diminutive people appeared to me the fairest in the world; and
talking upon the subject with a person of learning there, who was
an intimate friend of mine, he said that my face appeared much
fairer and smoother when he looked on me from the ground, than it
did upon a nearer view, when I took him up in my hand and brought
him close, which he confessed was at first a very shocking sight.
He said "he could discover great holes in my skin; that the stumps
of my beard were ten times stronger than the bristles of a boar,
and my complexion made up of several colors, altogether
disagreeable"; although I must beg leave to say for myself, that I
am as fair as most of my sex and country, and very little
sunburned by all my travels. On the other side, discoursing of
the ladies in that emperor's court, he used to tell me, "one had
freckles, another too wide a mouth, a third too large a nose";
nothing of which I was able to distinguish. I confess this
reflection was obvious enough; which, however, I could not
forbear, lest the reader might think those vast creatures were
actually deformed: for I must do them the justice to say, they are
a comely race of people; and particularly the features of my
master's countenance, although he were but a farmer, when I beheld
him from the height of sixty feet, appeared very well proportioned.
When dinner was done, my master went out to his laborers, and as I
could discover by his voice and gesture gave his wife a strict
charge to take care of me. I was very much tired and disposed to
sleep, which my mistress perceiving, she put me on her own bed,
covered me with a clean white handkerchief, but larger and coarser
than the mainsail of a man-of-war.
I slept about two hours, and dreamed I was at home with my wife
and children, which aggravated my sorrows when I awaked, and found
myself alone, in a vast room, between two and three hundred feet
wide, and about two hundred high, lying in a bed twenty yards
wide. My mistress was gone about her household affairs, and had
locked me in. The bed was eight yards from the floor. I durst not
presume to call; and if I had, it would have been in vain, with
such a voice as mine, at so great a distance as from the room
where I lay to the kitchen where the family kept. While I was
under these circumstances, two rats crept up the curtains, and ran
smelling backward and forward on the bed. One of them came up
almost to my face, whereupon I rose in a fright, and drew out my
hanger to defend myself. These horrible animals had the boldness
to attack me on both sides, and one of them held his forefeet at
my collar; but I had the good fortune to rip up his belly before
he could do me any mischief. He fell down at my feet; and the
other, seeing the fate of his comrade, made his escape, but not
without one good wound on the back, which I gave him as he fled,
and made the blood run trickling from him. After this exploit, I
walked gently to and fro on the bed, to recover my breath and loss
of spirits. These creatures were of the size of a large mastiff,
but infinitely more nimble and fierce; so that if I had taken off
my belt before I went to sleep, I must have infallibly been torn
to pieces and devoured. I measured the tail of the dead rat, and
found it to be two yards long, wanting an inch; but it went
against my stomach to draw the carcass off the bed, where it lay
still bleeding. I observed it had yet some life, but with a strong
slash across the neck, I thoroughly despatched it. Soon after, my
mistress came into the room, who seeing me all bloody, ran and
took me up in her hand. I pointed to the dead rat, smiling, and
making other signs, to show I was not hurt; whereat she was
extremely rejoiced, calling the maid to take up the dead rat with
a pair of tongs, and throw it out of the window. Then she set me
on a table, where I showed her my hanger all bloody, and wiping
it on the lappet of my coat returned it to the scabbard.
I hope the gentle reader will excuse me for dwelling on these and
the like particulars, which, however insignificant they may appear
to grovelling vulgar minds, yet will certainly help a philosopher
to enlarge his thoughts and imagination, and apply them to the
benefit of public as well as private life, which was my sole
design in presenting this, and other accounts of my travels, to
the world; wherein I have been chiefly studious of truth, without
affecting any ornaments of learning or of style. But the whole
scene of this voyage made so strong an impression on my mind, and
is so deeply fixed in my memory, that in committing it to paper I
did not omit one material circumstance; however, upon strict
review, I blotted out several passages of less moment, which were
in my first copy, for fear of being censured as tedious and
trifling, whereof travellers are often, perhaps not without
justice, accused.
SOME OF GULLIVER'S ADVENTURES
By Jonathan Swift
Justly may I say, that I should have lived happy enough in the
country, if my littleness had not exposed me to several ridiculous
and troublesome accidents; some of which I shall venture to
relate. Glumdalclitch often carried me into the gardens of the
court in my smaller box, and would sometimes take me out of it,
and hold me in her hand, or set me down to walk. I remember,
before the dwarf left the queen, he followed us one day into those
gardens, and my nurse having set me down, he and I being close
together, near some dwarf apple-trees, I must needs show my wit,
by a silly allusion between him and the trees, which happens to
hold in their language as it does in ours. Whereupon, the
malicious rogue, watching his opportunity, when I was walking
under one of them, shook it directly over my head, by which a
dozen apples, each of them near as large as a Bristol barrel, came
tumbling about my ears; one of them hit me on the back as I
chanced to stoop, and knocked me down flat on my face; but I
received no other hurt, and the dwarf was pardoned at my desire,
because I had given the provocation.
