THE HUSBAND OF THE AMERICAN WOMAN
The telephone and the ticker--The most useful of domestic
animals--Money-making--Loneliness of the women--A reminiscence of
Chicago.
On the whole, I believe that there is no country where men and women go
through life together on such equal terms as in France. The wife
follows her husband everywhere; she is the companion of his pleasures
as well as of his hardships. She works with him, takes her vacation
with him, and when they have amassed a little fortune that insures
independence, they knock off work together and enjoy life quietly for
the rest of their days. In business, the wife is the clerk of her
husband, often his cashier, always his partner. She is consulted by him
in the investment of their savings. It is a little firm--Monsieur,
Madame and Co.
In England, the wife does not share the hardships of her husband, and
not always his pleasures. She is seldom consulted in important matters.
What often astonishes us in Europe is to see a crowd of handsome and
clever women, whom America sends to brighten up society, and who
reappear in London and Paris every year with the regularity of the
swallows. The London season, from the beginning of May to July 25, the
Paris season, from the beginning of April to June 10, are absolutely
run by them. You meet them everywhere, at dinner-parties, 'At Homes,'
and the play. You conclude that they must be married, because they are
styled Mrs. and not Miss, but whether they are wives, widows, or
divorcees, you rarely think of inquiring, and you go on enjoying their
society, even their friendship, year after year, without knowing
whether there exists, somewhere in America, a Mr. So-and-so or not.
It was in America only, on calling on my lady friends whose
acquaintance I had made in Europe, that I discovered the existence of
their husbands. I found them very much alive, having for the companions
of their joys and sorrows the telephone and the ticker.
Now, an impression (not an opinion, much less a conviction) to be
formed from all this is that the American woman, with all her physical
beauty and intellectual attainments, is not always a woman whose
characteristic traits are devotion, unselfishness, and self-sacrifice.
But it is not her fault if this should be the case, and I have no
reason to suppose that it is. In a community, woman is what man makes
her. So long as men's first consideration is business and money-making,
so long as they consider clubs the proper place to seek relief in from
the pursuits and hardships of everyday life, so long as wives are
practically left to themselves to make the best of the long leisures of
the day, the women will study how best they can arrange for themselves
a life of comfort, ease and pleasure. Is there any other country where
you will find women able to enjoy life without the companionship of
men? They have come to an understanding among themselves. They will
have lunch, dinner-parties, where no male guest will be seen, and they
will have a grand time. They try to please each other, and an American
woman will use as much coquetry to win a woman as a French woman will
use to win a man. Is there any other country where you see so many
women's clubs?
Women's clubs? The idea!
Yet that American woman has male friends. She is a delightful chum and
good fellow, the only woman in the world who can have such male
friends, 'pals' without the least misconstruction, the least
objectionable whisperings on the subject. She calls those male friends
by their Christian names in speaking of them, although she invariably
mentions her husband as Mr. John B. Smith.
The American men are the most devoted of husbands, but they are not
under the influence of their women. They indulge them in all their
whims and luxuries, but their status in life is to be their women's
husbands--I will not say upper servants, but domestic animals, not
pets, of undeniable usefulness, who work at the sweat of their brows to
keep in luxury the most lovely, interesting and expensive womankind in
the world.
Some years ago, I was spending a Sunday afternoon in the house of a
young married man in Chicago who, I was told, possessed twenty
millions. The poor fellow! It was the twenty millions which possessed
him. He had a most beautiful and interesting wife, and the loveliest
little girl of three or four years of age that I ever set my eyes on.
That lovely little girl was kind enough to take to me at once--there's
no accounting for taste! We had a little flirtation in the distance at
first. By-and-by, she came toward me, nearer and nearer, then she
stopped in front of me, and looked at me, hesitating, with her finger
in her pretty little mouth. I knew what she wanted, and I said to her:
'That's all right; come on.' She jumped on my knees, settled herself
comfortably and asked me to tell her stories. I started at once. Now,
you understand, I was not allowed to stop; but I took breath, and I
said to her:
'Does not your papa tell you long stories on Sundays?'
That lovely little round face grew sad and quite long.
'Oh no,' she said; 'papa is too tired on Sundays.'
A few weeks after I left Chicago that man was taken ill with a disease
not uncommon in America, a disease that starts at the top of your head
and takes two or three years to kill you in a lunatic asylum, among
drivelling idiots and imbeciles.
A couple of years later, being in Chicago again, I made inquiries and
learned that the poor fellow was expected to exist a few weeks, perhaps
a few months longer.
What a pity, I thought, that beautiful woman had not enough influence
over that good man to stop him!
Do not offer me twenty millions at that price. No twenty millions can
cure the disease which afflicted that American.
Put a little girl of three on my knees on Sundays, and I will tell her
stories from sunrise and go on till sunset, even if I thus run the risk
of being prosecuted by the Lord's Day Observance Society.