On entering, I groped about for my knife. I had quite forgotten how or
where I had laid it down. I had already searched for it outside, but
without success; and I concluded that I must have left it behind me in
the cask. I was surprised at not laying my hand upon it at once, for
although I ran my fingers all around the under-side of the vessel,
nothing like a knife did I touch.
I was beginning to feel alarmed about it. It might be lost, and if so,
all hopes of deliverance would be at an end. Without the knife, I could
proceed no farther in any direction, but might lie down inactive to
abide my fate. Where could the knife be? Was it likely that the rats
had carried it off?
I again backed out of the cask, and made a new search outside; but not
finding what I was looking for, I once more crept into the barrel, and
once more felt it all over--that is, every part of it where a knife
could lie.
I was very near going out again, when it occurred to me to raise my
hands a little higher, and examine the bung-hole, at which I had been
working when I last had the knife in my hands. It may be there, thought
I; and to my joy it _was_ there, sticking in the notch I had been
cutting with it.
I set to work, without further delay, to widen the hole crossways; but
the blade, from so much use, had become "dull as a beetle," and my
progress through the hard oaken stave was as slow as if I had been
cutting through a stone. I carved away for a quarter of an hour,
without making the notch the eighth part of an inch deeper; and I almost
despaired of ever getting through the stave.
I now felt the singular influence again coming over me, and could have
remained without much fear, for such is the effect of intoxication; but
I had promised myself that the moment I became aware of any change, I
should retreat from the dangerous spot. Fortunately, I had resolution,
and barely enough, to keep my promise; and, before it was too late, I
dragged myself back to the rear of the water-butt.
It was well I did so at the very time, for had I remained in the
brandy-cask but ten minutes longer, beyond doubt I should have been
hopelessly insensible. As it was, I already felt quite "happy," and
remained so for some time.
But as the alcoholic influence departed, I grew more miserable than
ever; for I now perceived that this unexpected obstacle to my progress
was about to ruin all my hopes. I believed that I could return at
intervals, and go on with the work; but only at long intervals, and now
that the blade of my knife had grown so blunt, I could make but little
progress. It would be days before I should get through the side of the
cask; and days were denied me. The small store of crumbs were sadly
reduced; in fact, I was on my last handful. I had not enough to keep me
alive for three days! The chances of saving my life were growing
narrower with every fresh move, and I was fast giving way to despair.
Had I been sure that after cutting through the cask, I should have found
relief on the other side, I might have contemplated the enterprise with
more eagerness and energy; but this was worse than doubtful. There were
ten chances to one against my finding a box of biscuits, or anything
that was eatable.
One advantage had arisen from my breaking into the brandy-cask, which
now occurred to me in full force. It had given me a large empty space;
and therefore, if I could only get beyond--even though there should not
be a package containing food--still it might be something which I could
remove into the inside of the cask, and thus make way for further
operations.
This was certainly a fresh phase which my situation had assumed; but a
still better idea succeeded, that lent a new and joyous aspect to my
thoughts. It was this: if I could so easily cut my way from box to box,
as I had already proved, _why might I not tunnel upwards, and reach the
deck_?
The thought startled me. It was quite new. It had not occurred to me
before--strangely enough it had not--and I can only explain its tardy
conception by the fact of the confused state of mind in which I had all
along been, and which might have led me to deem such an enterprise an
impossibility.
No doubt there were numberless packages heaped over me, one upon
another. No doubt the hold was quite full of them, and I knew that I
was near the bottom of all. I remembered, too--what had _puzzled_ me at
the time--that the stowage had continued for a long time after I came
aboard; that for two days and nights the work seemed to be going on, and
therefore the whole cargo must have been placed above me. Still,
withal, a dozen large boxes would reach to the top, or, maybe, not half
so many would fill up to the deck. Allowing a day to the cutting
through each one, I might be able to reach the top in about a week or
ten days!
Though a joyful thought, it would have been far more welcome at an
earlier period, but it now came accompanied by the wildest regrets.
Perhaps it had come too late to save me? Had I begun aright, when I had
my full box of biscuits, I might easily have carried the plan into
execution; but now, alas! scarce a morsel remained; and it seemed
hopeless to attempt what I had conceived.
Still, I could not surrender up this alluring prospect of life and
freedom; and, stifling all idle regrets, I gave my mind to its further
consideration.
Time, of course, was now the important matter, and that which caused me
the greatest anxiety. I feared that even before I could accomplish an
opening on the farther side of the empty barrel, my food would be all
consumed, and my strength quite exhausted. Perhaps I should die in the
middle of my work--literally "in the breach."
While pondering thus, another new thought came uppermost in my mind. It
was also a good idea, however horrid it may seem to those who do not
hunger. But hunger and the dread of starvation have the effect of
simplifying the choice of a man's appetite, and under such circumstances
the stomach ceases to be dainty.
Mine had long since lost all niceness; and was no longer squeamish as to
the sort of food I might swallow. In fact, _I could have eaten anything
that was eatable_. And now for the new idea.