SLEIGHT-OF-HAND AT THE EXPENSE OF MY FEET--FILLING A MAN'S POCKETS AS
GREAT AN OFFENCE AS PICKING THEM, AND PUNISHED ACCORDINGLY--A TURN OUT,
A TURN UP, AND A TURN IN--EARLY IMPRESSIONS REMOVED, AND REDUNDANCY OF
FEELING CORRECTED BY A SPELL OF THE RATTAN.
I did not quit Mr Knapps until I had run through the alphabet, and then
returned to my place, that I might con it over at my leisure, puzzling
myself with the strange complexity of forms of which the alphabet was
composed. I felt heated and annoyed by the constraint of my shoes,
always an object of aversion from the time I had put them on. I drew my
foot out of one, then out of the other, and thought no more of them for
some time. In the meanwhile the boys next me had passed them on with
their feet to the others, and thus were they shuffled along until they
were right up to the master's desk. I missed them, and perceiving that
there was mirth at my expense, I narrowly and quietly watched up and
down till I perceived one of the head boys of the school, who sat
nearest the Dominie, catch up one of my shoes, and the Dominie being
then in an absent fit, drop it into his coat-pocket. A short time
afterwards he got up, went to Mr Knapps, put a question to him, and
while it was being answered, he dropped the other into the pocket of the
usher, and tittering to the other boys, returned to his seat. I said
nothing; but when the hours of school were over, the Dominie looked at
his watch, blew his nose, which made the whole of the boys pop up their
heads, like the clansmen of Roderick Dhu, when summoned by his horn,
folded up his large pocket-hankerchief slowly and reverently, as if it
were a banner, put it into his pocket, and uttered in a solemn tone,
"_Tempus est ludendi_." As this Latin phrase was used every day at the
same hour, every boy in the school understood so much Latin. A rush
from all the desks ensured, and amidst shouting, yelling, and leaping
every soul disappeared except myself, who remained fixed to my form.
The Dominie rose from his pulpit and descended, the usher did the same,
and both approached me on their way to their respective apartments.
"Jacob Faithful, why still porest thou over thy book--didst thou not
understand that the hours of recreation had arrived? Why risest thou
not upon thy feet like the others?"
"'Cause I've got no shoes."
"And where are thy shoes, Jacob?"
"One's in your pocket," replied I "and t'other's in his'n."
Each party placed their hands behind, and felt the truth of the
assertion.
"Expound, Jacob," said the Dominie, "who hath done this?"
"The big boy with the red hair, and a face picked all over with holes
like the strainers in master's kitchen," replied I.
"Mr Knapps, it would be _infra dig_ on my part, and also on yours, to
suffer this disrespect to pass unnoticed. Ring in the boys."
The boys were rung in, and I was desired to point out the offender,
which I immediately did, and who as stoutly denied the offence; but he
had abstracted my shoe-strings, and put them into his own shoes. I
recognised them and it was sufficient.
"Barnaby Bracegirdle," said the Dominie, "thou art convicted, not only
of disrespect towards me and Mr Knapps, but further of the grievous sin
of lying. Simon Swapps, let him be hoisted."
He was hoisted: his nether garments descended, and then the birch
descend with all the vigour of the Dominie's muscular arm. Barnaby
Bracegirdle showed every symptom of his disapproval of the measures
taken; but Simon Swapps held fast, and the Dominie flogged fast. After
a minute's flagellation, Barnaby was let down, his yellow tights pulled
up, and the boys dismissed. Barnaby's face was red, but the antipodes
were redder. The Dominie departed, leaving us together,--he adjusting
his inexpressibles, I putting in my shoe-strings. By the time Barnaby
had buttoned up and wiped his eyes, I had succeeded in standing in my
shoes. There we were _tete-a-tete_.
"Now, then," said Barnaby, holding one fist to my face, while, with the
other open hand he rubbed behind, "come out in the play-ground, Mr
_Cinderella_, and see if I won't drub you within an inch of your life."
"It's no use crying," said I, soothingly: for I had not wished him to be
flogged. "What's done can't be helped. Did it hurt you much?"
This intended consolation was taken for sarcasm. Barnaby stormed.
"Take it coolly," observed I.
Barnaby waxed even more wroth.
"Better luck next time," continued I, trying to soothe him.
