CHAPTER XXXI.

THE BATTLE OF THE BULL-DOGS. PART II.

If it be a distinct point of wisdom to hug the hour that is, then does

dinner amount to a highly intellectual invitation to man, for it

furnishes the occasion; and Britons are the wisest of their race, for

more than all others they take advantage of it. In this Nature is

undoubtedly our guide, seeing that he who, while feasting his body

allows to his soul a thought for the morrow, is in his digestion curst,

and becomes a house of evil humours. Now, though the epicure may

complain of the cold meats, a dazzling table, a buzzing company, blue

sky, and a band of music, are incentives to the forgetfulness of

troubles past and imminent, and produce a concentration of the

faculties. They may not exactly prove that peace is established between

yourself and those who object to your carving of the world, but they

testify to an armistice.

Aided by these observations, you will understand how it was that the

Countess de Saldar, afflicted and menaced, was inspired, on taking her

seat, to give so graceful and stately a sweep to her dress that she was

enabled to conceive woman and man alike to be secretly overcome by it.

You will not refuse to credit the fact that Mr. Raikes threw care to

the dogs, heavy as was that mysterious lump suddenly precipitated on

his bosom; and you will think it not impossible that even the springers

of the mine about to explode should lose their subterranean

countenances. A generous abandonment to one idea prevailed. As for

Evan, the first glass of champagne rushed into reckless nuptials with

the music in his head, bringing Rose, warm almost as life, on his

heart. Sublime are the visions of lovers! He knew he must leave her on

the morrow; he feared he might never behold her again; and yet he

tasted bliss, for it seemed within the contemplation of the Gods that

he should dance with his darling before dark—haply waltz with her! Oh,

heaven! he shuts his eyes, blinded. The band wheels off meltingly in a

tune all cadences, and twirls, and risings and sinkings, and passionate

outbursts trippingly consoled. Ah! how sweet to waltz through life with

the right partner. And what a singular thing it is to look back on the

day when we thought something like it! Never mind: there may be spheres

where it is so managed—doubtless the planets have their Hanwell and

Bedlam.

I confess that the hand here writing is not insensible to the effects

of that first glass of champagne. The poetry of our Countess’s

achievements waxes rich in manifold colours: I see her by the light of

her own pleas to Providence. I doubt almost if the hand be mine which

dared to make a hero play second fiddle, and to his beloved. I have

placed a bushel over his light, certainly. Poor boy! it was enough that

he should have tailordom on his shoulders: I ought to have allowed him

to conquer Nature, and so come out of his eclipse. This shall be said

of him: that he can play second fiddle without looking foolish, which,

for my part, I call a greater triumph than if he were performing the

heroics we are more accustomed to. He has steady eyes, can gaze at the

right level into the eyes of others, and commands a tongue which is

neither struck dumb nor set in a flutter by any startling question. The

best instances to be given that he does not lack merit are that the

Jocelyns, whom he has offended by his birth, cannot change their

treatment of him, and that the hostile women, whatever they may say, do

not think Rose utterly insane. At any rate, Rose is satisfied, and her

self-love makes her a keen critic. The moment Evan appeared, the

sickness produced in her by the Countess passed, and she was ready to

brave her situation. With no mock humility she permitted Mrs. Shorne to

place her in a seat where glances could not be interchanged. She was

quite composed, calmly prepared for conversation with any one. Indeed,

her behaviour since the hour of general explanation had been so

perfectly well-contained, that Mrs. Melville said to Lady Jocelyn:

“I am only thinking of the damage to her. It will pass over—this fancy.

You can see she is not serious. It is mere spirit of opposition. She

eats and drinks just like other girls. You can see that the fancy has

not taken such very strong hold of her.”

“I can’t agree with you,” replied her ladyship. “I would rather have

her sit and sigh by the hour, and loathe roast beef. That would look

nearer a cure.”

“She has the notions of a silly country girl,” said Mrs. Shorne.

“Exactly,” Lady Jocelyn replied. “A season in London will give her

balance.”

