E-text prepared by Roger Frank and the Project Gutenberg Online
Distributed Proofreading Team (http://www.pgdp.net)
THE YOUNG MAIDEN.
by
A. B. MUZZEY,
Author of The Young Man's Friend, Sunday School Guide, &C
"Young Men, and Maidens; * * *
Let them praise the name of the Lord."
Tenth Edition.
Boston
Wm. Crosby & H. P. Nichols,
111 Washington Street
1848.
Entered, according to Act of Congress, in the year 1840, by
A. B. Muzzey,
in the Clerk's Office of the District Court of Massachusetts.
Cambridge:
Metcalf and Company,
Printers to the University.
CONTENTS.
Chapter I.--The Capacities of Woman, page 5
Chapter II.--Female Influence, 30
Chapter III.--Female Education, 53
Chapter IV.--Home, 81
Chapter V.--Society, 107
Chapter VI.--Love, 136
Chapter VII.--Single Life, 151
Chapter VIII.--Reasons for Marriage, 163
Chapter IX.--Conditions of True Marriage, 191
Chapter X.--Society of Young Men, 205
Chapter XI.--First Love, 213
Chapter XII.--Conduct during Engagement, 222
Chapter XIII.--Trials of Woman, and her Solace, 237
Chapter XIV.--Encouragements, 255
DEDICATION.
TO THE
YOUNG MAIDENS OF OUR FAVORED UNION,
THIS VOLUME
IS AFFECTIONATELY INSCRIBED,
BY THEIR FRIEND,
THE AUTHOR.
THE YOUNG MAIDEN.
Chapter I.
THE CAPACITIES OF WOMAN.
The appropriate sphere of woman--how ascertained. By considering
her Intellectual, Moral, and Physical Constitution; by a view of
the Scripture teachings on this point; by a reference to History,
observation, and experience. The women of Babylon. Patriotism of
Phoenician women. Grecians and Romans. Modern Pagan Women.
Occupations and Habits of Christian females friendly to
improvement. State of Society, especially in this country,
favorable. Effect of Chivalry on woman. The division of Duties
between the sexes, and their Mutual Influence demand separate
spheres. Woman should not engage in severe Physical toil. Milton's
opinion. Nor in Political life. Plato's theory. Nor in promiscuous
public Discussions. Home one part of her sphere. Private
Beneficence. The Statue of ivory better than that of brass.
Society requires Woman's presence. Lord Halifax's a good view of
Female capacities.
Before entering on any statement of duties, it is incumbent on us to
determine what power there is to perform them. An angel's task may not
be laid on a mere mortal. It is only where many talents have been given,
that great returns can justly be required. Nor should our requisitions
fall below the powers of those of whom they are made. We may not claim
simply a child's service, where the ability of a giant clearly exists.
Achilles would spurn the light offices of Adonis. So will that woman,
who regards her sex as co-equal in every part of their nature, with the
opposite sex, contemn the delicate tasks, usually termed feminine.
Much is said in our age and country of the appropriate sphere of woman.
The discussion of that point is too interesting and too important to be
passed over in this work, but the consideration of it involves another,
viz., What are her Natural Capacities? How does she compare with, and
wherein differ from man? This topic seems a fit introduction to what may
follow in our survey of the wide field now open before us.
The capacities of woman may be ascertained by the study of her Physical,
Intellectual, and Moral constitution; by the disclosures of the Sacred
Scriptures; and by a reference to History, observation and experience.
1. The Physical Constitution of woman is peculiar. In barbarous nations
she has often been subjected to the same manual exertions as man;
sometimes to those even more arduous. But the progress of refinement and
civilization always establishes a marked distinction between the two
sexes, in this respect. Nature revolts at the thought of the Amazon. A
Boadicea and a Joan of Arc, were they now to appear, would be almost
universally regarded as disloyal to their sex. A masculine woman and an
effeminate man are in equal disesteem. We instinctively pronounce her to
unsex herself, who arms for the battle-field, or engages in those
agricultural, mechanic, or other manual pursuits, which demand great
bodily vigor. God hath made the sexes herein to differ, and man, we
feel, ought not to confound them.
