‘The Just Devil of Woodstock’--Metrical Version--Presumed Genuine
History of ‘The Just Devil of Woodstock.’
THE JUST DEVIL OF WOODSTOCK.[5]
‘The 16 day of _October_ in the year of our Lord 1649, The Commissioners
for surveying and valuing his Majesties Mannor House, Parks, Woods, Deer,
Demesnes, and all things thereunto belonging, by Name Captain _Crook_,
Capt. _Hart_, Capt. _Cockaine_, Capt. _Carelesse_, and Capt. _Roe_ their
Messenger, with Mr. _Brown_ their Secretary, and two or three servants,
went from _Woodstock_ town (where they had lain some nights before) and
took up their lodgings in his Majesties House, after this manner: The
Bedchamber and withdrawing room, they both lodged in, and made their
Kitchin; the Presence Chamber their room for dispatch of business with all
commers: of the Councel Hall, their Brewhouse, as of the Dining room,
their Woodhouse, where they laid in the clefts, of that antient standard
in the High-Park, for many ages beyond memory, known by the Name of the
Kings Oak, which they had chosen out, and caused to be dug up by the
Roots.
‘_Octob. 17._ About the middle of the night, these new guests were first
awaked, by a knocking at the Presence Chamber door, which they also
conceived did open, and something to enter, which came through the room,
and also walkt through the withdrawing room into the Bed chamber, and
there walkt about that room with a heavy step during half an hour; then
crept under the bed where Captain _Hart_, and Capt. _Carelesse_ lay, where
it did seeme (as it were) to bite and gnaw the Mat and Bed-coards, as if
it would tear and rend the feather beds, which having done a while, then
would they heave a while, and rest; then heave them up again in the bed
more high than it did before, sometime on the one side, sometime on the
other, as if it had tried which Captain was heaviest; thus having heaved
for some half an hour, from thence it walkt out, and went under the
servants’ bed, and did the like to them; thence it walkt into a
withdrawing room, and there did the same to all who lodged there: Thus
having welcomed them for more than two hours space, it walked out as it
came in, and shut the outer door again, but with a clap of some mightie
force; these guests were in a sweat all this while, but out of it falling
into a sleep again, it became morning first before they spoke their minds,
then would they have it to be a Dog, yet they described it more to the
likenesse of a great Bear, so fell to examining under the Beds, where
finding only the Mats scratcht, but the Bed-coards whole, and the
quarters of Beef which lay on the floor untoucht, they entertained other
thoughts.
‘_Octob. 18._ They were all awaked, as the night before, and now conceived
that they heard all the great clefts of the Kings Oak brought into the
Presence Chamber, and there thumpt down, and, after, roul about the room;
they could hear their chairs and stools tost from one side of the room
unto the other; and then (as it were) altogether jostled; thus having done
an hour together, it walkt into the withdrawing room, where lodged the two
Captains, the Secretary, and two servants; here stopt the thing a while,
as if it did take breath, but raised a hideous tone, then walkt into the
Bed-chamber, where lay those as before, and under the Bed it went, where
it did heave, and heave again, that now they in bed were put to catch hold
upon Bed-posts, and sometimes one of the other, to prevent their being
tumbled out upon the ground; then coming out as from under the bed, and
taking hold upon the bed-posts, it would shake the whole bed, almost as if
a cradle rocked; Thus, having done here for half an hour, it went into the
withdrawing room, where first it came and stood at the bed’s feet, and
heaving up the bed’s feet, flopt down again a while, until at last it
heaved the feet so high, that those in bed thought to have been set upon
their heads, and having thus for two hours entertained them, went out as
in the night before, but with a great noise.
‘_Octob. 19._ This night they awaked, not until the midst of the night,
they perceived the room to shake, with something that walkt about the
bed-chamber, which, having done so for a while, it walkt into a
withdrawing room, where it took up a Brasse warming-pan, and returning
with it into the bed-chamber, therein made so loud a noise, in these
Captains’ own words, it was as loud and scurvie as a ring of five untuned
Bells rang backward, but the Captains, not to seem afraid, next day made
mirth of what had past, and jested at the Devil in the pan.
