He is concerned in a dangerous Adventure with a certain
Gardener--Sublimes his Ideas, commences Gallant, and becomes acquainted
with Miss Emily Gauntlet.
He and some of his companions one day entered a garden in the suburbs,
and, having indulged their appetites, desired to know what satisfaction
they must make for the fruit they had pulled. The gardener demanded
what, in their opinion, was an exorbitant price, and they with many
opprobrious terms refused to pay it. The peasant, being surly and
untractable, insisted upon his right; neither was he deficient or
sparing in the eloquence of vulgar abuse. His guests attempted to
retreat; a scuffle ensued, in which Peregrine lost his cap; and the
gardener, being in danger from the number of his foes, called to
his wife to let loose the dog, which instantly flew to his master's
assistance, and, after having torn the leg of one and the shoulder
of another, put the whole body of scholars to flight. Enraged at the
indignity which had been offered them, they solicited a reinforcement
of their friends, and, with Tom Pipes at their head, marched back to
the field of battle. Their adversary, seeing them approach, called
his apprentice, who worked at the other end of the ground, to his
assistance, armed him with a mattock, while he himself wielded a hoe,
bolted his door on the inside, and, flanked with his man and mastiff,
waited the attack without flinching.
He had not remained three minutes in this posture of defence, when
Pipes, who acted as the enemy's forlorn hope, advanced to the gate with
great intrepidity, and, clapping his foot to the door, which was none of
the stoutest, with the execution and despatch of a petard, split it into
a thousand pieces. This sudden execution had an immediate effect upon
the apprentice, who retreated with great precipitation, and escaped at
a postern; but the master placed himself, like another Hercules, in
the breach; and when Pipes, brandishing his cudgel, stepped forward to
engage him, leveled his weapon with such force and dexterity at his
head, that had the skull been made of penetrable stuff, the iron edge
must have cleft his pate in twain. Casemated as he was, the instrument
cut sheer even to the bone, on which it struck with such amazing
violence, that sparks of real fire were produced by the collision.
And let not the incredulous reader pretend to doubt the truth of this
phenomenon, until he shall have first perused the ingenious Peter
Kolben's Natural History of the Cape of Good Hope, where the inhabitants
commonly used to strike fire with the shin-bones of lions which had been
killed in that part of Africa.
Pipes, though a little disconcerted, far from being disabled by the
blow, in a trice retorted the compliment with his truncheon, which, had
not his antagonist expeditiously slipped his head aside, would have
laid him breathless across his own threshold; but, happily for him, he
received the salutation upon his right shoulder, which crashed beneath
the stroke, and the hoe dropped instantly from his tingling hand. Tom,
perceiving, and being unwilling to forego, the advantage he had gained,
darted his head into the bosom of this son of earth, and overturned him
on the plain, being himself that instant assaulted by the mastiff, who
fastened upon the outside of his thigh. Feeling himself incommoded by
this assailant in his rear, he quitted the prostrate gardener to the
resentment of his associates, who poured upon him in shoals, and turning
about, laid hold with both his hands of this ferocious animal's throat,
which he squeezed with such incredible force and perseverance, that the
creature quitted his hold; his tongue lolled out of his jaws, the blood
started from his eyes, and he swung a lifeless trunk between the hands
of his vanquisher.
It was well for his master that he did not longer exist: for by this
time he was overwhelmed by such a multitude of foes, that his whole body
scarce afforded points of contact to all the fists that drummed upon
him; consequently, to use a vulgar phrase, his wind was almost knocked
out, before Pipes had leisure to interpose in his he behalf, and
persuade his offenders to desist, by representing that the wife had
gone to alarm the neighbourhood, and in all probability they would
be intercepted in their return. They accordingly listened to his
remonstrances, and marched homewards in triumph, leaving the gardener
in the embraces of his mother earth, from which he had not power to move
when he was found by his disconsolate helpmate and some friends whom
she had assembled for his assistance. Among these was a blacksmith and
farrier, who took cognizance of his carcase, every limb of which having
examined, he declared there was no bone broken, and taking out his
fleam, blooded him plentifully as he lay. He was then conveyed to his
bed, from which he was not able to stir during a whole month. His family
coming upon the parish, a formal complaint was made to the master of
the school, and Peregrine represented as the ringleader of those who
committed this barbarous assault. An inquiry was immediately set on
foot; and the articles of impeachment being fully proved, our hero was
sentenced to be severely chastised in the face of the whole school. This
was a disgrace, the thoughts of which his proud heart could not brook.
He resolved to make his elopement rather than undergo the punishment
to which he was doomed; and having signified his sentiments to his
confederates, they promised one and all to stand by him, and either
screen him from chastisement or share his fate.