In respect also to Intellectual Powers, there is among most people a
conviction that severe reasoning, comprehensiveness, and logical
acuteness belong pre-eminently to man. I know there are illustrious
exceptions to the truth of this statement; but do we not rightly esteem
the Elizabeths and Somervilles that occasionally challenge our
admiration of their intellectual strength, as exceptions to the ordinary
female mind? Ascribe this difference, if you please, to the neglect of
their education, say that man is only the superior, because of his
higher advantages of culture, still must not the fact of his present
mental superiority be conceded?
Nor should I deem it to the discredit of woman, were it incontestibly
proved, that her Maker had given her less intellectual power in some
provinces than man. For though, in civil affairs, in controlling the
destinies of nations, in framing laws and administering justice, man
labors in his exclusive sphere, yet in delicacy of perception and
taste, and as a guardian at the fountains of Imagination, to woman he
must yield the superiority. In the silence of her retirement she ponders
on the themes of fancy, and while the consecrated names of Hemans and
Sigourney shall endure, let man be slow to assume an absolute dominion
in all the noble provinces of intellect.
But maintain as we may our constitutional ascendancy in the Physical and
Mental capacities, there is one realm where woman reigns in undisputed
supremacy; it is the realm of Moral power.
God has given her a keen sensibility, and a strength of feeling, and
sympathies and affections which prepare her for singular eminence in
moral attainments. In the religion of Ancient Greece, it was she who
presided at the tribunal of fate; her native enthusiasm qualified her
for this office. "A man," says Diderot, "never sat on the sacred tripod;
a woman alone, could deliver the Pythian oracle; alone could raise her
mind to such a pitch as seriously to imagine the approach of a god, and
panting with emotion, to cry, 'I perceive him, I perceive him; there!
there! the god!'" The same zeal which was displayed in devotion to a
false faith, is seen in Christian lands, sustaining the morals and piety
of eternal life.
Woman is more susceptible than man of sudden and strong impressions. Her
impulses are quick and prompt, but this trait unless counterbalanced by
others, would expose her to irresistible evil. She would fall an easy
prey to lawless emotions. God has kindly averted this calamity, by
inspiring her with a constancy and devotedness seldom witnessed in man.
Let her place her affections on any object, and they will cling to it
through every trial and change. What love so strong as woman's? What
moral power can compare with hers, when principle, duty, devotion, once
engage the full energies of her soul?
2. What we have learned from this glance at the constitution of your
sex, is verified by the Sacred Scriptures. In the book of Genesis we are
told that God "took one of the ribs of Adam, as he slept, and closed up
the flesh instead thereof." Some commentators translate this passage
thus: "he took one out of his side, and put flesh in its place;" and
they thence infer that Adam and Eve were created at once, and joined by
the side to each other; that God afterward sent a deep sleep upon Adam,
and then separated the woman from him. They were thus on a perfect
equality till the period of the fall. After that melancholy event, the
sentence was pronounced on woman, "Thy desire shall be to thy husband,
and he shall rule over thee." And through all the subsequent history of
woman, as found in the Bible, it is said, her inferiority to man is
constantly implied.--Among the woes predicted by the prophet Isaiah, as
awaiting Jerusalem and Judah, this is included, "Women shall rule over
them."
Let the original relative capacities of woman have been as they might,
one fact is clearly apparent, that the general condition of women among
the ancient Jews, and in contemporary nations, was one of degradation and
servitude. She was the slave of man. The Essenes, a Jewish sect not
unlike the modern Shakers, treated this sex with little respect, often
with contempt. The system of polygamy, of old almost universally
prevalent, tended directly to "stifle the best emotions of the female
heart, and to call all its worst passions into exercise." It has been
supposed by some, that the wonder which the disciples of Christ
expressed, when they found him conversing with the woman of Samaria,
originated partly in their low opinion of her sex. The Talmud teaches
that it is beneath the dignity of a Rabbi, to talk familiarly with a
woman; and the Jew was accustomed, we are told, to give thanks to God,
that he was not a woman.