‘_Octob. 20._ These Captains and their Company, still lodging as before,
were wakened in this night with some things flying about the rooms, and
out of one room into the other, as thrown with some great force: Captain
_Hart_ being in a slumber, was taken by the shoulder and shaked until he
did sit up in his bed, thinking that it had been by one of his fellows,
when suddenly he was taken on the Pate with a Trencher, that it made him
shrink down into the bed-clothes, and all of them, in both rooms, kept
their heads, at least, within their sheets, so fiercely did three dozen of
Trenchers, fly about the rooms; yet Captain _Hart_ ventured again to peep
out to see what was the matter, and what it was that threw, but then the
Trenchers came so fast and neer about his ears, that he was fain to couch
again: In the morning they found all their Trenchers, Pots and Spits, upon
and about the rooms; this night there was also in several parts of the
room, and outer rooms, such noises of beating at doors, and on the Walls,
as if that several Smiths had been at work; and yet our Captains shrunk
not from their work, but went on in that, and lodged as they had done
before.
‘_Octob. 21._ About midnight, they heard great knocking at every door,
after a while, the doors flew open, and into the withdrawing room entred
something, as of a very mighty proportion, the figure of it they knew not
how to describe; this walkt a while about the room, shaking the floor at
every step, then came it close to the bed side, where lay Captains _Crook_
and _Carelesse_; and, after a little pause, as it were, The bed-curtains,
both at sides and feet, were drawn up and down, slowly, then faster again
for a quarter of an hour, then from end to end as fast as imagination
could fancie the running of the rings, then shaked it the beds, as if the
joints thereof had crackt; then walkt the thing into the bed-chamber, and
so plaied with those beds there: Then took up eight Pewter-dishes, and
bouled them about the room, and over the servants in the truckle beds;
then sometimes were the dishes taken up, and throwne crosse the high beds,
and against the walls, and so much battered; but there were more dishes
wherein was meat in the same room, that were not at all removed: During
this, in the Presence Chamber there was stranger noise of weightie things
thrown down, and as they supposed, the clefts of the King’s Oak did roul
about the room, yet at the wonted hour went away, and left them to take
rest, such as they could.
‘_October 22._ Hath mist of being set down, the Officers imployed in their
work farther off, came not that day to _Woodstock_.
‘_October 23._ Those that lodged in the withdrawing room, in the midst of
the night were awakened with the cracking of fire, as if it had been with
thorns and sparks of fire burning, whereupon they supposed that the bed
chamber had taken fire, and, listening to it farther, they heard their
fellows in bed sadly groan, which gave them to suppose they might be
suffocated, wherefore they call’d upon their servants to make all possible
hast to help them; when the two servants were come in, they found all
asleep, and so brought back word, but that there were no bedclothes upon
them, wherefore they were sent back to cover them, and to stir up and mend
the fire; when the servants had covered them, and were come to the
chimney, in the corners they found their wearing apparel, boots and
stockings, but they had no sooner toucht the Embers, when the firebrands
flew about their ears so fast, that away ran they into the other room, for
the shelter of their cover-lids, then after them walkt something that
stampt about the room, as if it had been exceeding angry, and likewise
threw about the Trenchers, Platters, and all such things in the room;
after two hours went out, yet stampt again over their heads.
‘_October 24._ They lodged all abroad.