So the guests were tolerably happy, or at least, with scarce an

exception, open to the influences of champagne and music. Perhaps

Juliana was the wretchedest creature present. She was about to smite on

both cheeks him she loved, as well as the woman she despised and had

been foiled by. Still she had the consolation that Rose, seeing the

vulgar mother, might turn from Evan: a poor distant hope, meagre and

shapeless like herself. Her most anxious thoughts concerned the means

of getting money to lockup Harry’s tongue. She could bear to meet the

Countess’s wrath, but not Evan’s offended look. Hark to that Countess!

“Why do you denominate this a pic-nic, Lady Jocelyn? It is in verity a

fête!”

“I suppose we ought to lie down à la Grecque to come within the term,”

was the reply. “On the whole, I prefer plain English for such matters.”

“But this is assuredly too sumptuous for a pic-nic, Lady Jocelyn. From

what I can remember, pic-nic implies contribution from all the guests.

It is true I left England a child!”

Mr. George Uplift could not withhold a sharp grimace: The Countess had

throttled the inward monitor that tells us when we are lying, so

grievously had she practised the habit in the service of her family.

“Yes,” said Mrs. Melville, “I have heard of that fashion, and very

stupid it is.”

“Extremely vulgar,” murmured Miss Carrington.

“Possibly,” Lady Jocelyn observed; “but good fun. I have been to

pic-nics, in my day. I invariably took cold pie and claret. I clashed

with half-a-dozen, but all the harm we did was to upset the dictum that

there can be too much of a good thing. I know for certain that the

bottles were left empty.”

“And this woman,” thought the Countess, “this woman, with a soul so

essentially vulgar, claims rank above me!” The reflection generated

contempt of English society, in the first place, and then a passionate

desire for self-assertion.

She was startled by a direct attack which aroused her momentarily

lulled energies.

A lady, quite a stranger, a dry simpering lady, caught the Countess’s

benevolent passing gaze, and leaning forward, said: “I hope her

ladyship bears her affliction as well as can be expected?”

In military parlance, the Countess was taken in flank. Another would

have asked—What ladyship? To whom do you allude, may I beg to inquire?

The Countess knew better. Rapid as light it shot through her that the

relict of Sir Abraham was meant, and this she divined because she was

aware that devilish malignity was watching to trip her.

A little conversation happening to buzz at the instant, the Countess

merely turned her chin to an angle, agitated her brows very gently, and

crowned the performance with a mournful smile. All that a woman must

feel at the demise of so precious a thing as a husband, was therein

eloquently expressed: and at the same time, if explanations ensued,

there were numerous ladyships in the world, whom the Countess did not

mind afflicting, should she be hard pressed.

“I knew him so well!” resumed the horrid woman, addressing anybody. “It

was so sad! so unexpected! but he was so subject to affection of the

throat. And I was so sorry I could not get down to him in time. I had

not seen him since his marriage, when I was a girl!—and to meet one of

his children!—But, my dear, in quinsey, I have heard that there is

nothing on earth like a good hearty laugh.”

Mr. Raikes hearing this, sucked down the flavour of a glass of

champagne, and with a look of fierce jollity, interposed, as if

specially charged by Providence to make plain to the persecuted

Countess his mission and business there: “Then our vocation is at last

revealed to us! Quinsey-doctor! I remember when a boy, wandering over

the paternal mansion, and envying the life of a tinker, which my mother

did not think a good omen in me. But the traps of a Quinsey-doctor are

even lighter. Say twenty good jokes, and two or three of a practical

kind. A man most enviable!”

“It appears,” he remarked aloud to one of the Conley girls, “that

quinsey is needed before a joke is properly appreciated.”

“I like fun,” said she, but had not apparently discovered it.

What did that odious woman mean by perpetually talking about Sir

Abraham? The Countess intercepted a glance between her and the hated

Juliana. She felt it was a malignant conspiracy: still the vacuous

vulgar air of the woman told her that most probably she was but an

instrument, not a confederate, and was only trying to push herself into

acquaintance with the great: a proceeding scorned and abominated by the

Countess, who longed to punish her for her insolent presumption. The

bitterness of her situation stung her tenfold when she considered that

she dared not.