But open the New Testament, and how in a moment is this estimation
elevated. Of the Physical and Intellectual rank of woman, nothing is,
indeed, there said. But as a creature of God, and a member of the great
family of mankind, she is placed on an entire equality with man.
Christianity does not make her responsible, as a moral and immortal
being, to man, but represents both as having a common Master in heaven.
No virtue inculcated on the one sex is omitted in describing the duties
of the other. The Christian character is a moral statue, to be wrought
by every living hand; and taste, composition, symmetry, effect, are
required and expected, in the spiritual workmanship, no less of woman
than of man.
The personal treatment which this sex received at the hand of Jesus, was
always respectful, as well as tender and kind. "His earliest friend was
a woman; his only steadfast friends through his ministry were women." It
was "the daughters of Jerusalem," who wept for him in his final agony.
"The last at his cross, and the first at his sepulchre, was a woman. And
when, after his ascension, the little company of believers was
assembled, waiting for the fulfilment of his promise, there also were
found the women who had accompanied him in life and stood by him in
death." How could he, with such proofs of their piety, zeal and
perseverance, fail to regard the sex with a consideration, at least
equal to that he bestowed upon man?
And in the religion itself, we find qualities with which the capacities
and powers of woman singularly harmonize. It is based upon the
affections. Love to God, and love to man, are its two great
commandments. The sacrifice it requires on the altar of life is that of
the heart. And what is this but the unquestioned empire of woman?
Sentiment with her is natural, the growth of her moral being; in man it
is usually acquired, the result of thought. Deny, as man may, her mental
equality with himself,--doubt as we may, the comparative strength or
capabilities of any other portion of her nature, as related to man, in
the possessions of the heart, no man can contest the ascendancy with
woman. She is naturally less selfish than man. She can, if she will but
obey her best impulses, rise to the loftiest heights of Christian
excellence. And, if serious impediments oppose her progress, on herself,
her own culpableness, not on her nature, must each consequent failure be
charged.
Another characteristic of our religion is its call for what have
sometimes been termed the passive virtues, fortitude, submission,
patience, resignation. The acquisition of these qualities is to man a
most arduous task. He can toil, and struggle, and resist. In scenes of
active effort, and strong conflict, he is at home. But his power of
endurance is by no means commensurate with these traits. In woman they
find a congenial spirit, a heart open, and waiting for their
reception.--"Those disasters," says an elegant writer, "which break down
and subdue the spirit of man, and prostrate him in the dust, seem to
call forth all the energies of the softer sex, and give such intrepidity
and elevation to their character, that at times, it approaches to
sublimity." Who does not perceive that this sex enjoys pre-eminent
advantages for the culture of that spiritual union with God required of
the Christian? And in sustaining the ordinary trials of our lot, as
social beings; in cherishing forbearance toward the unjust, kindness to
the thankless, and love toward those who inflict personal injuries,
woman is endowed by her Maker with a divine power.
3. The History of this sex is a still farther testimony to their moral
capacities. We have examples of illustrious female virtue in the annals
of the Patriarchs, as Sarah, Rebecca, and Rachel. In Holy Writ, we read
also of Miriam and Deborah; and the picture left us by Solomon, of "a
virtuous woman," evinces not only the existence, but the appreciation of
a true woman, by some in those early ages.
If we turn to the records of heathen nations, we find them occupied,
when they speak of this sex, almost universally, in describing rare
cases of personal prowess or physical conquests. The wealth of Babylon
was such, and its advancement in science and refinement so great, that
we may presume the female character to have been more elevated, than in
savage countries. There was a true moral courage in that act recorded of
the Phoenician women, who agreed, that if their countrymen lost a certain
battle, they would perish in the flames, and who crowned with flowers
her who made that proposition in a council. Would that history had
transmitted the testimony of those quiet, unobtrusive virtues, which
must at some ancient periods have prevailed, and which are the glory of
woman.
In more recent ages, we find among the Greeks noble examples of female
heroism, of conjugal love, and sisterly affection; but the exclusion of
woman from society placed her under great moral disadvantages. Rome
allowed this sex more free intercourse in social life, and the renowned
Cornelia was hence a representative of no small number of her age.