‘_October 25._ This afternoon came unto them Mr. _Richard Crook_, the
Lawyer, brother to Captain Crook, and now Deputy-Steward of the Mannor,
unto Captain _Parsons_, and Major _Butler_, who had put out Mr. Hyans his
Majesties Officer: To entertain this new guest the Commissioners caused a
very great fire to be made, of neere the chimney full of wood, of the
King’s Oak, and he was lodged in the withdrawing room with his brother,
and his servant in the same room: about the midst of the night a wonderful
knocking was heard, and into the room something did rush, which, coming to
the chimney side, dasht out the fire, as with the stamp of some prodigious
foot, then threw down such weighty stuffe, what ere it was (they took it
to be the residue of the clefts and roots of the King’s Oak) close by the
bed side, that the house and bed shook with it. Captain _Cockain_ and his
fellow arose and took their swords to go unto the _Crooks_, the noise
ceased at their rising, so that they came to the door, and called; the two
brothers, though fully awaked, and heard them call, were so amazed, that
they made no answer, untill Captain _Cockaine_ had recovered the boldness
to call very loud, and came unto their bed-side; then, faintly first,
after some more assurance, they came to understand one another, and
comforted the lawyer: Whilst this was thus, no noise was heard, which made
them think the time was past of that nights troubles, so that, after some
little conference, they applied themselves to take some rest. When Captain
_Cockaine_ was come to his own bed, which he had left open, he found it
closely covered, which he much wondered at, but turning the clothes down,
and opening it to get in, he found the lower sheet strewed over with
trenchers, their whole three dozens of trenchers were orderly disposed
between his sheets, which he and his fellow endeavouring to cast out, such
noise arose about the room, that they were glad to get into bed with some
of the trenchers; the noise lasted a full half hour after this. This
entertainment so ill did like the Lawyer, and being not so well studied in
the point, as to resolve this the Devil’s Law-case, that he, next day,
resolved to begone, but, not having dispatcht all that he came for, profit
and perswasions prevailed with him to stay the other hearing, so that he
lodged as he did the night before.
‘_Octob. 26._ This night each room was better furnished with fire and
candle than before; yet about twelve at night came something in, that
dasht all out, then did walk about the room, making a noise, not to be set
forth by the comparison with any other thing, sometimes came it to the
bed-sides, and drew the Curtains to and fro, then twerle them, then walk
about again, and return to the bed-posts, shake them with all the bed, so
that they in bed were put to hold one upon the other; then walk about the
room again, and come to the servants bed, and gnaw the wainscot head--and
shake altogether in that room; at the time of this being in doing, they in
the bed-chamber heard such strange dropping down from the roof of the
room, that they supposed ’twas like the fall of money by the sound.
Captain _Cockaine_ not frighted with so small a noise (and lying near the
chimney) stept out, and made shift to light a candle, by the light of
which he perceived the room strewed over with broken glass, green, and
some as it were pieces of broken bottles. He had not long been considering
what it was, when suddainly his candle was hit out, and glass flew about
the room, that he made haste to the protection of the Coverlets, the noise
of thundering rose more hideous than at any time before; yet, at a certain
time, all vanisht into calmness. The morning after, was the glass about
the room, which the maid, that was to make clean the rooms, swept up into
a corner, and many came to see it. But Mr. _Richard Crooke_ would stay no
longer, yet as he stopt, going through _Woodstock_ Town, he was there
heard to say, that he would not lodge amongst them another night, for a
Fee of £500.
‘_Octob. 27._ The Commissioners had not yet done their work, wherefore
they must stay, and, being all men of the sword, they must not seem afraid
to encounter with anything, though it be the Devill, therefore, with
pistols charged, and drawn swords laied by their bed sides, they applied
themselves to take some rest, when something, in the midst of night, so
opened and shut the window casements, with such claps, that it awakened
all that slept; some of them peeping out to look what was the matter with
the windows, stones flew about the rooms as if hurled with many hands;
some hit the walls, and some the bed’s head close above the pillows; the
dints of which were then, and yet (it is conceived) are to be seen, thus
sometime throwing stones; and sometime making thundering noise; for two
hours space it ceast, and all was quiet till the morn. After their rising,
and the maid come in to make the fire, they looked about the rooms; they
found fourscore stones brought in that night, and, going to lay them
together, in the corner, where the glass (before mentioned) had been
swept up, they found that every piece of glass had been carried away that
night: many people came next day to see the stones, and all observed that
they were not of such kind of stones as are naturall in the countrey
thereabout; with these were noises like claps of thunder, or report of
Cannon planted against the rooms; heard by all that lodged in the outer
courts, to their astonishment; and at _Woodstock_ Town, taken to be
thunder.
