amusements he had few resources left. Persons of his description are not
given to literary or intellectual pursuits, and in all probability
both reading and writing were accomplishments entirely unknown to the
ordinary class of giants. Eating, drinking, and sleeping appeared to
be the chief objects for which these creatures existed, except to make
themselves generally disagreeable to their neighbours, which was an
object in which it is quite true that they rarely failed to achieve
complete success. So when the excellent Bramble-buffer had found out
that the task of emptying the Rhine was beyond his powers, and cared
not to fall back upon the old pastimes, of which he had had his fill,
he took to the practice of taking long walks, and journeying into other
countries wherein he might find fresh people to terrify, new fields to
destroy, and a wider scope for the exercise of his vast strength and
malevolent disposition.
“He marched over a great extent of ground, and did a vast deal of
mischief during these excursions. Such was his size and weight, that the
commonest action on his part {146}was sometimes fraught with the most
unexpected results and the direst consequences to mankind. For instance,
if he carelessly slung his walking-stick as he moved along the road,
the implement, being of the size and thickness of a well-grown fir-tree,
brushed off the heads of trees--and of people too, for that matter,
if it came in contact with them,---just as a stick in the hand of an
ordinary mortal knocks over poppies and thistles if employed for that
purpose. Then if he sat down on a small hill to rest, it was as if a man
had jumped with his full weight on a mole-hill of which the earth was
newly thrown up and consequently soft. The ground trembled beneath
his weight as if with the shock of a sudden earthquake; and very often
squashed under him so as to jut out on either side, and cause sudden and
most inconvenient alterations in the fields and woods on each side of
the hill, more especially so in those cases in which dwellings happened
to have been erected thereupon. And woe betide the owner of ponds or
wells when the Daddyroarer happened to be thirsty as he passed by them.
It was no unusual thing for him to empty a pond at a draught, and I have
known a whole village affected with drought for weeks together because
old Bramble-buffer had taken a fancy to drink of the wells by which it
was supplied with water.
“In his journey at last the old fellow came to the seashore, and having
never before visited the blue ocean, he was abundantly delighted at all
he saw. Even the coarse and blunted nature of a giant cannot fail to be
struck with admiration at the first sight of the glorious sea. The waves
breaking with regular and solemn force upon the shore, as if protesting
ever against their enforced {147}restraint within prescribed limits: the
foam dancing lightly upon the water far away out at sea; the bright rays
of the sun reflected in varying lights upon the shifting waters; the
ships riding at anchor, or merrily cleaving the waves asunder in their
onward course; the sea-birds skimming along the bosom of the sea, ever
and anon with shrill scream dipping their long wings in the spray of the
wave, and mounting again in high air with joyous flight; the huge fish
showing his scaled form for an instant in the light of day, and the next
moment burying himself fathoms deep in the world of waters below;
all these things, passing before the eye at the same moment with the
rapidity of thought, strike the beholder, be he giant or man, with
mingled awe and wonder.
“In the case of old Bramble-buffer, however, neither feeling lasted
long, and after a very short space of time the spirit of mischief arose
within his breast, and tempted him to try his powers of doing evil
under the new circumstances before him. Placing himself in a recumbent
posture, and supporting his huge frame upon his two stalwart arms, he
began to blow violently down upon the sea below, with all the force of
his mighty lungs. The effect was instantaneous. The bosom of the deep
was troubled as with a terrible hurricane. The waves reared up their
heads, the foam danced higher than ever, the sea-birds shrieked more
loudly, and the fishes were astonished at the wondrous commotion which
had arisen upon the surface of their watery home. The poor mariners,
who were taken totally unawares by the extraordinary suddenness of the
storm, were, as may well be supposed, in considerable trouble. Their
ships were {148}driven from their moorings, masts were snapt asunder,
sails and rigging rent and injured irreparably, and several men and boys
blown overboard by the violence of the terrible blast. Indeed, more
than one vessel was lost, and an immense amount of property utterly
destroyed; and all because of this mad freak of the mischievous old
giant.
[Illustration: 165]
“But the best of the joke in this case was that the poor mortals had
no idea whatever of the cause of the disaster which had so unexpectedly
befallen them, and a lengthy correspondence was carried on in the
newspapers {149}of a certain country whose inhabitants think themselves
wiser than anybody else, as to the cause of storms, the efficacy of
storm signals, and the possibility of foretelling when the weather is
going to be calm or rough. Some people wrote letters which appeared to
the world exceedingly wise, whilst others published ideas which every
one agreed to be remarkably foolish, but none of them ever hit upon
the right cause of this catastrophe, and possibly many others of a like
character, nor did any person ever dream for a moment that the whole of
the affair was owing to the whim of old Bramble-buffer and his desire to
try his strength upon the waves of the ocean. When he had accomplished
his purpose, put everybody and everything into the greatest confusion,
and done all the mischief he could in the shortest possible time, the
fellow sat up, folded his arms, and indulged in a series of hearty
laughs and strange roars of pleasure which the innocent people of the
neighbourhood took for claps of thunder, and said it was a good thing;
that the thunder-storm would clear the air, and the wind would soon be
lulled.
