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ALF'S BUTTON
BY W. A. DARLINGTON
[Illustration: Decoration]
NEW YORK
FREDERICK A. STOKES COMPANY
PUBLISHERS
_First published in America by_ FREDERICK A. STOKES COMPANY
_in 1920_
FOREWORD
It is a curious fact that since the death of the late lamented Aladdin,
nothing seems to have been heard of his wonderful Lamp. Mr. Arthur
Collins and other students of ancient lore have been able, after
patient research, to reconstruct for us the man Aladdin in his habit as
he lived and to place before our eyes a faithful picture of his times.
Alike in literature and on the stage the Lamp plays an all-important
part; and this makes it all the more strange that its subsequent
history should have been so entirely lost.
I myself incline to the theory that Aladdin allowed the secret of his
talisman to die with him, and that his widow disposed of an object
whose presence in her husband's collection of articles of "bigotry and
virtue" she had always resented, for what it would fetch. Its tradition
once broken, we cannot suppose that an old battered lamp bearing on
one portion of its surface a half-effaced inscription in forgotten
characters would attract much attention as an _objet d'art_. In fact,
it would be without value or interest except to a scholar learned
enough to interpret the inscription aforesaid--which may be rendered in
our tongue "Rub Lightly."
All this, however, is mere conjecture. It is based on my knowledge,
accidentally gained, that a lamp of this description formed part of a
job lot of "assorted curios" acquired by the Government with a view
to subsequent reissue in the form of buttons for soldiers' tunics.
This fact, taken in conjunction with the unusual events I am about to
relate, does lend a certain color to the theory which I support; but of
solid proof I can of course offer nothing.
Some of Alf Higgins' adventures have previously appeared in _The
Passing Show_. The Editor of that paper, by the interest he showed in
Alf, has incurred the grave responsibility of encouraging me to write
this book about him.
CONTENTS
CHAPTER PAGE
FOREWORD iii
I. ALF HIGGINS, RUNNER 1
II. ALF CLEANS HIS BUTTONS 13
III. THE MIRACLE OF THE PLANES 23
IV. THE MISGUIDED ZEAL OF EUSTACE 36
V. EUSTACE FETCHES BEER 49
VI. ISOBEL'S "DREAM" 62
VII. EUSTACE ORDERS A BATH 80
VIII. BLIGHTY FOR TWO 97
IX. LIEUTENANT DONALDSON BECOMES SUSPICIOUS 115
X. EUSTACE BLUNDERS AGAIN 133
XI. THE VICAR'S WIFE OUTRAGED 149
XII. ALF RECEIVES 167
XIII. P. C. JOBLING INVESTIGATES 191
XIV. MR. FARR'S MISGUIDED ZEAL 206
XV. THE CAPTURE OF MASTER BOBBY 229
XVI. MRS. GRANT'S DIPLOMACY 246
XVII. THE FATE OF THE BUTTON 263
Copyright 1919 by Frederick A. Stokes Company
ALF'S BUTTON
CHAPTER I
ALF HIGGINS, RUNNER
"Very well, sergeant-major, I think that's the lot. As far as we know,
we'll take over the front line from the 4th Battalion in two days'
time. I want you to warn all the men who aren't coming up with us that
they are to go to the Transport lines to-morrow."
Captain Richards, commanding "C" Company of the 5th Battalion,
Middlesex Fusiliers, rose to his feet, snapped shut his company
roll-book and stretched himself. Sergeant-Major French, slipping a
similar though less immaculate roll-book into his breast pocket, also
rose to his feet (nearly bumping his tin-hatted head against the roof
of the dug-out as he did so) and saluted.
"Very good, sir. Good night."
"Good night, French. Oh--one moment. I'd forgotten. I want one extra
runner for Company Headquarters. Can you give me an intelligent man?"
The C.S.M. considered.
"There's only 'Iggins, sir," he said, in rather a dubious tone. "You
know the man, sir--in Mr. Allen's platoon."
Captain Richards laughed.
"You can't call him intelligent, can you?"
"No, sir. But nearly every man in the company's fixed with a job, sir.
'Iggins ain't very bright, an' 'e won't do no more than you tell 'im.
