The religion of the author's family.
Youwarkee and I having fixed ourselves, by degrees, into a settled rota
of action, began to live like Christians, having so great a quantity of
most sorts of necessaries about us. But I say we lived like Christians
on another account, for you must not think, after what I have said
before, that I and my family lived like heathens; no, I will assure
you, they by degrees knew all I knew, and that, with a little artificial
improvement, and a well-regulated disposition, I hoped, and did not
doubt, would carry them all to heaven. I would many a time have given
all my interest in the ship's cargo for a Bible; and a hundred times
grieved that I was not master of a pocket one, which I might have
carried everywhere about me. I never imagined there was one aboard, and
if there were, and You-warkee should find it, I supposed it would be in
Portuguese, which I knew little of, so it would be of small service to
me if I had it.
Since I am on the topic of religion, it may not be amiss, once for all,
to give you a small sketch of my religious proceedings after coming into
my new dominions. I have already told you that from my first stop at the
rock I had prayed constantly morning and evening, but I cannot say I did
it always with the same efficacy. However, my imperfect devotions were
not without good effect; and I am confident, wherever this course is
pursued with a right view, sooner or later the issue will prove the
same to others as I found it to myself; I mean, that mercies will be
remembered with more gratitude, and evils be more disregarded, and
become less burdensome; and surely the person whose case this is, must
necessarily enjoy the truest relish of life. As daily prayer was my
practice, in answer to it I obtained the greatest blessing and comfort
my solitude was capable of receiving; I mean my wife, whose character I
need not farther attempt to blazon in any faint colours of my own after
what has been already said, her acts having spoken her virtues beyond
all verbal description.
After we were married, as I call it--that is, after we had agreed to
become man and wife--I frequently prayed before her, and with her (for
by this time she understood a good deal of my language); at which,
though contrary to my expectation, she did not seem surprised, but
readily kneeled by and joined with me. This I liked very well; and upon
my asking her one day after prayer if she understood what I had been
doing (for I had a notion she did not)--"Yes, verily," says she, "you
have been making petitions to the image of the great Collwar."*--"Pray,"
says I (willing gently to lead her into a just sense of a Supreme
Being), "who is this Collwar? and where does He dwell?"--"He it is,"
says she, "that does all good and evil to us."--"Right," says I, "it
is in some measure so; but He cannot of Himself do evil, absolutely and
properly, as His own act"--"Yes," says she, "He can; for He can do all
that can be done; and as evil can be done, He can do it."--So quick a
reply startled me. Thinks I, she will run me aground presently; and from
being a doctor, as I fancied myself, I shall become but a pupil to my
own scholar. I then asked her where the great Collwar dwelt? She told
me in heaven, in a charming place.--"And can He know what we do?" says
I.--"Yes," replied she, "His image tells Him everything; and I have
prayed to His image, which I have often seen, and it is filled with so
much virtue that it is His second self; for there is only one of them
in the world who is so good: He gives several virtues to other images
of Himself, which are brought to Him, and put into His arms to breathe
upon; and the only thing I have ever regretted since I knew you is, that
I have not one of them here to comfort and bless us and our children."
* God.
Though I was sorry for the oddity of her conceptions, I was almost glad
to find her so ignorant, and pleased myself with thinking that as she
had already a confused notion of a Supreme Power, I should soon have the
satisfaction of bringing her to a more rational knowledge of Him.
"Pray, Youwee," says I, "what is your God made of?"--"Why of clay," says
she, "finely painted, and looks so terrible he would make you tremble to
behold him."--"Do you think," says I, "that is the true Collwar's real
shape, if you could see Himself?" She told me yes, for that some of His
best servants had seen him, and took the representation from Himself.
"And pray, do you think He loves His best servants, as you call them,
and is kind to them?"--"You need not doubt it," says she.--"Why, then,"
replied I, "how came He to look so terrible upon them when they saw Him,
as you say they did? for I can see no reason, how terrible soever He
looks to others, why He should show Himself so to those He loves. I
should rather think, as you say He is kind to them, that He should have
two images, a placid one for His good, and a terrible one for His bad
servants; or else, who by seeing Him can tell whether He is pleased or
angry? for even you yourself, Youwee, when anything pleases you, have a
different look from that you have when you are angry, and little Pedro
can tell whether he does well or ill by your countenance; whereas,
if you made no distinction, but looked with the same face on all his
actions, he would as readily think he did well as ill in committing
a bad action." Youwarkee could not tell what to say to this, the fact
seeming against her.
I then asked her if she thought the image itself could hear her
petitions. She replied, "Yes."--"And can he," says I, "return you an
answer?"--She told me he only did that to his best servants.--"Did you
ever hear him do it?" says I. "For unless he can speak too, I should
much suspect his hearing; and you being one of his best servants, seeing
you love him, and pray heartily to him, why should you not hear him as
soon as others?"--"No," says she, "there are a great number of glumms
on purpose to serve him, pray for us to him, and receive his
answers."--"But to what purpose then," says I, "is your praying to him,
if their prayers will serve your turn?"--"Oh," says she, "the image
hears them sooner than us, and sends the petitions up to the great
Collwar, and lets Him know who makes them, and desires Him to let them
have what they want."--"But suppose," says I, for argument sake, "that
you could see the great Collwar, or know where He was, and should pray
to Himself, without going about to His image first, do you think He
could not hear you?"--"I cannot tell that," says she.--"But how then,"
says I, "can He tell what (if it could speak) His image says, which is
as far from Him and then her own zealous application, with God's grace,
soon brought her to a firm belief in it, and a suitable temper and
conduct with respect to God and man."
After I had begun with my children, I frequently referred their further
instruction to their mother; for I have always experienced that a
superficial knowledge, with a desire of becoming a teacher, is in some
measure equivalent to better knowledge; for it not only excites every
principle one has to the utmost, but makes matters more clear and
conspicuous even to one's self.
By these means, and the Divine blessing thereon, in a few years, I may
fairly say, I had a little Christian church in my own house, and in a
flourishing way too, without a schismatic or heretic amongst us.