Another day, Glumdalelitch left me on a smooth grass plot to
divert myself, while she walked at some distance with her
governess. In the meantime, there suddenly fell such a violent
shower of hail, that I was immediately, by the force of it, struck
to the ground; and when I was down, the hailstones gave me such
cruel bangs all over the body, as if I had been pelted with
tennis-balls; however, I made a shift to creep on all fours, and
shelter myself, by lying flat on my face, on the lee-side of a
border of lemon-thyme; but so bruised from head to foot, that I
could not go abroad in ten days. Neither is that at all to be
wondered at, because nature, in that country, observing the same
proportion through all her operations, a hailstone is near
eighteen hundred times as large as one in Europe; which I can
assert upon experience, having been so curious to weigh and
measure them.
But a more dangerous accident happened to me in the same garden,
when my little nurse, believing she had put me in a secure place
(which I often entreated her to do, that I might enjoy my own
thoughts), and having left my box at home, to avoid the trouble of
carrying it, went to another part of the garden with her governess
and some ladies of her acquaintance. While she was absent and out
of hearing, a small white spaniel that belonged to one of the
chief gardeners, having got by accident into the garden, happened
to range near the place where I lay: the dog, following the scent,
came directly up, and taking me in his mouth, ran straight to his
master wagging his tail, and set me gently on the ground. By good
fortune he had been so well taught, that I was carried between his
teeth without the least hurt, or even tearing my clothes. But the
poor gardener, who knew me well, and had a great kindness for me,
was in a terrible fright; he gently took me up in both his hands,
and asked me how I did; but I was so amazed and out of breath,
that I could not speak a word. In a few minutes I came to myself,
and he carried me safe to my little nurse, who, by this time, had
returned to the place where she left me, and was in cruel agonies
when I did not appear, nor answer when she called. She severely
reprimanded the gardener on account of his dog. But the thing was
hushed up, and never known at court, for the girl was afraid of
the queen's anger; and truly, as to myself, I thought it would
not be for my reputation that such a story should go about.
This accident absolutely determined Glumdalclitch never to trust
me abroad for the future out of her sight. I had been long afraid
of this resolution, and therefore concealed from her some little
unlucky adventures, that happened in those times when I was left
by myself. Once a kite, hovering over the garden, made a stoop at
me, and if I had not resolutely drawn my hanger, and run under a
thick espalier, he would have certainly carried me away in his
talons. Another time, walking to the top of a fresh molehill, I
fell to my neck in the hole, through which that animal had cast up
the earth, and coined some lie, not worth remembering, to excuse
myself for spoiling my clothes. I likewise broke my right shin
against the shell of a snail, which I happened to stumble over, as
I was walking alone and thinking of poor England.
I cannot tell whether I were more pleased or mortified to observe,
in those solitary walks, that the smaller birds did not appear to
be at all afraid of me, but would hop about within a yard's
distance, looking for worms and other food, with as much
indifference and security as if no creature at all were near them.
I remember, a thrush had the confidence to snatch out of my hand,
with his bill, a piece of cake that Glumdalclitch had just given
me for my breakfast. When I attempted to catch any of these birds,
they would boldly turn against me, endeavoring to peck my fingers,
which I durst not venture within their reach; and then they would
hop back unconcerned, to hunt for worms or snails, as they did
before. But one day, I took a thick cudgel, and threw it with all
my strength so luckily, at a linnet, that I knocked him down, and
seizing him by the neck with both my hands, ran with him in
triumph to my nurse. However, the bird, who had only been stunned,
recovering himself, gave me so many boxes with his wings, on both
sides of my head and body, though I held him at arm's length, and
was out of the reach of his claws, that I was twenty times
thinking to let him go. But I was soon relieved by one of our
servants, who wrung off the bird's neck, and I had him next day
for dinner, by the queen's command. This linnet, as near as I can
remember, seemed to be somewhat larger than an English swan.
One day, a young gentleman, who was nephew to my nurse's
governess, came and pressed them both to see an execution. It was
of a man who had murdered one of that gentleman's intimate
acquaintance. Glumdalclitch was prevailed on to be of the company,
very much against her inclination, for she was naturally tender-
hearted; and as for myself, although I abhorred such kind of
spectacles, yet my curiosity tempted me to see something that I
thought must be extraordinary. The malefactor was fixed on a chair
upon a scaffold erected for that purpose, and his head cut off at
one blow, with a sword of about forty feet long. The veins and
arteries spouted up such a prodigious quantity of blood, and so
high in the air, that the great fountain at Versailles was not
equal for the time it lasted; and the head, when it fell on the
scaffold floor, gave such a bounce as made me start, although I
were at least half an English mile distant.