Confiding in this friendly protestation, he appeared unconcerned on the
day that was appointed for his punishment; and when he was called to
his destiny, advanced the scene, attended by the greatest part of the
scholars, who intimated their determination to the master, and proposed
that Peregrine should be forgiven. The superior behaved with that
dignity of demeanour which became his place, represented the folly
and presumption of their demand, reprehended them for their audacious
proceeding, and ordered every boy to his respective station. They obeyed
his command, and our unfortunate hero was publicly horsed, in terrorem
of all whom it might concern.
This disgrace had a very sensible effect upon the mind of Peregrine,
who, having by this time, passed the fourteenth year of his age,
began to adopt the pride and sentiments of a man. Thus dishonourably
stigmatized, he was ashamed to appear in public as usual; he was
incensed against his companions for their infidelity and irresolution,
and plunged into a profound reverie that lasted several weeks, during
which he shook off his boyish connections, and fixed his view upon
objects which he thought more worthy of his attention.
In the course of his gymnastic exercises, at which he was very expert,
he contracted intimacies with several youths who were greatly his
superiors in point of age, and who, pleased with his aspiring genius
and address, introduced him into parties of gallantry which strongly
captivated his inclination. He was by nature particularly adopted
for succeeding in all adventures of this kind: over and above a most
engaging person that improved with his years, he possessed a dignified
assurance, an agreeable ferocity which enhanced the conquest of the fair
who had the good fortune to enslave him, unlimited generosity, and a
fund of humour which never failed to please. Nor was he deficient in
the more solid accomplishments of youth: he had profited in his studies
beyond expectation; and besides that sensibility of discernment which
is the foundation of taste, and in consequence of which he distinguished
and enjoyed the beauties of the classics, he had already given several
specimens of a very promising poetic talent.
With this complexion and these qualifications, no wonder that our hero
attracted the notice and affections of the young Delias in town, whose
hearts had just begun to flutter for they knew not what. Inquiries
were made concerning his condition; and no sooner were his expectations
known, than he was invited and caressed by all the parents, while
the daughters vied with each other in treating him with particular
complacency. He inspired love and emulation wherever he appeared: envy
and jealous rage followed of course; so that he became a very desirable,
though a very dangerous acquaintance. His moderation was not equal to
his success: his vanity took the lead of his passions, dissipating his
attention, which might otherwise have fixed him to one object; and he
was possessed with the rage of increasing the number of his conquests.
With this view he frequented public walks, concerts, and assemblies,
became remarkably rich and fashionable in his clothes, gave
entertainments to the ladies, and was in the utmost hazard of turning
out a most egregious coxcomb.
While his character thus wavered between the ridicule of some and the
regard of others, an accident happened which by contracting his view
to one object, detached him from those vain pursuits that would in time
have plunged him into an abyss of folly and contempt. Being one evening
at the ball which is always given to the ladies at the time of the
races, the person acted as master of the ceremonies, knowing how fond
Mr. Pickle was of every opportunity to display himself, came up, and
told him, that there was a fine young creature at the other end of the
room, who seemed to have a great inclination to dance a minuet, but
wanted a partner, the gentleman who attended her being in boots.
Peregrine's vanity being aroused at this intimation, he went up to
reconnoitre the young lady, and was struck with admiration at her
beauty. She seemed to be of his own age, was tall, though slender,
exquisitely shaped; her hair was auburn, and in such plenty, that the
barbarity of dress had not been able to prevent it from shading both
sides of her forehead, which was high and polished; the contour of her
face was oval; her nose very little raised into the aquiline form,
that contributed to the spirit and dignity of her aspect; her mouth was
small; her lips plump, juicy, and delicious, her teeth regular and white
as driven snow, her complexion incredibly delicate, and glowing with
health; and her full blue eyes beamed forth vivacity and love: her mien
was at the same time commanding and engaging, her address perfectly
genteel, and her whole appearance so captivating, that our young Adonis
looked, and was overcome.
He no sooner recollected himself from his astonishment, than he advanced
to her with a graceful air of respect, and begged she would do him the
honour to walk a minuet with him. She seemed particularly pleased with
his application, and very frankly complied with his request. This pair
was too remarkable to escape the particular notice of the company; Mr.
Pickle was well known by almost everybody in the room, but his partner
was altogether a new face and of consequence underwent the criticism
of all the ladies in the assembly. One whispered, “She has a good
complexion, but don't you think she is a little awry?” a second pitied
her for her masculine nose; a third observed, that she was awkward for
want of seeing company; a fourth distinguished something very bold in
her countenance; and, in short, there was not a beauty in her whole
composition which the glass of envy did not pervert into a blemish.
