_Monday, November 15th._--To induce the House of Lords to accept a
measure for the compulsory acquisition of land is analogous to the
process of getting butter out of a dog's mouth; and it is not surprising
that Lord PEEL essayed the task of getting a second reading for
an Acquisition of Lands Bill in rather gingerly fashion. When one
remembered a racy correspondence in the newspapers over certain
Midlothian farms one could hardly have been surprised if the Laird of
DALMENY had reappeared in the arena, flourishing his claymore. But,
alas! he still remains in retirement, and it was left to Lord SUMNER to
administer some sound legal thwacks and, in his own words, to "dispel
the mirage which the noble Viscount raised over the sand of a very arid
Bill." He did not oppose the Second Reading, but hinted that if ever it
emerged from Committee its own draftsman would not know it.{missing
period in original}
The PRESIDENT OF THE BOARD OF TRADE must regard Monday with rather mixed
feelings. That is the day on which Questions addressed to his Department
have first place on the Order-paper; and accordingly he has a lively
quarter-of-an-hour in coping with the contradictory conundrums of
Cobdenites and Chamberlainites. On the whole he treads the fiscal
tight-rope with an imperturbability worthy of BLONDIN. A Tariff
Reformer, indignant at the increased imports of foreign glass-ware,
provoked the query, "Does my hon. friend regard bottles as a
key-industry?" And a Wee Free Trader who sarcastically inquired if
foreign countries complained of our dumping cement on them at prices
much above the cost in this country was promptly told that "that is the
very reverse of dumping."
Sir DONALD MACLEAN was rewarded to-night for all his uphill work as
leader of the Wee Frees before--and since--Mr. ASQUITH'S reappearance.
On the Financial Resolution of the Ministry of Health Bill his eloquent
plea for the harassed ratepayers received an almost suspiciously prompt
response from Mr. BONAR LAW, who admitted that it was inconvenient to
drive an "omnibus" measure of this kind through an Autumn Session, and
intimated that thirteen of its clauses would be jettisoned. An appeal
from Lady ASTOR, that the Government should not "economise in health,"
fell upon deaf ears. Dr. ADDISON not only enumerated the thirteen doomed
clauses, but threw in a fourteenth for luck.
[Illustration: THE OVERLOADED OMNIBUS.
_Conductor ADDISON (to Driver LAW)._ "WHAT, YOU CAN'T GET 'OME BY
CHRISTMAS WITH ALL THEM PASSENGERS ON TOP? WELL, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME
BEFORE I TOOK 'EM ON?"]
_Tuesday, November 16th._--I don't suppose Lord CREWE and the other
noble Lords who enlarged upon the theme "_Persicos odi_" expected to
embarrass the FOREIGN SECRETARY by their cross-questioning. Persia is
to Lord CURZON what "de brier-patch" was to _Brer Rabbit_. He has been
cultivating it all his life, and knows every twist and turn of its
complicated history, ancient and modern. The gist of his illuminating
lecture to the Peers was that our one aim had been to maintain Persian
independence with due regard to British interests, and that it now
rested with the Persians themselves to decide their own destiny.
[Illustration: BRER RABBIT{original had 'RABBBIT'} IN HIS ELEMENT.