The queen, who often used to hear me talk of my sea-voyages, and
took all occasions to divert me when I was melancholy, asked me
whether I understood how to handle a sail or an oar, and whether a
little exercise of rowing might not be convenient for my health? I
answered that I understood both very well: for although my proper
employment had been to be surgeon or doctor to the ship, yet
often, upon a pinch, I was forced to work like a common mariner.
But I could not see how this could be done in their country, where
the smallest wherry was equal to a first-rate man-of-war among us;
and such a boat as I could manage would never live in one of their
rivers. Her Majesty said, if I would contrive a boat, her own
joiner should make it, and she would provide a place for me to
sail in. The fellow was an ingenious workman, and by my
instructions, in ten days, finished a pleasure-boat, with all its
tackling, able conveniently to hold eight Europeans. When it was
finished, the queen was so delighted that she ran with it in her
lap to the king, who ordered it to be put into a cistern full of
water, with me in it, by way of trial; where I could not manage my
two sculls, or little oars, for want of room. But the queen had
before contrived another project. She ordered the joiner to make a
wooden trough of three hundred feet long, fifty broad, and eight
deep; which, being well pitched to prevent leaking, was placed on
the floor along the wall, in an outer room of the palace. It had
a cock near the bottom to let out the water, when it began to
grow stale; and two servants could easily fill it in half an hour.
Here I often used to row for my own diversion, as well as that of
the queen and her ladies, who thought themselves well entertained
with my skill and agility. Sometimes I would put up my sail and
then my business was only to steer, while the ladies gave me a
gale with their fans; and when they were weary, some of their
pages would blow my sail forward with their breath, while I showed
my art by steering starboard or larboard as I pleased. When I had
done, Glumdalclitch always carried back my boat into her closet,
and hung it on a nail to dry.
In this exercise I once met an accident, which had like to have
cost me my life; for, one of the pages having put my boat into the
trough, the governess who attended Glumdalclitch very officiously
lifted me up, to place me in the boat; but I happened to slip
through her fingers, and should infallibly have fallen down forty
feet, upon the floor, if, by the luckiest chance in the world, I
had not been stopped by a corking-pin that stuck in the good
gentlewoman's stomacher; the head of the pin passed between my
shirt and the waistband of my breeches, and thus I was held by the
middle in the air, till Glumdalclitch ran to my relief.
Another time, one of the servants, whose office it was to fill my
trough every third day with fresh water, was so careless to let a
huge frog (not perceiving it) slip out of his pail. The frog lay
concealed till I was put into my boat, but then seeing a resting-
place, climbed up, and made it to lean so much on one side, that I
was forced to balance it with all my weight on the other to
prevent overturning. When the frog was got in, it hopped at once
half the length of the boat, and then over my head, backward and
forward, daubing my face and clothes with its odious slime. The
largeness of its features made it appear the most deformed animal
that can be conceived. However, I desired Glumdalclitch to let me
deal with it alone. I banged it a good while with one of my
sculls, and at last forced it to leap out of the boat.
But the greatest danger I underwent in that kingdom was from a
monkey, who belonged to one of the clerks of the kitchen.
Glumdalclitch had locked me up in her closet, while she went
somewhere upon business, or a visit. The weather being very warm,
the closet window was left open, as well as the windows and door
of my bigger box, in which I usually lived, because of its
largeness and conveniency. As I sat quietly meditating at my
table, I heard something bounce in at the closet-window, and skip
about from one side to the other; whereat, although I was much
alarmed, yet I ventured to look out, but not stirring from my
seat; and then I saw this frolicsome animal frisking and leaping
up and down, till at last he came to my box, which he seemed to
view with great pleasure and curiosity, peeping in at the door and
every window. I retreated to the further corner of my room, or
box; but the monkey, looking in at every side, put me into such a
fright, that I wanted presence of mind to conceal myself under the
bed, as I might easily have done. After some time spent in
peeping, grinning, and chattering, he at last espied me; and
reaching one of his paws in at the door, as a cat does when she
plays with a mouse, although I often shifted place to avoid him,
he at length seized the lappet of my coat (which being made of
that country silk, was very thick and strong), and dragged me out.