But how few opportunities do modern Pagan religions allow woman for
exhibiting her moral capabilities. The stern creed of the Mussulman
pronounces, we are told, that woman has no soul; she is treated, in any
event, according to this doctrine. In China, among the lower classes,
all the hard labor is laid upon the wife, while the husband performs
only the lighter tasks. In the higher classes, the sex is completely
secluded from all places of public instruction, and subjected to laws
which repress all their energies, both of mind and heart. India
furnishes examples of conjugal devotedness, worthy a more enlightened
direction. Alas! that such a spirit can find no purer modes of
self-sacrifice, than casting the body on a funeral pile, or beneath the
wheels of Juggernaut. Profane History, in its wide range, gives us
indeed but an occasional gleam of the genuine virtues of woman. How
unlike Christianity, which presents a brilliant succession of these fair
examples.
In Christian lands the occupations and habits of woman are such as to
give scope for moral eminence. She has fewer worldly interests and
engagements than man. She is not here accustomed to command armies, nor
lift up her voice in the Senate chamber. Nor is she subjected to those
coarser employments, and that severe bodily toil, which elsewhere rob
her of all true delicacy. What an immense chasm do we see between the
Christian female, devoted to her quiet domestic duties, and the
inhabitant of Van Dieman's land, for example, diving into the sea for
shell-fish, while her husband sits by the fire, pampering his appetite
with the choice morsels which she has procured for him.
But Christianity must be pure, to produce this change; we shall else
retain, under the light of the Gospel, the spirit and practices of
Paganism. "In one place on the road," says a recent traveller in Italy,
"we saw at least one hundred young girls, mixed up with as many rough
coarse men, carrying baskets of earth, some fifty rods, upon their head,
for the purpose of filling up an embankment or road." "Heathenism, and
paganized Christianity," he remarks, "degrade woman to a level with the
slave." "In none of the slave States which I have visited," says
Professor Stowe, "have I ever seen negro women drudging in such toilsome
out of door labors, as fall to the lot of the laboring women in Germany
and in France." "Haggish beldames fill all our markets," says Chevalier,
"and three-fourths of our fields."
But in the beautiful language of another, when speaking of the sect
called Friends, which language I would apply to all genuine piety, "The
Inner Light sheds its blessings on the whole human race; it knows no
distinction of sex. It redeems woman by the dignity of her moral nature,
and claims for her the equal culture and free exercise of her
endowments. As the human race ascends the steep acclivity of
improvement, the Quaker cherishes woman, as the equal companion of the
journey." The Christian's home is a scene of retirement favorable to
moral culture and to growth in grace. There the soul may contemplate its
Creator, and hold communion with the lovely image of his Son. Far from
the fields of ambition and gain, away from the agitations of a public
arena, in sacred seclusion pursuing her domestic avocations, why should
not woman be distinguished for her spiritual attainments? Can it be,
that with the same watchfulness, and self-denial, and toil, she should
not surpass man in the acquisition of holiness and purity?
Another circumstance, friendly to the developement of woman's
capacities, is the state of society and the country in which we live.
Our free institutions do much to remove those obstacles, that elsewhere
exist, to the full exercise of her powers and faculties. Those false
distinctions in society, by which wealth and rank alone can secure to a
child its rightful education, are here seldom witnessed. In the public
schools, the daughters of all, rich or poor, high or low, mingle for
literary instruction. A mighty arm is thus raised to level that barrier,
which in other lands, rises even between the cradles of the titled and
the obscure.
Not only is the intellect of woman thus trained in childhood to equal
progress with that of the opposite sex, but all those moral advantages,
which are connected with mental culture, are secured to this sex. The
constitutional advantage she possesses, for attainments in virtue and
piety is thus indulged with peculiar facilities for its exercise, and
her sphere of employment, so quiet and hallowed, is not corrupted but
purified by the social atmosphere she breathes from her earliest days.
We are now prepared for a reply to that exciting inquiry alluded to in
the commencement of this work, "What is the appropriate sphere of
woman?" Having determined for what duties and occupations she is
qualified, it becomes less difficult to decide when she is acting within
her true sphere, and when she departs from it. If Nature has intimated
any class of employments, as more suitable, from their delicacy, for her
physical powers than others, then we infer, that if she forsake those
for sterner avocations, she disobeys the will of God; and that too, as
clearly and certainly, as if it were inscribed in letters of fire on the
material heavens.
