DAUGHTERS.

CARDS. The card of the eldest daughter in

society is simply Miss Wilson, and upon her

death or marriage the card of the next

daughter becomes the same. Where there

are unmarried aunts and cousins having the

father's name, only the eldest daughter of

the eldest man can use the form Miss Wilson.

If two or more sisters enter society at

about the same time, their names may appear

on their mother's card as The Misses Wilson.

The name of the younger daughter should

appear in full on her mother's card--as, Miss

Mary Jane Wilson.

Until the younger daughter has formally,

made her debut, she visits only intimate

friends of the family. After her debut she

has no card, and her full baptismal name

appears on her mother's card, beneath her

name, and not until a year or two after her

first appearance does she have a card of her

own.

When a mother leaves her daughter's card,

it is for the hostess only.

If reception days appear on the mother's

card, the daughters also receive on that day,

as they have no reception date of their

own.

After an entertainment the cards of the

family may be left for the host and hostess

by the eldest daughter.

The eldest daughter has her own circle of

acquaintances, and can visit and receive independently

of her mother.

DUTIES AT BALLS. See BALLS--DUTIES OF

DAUGHTERS.

DAUGHTER OF BARON--HOW ADDRESSED. An official

letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the

honor to remain, Madam, your obedient servant.

A social letter begins: Dear Miss Wilson,

and ends: Believe me, I remain sincerely yours.

The envelope addressed to the eldest

daughter reads: To the Honorable Miss Wilson,

but to a younger daughter: To the

Honorable Minnie Wilson.

DAUGHTER OF DUKE--HOW ADDRESSED. An official

letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the

honor to remain your Ladyship's most obedient

servant.

The address on the envelope is: To the

Right Honorable the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

A social letter begins: Dear Lady Jane,

and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Jane, very

faithfully yours.

The address is: To the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

DAUGHTERS OF EARL--HOW ADDRESSED. An official

letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the

honor to remain your Ladyship's most obedient

servant.

The address on the envelope is: To the

Right Honorable the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

A social letter begins: Dear Lady Jane,

and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Jane, very

faithfully yours.

The address is: To the Lady Jane F.

Wilson.

DAUGHTER OF MARQUIS--HOW ADDRESSED. An official

letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the

honor to remain your Ladyship's most obedient

servant.

The address on the envelope is: To the

Right Honorable the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

A social letter begins: Dear Lady Jane,

and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Jane, very

faithfully yours.

The address is: To the Lady Jane F.

Wilson.

DAUGHTER OF VISCOUNT--HOW ADDRESSED. An official

letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the

honor to remain, madam, your obedient servant.

A social letter begins: Dear Miss Wilson,

and ends: Believe me, Miss Wilson, sincerely

yours.

The envelope addressed to the eldest

daughter would read: To the Honorable Miss

Wilson, but to a younger daughter: To the

Honorable Minnie Wilson.

DAYS AT HOME. Only very intimate persons should

call on any other days than those named on

an At Home card.

DAY OF WEDDING. The wedding-day is named by

the bride, and her mother's approval is asked

by the groom.

DEATH IN THE FAMILY. Cards, writing-paper, and envelopes

should be bordered in black. The

announcement of the death may be printed

or engraved, preferably the latter. Full

name of deceased, together with date of

birth and death, and residence, should be

given.

The frequenting of places of amusements,

entertainments, or social functions should

not be indulged in for at least a year if in

mourning for near relatives.

CONDOLENCE. After a death in the family of an

acquaintance, a card with the word Condolence

written on it should be left in person

or by messenger. For very intimate acquaintances,

cut flowers may be left in person

or sent, together with a card or letter, unless

request has been made not to do so.

DEBUTANTE. A debutante should make her debut between

the ages of seventeen and twenty, and

should not appear at any public function before

her debut. She should be thoroughly

versed in the laws of good society. She

should be extremely cautious at all times in

her dealings with men. She should follow,

without reserve, the advice of mother or

chaperone. She should avoid forwardness,

and be quiet in manner and in speech. Men

acquaintances should be carefully chosen, and

great care exercised in accepting invitations

from them.