But 'e won't do no less, neither. 'E's a good soldier, and what 'e's
told to do, 'e does. I don't think we can spare anybody better, sir."
"All right. Send him down to see me."
Richards was left to his thoughts, though he was not alone. From
somewhere in the dim recesses of the dug-out came the sound of deep
regular breathing, showing where Lieutenant Donaldson was making
the most of an opportunity for rest. The remaining two officers of
"C" Company had been out all day reconnoitering the piece of front
line in which they were to relieve the 4th Battalion, and had not
yet returned. Richards found himself wishing that they would appear.
For one thing, he wanted his dinner; and for another, he was just a
shade anxious, though he would not for worlds have admitted it. Of
course, reconnoitering was always a long job, and there had not been
much shelling going on during the day. Besides, Denis Allen--senior
subaltern of the battalion and next on the list for command of a
company--was far too old a hand to run into unnecessary danger. On the
other hand, little Shaw had only just come out from England; this was
his first time in the line, and he was just the type of keen young
thing to do something foolish out of ignorance or bravado.
Richards himself, with Donaldson and the sergeant-major, had been over
the trenches the day before. It is not usual for all the officers of
a relieving company to see the ground for themselves; but this was a
piece of line quite new to the Home Counties' Territorial Division, of
which the Middlesex Fusiliers' Brigade formed part. The authorities
therefore had deemed it advisable to use even more care than usual.
It was bitterly cold. The Great Frost of January and February,
1917--the coldest spring that France had known for a period of
years variously estimated at twenty-one, a hundred and eight, and
intermediately--was still in being. Richards turned up the collar of
his British warm and longed for soup. He was just considering the
advisability of shouting to the servants to serve his dinner at once,
when there came a trampling on the stairs, a metallic clang, and some
picturesque cursing. A moment later, Denis Allen emerged from the
gloom, followed by little Shaw.
"Thank God for my tin hat," said Denis piously. "That's about the only
thing it's good for. I'd have brained myself long ago on these stairs
without it."
He divested himself of the article in question, as also of his
equipment, glasses and trench coat; these he piled upon the recumbent
form of Donaldson, bringing that warrior to a sudden and profane
wakefulness.
"Here," said Allen to Shaw, "we have the company commander sitting at
home in luxurious idleness, while we poor blighters do his work for him
outside in the cold. If you've drunk all the whisky, Dickie, there's
going to be a mutiny. I'm simply perishing. Where's the dinner?"
"Here, sir," said Private Corder, the senior servant, entering with the
soup.
"Bless you, Corder. May your shadow never grow less."
"No, sir. Please, sir, Private 'Iggins wants to see you, sir."
"Me?" said Richards. "Oh, yes, of course. Send him down in a minute,
but give me time to finish the soup first."
He warmed his fingers round the steaming mug.
"Well, Denis," he went on. "How did you like the front trenches?"
"Fine. Best lot I've seen. Top-hole duck-boards, good dug-outs, quiet
bit of line. Couldn't be better, except for the cold. Shaw here was
most impressed, and said he'd like to have shown his mother round them."
Second-Lieutenant Shaw grinned.
"Well, she gets the wind up rather, you see," he explained. "I think
she imagines the front line with a perpetual barrage playing on it
like a garden hose. I must say I didn't expect to see it _quite_ so
peaceful myself. Or so clean and tidy."
"Ah, that's the frost. I tell you, we've been grousing enough lately
about being here for the hardest frost within memory, but you've got
to remember that it does keep the water frozen up in the trench walls.
Let's pray the frost doesn't break while we're in the line."
Allen looked suddenly grave.
"I did notice a trickle of water here and there to-day," he said.
"Dickie, I'm afraid we're in for a thaw. We shall be wading up in
gum-boots in two days, you'll see. Here comes Higgins."
A nondescript private, with a straggling mustache and a pair of round,
childish blue eyes, came into the light and saluted.
"Oh, Higgins," said Captain Richards, "you're to join Company
Headquarters as a runner. D'you know the job?"
"Yes, sir. Carryin' messages."