It would have been surprising, however, had not many in this age, and
especially in our own country, have passed to extremes in their opinions
of the rights of woman, and of her appropriate sphere. Having escaped,
through the influence of Christianity, from the error of degrading her
to the station of a slave, it was natural that they should more and
more elevate her, until her true position in the world would be entirely
misapprehended.
The first impulse in this direction was seen in the age of Chivalry.
Then woman was the idol of man. She was served with a sickly and
sentimental devotion, through which its object became indolent,
degraded, and lost to all moral and intellectual excellence. Then came
the influence of those Political changes produced by Christianity,
which, while they somewhat elevated the mental condition of this sex,
left them still subordinate in many respects to man. At length a
republic was founded on these shores, tending, in its true uses, to
elevate all classes, but still to render each individual, when his own
best interests were perceived, content in that state, for which
Providence manifestly designed him.
But how natural that the condition for which God had created the
strongest physical frames and intellectual capacities, should be an
object of envy, and discontent, and ambition, with those to whom he had
denied these endowments. Could it be anticipated that woman would in all
cases be true to her sex, and reply, as did the discreet Shunamite to
the prophet's interrogatories, "What is to be done for thee? Wouldst
thou be spoken for to the king? or to the captain of the host?" "I
dwell among mine own people." That is, "Where God has appointed my lot,
I am content to live and toil."
It may be objected that I assume the existence of two distinct spheres
of action, in this world. This is acknowledged, and it is, I believe,
susceptible of demonstration. In all nations there is found a division
in the character of human occupations. The savage has his hunting and
fishing grounds, which call for labors of a wholly different character
from those of the wigwam. And though woman may, and often does engage in
the sterner duties of the tribe, yet man cannot supply the earliest
wants of the infant, and he violates the plainest decrees of nature, if
he leave not some other duties exclusively to woman.
Civilization modifies this division of labor, but cannot obliterate it.
Rather must its true work be the more wide separation of the sphere of
each sex from that of the other. Christianity elevates the rank of
woman, and through civilization, gives her a new moral and intellectual
importance in society. Mental culture, again, diminishes both the taste
and the necessity for those coarser tasks, to which, in ruder ages she
must in some degree be subject. But if it qualify her for higher
intellectual employments, her progress does not surpass that of man.
They are relatively, as distant in this respect from each other, as
they were in the days of the Patriarchs. The cultivated female mind
enchants the world,
"And fills
The air around with beauty; we inhale
The ambrosial aspect, which, beheld, instils
Part of its immortality."
This leads us to say, that God must have designed woman for a peculiar
sphere of action, because it is only when she is thus situated, that the
mutual influence of the sexes, so important to earth's moral good, can
be fully exerted. The boy at school inclines to rough manners. What more
effectual restraint upon this tendency, than the delicacy and gentleness
which marks the little girl? She again, may become painfully diffident,
and a recluse in her bearing, if not subjected to the society of the
more confident sex. Encourage the boy to sit always by the fireside, and
studiously shun conversation with the opposite sex, or put the girl
forward and incite her to a bold and boisterous manner, and their mutual
influence is diminished and soon lost. You transgress a plain law of the
Creator.
So in the society of adults. Let men group themselves together, and they
will converse only of their farms, their merchandize, and their
manufactures, or of governments and administrations. Insulate the female
sex, and they shall discourse upon dress, or the minor affairs of their
neighbors, far too exclusively. But shall we, to obviate these evils,
completely transpose their conditions? Do we wish to see woman on
Change, or man given up to fashion, and culinary duties? No; let the
main pursuits of each be distinct; but let neither regard him or herself
as having no influence on the duties of the other.