AFTERNOON TEAS (FORMAL). When a tea is

given in honor of a debutante, she stands beside

the hostess (usually her mother), and

each guest is introduced to her. Flowers

should be liberally provided, and friends may

contribute on such an occasion.

A debutante should not make any

formal visits alone the first year, and should

not receive men visitors unless her chaperone

is present. Should a man call during

the first season, and neither her mother

nor her chaperone be present, she should decline

the visit. She may make and receive

visitors alone the second season.

When calling upon a debutante, men and

women should leave cards for her and her

mother.

CARDS. A debutante should use her mother's

card with her name engraved under her

mother's, but after a season she uses her own

card. Personal cards should not be used

during the first season. If she is the eldest

unmarried daughter, her name is engraved

(as, Miss A--) beneath her mother's name,

but if there are other sisters, with the initials

(as, Miss A. A--).

The cards of a debutante may be sent by

mail or messenger.

DANCES. A debutante always receives with her

mother standing by her side. A good order

is for the mother to stand nearest the door,

the debutante next, and the father last.

It is a good plan for the debutante to ask

a few of her girl friends to stand beside her

the first half hour.

The mother should introduce guests to her

daughter, who may introduce them to her

friends.

The debutante shakes hands with each one

introduced to her. She dances every dance,

and at the end stands beside her mother to

receive the greetings of the guests.

The girls standing up with the debutante

after the first hour are free to dance and enjoy

themselves as they please without standing

in line again.

MEN. Her mother should select in advance the

man who is to have the pleasure of the first

dance with the debutante at her debut. No

man should dance more than once with the

debutante. If well acquainted with the

family, a man may send flowers to a debutante

at the time of her first debut. A man

should make a formal call on mother and

daughter a day or two after her debut, and,

if unable to do so, he should send a card.

DEBUT. When her mother receives visits after

her debut, the daughter is included, and

should be present. The mother should keep

a complete record of the visits made by entering

the cards in a book kept for that purpose.

FLOWERS. Friends should send flowers to a debutante

at a formal tea given in her honor.

MEN. When calling upon a debutante, a man

should leave cards for her and her mother,

whether the entertainment was attended or

not.

See also DEBUTS.

DEBUTS. A debut may be made at a dinner,

reception, or ball. The debutante's card

should be enclosed with the invitation, reading:

Miss Wilson; or, if a younger daughter,

Miss Minnie Wilson. For an "At

Home" debut, the least formal of all these

entertainments, the name of the debutante is

engraved below that of her mother.

The mother and elder unmarried sisters

prior to the debut should call formally upon

those whom they wish to invite to the ceremony.

Cards of the family are left, including

those of father and brothers.

BALLS--INVITATIONS. When a young woman is

to be introduced into society by a ball given

in her honor, the parents may use a Mr. and

Mrs. calling card, with the words added in

writing: Dancing at ten o'clock, with card of

the debutante enclosed.

Or the parents may use a specially engraved

invitation.

CARDS, LEAVING. At the entertainments at a

debut, as at a supper, cards should be left for

the mother and daughter, and if guests are

unable to be present, they should send them

the day of the entertainment.

ENTERTAINMENTS. Debuts may be an "At

Home," supper, or dinner, the latter being

more formal, and only intimate friends being

invited. When making her debut, the debutante

should stand beside her mother in the

drawing-room, near the door, and be introduced

by her. On formal occasions the

father stands with them. The debutante

may receive flowers from intimate friends

only.

AT HOMES. These are the least formal.

SUPPERS OR DINNERS. If the debut takes the

form of a supper or dinner, the brother takes

in the debutante, and the father the most

distinguished woman; or, if there is no

brother, he takes in the debutante himself,

and she is seated at his left hand. The

mother is escorted by the most distinguished

man.

Should dancing follow, the mother should

select the first partner, who dances but once,

when others are at liberty to follow.

