"_To mister wilyam Waters gardner to squire Brakenhurst, Pipe uppon
trent
staffordsheer._
"DEER WILYAM,
"i now Take up my cast mettle pen & ink to inform yew that i arived safe
in lundun by the Hup train without bean Blowd to attoms, haveing
proffidenshally tuk my plase in a fust clas carige, wich the charges is
for bean Blew to bits in a 2nd class twenty shilin & bean Only yewr arm
broke in the fust clas 30 shilin. Allso their is a 3rd clas lately aded,
wear in adision yew may catch a Bad cold & rewmatisum for life for the
smal charge of 14 shilin. But to return to ariving in lundun, my i! it
is a rare plase. Off its size yew may juge wen i tel yew i have Bean
hear a weak & hav not yet seed awl, But i hav seen a grate menny
wunders—plays & conserts & cosmyrammers & diarammers & call-and-see-ems
& one think or anuther. But i wish i had cum herlier in the seson, ass
threw the fog i hav Mist a gud dele.
"Ass naturaly xpex i 1st pade my cumplements to Sent Pawl: it is a
Bewtifull bilding—only the lower ½ wich yew carnt sea for the sut & the
hupper ½ wich yew carnt sea for the fog. Leastways such was the case the
day i was their: allso the Same afterwoods at West minster aby,
partickly the poets korner bean quite cuvverd with Rhyme. And appropo i
doant advize strangers to vissit lundun like me by the Gide buke, ass i
found the disadvarntige of taking the lions ass they ar set down, namely
1st goin to Sent Pawls, then to West minster aby, then to sent Marys
witechappel then to sent Looks chelsy & cettera. And the same of uther
xibisions, ass from axual xperiance canot recummend going from the
sologgicle gardns in the regensy park to the sologgicles in the Sorry
side, & then to the diarammer & then to the tems tunnel.
"But to return to sent Pawls, i went inside & was lost in Asstonishment,
partickly at the smal space ass is aloud for servess, wich deer wilyam,
it is just ass if at Trent hall master was to shut up the Drawing rume,
& the dining rume & the liberary & the sirvents awl & so forth & only
live in the Butlers pantry. After lissenin to the singin for about ¾ of
a nour i axt 2 off the beetles as was crawling about wen theyde begin to
pray, but insted off replying the 2 blak beetles busted their selves out
a laffin & ran off like Devvles coach orses.
"My next vissit was Doory lane, which is the 1st Inglish theater going——
for frensh fidlers and Jerman orn bloers. The musick was verry
Bewtifull, partickly the basune, which quite went to my art, & put me in
mind off Deer ome & the grene feelds & meddows & evrythink—it was so
like the cryin of a yung carf that had Lost its muther. Wat aded verry
hi to the Afect off the musik was the yung gentel men & ladys a beatin
time with there walkin stix & umberrellows, wich aded to sum Humming the
hair and uthers a marching about exact to the tune rely shows wat may be
Dun in such a plase ass lundun & ow sirvissable sich things is to
improve the Nashonal taste. Allso the same of dres, wich it cumbines the
hellegancys off a maskerade & fancy bawl, menny of the yung men bean
Drest in the karecters of plowmen with smok froks & cettera, and uthers
like hakny coach men & homynibus cads, and sum Disgized in likker. Allso
it is verry pleesing to sea how atentif the yung men ar to the
percedings, for even if a lady cums in during the performense they woant
so much ass Stir from there seats—for feerd off Disturbing the musik.
"Next morning i went to take a walk in covven Gardin, but was verry
disapinted, insted off finding it Lade out in gravvel walks & flour
beds, edged with box and twiggy hosiery, was ful of shops & grate lung
gallerys, & insted off at 1 end a Prety litel arber like ware i ust to
sit corting yewr Deer sister mary is nuthink but a Grate church with a
luminated clok & a lot of grave stones lying about.
"Allso, deer wilyam, i musent forget the briges. they ar realy
Wunderfull & ass for the arches i nevver sea sich Archery in awl my
Days. But Wat yew woodent Like is makeing yew pay tol, just ass if yew
was a hoss or a has, only with this difrance, not alowing yew to cum Bak
the same day without paing afresh, which the 1st time i went over
Waterloo brige i ad quite a Waterloo batel with the man about it, & wat
was wuss for the unperlitenes of the thing, a Bewtifull yung lady cuming
that way, i axualy cort the feller a Tolling the bell. But the most
curus of awl the briges is 1 bilt by mister brunel wich goes Hunder the
warter insted off Hover it, & in lew off entering threw a turnpike gate
as usuel, yew are obleegt to go down a Wel ole, tho for my own part i
Declind the later, ass the old maxum ses Let wel alone.
"From their i perceded to the blue cote skule, a wunderfull site, wear
underds & underds of litel bys & gels of boath sexxs is tort evrythink
free, & ass befour observd the bys is nown by their Blu cotes & the gels
by their Blu stokkins. Same day went to sea Gys ospital, so cawld on
acount off the yung docters makin sich Gys off them selvs: allso from
there to Sent tommasses, but unfortynat coodent gane admision, not bean
1 off Sent tommases Days. Consequensialy, wishing to have a pepe at the
shiping, i inquired my way to the flete, but insted off Old inglands
wudden wals found nuthink but sum uncomon big Stone wals & on axing a
noo polease wear i cood sea a gud large Ship or 2 was Derected to
Smithfeeld.
"Anuther day i went to sea the towr, wear is anuff guns and canons to
canonize old Maimit aley & all his raskly egipsions put together. Allso
the mint ust to be hear, but not off late ears, tho they stil presserve
the ax as cut off the hed off Hanna Bullion.
"Yestoday i vissitted the ile of Dogs and spent the hevening at the
indyan Bow Wow, wich, deer wilyam, a indyan Bow Wow is the same thing
ass a inglish Row de Dow. But to conclude, deer wilyam, in spite of
lundun & awl its wikkidnes i shal be glad to cum down to deer natif
stafordsheer agen, for ass i say, Ome's ome after awl—wen yewr munnys
spent & deer wilyam, giv my Tru luv to yewr sister mary & beg her
exceptence off the inclosd smawl trifl off a steal bodkin wich i wood
have maid it a silver thimbull but unfortynat wayed moor then ½ a ounse,
& deer wilyam, if theirs anythink i can dew for yew in lundun doant say
no, i wood go threw fire and warter to serv yew, but pleas to send the
munny, & rite ass sune ass yew can, not forgeting to pay the post, wich
is ass follos namely for ½ a oz. 1 peece of stikkin plaster, for a hole
2 ditos or 1 Blu un, for 1½ oz. 3 ditos or a Blak & blu, and so on up to
a pound, abuv wich, as a pork pi or a stilton chese or anythink of that
sort, it wood be Beter to send it by the Rale rode or pikfords van. So
no moor from yewr umbel sirvent