What check were there on man's wrong impulses as a lover of gain, or a
devotee of ambition, should woman participate with him in these
dispositions? And would not the inevitable consequence of her resigning
herself to masculine offices and labors be, that she became as insane in
the toil for riches as man; that she proved his rival instead of his
ally; that far from composing and regulating the fire of his ambition,
she did but kindle it to a devastating flame? To argue the contrary were
to close our eyes on the native ardor of woman, and to forget the
fearful agency of sympathy, when it takes an unholy direction. Morality,
religion, the order, if not the very existence of society, hence point
out a peculiar and appropriate sphere to woman.
Let me say first, negatively, what is not the province of this sex.
They should not engage in pursuits, for which their Physical powers are
inadequate. If man is endowed with superior bodily strength, to him
exclusively be allotted those manual avocations, which demand that
strength. Let not the more delicate sex be tasked with the severe
exercises of the field or the workshop. And if mental power depend at
all on physical, if giant minds are usually found in vigorous frames,
woman may infer that she can engage in the highest intellectual pursuits
only by becoming an exception to the ordinary character of her sex.
"For contemplation he, and valor formed,
For softness she, and sweet attractive grace."
Again, it is not the province of woman to enter into Political life.
Plato, indeed, admitted this sex to an equal share with man in the
dignities and offices of his commonwealth. But we should remember his
was an imaginary state, an Utopia, not a part of our plain, practical
world. I do not forget here the long line of Queens that grace the
annals of history; yet what had they achieved, wreaths though they wore
on their brows, had not man been usually the prime minister and
controlling agent in their governments? The affairs of nations require
in those who guide them a practical acquaintance with business
transactions, and a familiar knowledge of pursuits and interests with
which woman is not ordinarily conversant. And how unfeminine were it in
her to raise her gentle voice amid the storm of debate, or to rush into
the heat and strife of partizan politics! Let such scenes never be
coveted save by the Wolstonecrafts and the Wrights who have madly
unsexed themselves.
Nor can I admit that woman may with propriety be seen and heard at
Public Meetings, mingling with the opposite sex. Man becomes effeminate
by intermeddling with the province of woman. She also becomes coarse and
masculine, when she enters his sphere. Is her nature more mild than his?
Why then desecrate it, by those fierce collisions with him, which attend
so many of our public discussions? How unlady-like are contention,
violence, and passion. How certainly will woman sacrifice her best
influence over man by consenting to stir his spirit to hostility, in
ardent debate. Where are those mutual services, and friendly offices, so
beautifully ordained by Providence, between the two sexes, when once
they are ranged, as public competitors, in pride, zeal, envy, and
jealousy, stimulating each other to the struggle for victory?
But to speak on the positive view of our subject. What is the
appropriate sphere of woman? Miss Sedgwick, in her work on
Self-training, has answered this question well, and to that I refer the
reader. Meantime we all have, I think, an ideal of this sphere,
although in the details of it we may somewhat differ. We all desire to
see this portion of our race pure and pious; and we should add to these
qualities gentleness, graceful manners, and a delicate, modest
deportment. There are limits moreover of propriety, established in our
own minds, beyond which we should be pained to see a friend of this sex
ever pass. For one, I would not so contract these limits, as to repress
the powers, or to do injustice to the capacities, or trench on the
rights, of woman. I would encourage no Sultan spirit, nor arrogate a
single claim over her, deduced from any assumed superiority of my own
sex. Give her every opportunity; remove all obstacles; furnish the
utmost facilities, and let God speak his will through her actions.
To this end, I would name first, what is incontestibly one part of the
sphere of woman, Home. She may act in other situations, in this she
must. Providence whispers to her in the cradle the divine monition, "Be
a kind, obedient, dutiful daughter." And if, to the latest moment of her
life, she heed not this solemn charge, she is false, not only to her own
sex, but to man and to God.
The Sister, by what other virtues can she expiate a neglect of the
claims of her beautiful relation? Let her be a monitor to the younger,
and receive kindly the counsels of the elder, in her paternal circle,
and how does she grace a sweet portion of her appropriate sphere. Nor
will I omit to say, that whether united to another by the sacred bond of
marriage or not, if she be a true woman, she is instinct with those
inward charms, and Christian dispositions, which qualify her for that
responsible connection. Intelligence, wisdom, disinterested affection, a
mind to advise, a heart rich with sympathies, and a hand to aid,--these
should find in her their chosen resting-place.