GUESTS. Guests should offer congratulations to

a debutante at her debut in a few well-chosen

words, and also to the parents. A few

moments of conversation with her only is admissible.

INVITATIONS. Invitations are engraved, and

should be sent by mail or messenger two

weeks in advance, addressed to Mr. and Mrs.

A, or Mrs. B, or The Misses A. While the

invitations to a family may be enclosed in

one envelope and sent to the principal one

of the family, the son of the family should

receive a separate invitation. Men should

receive separate invitations and acknowledge

them, in person.

Acknowledgment is mot necessary for an

"At Home" debut occurring in the afternoon,

but would be for a formal one in the

evening, for which special engraved invitations

had been sent.

If invitations for an afternoon "At Home"

reception are accepted, cards should be left

for mother and daughter. And, if not attending,

cards should be sent by mail or

messenger.

DIAMOND WEDDINGS. These occur after seventy-

five years of married life, and naturally are

of very rare occurrence. If they are celebrated,

the invitation may bear the words:

NO PRESENTS RECEIVED, and congratulations

may be extended in accepting or declining

the invitation. An entertainment should be

provided for. Any article of diamonds or

precious stones is appropriate as a gift.

DINNERS. If the circle of acquaintances is large,

a series of dinners is necessary during the

season.

Dinners should begin at an hour between

seven-thirty and eight-thirty.

The dining-room should be bright and

attractive, well lighted, and artistically decorated

with flowers.

The success of a dinner lies in the selection

of the guests, with regard to their

congeniality to each other, and their conversational

powers and varying attainments. It

is better to have a few at a time, perhaps

eight, as a larger number is unmanageable.

CALLS. Guests should call soon after the dinner.

DRESS. Full dress is worn by both men and

women.

GUESTS. When guests are not congenial, or have

dislikes, they should not show it, but appear

as if the contrary were the case.

Guests should be prompt in arriving at the

hour named.

At the table it is in good taste to accept

whatever is offered, eating it or not, as one

desires. Wines should be accepted, even if

one does not partake of them. And if a toast

is offered, a guest should recognize the courtesy

by raising his glass.

Conversing across the table is permissible,

provided the distance does not require the

voice to be unduly raised.

When coffee is served in the drawing-room,

young women serve, and the men hand it to

the guests.

When the men re-enter the drawing-room

after the coffee, the guests should retire,

unless some further entertainment follows.

This is usually about eleven o'clock. When

leaving, a guest should thank the host and

hostess, making some agreeable and appropriate

remark suitable to the occasion.

HOST. When dinner is announced, the host

offers his left arm to the woman he escorts.

She may be the special invited guest, or the

most prominent guest present.

The signal for all to rise is given by the

hostess, who bows to the woman on the host's

right. The men escort the women to the

door or drawing-room, after which they return,

and cigars and liquors are offered.

The host wears full dress.

GUEST LATE. The host should always come

forward to shake hands with the late-comer,

and help him to find his seat, and do all in

his power to make his late-coming quickly

overlooked.

HOSTESS. The hostess receives her guest at the

parlor entrance.

At table the guests should remain standing

until all have found their places, when the

host and hostess seat themselves, after which

the others follow. The men should assist the

women they escort before taking their own

seats.

At an informal dinner a hostess should introduce

a man to the woman he is to escort

to dinner, informing him whether he is to sit

on the right or left hand of the host.

When the dinner is announced the host

with his escort leads the way, followed by the

guests, and the hostess and her escort come

last.

GUEST LATE. The hostess should always bow

and shake hands with a guest arriving late,

but does not rise unless the guest is a woman.

HOURS. Dinners begin from 7 to 8 P.M., and

usually last from one hour to an hour and a

half.

INTRODUCTIONS. If a man is not acquainted with

the woman assigned to him, the hostess

should introduce him to the woman.

INVITATIONS. These should be acknowledged

immediately by a letter of acceptance, or declining

with regret.

