The Society for washing the physical blackamoor morally white, and
altering the complexion of Indian society, has sent out 1000 copies of
"Major A. on Short Whist," in the hope that a friendly rubber may do
more towards rubbing off the rust of barbarism than any other
hitherto-attempted experiment. It is thought by the Society in question
that, as among Europeans those who are called blacklegs generally
succeed best at cards, the niggers, who have the advantage of being
black all over, may compete successfully with the most accomplished
member of Crockford's. The reports on the subject are not yet very
encouraging, for though there can be but one odd trick in the course of
a single deal, the Indian disciples of Major A. perform a series of the
very oddest tricks all through the game; and when their instructor
endeavoured to make them understand, by signs, that clubs were led, they
followed suit in good earnest, and began scoring away at a tremendous
rate with their tomahawks. It is feared that the idea of teaching the
blacks by the card must be discarded. The only game for which they show
a natural inclination is cribbage, at which their hands are always
excellent.
Among the observations and notes of the emissaries sent out by the
Society, we find it recorded, as a curious fact in natural history,
that, though perfectly black in the hand, the Indians have all the
characteristics of the light-fingered population of this country.
It is thought impossible to wean the natives at once from the eccentric
habit of scalping; but it has been ingeniously suggested that the
propensity may be directed to proper objects, and it is in contemplation
to put pots of porter before one of the tribes, when, if they proceed as
usual to decapitation, leaving nothing but the headless beer, it will
not at all signify.