And what Mother can fill the sphere ordained for her sex, if she be not
a devoted parent? Possessed of this trait, no woman can fail of honor
and usefulness. She who looks on her race with a maternal interest, who
feels that God hath made of one blood all the children of the earth, and
who lives not for herself but her neighbor, she is of the genuine female
nobility. There is in her character a grandeur,--let her dwell in
"Alpine solitude,"--before which the admired of all admirers, the gay
butterfly, whose wings open and close with the sun of adulation, shrinks
into an object of pity.
Next to home, I should cite Private Beneficence, the scenes of Charity,
and the chamber of sickness, as within the sphere of woman. Let her not
only minister to the needs of her own fireside, but put on the sandals
of mercy, and go forth to the bed of suffering, and the dwelling of
poverty.
Does she court distinction and applause? There are those who would rend
the air with shouts, did she pass as a Queen, in some gilded chariot; or
clap their hands at the strains of her eloquence, in crowded halls. But
how few are these, compared with those who commend her, who is an angel
of love in the dark hours of life. What true woman would not prefer that
the statue erected to her honor should be of the delicate ivory, rather
than of brass, that emblem of boldness?
She who would follow Christ, must, I am sure, take generally the
sequestered path of private charity, rather than live for the public
gaze, though it were that of the host of officers and members of all the
benevolent societies in Christendom. Who were the women, whose charities
are engraven on the eternal records of the New Testament? Private
almoners, Joanna, Mary Magdalen, Susanna, and others "ministered unto
their Lord of their substance," by personal attendance.
But still farther, in the intercourse of Society, woman has duties
appropriate to her sex, grave and weighty duties. I would not that she
engage in a single pursuit, that shall disqualify her for this function.
If she degrade herself to the rank of a painted image, decked in apparel
to charm simpletons, or if she flutter in the breeze of silly speeches
and simpering airs, she is a traitress to her nature. She goes out,
deplorably out, of her sphere.
Nor would I that, by sun-burnt labors and field-tasks, she should bronze
herself, and lose that refinement, which is a guardian to her virtue,
and the anchor of her spiritual hope. A coarse woman, she who fails in
all the attractions and graces of her sex, and who is a corrupter of
good society, steps sadly aside from her place. While Christian
gentleness, seeking to render all happy, and Christian purity, frowning
on every shade of guilt, in social intercourse, are the true praise of
this sex.
Lord Halifax, in his advice to his daughter, observes, "Nature hath made
you such large amends for the seeming injustice of the first
distribution, that the right of complaining is come over to our sex. You
have it in your power, not only to free yourselves but to subdue your
masters, and without violence, throw both their natural and legal
authority at your feet. We are made of different tempers, that our
defects may be mutually supplied. Your sex wanteth our reason for your
conduct, and our strength for your protection; ours wanteth your
gentleness to soften, and entertain us. The first part of our life is a
good deal subjected to you in the nursery, where you reign, without
competition, and by that means, have the advantage of giving the first
impressions. Afterwards you have stronger influences, which well
managed, have more force on your behalf, than all our privileges of
jurisdiction can pretend to have against you. You have more strength in
your looks, than we have in our laws; and more power by gentleness, than
we have in our arguments."
Have I circumscribed too much the sphere of woman? Does she aspire to
other and broader scenes of occupation? If God hath endowed any one with
the spirit of a prophetess, let her prophecy; if of teaching, let her
wait on that office. Wheresoever a capacity is bestowed, it is the
sign-manual of Heaven. Forbid it, honor, justice, and all that is manly,
that I close one avenue opened by the Divinity. But I have spoken of
woman in the mass;
"Common clay, ta'en from the common earth,
Moulded by God, and tempered by the tears
Of angels, to the perfect form of woman."
She who is faithful to her Home, to the sacred calls of Charity, and to
the holy impulses of her Social being, fulfils no mean office. She ranks
with the glorious sisterhood, who have gone to the rest of the sainted.
Let her soul be baptized into the spirit of God, let his glory be the
seal of her deeds, and she shall at length join that great company, who
"neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of
God."