SHIP-BOARD.
There are few places where the looks and manners of the company are more
minutely scanned than on ship-board; and few where the agreeability of a
lady will be more highly appreciated. There is little or no variety of
objects to attract attention. The passengers are brought so closely into
contact with each other, and confined to so small a neighbourhood, or
rather so many neighbours are crowded into so small a space, that all
their sayings and doings are noticed with unusual attention, by those
who are well enough to regard any thing but themselves. Sea-sickness is
a very selfish malady,--and no wonder that it is so. Fortunately it is
less prevalent than formerly, thanks to the improvements in cabin-room,
ventilation, lodging, food, and many other things connected with
ocean-travelling. A lady who is not of a bilious or dyspeptic habit, and
who has taken precautionary medicine a few days before commencing the
voyage, frequently escapes sea-sickness altogether; or at least gets
well after the first day or two.
It is best not to be over-officious in offering your aid to the sick
ladies, unless they are your intimate friends. The stewardess of a
packet-ship is generally all-sufficient; and much more capable of
attending to their wants than you can be. Sea-sickness renders its
victims very querulous; and few like to be continually reminded of their
condition by enquiries too often repeated of--"How do you find yourself
now?" "Do you feel any better?" or, "Do you think you could not eat
something?" To one very much prostrated by the effects of the
sea-motion, the mere replying to these questions is an additional
misery. Whatever sympathy you may feel, at the time, for those afflicted
with the marine malady, remember that it is a disorder which never
kills, but very frequently cures.
If you are sick yourself, say as little about it as possible. And never
allude to it at table, where you will receive little sympathy, and
perhaps render yourself disgusting to all who hear you. At no time talk
about it to gentlemen. Many foolish common-place sayings are uttered by
ladies who attempt to describe the horrors of sea-sickness. For instance
this--"I felt all the time as if I wished somebody to take me up, and
throw me overboard." This is untrue--no human being ever really _did_
prefer drowning to sea-sickness.
When the ship is actually in danger, this malady is always frightened
away; the feelings of the mind entirely overpowering those of the body.
Try to avoid supposing that every fresh gale is a violent storm; but
confide in the excellence of the ship, and the skill of its navigators.
Yet, though not afraid yourself, remember that others may be so, and do
not try to show your courage by indulging in undue gayety. Mirth is out
of place when the sky is overcast with gloom, the wind blowing hard, and
the waves "running mountains high," and foaming and roaring all round
the vessel.
If there is truly a violent tempest, and if the danger is real and
imminent, trust to that Almighty Power who is with you always,--on the
sea, and on the land; and silently and fervently implore his protection.
No captain likes to be teazed with importunities concerning the probable
length of the passage. You may be sure he will do all he can to make it
as short as possible. In rough weather, refrain from asking, whenever
you see him, "If there is any danger?" If there really is, he will
certainly let you know it in time.
Endeavour to live harmoniously with your fellow-passengers. Avoid such
national allusions as may give offence to the foreigners. If you find
that any of them are in the frequent practice of sneering at your own
country, or speaking of it disrespectfully, repress your resentment,
resort to no recrimination, but refrain from further conversation with
that individual, and leave him to the gentlemen. If a female foreigner
is in the habit of gratuitously abusing America, endeavour calmly to
convince her that her ideas of your country are erroneous. If she will
not be convinced, (as is most likely, if she is an _ungenteel_
Englishwoman,) give up the attempt, and leave her to herself. If you
have a taste for the ridiculous, you will regard her prejudices and the
expression of them only as objects of amusement.
Avoid all arguments with a woman of irritable disposition, lest you are
drawn in yourself to defend your opinion too warmly. You will soon find
whether or not you can convince her, or whether she is likely to
convince you. And it is worse than useless for both to continue
protracting the argument, when they know that the opinion of neither
will be shaken. Also, it is foolish to keep on repeating the same ideas,
with no change but in a few of the words.
