In the land of Morning Radiance, where the family names have only one
syllable, such as Kim, Yi, Pil, Wun, Hap, etc., they wear shoes, but
these are not made of black leather. The people neither stand up on
wooden clogs as in Japan, nor case their feet in straight soled
gaiters, without heels, as in China. The gentlemen put on white socks
with tough hide soles, and the ladies don dainty slippers with the
pointed toes turned up. Common folks’ sandals are made chiefly of straw
and twine and it takes a good deal of cordage to complete a pair.
Now there once lived under an old stone below a persimmon tree a fair
young creature named Miss Thousand Feet. She wore lead-colored clothes
and had so many toes to take care of that any one who tried to count
them soon got tired; so he stopped and called the whole amount a
thousand, which was a number as round as herself. She was as proud of
each one of her many little feet as a Chinese lady, who has only two of
them. Miss Thousand Feet was very modest, however, and if any one
stepped on her toes, or touched her, she curled up, first into a ring
and then into a ball, so that men, by a pun on her family name, called
her “a pill millipede,” for she belonged to the Pil family, one of the
most famous in all Korea.
Miss Thousand Feet was very happy living under a damp stone in the cool
earth and she played a good deal. But by and by, when she grew up, her
parents told her it was time for her to get married. So they looked
around, to see if any gentleman in the whole creation was worthy of
her, not only to make a suitable husband, but also a good match.
Now in another village lived a rich, fat, young and promising male
creature, named Mr. Long Body, of the Wum family. His business was to
eat his way through the ground, and pile up little curled heaps of mud
on the surface, and at this work he was kept very busy. He had to look
out for the birds, for they enjoyed eating folks like him, he was so
soft and sweet. Constant exercise in moving through the ground kept his
body shining, so that altogether, as earthworms go, he was quite
handsome and considered a good catch for Miss Thousand Feet.
Furthermore, as he had no feet and she had so many, while his body was
long and hers quite short, it was supposed that one would make up where
the other lacked and that both would be happy together as husband and
wife.
Mr. Long Body, when he heard of the charms of Miss Thousand Feet, was
of the same opinion. All his friends were pairing off, the males
bringing home their brides to their fathers’ houses and setting up
housekeeping. As he had come of age, he also determined to marry.
So he sent letters and opened the business, according to Korean
etiquette, through a “go-between,” as the lady who arranges marriages
is called. This person goes to see each of the two families, praising
to one the beauty and graces of the promised bride and to the other the
strength and wealth of the future husband. Indeed, she gives both of
them a very good character. Finally the “six proprieties,” or “half
dozen rules,” had been completed and the engagement of Mr. Wum and Miss
Pil was announced.
What a clatter of gossip was at once heard in both villages! No one
ever thought that such a handsome fellow as Mr. Long Body Wum would
ever marry into the Pil family. Some jealous folks hinted that Mr. Long
Body, if he took a wife with a thousand feet, would never be able to
pay his shoemaker. On the other hand, so long as his bride would be
content with plain twine shoes all might go well; but for extra
occasions, or if his wife were extravagant and wanted lady’s turned up
house foot-gear made of red morocco such as only the rich folks
wear,—well there would be trouble in the household. How could he keep
her in shoes? Other persons, however, who knew that the Pils were
famous people, wondered how Mr. Wum ever managed to get such a prize as
Miss Pil.
In the other village, the tongues of the gossips ran on in much the
same way. What did she see to admire in that fellow without legs? When
the honeymoon would be over and it came to making gentleman’s clothes
for her husband, had she any skill with the needle? Could she make a
long coat and one trouser leg big enough to fit him? And think of the
many days of work necessary to cut and sew the garment, to say nothing
of weary hours to be spent in washing, starching and giving a gloss to
such clothes. The idea! Why, she would have to be nothing but a slave.
As her husband’s semptress, tailor, and laundress she would get no
rest. Think of washing, starching, and beating to a fine gloss the
one-legged trousers, which Mr. Wum would often have to change; for he
lived in the dirt!
Now, Mr. Long Body Wum was so busy with his work of excavating the
ground that he had no time to pay attention to the village
chatterboxes. Miss Pil, however, couldn’t help hearing what the women
and others said about her, and especially the talk concerning the
terribly hard duties that awaited her if she took a husband. While Mr.
Wum kept digging at the tunnel three yards long, which he was
excavating underground, so as to save up and be ready for his wedding,
Miss Pil brooded over what the gossips talked about and over those
awfully long coats and one-legged trousers she would be obliged to sit
up at nights to make, wash, starch and gloss. Already she imagined her
arms tired in anticipation of starching and beating on the Korean
lustre, without which no gentleman in the Land of Morning Calm ever
goes outdoors. If his coat didn’t have that fashionable shine which
long beating gives, the women would notice it immediately and pretty
soon the men also.
Miss Pil’s broodings night and day over the matter did not help
affairs, and finally wore upon her nerves. She refused to prepare her
own trousseau, and despite all her friends told her in praise of Mr.
Long Body Wum, she decided to write a letter to him, telling him that
on account of his long trunk without limbs, and the great labor
necessary to make him proper clothing and of starching and glossing it,
to say nothing of keeping it in order, she felt unable to hold to the
marriage engagement and must break it off.
But before she had dropped the water on the ink stone and begun to rub
up the ink, or taken brush-pen and paper in hand, Mr. Long Body had got
wind of her complaining and it worried him. Why should he marry one who
didn’t want him?
Then, as he thought it over, being a very thrifty and economical
bachelor, be began to doubt whether he could buy shoes enough to fit
all the feet of his betrothed. He had not looked on her face or figure
yet. Indeed it was hardly Korean etiquette that he should—openly at
least. So far, he had not seen her tiny feet to count them up, but he
suspected that, since she belonged to the Pil family, she must have a
thousand feet according to her reputation. When he came to calculate
what it would cost him, even in cheap twine sandals, he was startled.
When he figured out what ladies’ turned up kids would come to he was so
alarmed that he nearly fainted. At the sight of five hundred pairs of
shoes, however tiny, his breath almost failed him and he saw himself
ruined. What should he do?
And when she took off her foot-gear at night, where should he stow it
away? Then, what a noise she would make, if she put on rough-soled
shoes, while at her work around the house and yard. It was horrible for
a quiet bachelor even to think of the clatter she would make. Already
he felt deafness coming on. Should he break off the engagement? Yet how
could any one of the Wum family honorably do such a thing? What would
the neighbors say? Could he, if prone to breaking his word, get another
bride of a family so respectable as that of the Pil?
However he would sleep over it, as there were some days before the
wedding. But next morning the matter cleared up, and he was able to
crawl into his hole and out of sight with comfort. He sent a letter to
Miss Pil, setting forth the facts, and asking for a release from the
engagement to marry. The substance of what he wrote was this; that
owing to his small fortune he would be unable to buy her all the shoes,
and of the kind which a lady of her quality and tastes required. He
therefore could not think of asking her to share his poverty, but
begged her to secure another husband who could do so.
Now it happened that the letters crossed on the road. Each had a
refusal before the ink was dry; so neither could complain.
So there was no wedding, nor any frolic among the young folks, or
feasting of relatives, and to this day Miss Pil remains single and Mr.
Wum has no wife. They were very severe on the girl. All the gossips say
that it served the thousand-footed hussy right. Folks had better look
on the good points in a person’s character and not dwell upon his
faults and defects. On the other hand, in Mr. Wum’s village, all
declare with one voice that bachelors should count up all the expense
in getting married. Miss Pil still goes shoeless hiding from light
under a stone, and Mr. Wum keeps out of sight underground, for he has
nothing to wear.