‘_Octob. 28._ This night, both strange and differing noise from the
former, first wakened Captain _Hart_ who lodged in the bed-chamber, who
hearing _Roe_ and _Brown_ to groan, called out to _Cockaine_ and _Crooke_
to come and help them, for _Hart_ could not now stir himself. Cockaine
would faine have answered, but he could not, or look about, something he
thought, stopt both his breath and held down his eye lids. Amazed thus, he
struggled and kickt about, till he had awaked Captain _Crook_, who, half
asleep, grew very angry at his kicks, and multiplied words till it grew to
an appointment in the field: but this fully recovered _Cockaine_ to
remember that Captain _Hart_ had called for help, wherefore to them he ran
in the other room, whom he found sadly groaning: where scraping in the
chimney he found a candle and fire to light it; but had not gone two
steps, when something blew the candle out, and threw him in the chair by
the bed side, when presently cried out Captain _Careless_, with a most
pittiful voice, Come hither, O come hither, brother _Cockaine_, the
thing’s gone off me. _Cockaine_ scarce yet himself, helpt to set him up
in his bed, and, after, Captain _Hart_; and having scarce done that to
them, and also to the other two, they heard Captain _Crook_ crying out, as
if something had been killing him; _Cockaine_ snacht up the sword that lay
by their bed, and ran into the room to save _Crook_, but was in much more
likelyhood to kill him, for at his coming the thing that pressed _Crook_,
went off him, at which _Crook_ started out of his bed, when _Cockaine_
thought a spirit made at him, at which _Crook_ cried out Lord help, Lord
save me; _Cockaine_ let fall his hand, and _Crook_ embracing _Cockaine_
desired his reconcilement: giving him many thanks for his deliverance,
then rose they all and came together, discoursed sometimes godly, and
sometimes praied, for all this while was there such stamping over the roof
of the house, as if 1,000 horse had there been trotting. This night, all
the stones brought in the night before, and laid up in the withdrawing
room, were all carried away again by that which brought them in, which at
the wonted time, left off, and, as it were, went out, and so away.
‘_Octob. 29._ Their businesse having now received so much forwardnesse, as
to be neer dispatcht, they encouraged one the other, and resolved to try
further, therefore they provided more lights and fires, and further, for
their assistance, prevailed with their Ordinary Keeper to lodge amongst
them, and bring his Mastive Bitch, and it was so this night with them,
that they had no disturbance at all.
‘_Octob. 30._ So well had they past the night before, that this night they
went to bed confident and carelesse, untill, about 12 of the clock,
something knockt at the door as with a smith’s great hammer, but with such
force as if it had cleft the door; then entred something like a Bear, but
seem’d to swell more big and walkt about the room, and out of one room
into the other; treading so heavily, as the floore had not been strong
enough to bear it; when it came to the bed chamber, it dasht against the
beds heads some kind of glasse vessell, that broke in sundry pieces; and,
sometimes, it would take up those pieces, and hurle them about the room,
and into the other room; and when it did not hurle the glasse at their
heads, it did strike upon the tables as if many smiths, with their
greatest hammers, had been laying on as upon an anvill: sometimes it
thumpt against the walls, as if it would beat a hole through; then upon
their heads such stamping, as if the roof of the house were beating down
upon their heads, and, having done thus during the space (as was
conjectured) of two hours, it ceased and vanished, but with a more fierce
shutting of the doors than at any time before. In the morning they found
the pieces of glass about the room, and observed that it was much
differing from that glasse, brought in three nights before, this being of
a much thicker substance, which severall persons which came in carried
away some pieces of. The Commissioners were in debate of lodging there no
more, but all their businesse was not done, and some of them were so
conceited as to believe, and to attribute the rest they enjoyed the night
before this last unto the Mastive bitch; wherefore they resolved to get
more company, and the Mastive bitch, and try another night.
