There was an exuberant flapper
Who made people anxious to slap her;
She uttered loud squeals
And she smoked at all meals;
Now she's married an elderly sapper.
There was a mild don who was muddy
In mind and complexion by study;
Now he flies fast and far,
With a cross and a bar,
And his face and his language are ruddy.
* * * * *
"BRITISH FRONT REINFORCED.
"BY PERCIVAL PHILLIPS."
_Daily Paper_.
Intrepid fellows, our war correspondents. What a pity there are so few
of them!
* * * * *
"A long, keen dagger will be supplied to every American
infantryman going to France. This weapon will be fitted into
one of the fighting men's leggings when he goes into action,
so he will have something to fall back on should his bayonet
fail."--_Canadian Paper_.
If he's going to fall back on it, we hope the sharp end won't be at
the top.
* * * * *
[Illustration: _The Sub_. "I SAY, SERGEANT-MAJOR, DO YOU REALISE THAT
THAT CHAP WITH THE BARROW IS A MEMBER OF AN ARCHÆOLOGICAL SOCIETY?"
_The Sergeant-Major_. "WELL, SIR, 'E MAY BE WHAT YOU SAY. PERSONALLY
I'VE ALWAYS FOUND 'IM QUIET AND WELL-BE'AVED."]
* * * * *