The invitations are given in the name of

husband and wife, and should be sent out

two or four weeks in advance. R. S. V. P.

is not used, and they should be answered

immediately.

Invitations to a dinner in honor of a special

guest are engraved, and state this fact. If

for good reasons there is not sufficient time

to engrave, an ordinary invitation may be

used, and a visiting-card enclosed, upon which

is written: To meet Miss Wilson.

For ceremonious dinners, cards may be engraved,

with place for guest's name left blank

and filled in by hand.

When frequent dinners are given, invitations

may be engraved, with blanks to be

filled with dates, etc.

Written invitations are also proper to indicate

an unceremonious dinner. Note sheets

can be used.

HUSBAND AND WIFE. Both the husband and

wife should always be invited to a dinner.

When a husband and wife are invited to

dinner, and the former does not accept, the

wife should decline, giving her reason. The

hostess can then invite the wife only, who

may accept.

MEN. Full dress is necessary for all except informal

dinners.

The man at the door, after asking the

guest's name, hands him an envelope, with

his name upon it, enclosing a card with the

name of the woman he is to escort to dinner;

or these envelopes may be in the dressing-

rooms, if preferred. It will also be designated

at which side of the table (right or

left) a man is to sit; or a diagram of the

table, with the names of the guests, should

be hung in each dressing-room. The guests

pair off as indicated.

As soon as possible a man should seek the

woman assigned to him, and inform her that

he will be pleased to act as her escort, disguising

any personal preference he may have

otherwise.

He should offer his left arm when escorting

her to dinner.

When the dinner is announced, the host

leads the way with the woman he escorts,

and the rest follow. To avoid confusion, a

man should remember on which side of the

table he is to sit, his place being indicated by

a dinner card.

If unacquainted with the woman a man is

to escort to dinner, he should seek an introduction

from the hostess.

When the women rise to leave, the men

rise and remain standing until the women

leave the dining-room, or they may accompany

them to the drawing-room, and then

return for coffee and cigars. They should

not remain longer than half an hour.

LEAVING CARDS. After a dinner a man should

leave a card for host and hostess, whether

the invitation was accepted or not; or it

may be sent by mail or messenger, with an

apology for so doing.

PRECEDENCE. The host offers his right arm to

the woman who is the guest, or the most distinguished

woman, or the eldest, or the one

invited for the first time. If the dinner is

given in honor of a married couple, the host

would take in the wife, and the husband

would accompany the hostess, who comes

last in the procession into the dining-room.

It is a fixed rule that relatives, or husbands

and wives, are never seated together.

If possible, there should be an equal number

of men and women, and if the latter outnumber

the former, the hostess enters alone.

SECOND HELPING. At formal dinner parties,

luncheons, and breakfasts, second helpings

are never offered by the host or hostess, and

should not be asked for by the guests. This

is only permissible at a small dinner party

or at the daily family meal.

Of course, this does not apply to a second

glass of water for which the guest might ask,

or for wine, for which the butler should keep

a good lookout.

TABLE ETIQUETTE. See TABLE ETIQUETTE.

WOMEN. When wraps have been removed, and

the woman leaves the dressing-room, the escort

chosen by the hostess approaches and makes

known the fact, accompanying her to the

table. If the escort is not thoroughly agreeable

to the woman, she should conceal the

fact.

At the conclusion of a dinner the hostess rises

and the women follow, leaving their napkins

unfolded. They retire to the drawing-room,

while the men remain for coffee and cigars.

If the men prefer, they may escort them to

the drawing-room, where they bow and return.

GLOVES. Women may remove their gloves at

table, and it is not necessary to replace them.

They should be laid in the lap. The hostess

generally determines whether the women

should resume their gloves or not by her own

actions.

Full dress is worn.

GIVEN BY MEN--WOMEN. A young woman may

accept a man's invitation, provided she has

the consent of her mother or guardian, and

is assured that there will be present a chaperone.

GIVEN BY BACHELORS. See BACHELORS' DINNERS.