Meantime the champagne became as regular in its flow as the Bull-dogs,

and the monotonous bass of these latter sounded through the music, like

life behind the murmur of pleasure, if you will. The Countess had a not

unfeminine weakness for champagne, and old Mr. Bonner’s cellar was well

and choicely stocked. But was this enjoyment to the Countess?—this

dreary station in the background! “May I emerge?” she as much as

implored Providence.

The petition was infinitely tender. She thought she might, or it may be

that nature was strong, and she could not restrain herself.

Taking wine with Sir John, she said:

“This bowing! Do you know how amusing it is deemed by us Portuguese?

Why not embrace? as the dear Queen used to say to me.”

“I am decidedly of Her Majesty’s opinion,” observed Sir John, with

emphasis, and the Countess drew back into a mingled laugh and blush.

Her fiendish persecutor gave two or three nods. “And you know the

Queen!” she said.

She had to repeat the remark: whereupon the Countess murmured,

“Intimately.”

“Ah, we have lost a staunch old Tory in Sir Abraham,” said the lady,

performing lamentation.

What did it mean? Could design lodge in that empty-looking head with

its crisp curls, button nose, and diminishing simper? Was this pic-nic

to be made as terrible to the Countess by her putative father as the

dinner had been by the great Mel? The deep, hard, level look of Juliana

met the Countess’s smile from time to time, and like flimsy light horse

before a solid array of infantry, the Countess fell back, only to be

worried afresh by her perfectly unwitting tormentor.

“His last days?—without pain? Oh, I hope so!” came after a lapse of

general talk.

“Aren’t we getting a little funereal, Mrs. Perkins?” Lady Jocelyn

asked, and then rallied her neighbours.

Miss Carrington looked at her vexedly, for the fiendish Perkins was

checked, and the Countess in alarm, about to commit herself, was a

pleasant sight to Miss Carrington.

“The worst of these indiscriminate meetings is that there is no

conversation,” whispered the Countess, thanking Providence for the

relief.

Just then she saw Juliana bend her brows at another person. This was

George Uplift, who shook his head, and indicated a shrewd-eyed, thin,

middle-aged man, of a lawyer-like cast; and then Juliana nodded, and

George Uplift touched his arm, and glanced hurriedly behind for

champagne. The Countess’s eyes dwelt on the timid young squire most

affectionately. You never saw a fortress more unprepared for dread

assault.

“Hem!” was heard, terrific. But the proper pause had evidently not yet

come, and now to prevent it the Countess strained her energies and

tasked her genius intensely. Have you an idea of the difficulty of

keeping up the ball among a host of ill-assorted, stupid country

people, who have no open topics, and can talk of nothing continuously

but scandal of their neighbours, and who, moreover, feel they are not

up to the people they are mixing with? Darting upon Seymour Jocelyn,

the Countess asked touchingly for news of the partridges. It was like

the unlocking of a machine. Seymour was not blythe in his reply, but he

was loud and forcible; and when he came to the statistics—oh, then you

would have admired the Countess!—for comparisons ensued, braces were

enumerated, numbers given were contested, and the shooting of this one

jeered at, and another’s sure mark respectfully admitted. And how lay

the coveys? And what about the damage done by last winter’s floods? And

was there good hope of the pheasants? Outside this latter the Countess

hovered. Twice the awful “Hem!” was heard. She fought on. She kept them

at it. If it flagged she wished to know this or that, and finally

thought that, really, she should like herself to try one shot. The

women had previously been left behind. This brought in the women. Lady

Jocelyn proposed a female expedition for the morrow.

“I believe I used to be something of a shot, formerly,” she said.

“You peppered old Tom once, my lady,” remarked Andrew, and her ladyship

laughed, and that foolish Andrew told the story, and the Countess, to

revive her subject, had to say: “May I be enrolled to shoot?” though

she detested and shrank from fire-arms.

“Here are two!” said the hearty presiding dame. “Ladies, apply

immediately to have your names put down.”