"Yes. Well, now, I was only told to-day that I'd to have an extra one,
otherwise you'd have been sent up with the rest to look round. However,
you'd better take my trench map away with you and study the lie of the
land from it. You can read a map, I suppose?"
"No, sir."
"Not at all?"
"No, sir."
"Good Heavens, I asked for an intell--however, there's nobody else.
That will do, then, Higgins. Report to me before we move off, and do
your best."
"Yes, sir."
Private Alfred Higgins departed, marveling at the strange chance that
had elevated him to this responsible post. He was not sure whether
he was pleased or otherwise. A runner's is a business admitting of
startling variations. In a quiet sector of the line there may be no
messages to take, or at least no shells to dodge in the process; but in
a lively part of the front the runner's job is the most consistently
perilous of all. Besides this, Alf Higgins had always considered it
the wisest plan to steer carefully clear of those in authority. As a
runner, he would be in constant personal touch with his officer.
He returned to his mates with mixed feelings, and confided his news
to his bosom pal, Bill Grant, who deeply offended him by roaring with
laughter at the mere idea.
As for Sergeant Lees, Lieutenant Allen's second in command of No. 9
Platoon, he seemed to regard Higgins' latest employment as marking the
beginning of the end.
"If 'Iggins is a bright, intelligent man for a runner," he remarked
bitterly, "I may be a blinkin' brigadier yet."
Lieutenant Allen's gloomy weather predictions duly came to pass. When
the battalion moved up the thaw had begun in earnest. The water so
long imprisoned streamed out of the walls of the trenches, and the
disgusted men found themselves committed to wading five miles through
communication trenches already a foot deep in water. This water grew
visibly deeper as they went forward, till progress became difficult
and most exhausting. Richards, plugging along doggedly in front of his
company with the guide from the 4th Battalion, looked at his watch when
they had covered half the distance and found that they were already an
hour overdue. He hated being late with a relief, but greater speed was
impossible. As the flow of water increased, the sides of the trenches
began to fall in; the earth thus mixed with the water thickened it to a
consistency which might be likened to very rich soup, and the pace grew
slower still.
Now and then a dark cavern would yawn suddenly beside them, and a
ghostly glimmer in the bowels of the earth would show an inhabited
dug-out; and as the relieving party squelched slowly past, the water
in the trench would be forced above the level of the dug-out entrance,
and would flow thundering down the staircase like a miniature Niagara.
Terrible objurgations from beneath would express the inmost thoughts
of some weary warrior rudely awakened from sleep by the impact of a
cold wave of muddy water against the back of his neck. Sympathetic, but
powerless to avoid continuous repetition of the offense, the company
plodded on.
At last, four hours behind the time fixed, a husky voice out of the
darkness informed Richards that he had reached his destination.
Some time elapsed before everything had been satisfactorily handed over
and explained to the incoming company, but at last the 4th men splashed
thankfully off--to cause another series of Niagaras to descend upon
the indignant warrior aforesaid--leaving Captain Richards entirely
responsible for several hundred yards of the British front.
It was at this point, when the Company Headquarters went off to their
comparatively dry dug-out, leaving the rest of the company to their
miserable vigil on the surface, that Private Higgins realized that the
runner's lot can be a very happy one.
This opinion grew more and more pronounced as time went on. Officers
relieved each other in the front line, coming off duty covered with
wet clay nearly to the waist and scraping their breeches clean
with their knives before lying down to snatch a little rest; while
he--Higgins--lay warm and dry, with nothing to do but eat and sleep.
All was quiet up above; both armies were far too much occupied
with their own discomforts to think about adding to those of their
adversaries. Possibly, thought Higgins in a flash of foolish optimism,
his whole four days might be spent in a dry dug-out, eating and
sleeping. But he must have omitted to touch wood, for at this point he
heard his name called.
Captain Richards was holding in his hand a paper which the signaler had
just handed to him.
"Higgins," he ordered. "Take this up to Mr. Donaldson in the front line
at once, and bring back an answer. It's a report on the condition of
the front line dug-outs. Understand?"
"Yessir!"
"Are your gum-boots all right?"
"Yessir!"
"Right! Carry on!"