‘_Octob. 31._ This night, the fires and lights prepared, the Ordinary
Keeper and his bitch, with another man persuaded by him, they all took
their beds, and fell asleep. But, about 12 at night, such rapping was on
all sides of them, that it wakened all of them. As the doors did seem to
open, the Mastive bitch fell fearfully a yelling, and presently ran
fiercely into the bed to them in the truckle bed. As the thing came by the
table, it struck so fierce a blow on that, as that it made the frame to
crack; then took the warming pan from off the table and stroke it against
the walls with so much force as that it was beat flat together, lid and
bottom; now were they hit as they lay covered over head and ears within
the bedclothes; Captain _Carelesse_ was taken a sound blow on the head
with the shoulder blade-bone of a dead Horse (before, they had been but
thrown at when they peept up, and mist,) Brown had a shrewd blow on the
leg with the back bone, and another on the head; and everyone of them felt
severall blows of bones and stones through the bed clothes, for now these
things were thrown as from an angry hand that meant further mischief; the
stones flew in at the window as if shot out of a Gun, nor was the bursts
lesse (as from without) than of a Cannon, and all the windows broken down.
Now, as the hurling of the things did cease, and the thing walkt up and
down, Captains _Cockaine_ and _Hart_ cried out, _In the Name of the
Father, Son and Holy Ghost, What are you? what would you have? what have
we done that you disturb us thus?_ No voice replied (as the Captains said,
yet some of their servants have said otherwise) and the noise ceast.
Hereupon Captains _Hart_ and _Cockaine_ rose, who lay in the Bed-chamber,
renewed the fire and lights, and one great candle in a candlestick they
placed in the door, that might be seen by them in both the rooms; no
sooner were they got to bed, but the noise arose on all sides more loud
and hideous than at any time before, in so much (as to use the Captain’s
own words) it returned and brought seven Devils worse than itself; and,
presently, they saw the candle and candlestick in the passage of the door,
dasht up to the roof of the room, by a kick of the hinder parts of a
Horse, and after, with the Hoof trod out the snuffe, and so dasht out the
Fire in the Chimnies. As this was done, there fell, as from the sieling,
upon them in the Truckle beds, such quantities of water, as if it had been
poured out of Buckets, which stunk worse than any earthly stink could
make. And, as this was in doing, something crept under the High Beds, tost
them up to the roof of the House, with the Commissioners in them, until
the Testers of the Beds were beaten down upon them, and the Bedsted-frames
broke under them. And here, some pause being made, they all, as if with
one consent, started up, and ran down the stairs until they came into the
Counsel-Hall, where two sate up a Brewing, but were now fallen asleep;
those they scared much with wakening of them, having been much perplext
before with the strange noise, which commonly was taken by them abroad
for thunder, sometimes for rumbling wind; here the Captains and their
company got fire and candle, and everyone carrying something of either,
they returned into the Presence-Chamber, where some applied themselves to
make the fire, whilst others fell to Prayers, and, having got some clothes
about them, they spent the residue of the night in singing Psalms and
Prayers; during which, no noise was in that room, but most hideously round
about, as at some distance.
‘It should have been told before, how that when Captain _Hare_ first rose
this night (who lay in the Bed-Chamber next the fire) he found their Book
of valuations crosse the embers smoaking, which he snacht up, and cast
upon the Table there, which, the night before, was left upon the Table in
the presence, amongst their other papers. This Book was, in the morning,
found a handful burnt, and had burnt the Table where it lay; _Brown_ the
Clerk said, he would not for a 100 and a 100l. that it had been burnt a
handful further.
‘This night it happened that there were six Cony-stealers, who were come
with their Nets and Ferrets to the Cony-burrows by _Rosamond’s_ Well, but
with the noise this night from the Mannor-house, they were so terrified,
that, like men distracted, away they ran, and left their Haies all ready
pitched, ready up, and the Ferrets in the Cony-burrows.
‘Now the Commissioners, more sensible of their danger, considered more
seriously of their safety, and agreed to go and confer with Mr. _Hoffman_,
the Minister of _Wotton_ (a man not of the meanest note for life or
learning, by some esteemed more high) to desire his advice, together with
his company and prayers. Mr. _Hoffman_ held it too high a point to resolve
on suddenly and by himself, wherefore, desired time to consider upon it,
which, being agreed unto, he forthwith rode to Mr. _Jenkinson_ and Mr.
_Wheat_, the two next Justices of Peace, to try what Warrant they could
give him for it. They both (as ’tis said from themselves) encouraged him
to be assisting to the Commissioners, according to his calling.