He took me up in his right forefoot, and held me as a nurse does a
child; and when I offered to struggle, he squeezed me so hard,
that I thought it more prudent to submit. I have good reason to
believe that he took me for a young one of his own species, by his
often stroking my face very gently with his other paw. In these
diversions he was interrupted by a noise at the closet door, as if
somebody were opening it; whereupon he suddenly leaped up to the
window, at which he had come in, and thence upon the leads and
gutters, walking upon three legs, and holding me in the fourth,
till he clambered up to a roof that was next to ours. I heard
Glumdalclitch give a shriek the moment he was carrying me out. The
poor girl was almost distracted; that quarter of the palace was
all in an uproar; the servants ran for ladders; the monkey was
seen by hundreds in the court, sitting upon the ridge of a
building, holding me like a baby in one of his fore-paws, and
feeding me with the other, by cramming into my mouth some victuals
he had squeezed out of the bag on one side of his chaps, and
patting me when I would not eat; whereat many of the rabble below
could not forbear laughing; neither do I think they justly ought
to be blamed, for, without question, the sight was ridiculous
enough to everybody but myself. Some of the people threw up
stones, hoping to drive the monkey down; but this was strictly
forbidden, or else, very probably, my brains had been dashed out.
The ladders were now applied, and mounted by several men; which
the monkey observing, and finding himself almost encompassed, not
being able to make speed enough with his three legs, let me drop
on a ridge tile, and made his escape. Here I sat for some time,
five hundred yards from the ground, expecting every moment to be
blown down by the wind, or to fall by my own giddiness, and come
tumbling over and over from the ridge to the eaves: but an honest
lad, one of my nurse's footmen, climbed up, and putting me into
his breeches pocket, brought me down--safe.
I was almost choked with the filthy stuff the monkey had crammed
down my throat; but my dear little nurse picked it out of my mouth
with a small needle, and then I fell a-vomiting, which gave me
great relief. Yet I was so weak and bruised in the sides with the
squeezes given me by this odious animal, that I was forced to keep
my bed a fortnight. The king, queen, and all the court, sent every
day to inquire after my health, and her Majesty made me several
visits during my sickness. The monkey was killed, and an order
made that no such animal should be kept about the palace.
When I attended the king after my recovery, to return him thanks
for his favors, he was pleased to rally me a good deal upon this
adventure. He asked me, what my thoughts and speculations were
while I lay in the monkey's paw? how I liked the victuals he gave
me? his manner of feeding? and whether the fresh air on the roof
had sharpened my stomach? He desired to know what I would have
done upon such an occasion in my own country? I told his Majesty,
that in Europe we had no monkeys except such as were brought for
curiosities from other places, and so small that I could deal with
a dozen of them together, if they presumed to attack me. And as
for that monstrous animal, with whom I was so lately engaged (it
was indeed as large as an elephant), if my fears had suffered me
to think so far as to make use of my hanger (looking fiercely, and
clapping my hand upon the hilt, as I spoke) when he poked his paw
into my chamber, perhaps I should have given him such a wound, as
would have made him glad to withdraw it, with more haste than he
put it in. This I delivered in a firm tone, like a person who was
jealous lest his courage should be called in question. However, my
speech produced nothing else beside a loud laughter, which all the
respect due to his Majesty from those about him could not make
them contain. This made me reflect, how vain an attempt it is for
a man to endeavor to do himself honor among those who are out of
all degree of equality or comparison with him. And yet I have seen
the moral of my own behavior very frequently in England since my
return; where a little contemptible varlet, without the least
title to birth, person, wit, or common-sense, shall presume to
look with importance, and put himself upon a foot with the
greatest persons of the kingdom.
GULLIVER ESCAPES FROM THE EAGLE
By Jonathan Swift
Perilous circumstances, from which I had already escaped, inspired
me with a strong impulse that I should some time recover my
liberty, though it was impossible to conjecture by what means, or
to form any project with the least hope of succeeding. The ship in
which I sailed was the first known to be driven within sight of
that coast, and the king had given strict orders, that if at any
time another appeared, it should be taken ashore, and with all its
crew and passengers brought in a tumbrel to Lorbrulgrud. I was
indeed treated with much kindness: I was the favorite of a great
king and queen, and the delight of the whole court; but it was
upon such a foot as ill became the dignity of human-kind. I could
never forget these domestic pledges I had left behind me. I wanted
to be among people with whom I could converse upon even terms, and
walk about the streets and fields without being afraid of being
trod to death like a frog or a young puppy. But my deliverance
came sooner than I expected, and in a manner not very common: the
whole story and circumstances of which I shall faithfully relate.
I had now been two years in the country: and about the beginning
of the third, Glumdalclitch and I attended the king and queen, in
a progress to the south coast of the kingdom. I was carried as
usual, in my travelling box, which, as I have already described,
was a very convenient closet of twelve feet wide. And I had
ordered a hammock to be fixed, by silken ropes, from the four
corners at the top, to break the jolts when a servant carried me
before him on horseback, as I sometimes desired; and would often
sleep in my hammock, while we were upon the road. On the roof of
my closet, not directly over the middle of the hammock, I ordered
the joiner to cut a hole of a foot square, to give me air in hot
weather as I slept; which hole I shut at pleasure, with a board
that drew backward and forward through a groove.