The possibility of an expedition of ladies now struck Seymour vividly,

and said he: “I’ll be secretary”; and began applying to the ladies for

permission to put down their names. Many declined, with brevity,

muttering, either aloud or to themselves, “unwomanly”; varied by

“unladylike”: some confessed cowardice; some a horror of the noise

close to their ears; and there was the plea of nerves. But the names of

half-a-dozen ladies were collected, and then followed much laughter,

and musical hubbub, and delicate banter. So the ladies and gentlemen

fell one and all into the partridge pit dug for them by the Countess:

and that horrible “Hem!” equal in force and terror to the roar of

artillery preceding the charge of ten thousand dragoons, was

silenced—the pit appeared impassable. Did the Countess crow over her

advantage? Mark her: the lady’s face is entirely given up to

partridges. “English sports are so much envied abroad,” she says: but

what she dreads is a reflection, for that leads off from the point. A

portion of her mind she keeps to combat them in Lady Jocelyn and others

who have the tendency: the rest she divides between internal-prayers

for succour, and casting about for another popular subject to follow

partridges. Now, mere talent, as critics say when they are lighting

candles round a genius, mere talent would have hit upon pheasants as

the natural sequitur, and then diverged to sports—a great theme, for it

ensures a chorus of sneers at foreigners, and so on probably to a

discussion of birds and beasts best adapted to enrapture the palate of

man. Stories may succeed, but they are doubtful, and not to be trusted,

coming after cookery. After an exciting subject which has made the

general tongue to wag, and just enough heated the brain to cause it to

cry out for spiced food—then start your story: taking care that it be

mild; for one too marvellous stops the tide, the sense of climax being

strongly implanted in all bosoms. So the Countess told an anecdote—one

of Mel’s. Mr. George Uplift was quite familiar with it, and knew of one

passage that would have abashed him to relate “before ladies.” The

sylph-like ease with which the Countess floated over this foul abysm

was miraculous. Mr. George screwed his eye-lids queerly, and closed his

jaws with a report, completely beaten. The anecdote was of the

character of an apologue, and pertained to game. This was, as it

happened, a misfortune; for Mr. Raikes had felt himself left behind by

the subject; and the stuff that was in this young man being naturally

ebullient, he lay by to trip it, and take a lead. His remarks brought

on him a shrewd cut from the Countess, which made matters worse; for a

pun may also breed puns, as doth an anecdote. The Countess’s stroke was

so neat and perfect that it was something for the gentlemen to think

over; and to punish her for giving way to her cleverness and to petty

vexation, “Hem!” sounded once more, and then: “May I ask you if the

present Baronet is in England?”

Now Lady Jocelyn perceived that some attack was directed against her

guest. She allowed the Countess to answer:

“The eldest was drowned in the Lisbon waters.”

And then said: “But who is it that persists in serving up the funeral

baked meats to us?”

Mrs. Shorne spoke for her neighbour: “Mr. Farnley’s cousin was the

steward of Sir Abraham Harrington’s estates.”

The Countess held up her head boldly. There is a courageous exaltation

of the nerves known to heroes and great generals in action when they

feel sure that resources within themselves will spring up to the

emergency, and that over simple mortals success is positive.

“I had a great respect for Sir Abraham,” Mr. Farnley explained, “very

great. I heard that this lady” (bowing to the Countess) “was his

daughter.”

Lady Jocelyn’s face wore an angry look, and Mrs. Shorne gave her the

shade of a shrug and an expression implying, “I didn’t!”

Evan was talking to Miss Jenny Graine at the moment rather earnestly.

With a rapid glance at him, to see that his ears were closed, the

Countess breathed:

“Not the elder branch!—Cadet!”

The sort of noisy silence produced by half-a-dozen people respirating

deeply and moving in their seats was heard. The Countess watched Mr.

Farnley’s mystified look, and whispered to Sir John: “Est-ce qu’il

comprenne le Français, lui?”

It was the final feather-like touch to her triumph. She saw safety and

a clear escape, and much joyful gain, and the pleasure of relating her

sufferings in days to come. This vista was before her when, harsh as an

execution bell, telling her that she had vanquished man, but that

Providence opposed her, “Mrs. Melchisedec Harrington!” was announced to

Lady Jocelyn.

Perfect stillness reigned immediately, as if the pic-nic had heard its

doom.

“Oh! I will go to her,” said her ladyship, whose first thought was to

spare the family. “Andrew, come and give me your arm.”

But when she rose Mrs. Mel was no more than the length of an arm from

her elbow.

