And right there in my own chamber where she had been coming since my
mother's illness, we knelt and prayed.
When we arose, I said, "I want to be baptized and become a
Christian."
"You are a Christian now, my dear," she said.
"But I want the world to know it," I affirmed.
"That is right and brave," she answered, "but you must count the
cost first."
Then she sat down beside me and gently told me what I would have to
bear if I publicly took the name of Christ. She said that there were
not more than twenty-five Parsi Christians in the whole world. She
said that probably I would be turned out of my home, that my
relatives would count me as dead, that all my wealth would be taken
from me and that I would not have one anna for myself or my child.
"Think of your child! Think of yourself! I cannot urge you to do it.
You must decide for yourself."
I answered quickly, "I have thought of myself. I have thought of my
child. She must be a Christian and be brought up as such. Miss
Miller, I have decided for myself. Jesus will take care of us. I
know it in my heart for He tells me so."
So I made my decision and she said no more, but I knew she was
pleased by the smile that she gave me. I would not wait for one
instant lest influences might be brought to bear which I could not
resist and I might be prevented from declaring my desire and
fulfilling it. I took Miss Miller's hand and we went at once to my
mother's room. She was not dangerously ill. When she heard my
determination to become a Christian, she sent for my father from his
study. Together they listened as I told all again.
"Is that decision final, my daughter?" asked my father at last, a
man always of few words.
"It is," I answered with a heart yearning towards them but firm.
"Then you must go from our home, from our family. You and yours can
no longer be a part of us in any way. You will receive nothing from
us for your support.--You are dead to us.--If you repent of this
folly," he added, turning back from the door towards which he had
started with bowed head, "communicate with me and half of my fortune
will be yours. But if you persist in this strange conduct," his
voice grew very stern, "in ten minutes you and yours must be gone
from this house."
I tried to kiss my mother good-bye but her face was turned from me
towards the wall.
I returned to my apartment, took my child, my belongings and a few
relics of my husband and our happy life together and within ten
minutes I had left my home, perhaps forever,--but I don't think so.
I believe that some day God will send me back to them at their own
request; for they will yet believe as I do, I feel assured.
Miss Miller took me to her own home and trained me. I have been a
Bible woman for six months now and Christians in America pay my
salary. By a scholarship they also help me support and educate my
daughter in a Christian school.
Am I not sorry? Look at me! I used to ride always in the first-class
carriage; my saris were of silk and my borders embroidered with
gold; but there was sorrow in my heart. Now, I may sit on a hard
bench, crowded by dirty Hindus and my clothes may be of the cheapest
cotton, but I am happy, for Christ has put joy into my life and into
the life to come. He has also given me something important to do for
Him. The lives of most of our Indian women are so empty! In the
first-class carriage I used to have few fellow travellers; now in
the third I have many, sad, needy women to whom I can tell the great
story of which my own story is only a dim reflection. And to some of
these women in the last six months God has given me the joy of
revealing His love through Jesus Christ.
Well, if here isn't our station! Hasn't the time flown!