Barnaby was outrageous--he shook his fist and ran into the play-ground,
daring me to follow him. His threats had no weight with me; not wishing
to remain indoors, I followed him in a minute or two, when I found him
surrounded by the other boys, to whom he was in loud and vehement
harangue.
"Cinderella, where's your glass slippers?" cried the boys, as I made my
appearance.
"Come out, you water-rat," cried Barnaby, "you son of a cinder!"
"Come out and fight him, or else you're a coward!" exclaimed the whole
host, from Number 1 to Number 62, inclusive.
"He has had beating enough already to my mind," replied I; "but he had
better not touch me--I can use my arms."
A ring was formed, in the centre of which I found Barnaby and myself.
He took off his clothes, and I did the same. He was much older and
stronger than I, and knew something about fighting. One boy came
forward as my second. Barnaby advanced and held out his hand, which I
shook heartily, thinking it was all over: but immediately received a
right and left on the face, which sent me reeling backwards. This was a
complete mystery, but it raised my bile, and I returned it with
interest. I was very strong in my arms, as may be supposed; and I threw
them about like sails of a windmill, never hitting straight out, but
with semicircular blows, which descended on or about his ears. On the
contrary, his blows were all received straightforward, and my nose and
face were soon covered with blood. As I warmed with pain and rage I
flung out my arms at random, and Barnaby gave me a knock-down blow. I
was picked up and sat upon my second's knee, who whispered to me as I
spat the blood out of my mouth, "Take it coolly, and make sure when you
hit."
My own--my father's maxim--coming from another, it struck with double
force, and I never forgot it during the remainder of the fight. Again
we were standing up face to face; again I received it right and left,
and returned it upon his right and left ears. Barnaby rushed in--I was
down again.
"Better luck next time," said I to my second, as cool as a cucumber.
A third and a fourth round succeeded, all apparently in Barnaby's
favour, but really in mine. My face was beat to a mummy, but he was
what is termed groggy, from the constant return of blows on the side of
the head. Again we stood up panting and exhausted. Barnaby rushed at
me, and I avoided him: before he could return to the attack I had again
planted two severe blows upon his ears, and he reeled. He shook his
head, and with his fists in the attitude of defence, asked me whether I
had had enough.
"_He_ has," said my second; "stick to him now, Jacob, and you'll beat
him."
I did stick to him; three or four more blows applied to the same part
finished him, and he fell senseless on the ground.
"You've settled him," cried my second.
"What's done can't be helped," replied I. "Is he dead?"
"What's all this?" cried Mr Knapps, pressing his way through the crowd,
followed by the matron.
"Barnaby and Cinderella having it out, sir," said one of the elder boys.
The matron, who had already taken a liking for me, because I was
good-looking, and because I had been recommended to her care by Mrs
Drummond, ran to me.
"Well," says she, "if the Dominie don't punish that big brute for this,
I'll see whether I'm anybody or not;" and taking me by the hand, she led
me away. In the meantime Mr Knapps surveyed Barnaby, who was still
senseless; and desired the other boys to bring him in and lay him on his
bed. He breathed hard, but still remained senseless, and a surgeon was
sent for, who found it necessary to bleed him copiously. He then, at
the request of the matron, came to me; my features were
indistinguishable, but elsewhere I was all right. As I stripped he
examined my arms.
"It seemed strange," observed he, "that the bigger boy should be so
severely punished; but this boy's arms are like little _sledge-hammers_.
I recommend you," said he to the other boys, "not to fight with him,
for some day or other he'll kill one of you."
This piece of advice was not forgotten by the other boys, and from that
day I was the cock of the school. The name of Cinderella, given me by
Barnaby, in ridicule of my mother's death, was immediately abandoned,
and I suffered no more persecution. It was the custom of the Dominie,
whenever two boys fought, to flog them both; but in this instance it was
not followed up, because I was not the aggressor, and my adversary
narrowly escaped with his life. I was under the matron's care for a
week, and Barnaby under the surgeon's hands for about the same time.
Neither was I less successful in my studies. I learnt rapidly, after I
had conquered the first rudiments; but I had another difficulty to
conquer, which was my habit of construing everything according to my
refined ideas; the force of association had become so strong that I
could not overcome it for a considerable length of time. Mr Knapps
continually complained of my being obstinate, when, in fact, I was
anxious to please as well as to learn. For instance, in spelling, the
first syllable always produced the association with something connected
with my former way of life. I recollect the Dominie once, and only
once, gave me a caning, about a fortnight after I went to the school.