“Giants, however, like men, find pleasures greater in anticipation than
in realisation, and our old friend thought it too much trouble to repeat
the experiment of raising the wind, which is one never to be performed
without a certain amount of difficulty. Accordingly, he resolved to seek
for some other amusement, and turning away from the sea-shore, again
penetrated into the interior of the country. It would be endless to
tell: you all the strange pranks he played, and how gradually his name
became known and detested throughout the whole country through which
the river which bears my name holds {150}its course. It he desired
notoriety, he certainly had it to his heart’s content, and never was
there a being more feared and hated since the beginning of the world.
“At last, having travelled far enough, he returned by easy stages to the
country from whence he had set out, and there recommenced his old
evil practices with the smallest possible delay. He had always a spite
against my beautiful river, I suppose because he had failed in emptying
it; but, whatever the reason may have been, he liked it not, and used to
vary his occupations sometimes by pitching pieces of mountain into
it, and close by its side, so as to make its shores if possible
unapproachable by mortal foot, in doing which he added greatly to the
wild beauty of the scenery, without in reality doing the smallest harm
either to the river or to mankind.
“After a while, old Bramble-buffer began to find that the effects of his
bad and cruel conduct towards mankind had so diminished the number
of those who used to dwell in houses, that he had some difficulty in
obtaining supplies from farms and homesteads as before. He therefore,
much against his will, was obliged to take to hunting and trapping wild
animals, in which he was not very skilful, but for this he was in
some measure compensated by the advantages of size and strength, which
enabled him to catch creatures which his skill alone would never have
brought within reach of his devouring jaws.
“In his search after game he was in the habit of roaming far and wide
over the mountains and through the forests of Rhine-land, and his loud
cries and roars were often heard for miles, sending the frightened
people into their holes and caves, where with trembling hearts they
sought {151}a refuge from the mighty Daddyroarer. At last, one day, the
old fellow had been more than commonly successful in his hunting. Chance
had thrown in his way several roe-buck and sundry hares, of which he had
made a very hearty meal, and naturally felt rather sleepy afterwards.
He therefore wandered slowly through the forest, looking for some
convenient and comfortable spot upon which he might deposit his huge
carcase, and indulge in that after-dinner nap which is ordinarily so
agreeable to persons of a certain age. In a giant’s case, such naps are
almost always unnaturally long and deep, and in fact these vast beings
have been known not unfrequently to sleep round from one dinnertime to
another, when their repast has happened to be somewhat larger and more
satisfactory to themselves than common.
“Old Bramble-buffer looked about, and not seeing any eligible
resting-place at hand, determined to make one for himself by pulling
up a tree or two, and so finding a pillow in their roots and the earth
which would be upturned therewith. So taking hold of a large tree near
him, he gave it a twist and a turn, such as a gardener might do in
pulling up a radish, or a labourer in performing the same office upon a
turnip, and produced precisely the same effect. The tree was uprooted,
and remained in the hands of its destroyer. But it so happened that this
was not an ordinary tree, or rather that there were some extraordinary
circumstances connected with it. It was of very great size, and growing
on the side of a hill; in which a large cave had been excavated beneath
and among the roots of the trees, which served as props and supports for
the sides and roof of the same.
“This {152}cave was inhabited by a number of unhappy mortals, who had
been driven hither by the careless cruelty of the great giant, and who
little thought that the tyranny of their oppressor would follow them
even into this dark and hidden retreat. They, of course, were thrown
into the most terrible consternation by his present feat. The uprooting
of the tree was to them the destruction of their home once more, the
ruin of all they loved, the literal annihilation of their property,
and the loss of all that could still make life dear to them. Fancy the
miserable, the extraordinary results which would happen if one’s house
were suddenly lifted up, and the walls, ceilings, beams, and rafters
fell in around us on every side. Well, this was precisely what happened
to these unfortunate creatures. Nor had they the smallest time for
preparation. It all came upon them in a moment.
