(_By our Military Expert._)
The brief statement from Headquarters at Petrograd that on the
South-West front Wszlmysl has fallen and that the pursuit of the
Austrians has reached Mlprknik has a significance that may easily be
overlooked by those who are unfamiliar with the topography of the
district and its pronunciation. Wszlmysl (pronounce Wozzle-mizzle) is a
large fortified town in the district of Mprzt (pronounce Ha-djisha), at
the junction of the rivers Ug (pronounce Oogh) and Odzwl (pronounce
Odol), about ten miles to the N.E. of Ploschkin (pronounce as written),
with which it is connected by an electric tramway. The information
available shows that the garrison of Wszlmysl (pronounce Woolloomoolloo)
deserted their guns and retreated in haste with the Russians in hot
pursuit. Now, inasmuch as this fortress has been pronounced by the
Russian expert, Colonel Shumsky (pronounce Sch-tchoomsky), to be
stronger than either Namur or Liege, the precipitate retirement of the
Austrians can only be accounted for by a complete breakdown of _moral_.
The cause of this breakdown may escape most observers, but it is in
reality simple enough. It has long been known that the Austrians have
found themselves terribly handicapped by their inability to deal
faithfully with the consonantal difficulties presented by the names of
towns and districts in which the ethnic basis is Slav and not Teutonic.
Quite recently, on the capture of the town of Prtnkevichsvtntchiskow
(unpronounceable, and only to be approximately rendered with the
assistance of a powerful Claxon horn), the garrison were found to be in
a deplorable condition of aphasia and suffering from chronic laryngitis.
We have therefore the best grounds for believing that a similar cause
operated in the case of the Austrian defenders of Wszlmysl. They fled
because they were unable to cope with the vocal exigencies of the
situation.
To sum up, we have in our Eastern ally a nation not only great in
numbers, in warlike prowess, and in enthusiasm for their cause, but also
fortified by the possession of a language so rich in phonetic variety
and so formidable in consonantal concentration as to strike terror into
opponents of lesser linguistic capacity.
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