Mrs Grammar once gave a fine ball
To the nine different parts of our speech;
To the short and the tall,
To the stout and the small,
There were pies, plums and puddings for each.
And first little Articles came,
In a hurry to make themselves known--
Fat _A_, _An_, and _The_;
But none of the three
Could stand for a minute alone.
The Adjectives came to announce
That their dear friends the Nouns were at hand,
_Rough_, _rougher_ and _roughest_,
_Tough_, _tougher_ and _toughest_,
_Fat_, _merry_, _good-natured_ and _grand_.
The Nouns were indeed on their way,
Tens of thousands, and more, I should think;
For each name we could utter,
_Shop_, _shoulder_, or _shutter_,
Is a noun: _lady_, _lion_ or _link_.
The Pronouns were hastening fast
To push the Nouns out of their places:
_I_, _thou_, _he_, and _she_,
_You_, _it_, _they_, and _we_,
With their sprightly intelligent faces.
Some cried out, "Make way for the Verbs!
A great crowd is coming in view!"
To _light_ and to _smile_,
To _fight_ and to _bite_,
To _be_, and to _have_, and to _do_.
The Adverbs attended on the Verbs,
Behind as their footmen they ran;
As this, "to fight _badly_,"
And "run _away gladly_,"
Shows how fighting and running were done.
Prepositions came _in_, _by_, and _near_;
With Conjunctions, a wee little band,
As _either_ you _or_ he,
But _neither_ I _nor_ she;
They held their great friends by the hand.
Then, too, with a _hip_, _hip_, _hurrah_!
Rushed in Interjections uproarious;
_Dear me!_ _well-a-day!_
When they saw the display,
"_Ha! Ha!_" they all shouted out, "glorious!"
But, alas! what misfortunes were nigh!
While the fun and the feasting pleased each,
Pounced on them at once
A monster--a Dunce!
And confounded the nine parts of speech!
Help! friends! to the rescue! on you
For aid Verb and Article call;
Oh! give your protection
To poor Interjection,
Noun, Pronoun, Conjunction, and all!