Higgins clambered up the steps to the surface. Before he stepped
over the dam which had been constructed round the dug-out entrance,
he glanced round. The complicated canal system, which had been the
trenches, looked even more forbidding by day than it had the previous
night, and the water looked horribly cold. But there was nothing to be
gained by waiting, and he waded off up a communication trench. Very
soon he found himself in difficulties. The trench walls had continued
to fall in, with the consequence that in places the thick soup had
become glue. Once or twice he felt his foot sticking in the viscous
stuff that had collected over the duck-boards, and had to struggle hard
before he could release himself. Suddenly, without warning, he struck
an even worse patch. Both feet were seized and held as in a vise. He
fought hard, but only sank deeper. At last, quite exhausted, he felt
his feet reach the duck-boards; and, thankful that at least he could
sink no lower, he settled down with stoical resignation to wait till
some one should come.
But an hour went by, and nothing happened; Higgins began to be hungry.
Possibly, he thought, this particular trench had been found impassable,
and traffic directed through other channels, in which case he might
never be found. Appalled by this idea, he lifted up his voice.
"Hi!" he yelled. "'Elp!"
For sole answer, a German "fish-tail" whirred overhead and burst with
great violence not far away. His own side remained as quiet as the
grave.
Higgins began to lose his head.
"'Elp! 'Elp!" he bawled, a note of panic in his voice.
"There now, duckie!" came in soothing accents from round the corner in
front of him. "Mummie's comin'! What the 'ell's the matter?"
A gum-booted, leather-jerkined private came slowly into view.
"Why," he exclaimed, "it's old Alf! Thought you was on G.H.Q. staff,
'elpin' 'Aig, Alf. What's all the row about?"
"Bringin' a message up to the orficer, an' I got stuck. Been 'ere
hours, I 'ave."
"Stuck in the 'Glue-Pot,' that's what you 'ave, ole son," said Private
Bill Grant cheerfully. "You must 'ave been a mug to use this way.
Every one's usin' number One-Eight-Oh now; it's deeper, but not so
sticky. The officer brought that message up 'isself when 'e came on
dooty. They was sayin' some nice things about you, I don't think.
You're in for it, you are, when you gets out o' that."
Higgins was past caring.
"'Ere, Bill, can't you pull me out?" he pleaded.
"Not if I knows it. That's the Glue-Pot you're in. If I started pullin'
you out, I'd get stuck there meself, that's all. You'll 'ave to stop
till arter dark, an' we'll come along over the top and 'ave yer out
with a rope. So long."
The unfeeling Bill kissed his not over-clean hand and disappeared round
the corner. Silence--broken occasionally by the sharp crack of a rifle
bullet or the explosion of a casual shell--settled down once more.
Higgins sank into a kind of stupor....
* * * * * * *
"Hist!" said a slightly dramatic voice above him, and he woke to a
consciousness that darkness had fallen, and that the rescue party was
at hand.
"That you, sergeant?" he asked joyfully.
"Not so loud, you blinkin' fool!" whispered Sergeant Lees fervently.
"It ain't daylight now. The Boche 'as the wind up proper, an' if 'e
'ears you there'll be 'ell on. Catch 'old o' this rope. Now then, lads,
ready? 'Eave!"
Higgins felt the rope tighten. Then came an almost intolerable strain
on his body as the six panting figures up above opposed their joint
strength to the passive resistance of his firmly-embedded gum-boots.
Something had to give somewhere. That something turned out to be
Higgins' old pair of braces, which had been forced to undertake the
support of the said boots in addition to their usual responsibility.
They snapped suddenly. The tug-of-war party collapsed in a heap, and
Alf shot into the air like a cork from a champagne-bottle (leaving
his trousers behind him) and fell again into the trench beside his
tenantless and immovable boots.
He owed it to the quick wit of Sergeant Lees that he did not become
bogged once more. His legs were already sinking in the ooze of the
Glue-Pot when the sergeant leaned over, seized him by the coat collar
and dragged him up by main force, just as his jacket split along its
whole length with a rending sound. A Boche machine-gunner, much alarmed
at the highly unusual sounds proceeding from the British lines, began
to enquire into the matter. The shell-hole into which Alf rolled for
safety happened to be full of filthy water, icy cold.