A public subscription of several thousand pounds has been proposed to be
raised towards Mr. Buckingham's losses in India; quickened by the threat
that, if not sufficient to maintain him, he would be driven to the very
dreadful necessity of "devoting the remainder of his days to useful and
honourable labour!" To avert so dire a calamity, it will be proposed
among Mr. B.'s friends to revive the old project, and send him round the
world on a voyage of discovery and commerce. He is to sail on the
_first_ of next _April_, and will take with him passengers, emigrants,
and merchandize. First exploring the British coast, he will establish a
colony of tailors at _Sheer_-ness; then offer a consignment of saddles
and bridles to the inhabitants of _Ryde_; afterwards call for Mr. Ole
_Bull_ off _Cowes_, as fiddler to the crew; from thence he will despatch
a bale of _blankets_ to _Friez_-land, and of _gloves_ to the people of
_Pau_, taking in exchange some cheap _coffee_ for charitable purposes
from _Cham-berry_. Proceeding through the Channel, he will receive a few
distressed ladies at _Bride_port on an experimental voyage to
_Beau_-maris. The _late_ ministry will accompany him as far as the _Ex_,
and at _Ply-Mouth Sound_ he will take in the _substance_ of his next
parliamentary campaign. At the _Scilly_ Islands he will try to dispose
of a heavy consignment from Paternoster Row and some leading
establishments at the west-end of the town. He will leave the Poor Law
Commissioners at their headquarters at _Flint_; thence crossing the
Atlantic, he will deposit the bones of Mr. Carus Wilson at _Long_
Island, and offer a cargo of _soft-soap_ at _Washing_ton. He will next
despatch _Stone masons_ to the _Chipaway_ country, and Carpenters to the
_Chick-a-saws_, and he will be commissioned to get a lot of _old Joes_
exchanged at _New-Found-Land_. He will supply the natives of _Chili_
with _great coats_, carry _ham_ and _beef_ to the _Sandwich_ Islands,
and _broad cloth_ to _Bombay_. He will then reach the North Pole by
taking up his ship in an air balloon, and remaining suspended, till, as
the world goes round, the arctic circle is just under his feet, when he
will drop into the midst of it. Coming home from the North, about next
St. Swithin twelvemonths, he will bring us a little _Blue_ from the
Island of _Skye_, and call off the coast of _Ayr_-shire for another
scheme to raise the _wind_. On his arrival, the wooden guns at Jack
Straw's Castle will be fired, and the town illuminated with _moonshine_.
[Illustration:
MAY.—Beating the Bounds.
]
┌────────────────┬────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ [Illustration]│ MAY. │
├──┬─────────────┴────────────────────────────────────────────────────┤
│ │Some modern sages, nothing can be flatter, │
│ │Find _Bi_-polarity 'twixt mind and matter. │
│ │There's prima facie proof, upon the whole, │
│ │It _once_ existed in the _man_-maypole. │
│ │But barring manners, you'll admit no less, │
│ │He stands conspicuous for his pole-height-ness. │
├──┼──────────────────────────────────────────────────────┬───────────┤
│D.│ =Great Events and Odd Matters.= │_Prognosti-│
│ │ │fications._│
├──┼──────────────────────────────────────────────────────┼───────────┤
│ 1│Chimney Sweepers' Jubilee. Emancipation of the │ │
│ │ _Blacks_. │ │
│ │ │ │
│ 2│ │ the lords │
│ │ │ │
│ 3│ ARCHERY.—MISS HIGGINS TO MISS FIGGINS. │and ladies │
│ │ │ │
│ 4│This comes to tell you, dearest Coz, I've been to │ ☌ ♂ │
│ │ Beulah Spa, │ │
│ │And there, among the Archer folk, have shone with such│ │
│ │ éclat. │ │
│ 5│Well, I declare, 'tis charming sport to play at bows │of all the │
│ │ and arrows: │ │
│ │I do not wonder little boys so love to shoot at │ │
│ │ sparrows. │ │
│ 6│Some petty, trifling accidents occurr'd, I must │ houses in │
│ │ confess: │ │
│ │In taking aim, I tore a hole in Mrs. Simpkin's dress, │ │
│ 7│Who gave me such a frightful look, as really made me │ _Petty_ │
│ │ shiver; │ │
│ │And put my nerves in such a way as caus'd my hand to │ │
│ │ quiver. │ │
│ 8│So, just as Mr. Foozle, in his most politest manner, │France.[2] │
│ │Was paying me fine compliments, and calling me Diana, │ │
│ 9│My elbow slipped, and struck him such a blow upon the │ ♋ ♀ ♐ │
│ │ nose, │ │
│ │As caus'd the blood to spirt about, and cover all his │ │
│ │ clothes. │ │
│10│The boy who picks the arrows up, I shot right thro' │ Again │
│ │ the ear: │ │
│ │I'm sure he'd but himself to blame,—he stood so very │ │
│ │ near: │ │
│11│'Twas only just a hundred yards from where the target │ ☽ ♀ ♐ ♄ │
│ │ stood, │ │
│ │So how to help the hitting him would puzzle Robin │ │
│ │ Hood. │ │
│12│Altho' I'm sorry for the brat, I greatly pleas'd my │ who will │
│ │ spark, │ │
│ │Who thought me quite a heroine to shoot so near the │ │
│ │ mark. │ │
│13│So pr'ythee come, my dearest Coz, Diana's bow to draw,│deny, that │
│ │And join the gay Toxophilites who shoot at Beulah Spa.│ │
│14│ │ │
│ │ │ ♏ ♉ │
│15│Whit-Monday. │Now madcap Mirth, with reckless air, │ │
│ │ │ Sports down gay Pleasure's tide; │ _Juniper_ │
│16│Whit-Tuesday.│With every care cast to the winds, │ │
│ │ │ And all his _Wits-untied_. │hath a more│
│17│ │ │
│ │ │ malignant │
│18│ │ │
│ │ │ influence │
│19│ [Illustration] │ │
│ │ │ than │
│20│ │ │
│ │ │_Jupiter?_ │
│21│ │ │
│ │From Friars-Black and Chapel-White │ │
│22│ They rush to Greenwich Fair, │ ♅ ☉ ☊ ☽ │
│ │Each donkey-cart has its asses' load, │ │
│23│ Each chaise owns three a pair. │ │
│ │Some go by steam or sailing vessel, │ or, that, │
│24│Some by the _Elephant and Castle_. │ │
│ │ │ in the │
│25│The vent'rous see that famous hill, │ │
│ │ Renown'd for fate's decree, │olden times│
│26│That they who tarry at the top │ │
│ │ Shall soon the bottom see. │ of │
│ │ │ pugilism, │
│27│There's merry frisking on the grass, │ │
│ │ For courting sporting people; │ │
│28│And the curious seek the spying glass, │ ♀ ♐ ♊ ♉ │
│ │ To peep at Barking steeple. │ │
│29│ │ │
│ │ │ │
│30│ │ │
│ │ │ │
│31│ │ │
└──┴──────────────────────────────────────────────────────┴───────────┘
Footnote 2:
A _terra incognita_, lying in the vicinity of Tothill Fields.
[Illustration]
"Show his eyes and grieve his heart;
Come like shadows, so depart."