[Sidenote: _By which it is to be noted that a Presbyterian Minister dares
not encounter an Independent Devil._]
‘But certain it is, that when they came to fetch him to go with them, Mr.
_Hoffman_ answered, That he would not lodge there one night, for £500, and
being askt to pray with them, he held up his hands, and said, That he
would not meddle upon any terms.
‘Mr. _Hoffman_ refusing to undertake the quarrel, the Commissioners held
it not safe to lodge where they had been thus entertained, any longer, but
caused all things to be removed into the Chambers over the Gatehouse,
where they staid but one night, and what rest they enjoyed there, we have
but an uncertain relation of, for they went away early the next morning;
but if it may be held fit to set down what hath been delivered by the
report of others, they were also the same night much affrighted with
dreadful apparitions; but, observing that these passages spread much in
discourse, to be also in particulars taken notice of, and that the nature
of it made not for their cause, they agreed to the concealing of the
things for the future; yet this is well known and certain, that the
Gate-keeper’s wife was in so strange an agony in her bed, and in her
bed-chamber such noise (whilst her husband was above with the
Commissioners) that two maids in the next room to her durst not venture to
assist her, but, affrighted, ran out to call company, and their Master,
and found the woman (at their coming in) gasping for breath: and the next
day said that she saw and suffered that, which, for all the world, she
would not be hired to again.
From _Woodstock_ the Commissioners removed unto _Euelme_, and some of them
returned to _Woodstock_, the Sunday sennight after (the Book of
_Valuations_ wanting something that was, for haste, left imperfect), but
lodged not in any of those rooms where they had lain before, and yet were
not unvisited (as they confess themselves) by the Devil, whom they called
their nightly guest. Captain _Crooke_ came not untill _Tuesday_ night, and
how he sped that night, the gate-keeper’s wife can tell, if she dareth;
but, what she hath whispered to her gossips, shall not be made a part of
this our Narrative, nor any more particulars which have fallen from the
Commissioners themselves, and their servants to other persons; they are
all, or most of them alive, and may add to it when they please, and,
surely, have not a better way to be revenged of him who troubled them,
than according to the Proverb, tell truth and shame the Devil.
There remains this observation to be added, that on a Wednesday morning,
all these Officers went away; And that, since then, diverse persons of
severall qualities, have lodged often and sometimes long in the same rooms
both in the presence, withdrawing room and bed Chamber belonging unto his
Sacred Majesty, yet none have had the least disturbance, or heard the
smallest noise, for which the cause was not as ordinary, as apparent;
except the Commissioners and their company, who came in order to the
alienating and pulling down the house, which is well nigh performed.’
As to the authenticity of the above, we are told in the Preface: ‘And now,
as to the Penman of this Narrative, know that he was a Divine, and, at the
time of those things acted, which are here related, the Minister and
Schoolmaster of _Woodstock_, a person learned and discreet, nor byassed
with factious humours, his name _Widows_, who, each day, put in writing
what he heard from their mouthes, (and such things as they told to have
befallen them the night before), therein keeping to their own words.’
There was also a metrical account[6] of these strange doings, printed in
the year in which they occurred; but although it exactly tallies with the
prose as above, it is not written in so refined a strain.
The _British Magazine_ for April, 1747 (vol. ii., p. 156) professes to
give ‘The genuine history of the good devil of _Woodstock_, famous in the
world in the year 1649, and never accounted for, or at all understood to
this time.’ It is by an anonymous writer, who says he found it in some
original papers which had lately fallen into his hands, ‘under the name of
authentick memoirs of the memorable _Joseph Collins_ of Oxford, commonly
known by the name of _funny Joe_,’ and it puts forth that this said Joe,
under the name of Giles Sharp, entered the service of the Commissioners as
a servant, and with the help of two friends, an unknown trap-door in the
ceiling of the bedchamber, and some fulminating mercury, played the part
of the Devil; but as the document is not known to be in existence, and is
only mentioned in the pages of a magazine a hundred years afterwards, the
reader may attach whatever credit he pleases to it. At all events, it
proves that something very extraordinary, according to popular rumour, did
take place at Woodstock during the Commissioners’ occupation.