My new master’s name was Mr. Horken. He was a tolerably good man, so
far as whipping was concerned; but fed his slaves most miserably,
giving them meat only once each month.
At the plantation where I lived two years previously, I became
acquainted with three slaves, who had now determined to make an
effort to gain their freedom, by starting for the free States. They
came down to see me, and try to induce me to go with them, they
intending to start in about three weeks; but they exacted from me a
promise of secrecy in regard to the whole matter. I had not as yet
fully made up my mind to make an attempt for my freedom, therefore
did not give a positive promise to accompany them. I had known
several, who, having made the attempt, had failed, been brought back,
whipped, and then sold far to the South. Such considerations somewhat
discouraged me from making the attempt.
As the time drew near for them to start, they came again to know my
decision. I told them that I had consulted my mother, whose fears
for my success were so great, that she had persuaded me not to go.
These three friends were very religious persons, one of them being
a Methodist preacher. He, in particular, urged me very strongly to
accompany them, saying that he had full confidence in the surety of
the promises of God, who had said that heaven and earth should pass
away, before one jot of his word should fail; that he had often tried
God, and never knew him to fail; consequently he believed he was able
to carry him safely to the land of freedom, and accordingly he was
determined to go. Still I was afraid to risk myself on such uncertain
promises; I dared not trust an unseen God.
This visit to me was on Sunday, and they had planned to start the
Saturday night following, and travel the next Sunday and Monday. It
was not uncommon for slaves to go away on Saturday and not return
until the following Tuesday, feigning sickness as an excuse, though
this pretence not unfrequently subjected them to a flogging. So that
very little alarm was felt for a slave’s absence until Wednesday,
unless his previous conduct had excited suspicion.
On the night on which they intended to start, accompanied by several
of their fellow slaves, they repaired to an open lot of ground.
Others, prompted by curiosity, followed, until quite a large
concourse was assembled. Here they knelt in prayer to the great
God of Heaven and Earth, invoking Him to guard them through every
troublesome scene of this life, and go with them to their journey’s
end. Afterwards they sang a parting hymn, bidding their companions no
other farewell, the hymn being exactly appropriate to the occasion.
It was one of the old camp-meeting songs:—
“Farewell my dear brethren, I bid you farewell!
I am going to travel the way to excel;
I am going to travel the wilderness through,
Therefore, my dear brethren, I bid you adieu!
The thought of our parting doth cause me to grieve,
So well do I love you; still you I must leave;
Though we live at a distance, and you I no more see,
On the banks of old Canaan united we will be.”
I well remember the evening of their departure. It was a beautiful
night, the moon poured a flood of silver light, and the stars shone
brilliantly upon their pathway, seeming like witness of God’s
presence, and an encouragement that he would guide them to their
journey’s end.
After they had gone, I began to regret that I had so much distrusted
God, and had not accompanied them, and these regrets weighed so
heavily upon my mind, that I could not rest day or night.
Wednesday came, and with it uproar and confusion, for three slaves
were missing, of whom no one could give any account. Search was
instantly made, which was, of course, unavailing, since they were
already safe in some free State. Who would have thought that those
contented negroes would have left their masters, preferring freedom
to slavery? But they are in Canada.
Some time after this, master Richard concluded to sell his
plantation, and with his slaves remove to Mississippi, my mistress
consenting that he might take hers also. So he, one day, told me that
I could have my choice, go with him or be sold. I told him I would
not leave him to go to any one else in the known world. He then said
that he would hire me out the next year, upon conditions that my
employer should release me to him whenever he called for me. So when
my year with Mr. Horken was up, I was hired to Dr. Johns upon the
above conditions.
It was rumored about that I had given the three escaped slaves
passes, it being known that I could write a tolerable hand. But
master Richard looked into the affair, and finding no evidence
against me, the subject was dismissed.
I lived with Dr. Johns from the commencement of the year, until the
middle of June. About this time two more slaves attempted to escape,
but were overtaken, caught, and brought back. It was said they had
passes, but of the truth of this I am not sure, as the slaveholders
reported many stories to implicate me in guilt. But God fought my
battle.
To make matters appear still more in my disfavor, one slave, whom I
never knew, told his master that I was going to run away, and had
been trying to persuade him to go; that my master was going to remove
me South, but that I intended to leave for the free States.
These were facts; but how this slave came by them I never knew, as I
had only confided them to one man, and he came off with me. I left
home on Saturday night, and on Sunday several slaves were arrested
and put in irons, suspected of intentions of trying to escape with
me. I was about three miles from home, and knew nothing of all this,
though they were hunting for me.