In the midst of the horrible anguish she was enduring, the Countess

could not help criticizing her mother’s curtsey to Lady Jocelyn. Fine,

but a shade too humble. Still it was fine; all might not yet be lost.

“Mama!” she softly exclaimed, and thanked heaven that she had not

denied her parent.

Mrs. Mel did not notice her or any of her children. There was in her

bosom a terrible determination to cast a devil out of the one she best

loved. For this purpose, heedless of all pain to be given, or of

impropriety, she had come to speak publicly, and disgrace and

humiliate, that she might save him from the devils that had ruined his

father.

“My lady,” said the terrible woman, thanking her in reply to an

invitation that she should be seated, “I have come for my son. I hear

he has been playing the lord in your house, my lady. I humbly thank

your ladyship for your kindness to him, but he is nothing more than a

tailor’s son, and is bound a tailor himself that his father may be

called an honest man. I am come to take him away.”

Mrs. Mel seemed to speak without much effort, though the pale flush of

her cheeks showed that she felt what she was doing. Juliana was pale as

death, watching Rose. Intensely bright with the gem-like light of her

gallant spirit, Rose’s eyes fixed on Evan. He met them. The words of

Ruth passed through his heart. But the Countess, who had given Rose to

Evan, and the Duke to Caroline, where was her supporter? The Duke was

entertaining Caroline with no less dexterity, and Rose’s eyes said to

Evan: “Feel no shame that I do not feel!” but the Countess stood alone.

It is ever thus with genius! to quote the numerous illustrious authors

who have written of it.

What mattered it now that in the dead hush Lady Jocelyn should assure

her mother that she had been misinformed, and that Mrs. Mel was

presently quieted, and made to sit with others before the fruits and

wines? All eyes were hateful—the very thought of Providence confused

her brain. Almost reduced to imbecility, the Countess imagined, as a

reality, that Sir Abraham had borne with her till her public

announcement of relationship, and that then the outraged ghost would no

longer be restrained, and had struck this blow.

The crushed pic-nic tried to get a little air, and made attempts at

conversation. Mrs. Mel sat upon the company with the weight of all

tailordom.

And now a messenger came for Harry. Everybody was so zealously employed

in the struggle to appear comfortable under Mrs. Mel, that his

departure was hardly observed. The general feeling for Evan and his

sisters, by their superiors in rank, was one of kindly pity. Laxley,

however, did not behave well. He put up his glass and scrutinized Mrs.

Mel, and then examined Evan, and Rose thought that in his interchange

of glances with any one there was a lurking revival of the scene gone

by. She signalled with her eyebrows for Drummond to correct him, but

Drummond had another occupation. Andrew made the diversion. He

whispered to his neighbour, and the whisper went round, and the laugh;

and Mr. Raikes grew extremely uneasy in his seat, and betrayed an

extraordinary alarm. But he also was soon relieved. A messenger had

come from Harry to Mrs. Evremonde, bearing a slip of paper. This the

lady glanced at, and handed it to Drummond. A straggling pencil had

traced these words:

“Just running by S.W. gates—saw the Captain coming in—couldn’t stop to

stop him—tremendous hurry—important. Harry J.”

Drummond sent the paper to Lady Jocelyn. After her perusal of it a

scout was despatched to the summit of Olympus, and his report

proclaimed the advance in the direction of the Bull-dogs of a smart

little figure of a man in white hat and white trousers, who kept

flicking his legs with a cane.

Mrs. Evremonde rose and conferred with her ladyship an instant, and

then Drummond took her arm quietly, and passed round Olympus to the

East, and Lady Jocelyn broke up the sitting.

Juliana saw Rose go up to Evan, and make him introduce her to his

mother. She turned lividly white, and went to a corner of the park by

herself, and cried bitterly.

Lady Jocelyn, Sir Franks, and Sir John, remained by the tables, but

before the guests were out of ear-shot, the individual signalled from

Olympus presented himself.

“There are times when one can’t see what else to do but to lie,” said

her ladyship to Sir Franks, “and when we do lie the only way is to lie

intrepidly.”

Turning from her perplexed husband, she exclaimed:

“Ah! Lawson?”