The men, however, looked upon her with different eyes; among them her
appearance produced a universal murmur of applause: they encircled the
space on which she danced, and were enchanted by her graceful motion.
While they launched out in the praise of her, they expressed their
displeasure at the good fortune of her partner, whom they d--d for a
little finical coxcomb, that was too much engrossed by the contemplation
of his own person, to discern or deserve the favour of his fate. He did
not hear, therefore could not repine at these invectives; but while they
imagined he indulged his vanity, a much more generous passion had taken
possession of his heart.
Instead of that petulance of gaiety for which he had been distinguished
in his public appearance, he now gave manifest signs of confusion and
concern: he danced with an anxiety which impeded his performance,
and blushed to the eyes at every false step he made. Though this
extraordinary agitation was overlooked by the men, it could not escape
the observation of the ladies, who perceived it with equal surprise
and resentment; and when Peregrine led this fair unknown to her seat,
expressed their pique in an affected titter, which broke from every
mouth at the same instant--as if all of them had been informed by the
same spirit.
Peregrine was nettled at this unmannerly mark of disapprobation, and,
in order to increase their chagrin, endeavoured to enter into particular
conversation with their fair rival. The young lady herself, who neither
wanted penetration nor the consciousness of her own accomplishments,
resented their behaviour, though she triumphed at the cause of it, and
gave her partner all the encouragement he could desire. Her mother, who
was present, thanked him for his civility in taking such notice of a
stranger, and he received a compliment of the same nature from the young
gentleman in boots, who was her own brother.
If he was charmed with her appearance, he was quite ravished with
her discourse, which was sensible, spirited, and gay. Her frank and
sprightly demeanour excited his own confidence and good-humour; and he
described to her the characters of those females who had honoured them
with such a spiteful mark of distinction, in terms so replete with
humorous satire, that she seemed to listen with particular complacency
of attention, and distinguished every nymph thus ridiculed with such a
significant glance as overwhelmed her with chagrin and mortification. In
short, they seemed to relish each other's conversation, during which
our young Damon acquitted himself with great skill in all the duties
of gallantry: he laid hold of proper opportunities to express his
admiration of her charms, had recourse to the silent rhetoric of tender
looks, breathed divers insidious sighs, and attached himself wholly to
her during the remaining part of the entertainment.
When the company broke up, he attended her to her lodgings, and
took leave of her with a squeeze of the hand, after having obtained
permission to visit her next morning, and been informed by the mother
that her name was Miss Emilia Gauntlet.
All night long he closed not an eye, but amused himself with plans of
pleasure, which his imagination suggested in consequence of this new
acquaintance. He rose with the lark, adjusted his hair into an agreeable
negligence of curl, and dressing himself in a genteel gray frock trimmed
with silver binding, waited with the utmost impatience for the hour
of ten, which no sooner struck than he hied him to the place of
appointment, and inquiring for Miss gauntlet, was shown into a parlour.
Here he had not waited above ten minutes, when Emilia entered in a most
enchanting undress, with all the graces of nature playing about her
person, and in a moment riveted the chains of his slavery beyond the
power of accident to unbind.
Her mother being still abed, and her brother gone to give orders about
the chaise, in which they proposed to return that same day to their
own habitation, he enjoyed her company a whole hour, during which he
declared his love in the most passionate terms, and begged that he might
be admitted into the number of those admirers whom she permitted to
visit and adore her.
She affected to look upon his vows and protestations as the ordinary
effect of gallantry, and very obligingly assured him that were she to
live in that place she should be glad to see him often; but as the
spot on which she resided was at a considerable distance, she could not
expect he would go so far, upon such a trifling occasion, as to take the
trouble of providing himself with her mamma's permission.
To this favourable hint he with all the eagerness of the most fervent
passion, that he had uttered nothing but the genuine dictates of his
heart; that he desired nothing so much as an opportunity of evincing the
sincerity of his professions; and that, though he lived at the extremity
of the kingdom, he would find means to lay himself at her feet, provided
he could visit her with her mother's consent, which he assured her he
would not fail to solicit.
She then gave him to understand that her habitation was about sixteen
miles from Winchester, in a village which she named, and where, as he
could easily collect from her discourse, he would be no unwelcome guest.
In the midst of this communication they were joined by Mrs. Gauntlet,
who received him with great courtesy, thanking him again for his
politeness to Emy at the ball, and anticipated his intention by saying
that she should be very glad to see him at her house, if ever his
occasions should call him that way.