Then addressing himself to the

audience, Did you ever hear, said he, such a surprising story as

has happened on account of my little crooked buffoon? The

Christian merchant then, after falling down, and saluting the

earth with his forehead, spoke in the following manner: Most

puisant monarch, said he, I know a story even more astonishing

than that you have now spoken off; and if your majesty will give

me leave, I will tell it you. The circumstances are such, that

nobody can hear them without being moved. Well, said the sultan,

I give you leave; and the merchant went on as follows.