I felt very melancholy all day Sunday, yet knew not the cause. Early
Monday morning, the constables were at Dr. Johns’, waiting my
arrival, to take me; but I did not go home that morning, nor have I
ever since been there. Still, it was my intention to have gone, but
God overruled that intention by a better.
I started early on Monday to return to the doctor’s, and got within
a mile of that place, to a fork of the roads, when suddenly my steps
were arrested, and a voice seemed to say, don’t go any farther in
that direction. I stopped, considered a moment, and concluded that
it was mere fancy or conceit. So I started on again; but the same
feelings returned with redoubled force.
What can all this mean? I queried within myself; these sensations
so strange and unusual; yet so strong and irresistible? It was God,
warning me to avoid danger by not going home. So I turned upon my
footsteps, and immediately these feelings left me. I sat down by the
side of the road to reason upon the matter, when, for the first time,
I felt an entire confidence in God, and prayed in faith.
I now made a third attempt to go home. But upon reaching the same
spot, I was more uncontrollably effected than before. I became nearly
blind, my head swam, and I could scarcely stand. I now felt satisfied
that it was the working of an unseen God, and really think that had
I still persisted in my attempts to go forward in that direction, I
should have fallen as one dead, in the road.
I therefore went into the woods and stayed until night, when I went
to a neighboring slave’s quarters, where I got something to eat.
After this, I started for Mr. Morton’s plantation, where Uncle
Harry’s wife lived, and which was near Dr. Johns’. Harry was a
carpenter, and was at work for the doctor, therefore I knew that I
could learn through him the whole state of affairs there, as he came
home to stay nights.
As soon as I entered the house, Uncle Harry exclaimed, “John, what
have you been doing?” “Nothing,” I answered. He then said, “the whole
plantation, at the doctor’s, is in an uproar about you, as they say
you have been giving passes to slaves, to help them run away, which
you also intend to do yourself; and, accordingly, the constables
have been on the watch for you these two days. I saw your old mother
to-day, who was running from one road to the other, to meet you, to
prevent your coming home, lest they should catch you. Now I don’t
know what you will do, as they have advertised you, offering three
hundred dollars for your arrest; so the patrollers will be looking
for you; consequently you had better not stop here long. I promised
your mother to try and see you to-night.”
He told his wife to give me something to eat, but told me it would
not be safe for me to stay there to eat it. I moved slowly away, but
he hastened my footsteps, as did the angel those of good old Lot, for
surely danger was at my heels.
Now my morning’s feelings were fully explained. I knew it was the
hand of God, working in my behalf; it was his voice warning me to
escape from the danger towards which I was hastening. Who would not
praise such a God? Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised.
I felt renewed confidence and faith, for I believed that God was
in my favor, and now was the time to test the matter. About two
rods from Uncle Harry’s house I fell upon my knees, and with hands
uplifted to high heaven, related all the late circumstances to the
Great King, saying that the whole world was against me without a
cause, besought his protection, and solemnly promised to serve him
all the days of my life. I received a spiritual answer of approval;
a voice like thunder seeming to enter my soul, saying, I am your God
and am with you; though the whole world be against you, I am more
than the world; though wicked men hunt you, trust in me, for I am the
Rock of your Defence.
Had my pursuers then been near, they must have heard me, for I
praised God at the top of my voice. I was determined to take him at
his word, and risk the consequences.
I retired to my hiding place in the woods until the next night, when
I returned to Uncle Harry’s, that I might see or hear from my mother.
I found her there waiting for me. She had brought food in her pocket
for me.
I inquired if the patrollers had been there in search of me, and was
told that they had not as yet, but would, doubtless, be there that
night.
My mother appeared almost heart-broken. She did not wish me to go
away, and had been to master Richard about me, who had promised
to inquire into the accusations against me, and if there was not
sufficient proof to substantiate them, they could not injure me. But
he recommended that I should keep out of sight for the present, and
if he could do nothing else in my favor, he would so manage, that
when he was ready to go South, I could be got off with him. I thought
this a very wise plan too, in case I desired to go South; but I had
fully resolved to go North.
I did not, however, communicate this resolution to mother, as I saw
she was not in a proper condition to receive it. She promised to go
again to master Richard, and come and let me know the result of her
visit. But I knew I should never again see her, and that I was then
probably taking my last look of her—this side the grave.
Upon leaving me, she took my hand, and in a voice choked by sobs,
gave me her parting blessing. My heart was so full that I could
scarcely endure this, and but for the support of God, I must have
fainted. I now returned to my hiding place, leaving word with Uncle
Harry, where the friend who had promised to come away with me, might
find me.
As soon as he heard he came directly to see me, for he had been
anxious lest I should go off without him.