Captain Evremonde lifted his hat, declining an intimacy.

“Where is my wife, madam?”

“Have you just come from the Arctic Regions?”

“I have come for my wife, madam!”

His unsettled grey eyes wandered restlessly on Lady Jocelyn’s face. The

Countess standing near the Duke, felt some pity for the wife of that

cropped-headed, tight-skinned lunatic at large, but deeper was the

Countess’s pity for Lady Jocelyn, in thinking of the account she would

have to render on the Day of Judgement, when she heard her ladyship

reply—

“Evelyn is not here.”

Captain Evremonde bowed profoundly, trailing his broad white hat along

the sward.

“Do me the favour to read this, madam,” he said, and handed a letter to

her.

Lady Jocelyn raised her brows as she gathered the contents of the

letter.

“Ferdinand’s handwriting!” she exclaimed.

“I accuse no one, madam,—I make no accusation. I have every respect for

you, madam,—you have my esteem. I am sorry to intrude, madam, an

intrusion is regretted. My wife runs away from her bed, madam, and I

have the law, madam, the law is with the husband. No force!” He lashed

his cane sharply against his white legs. “The law, madam. No brute

force!” His cane made a furious whirl, cracking again on his legs, as

he reiterated, “The law!”

“Does the law advise you to strike at a tangent all over the country in

search for her?” inquired Lady Jocelyn.

Captain Evremonde became ten times more voluble and excited.

Mrs. Mel was heard by the Countess to say: “Her ladyship does not know

how to treat madmen.”

Nor did Sir Franks and Sir John. They began expostulating with him.

“A madman gets madder when you talk reason to him,” said Mrs. Mel.

And now the Countess stepped forward to Lady Jocelyn, and hoped she

would not be thought impertinent in offering her opinion as to how this

frantic person should be treated. The case indeed looked urgent. Many

gentlemen considered themselves bound to approach and be ready in case

of need. Presently the Countess passed between Sir Franks and Sir John,

and with her hand put up, as if she feared the furious cane, said:

“You will not strike me?”

“Strike a lady, madam?” The cane and hat were simultaneously lowered.

“Lady Jocelyn permits me to fetch for you a gentleman of the law. Or

will you accompany me to him?”

In a moment, Captain Evremonde’s manners were subdued and civilized,

and in perfectly sane speech he thanked the Countess and offered her

his arm. The Countess smilingly waved back Sir John, who motioned to

attend on her, and away she went with the Captain, with all the glow of

a woman who feels that she is heaping coals of fire on the heads of her

enemies.

Was she not admired now?

“Upon my honour,” said Lady Jocelyn, “they are a remarkable family,”

meaning the Harringtons.

What farther she thought she did not say, but she was a woman who

looked to natural gifts more than the gifts of accidents; and Evan’s

chance stood high with her then. So the battle of the Bull-dogs was

fought, and cruelly as the Countess had been assailed and wounded, she

gained a victory; yea, though Demogorgon, aided by the vindictive ghost

of Sir Abraham, took tangible shape in the ranks opposed to her. True,

Lady Jocelyn, forgetting her own recent intrepidity, condemned her as a

liar; but the fruits of the Countess’s victory were plentiful. Drummond

Forth, fearful perhaps of exciting unjust suspicions in the mind of

Captain Evremonde, disappeared altogether. Harry was in a mess which

threw him almost upon Evan’s mercy, as will be related. And, lastly,

Ferdinand Laxley, that insufferable young aristocrat, was thus spoken

to by Lady Jocelyn.

“This letter addressed to Lawson, telling him that his wife is here, is

in your handwriting, Ferdinand. I don’t say you wrote it—I don’t think

you could have written it. But, to tell you the truth, I have an

unpleasant impression about it, and I think we had better shake hands

and not see each other for some time.”

Laxley, after one denial of his guilt, disdained to repeat it. He met

her ladyship’s hand haughtily, and, bowing to Sir Franks, turned on his

heel.

So, then, in glorious complete victory, the battle of the Bull-dogs

ended!

Of the close of the pic-nic more remains to be told.

For the present I pause, in observance of those rules which demand that

after an exhibition of consummate deeds, time be given to the spectator

to digest what has passed before him.

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