There is a strange deformity
Combined with countless graces,
As often in the ladies' names,
As in the ladies faces;
Some names fit for every age,
Some only fit for youth;
Some passing sweet and musical,
Some horribly uncouth;
Some fit for dames of loftiest grades,
Some only fit for scullery maids
Ann is too plain and common,
And Nancy sounds but ill;
Yet Anna is endurable,
And Annie better still,
There is a grace in Charlotte,
In Eleanor a state,
An elegance in Isabel,
A haughtiness in Kate;
And Sarah is sedate and neat,
And Ellen innocent and sweet
Matilda has a sickly sound,
Fit for a nurse's trade;
Sophie is effeminate,
And Esther sage and staid;
Elizabeth's a matchless name,
Fit for a queen to wear
In castle, cottage, hut, or hall--
A name beyond compare;
And Bess, and Bessie follow well,
But Betsy is detestable.
Maria is too forward,
And Gertrude is too gruff,
Yet, coupled with a pretty face,
Is pretty name enough'
And Adelaide is fanciful,
And Laura is too fine,
But Emily is beautiful,
And Mary is divine
Maud only suits a high-born dame,
And Fanny is a baby name
Eliza is not very choice,
Jane is too blunt and Bold,
And Martha somewhat sorrowful,
And Lucy proud and cold;
Amelia is too light and gay,
Fit for only a flirt;
And Caroline is vain and shy,
And Flora smart and pert;
Louisa is too soft and sleek
But Alice--gentle, chaste and meek
And Harriet is confiding,
And Clara grave and mild.
And Emma is affectionate,
And Janet arch and wild!
And Patience is expressive,
And Grace is cold and rare,
And Hannah warm and dutiful,
And Margaret frank and fair
And Faith, and Hope and Charity
Are heavenly names for sisters three.