Long and turbulent discussions are peculiarly annoying on ship-board,
particularly in rainy weather, when for the weary and pent-up audience,
"there's no door to creep out."
It is certainly advisable for every lady on ship-board to endeavour to
make herself as agreeable as she can, and not to suppose that all her
"whims and oddities" will be excused because she is suffering "the pains
and penalties" of the sea, and is therefore not "a responsible being."
If free from sickness, a lady may propose or promote many pleasant
little amusements and occupations; such as playing children's games on
deck, or taking a part in chess, chequers, and backgammon in the cabin.
Ladies sometimes form a regular little coterie, for assembling at
certain hours, and employing themselves in knitting, bead-work,
light-sewing, &c. while a gentleman reads aloud to them in some
entertaining book. In the evening, vocal concerts will be an agreeable
variety, as there are always some persons on board who can sing. And
when the weather is fine, and the ship steadily laying her course, a
moonlight dance on deck is delightful.
A young lady should improve the opportunity of learning the names of the
principal parts of the ship. It is a silly boast at the end of the
voyage, (and yet we have heard such boasts,) to say that you do not know
the fore-mast from the main-mast; and that you have no idea where the
mizen-mast is, much less the bow-sprit. And even if a fair damsel should
be able to distinguish the fore-topsail from the jib, and to know even
the flying-jib, and have learnt the difference between the compass and
the quadrant, and the log-line and the lead-line, we opine that "the
gentlemen" will think none the worse of her; to say nothing of the
satisfaction it will afford herself to listen with some comprehension to
talk concerning the ship, and to read understandingly a few of the
numerous excellent novels that treat of "life on the ocean wave."
If you have, unfortunately, the rude and unamiable habit of laughing
whenever you see any one get a fall, leave it off when on
ship-board,--where falls are of continual occurrence from the rolling of
the vessel, and the steepness of the stairs. We never could tell why a
fall, even on the ice, should be regarded as a subject of mirth, when
the chance is that it may produce a serious hurt, and is always attended
with some pain or some annoyance at least. Low-bred women always say
they cannot help laughing at such sights. We think _ladies_ ought always
to help it, and hasten at once to the relief of the sufferer, to
ascertain if they are hurt.
Be washed and dressed _neatly_ every day. This can generally be managed
with the assistance of the female servants--even if you _are_ sick.
A piano never sounds well on ship-board--the cabins are too small, and
the ceilings too low. To the sick and nervous, (and all who are sea-sick
become _very_ nervous,) this instrument is peculiarly annoying.
Therefore be kind enough to spare them the annoyance. You can practise
when the weather is fine; and the invalids are on deck. Pianos have been
abolished in many of the finest ships. Such instruments as can be
carried on deck, and played in the open air, are, on the contrary, very
delightful at sea, when in the hands of good performers--particularly on
a moonlight evening.
In going to England, take with you no American reprints of English
books, unless you intend leaving them on board the ship. If you attempt
to land them, they will be seized at the custom-house. American books by
American authors are _not_ prohibited.
Make no attempt to smuggle any thing. You may be detected and disgraced.
The risk is too great, and the advantage too little.
When you leave your state-room to sit in the ladies' cabin, do not fall
to relating the particulars of your sickness, or complaining of the
smallness of your apartment, the rolling of the ship, or the roughness
of the waves. These inconveniences are unavoidable, and must always be
expected in a sea-voyage; and talking about them too much seems to
magnify their evils.
If there is any deficiency in accommodations or attentions, either try
as well as you can to do without them, or in a kind and considerate
manner endeavour to obtain them of the servants, if not too
inconvenient, or against the ship's regulations.
It is very inconsiderate to have things cooked at luncheon time
purposely for yourself. Ladies who are quite well will sometimes order
baked apples, stewed prunes, buttered toast, arrow-root, cups of tea or
coffee, &c.,--notwithstanding that the lunch-table is always profusely
spread with a variety of cold articles; and that when dinner is cooking
at the same time, the small size of the kitchen renders any extra
preparations very inconvenient to the preparers.