“As we have seen, it was only the desire of the giant to provide himself
with a pillow which caused him to pull up the tree, and although he
would probably have done so just the same, or perhaps all the more, if
he had known what the result would be, there is no reason to suppose
that of such result he had the least idea, or indeed that he ever
troubled his head about the possible or probable result of his action to
anybody but himself. As soon, however, as he had pulled up the tree, and
perceived the effects which he had thus produced, the old rascal burst
into a roar of laughter. Indeed the sight was probably as amusing to him
as it must have been horrible to one of the sufferers. The poor little
mortals were running to and fro, each with the most woebegone expression
of countenance, unable to make out {153}what had happened to them. Some,
indeed, were entangled in the roots of the tree, and whirled up aloft
with it in the giant’s hands, some were half smothered by the fallen
earth, and the rest were endeavouring to make their escape best manner
that they could to repair the injury he had done, or leaving the poor
creatures whom he had so cruelly disturbed to repair it for themselves
if they could.
[Illustration: 170]
On the contrary, he made matters worse, and just for the fun of the
thing, stamped several of the mortals into the earth as they were wildly
flying from the ruins of their home, and thus put an {154}end to their
lives and troubles together. Probably, out of mere mischief, he would
have destroyed more of them, if he had happened to have fallen in with
the pastime before dinner. Having dined, however, he was much less
inclined to any active exertion, and therefore contented himself with
putting his foot upon those who were more immediately within his reach,
and then, feeling somewhat fatigued, sat down on that very spot and
prepared for his usual nap. First, however, he indulged in another laugh
at the curious incident which had just occurred; then he peered down
into the cave below, and wondered how any living creatures could exist
in such a dark, dismal place, and what the nature and habits of such
creatures could be. This being a subject too vast and deep for the
intellect of a giant, he could not entertain it without giving a
tremendous yawn, which still more inclined him to sleep. So, arranging
his position as comfortably as he could upon his back, which is a
giant’s natural posture when about to turn in for the night, he composed
himself to slumber, without a thought of remorse for the unhappy beings
whom he had just treated in so ruthless a manner, and in a very short
time was buried in the land of dreams.
“Now, amongst those who had been driven from the shelter of the cave,
and rendered houseless and homeless in a moment by the act of the giant,
was a worthy person of the name of Hans. His other name is unknown to
me, or at least I have forgotten it at the present moment, which comes
to much the same thing. Hans had followed the honourable profession of
a tailor in happier days, before the tyranny of the giant had destroyed
trade, crippled commerce, and made men careless {155}as to whether they
wore coats or trousers at all when their whole lives were so full of
misery and uncertainty. When tailoring, like other handicrafts, thus
fell into disuse, and men who were homeless and houseless frequently
became clothes-less also, Hans faced the matter boldly, and lived by his
wits like the others, making himself exceedingly useful in the cave-life
which he and his companions found themselves obliged to adopt. No one
knew better how to arrange the interior of the caves after the best
and most convenient fashion; no one was more urbane to the men, or
more courteous and obliging to the women; no one, in short, had
proved himself a more useful and agreeable companion in that banished
community.
“Having been engaged in some domestic occupation within the cave at
the time of the misfortune which befell its inmates, Hans bore his full
share in the general calamity, and indeed only owed his escape with life
to his activity and presence of mind. Whirled upwards with the tree, he
clung tightly to the nearest root, and had the wisdom to drop himself
just at the right moment upon the ground, and run lightly away into the
brushwood. As soon, however, as the assault was over, and the destroyer
of his brethren had lain down to sleep, the bold Hans again came forth.
“Many men would have fled as far as possible from that scene of sorrow
and destruction, and thought only of the preservation of their own lives
from the fate which had befallen so many of their kind. But Hans had too
much public spirit to take any such selfish course. He descended without
delay into the cave, and ascertained as well as he could the full extent
of the damage which had {156}been sustained. Then he ran to and fro
among his fellows, exhorting them to bear with courage this terrible
reverse, and begging them to meet at once in a cave hard by, and consult
as to the best measures which could be taken under the circumstances in
which they found themselves.
“In a very short time, owing to his exertions, more than a hundred of
the unhappy mortals assembled together and began to take counsel for
the future. As is usual in all such cases, there was a great variety of
opinion. One man advised that they should all forthwith hang themselves,
as life had become so insecure as to be almost worthless. It was urged,
however, that this would afford no remedy for the existing state of
things, and would be like throwing away your gold because you had been
robbed of your silver. Besides, it would be an undignified thing to come
to a general termination of so inglorious a character, and the proposal
was speedily scouted as one totally unworthy of consideration.
“Then it was suggested by another person that a subscription should
immediately be raised for the sufferers, and advertisements to that
effect be inserted in all the daily papers. As the speaker was the
proprietor and editor of one of these, it is possible that he had an eye
to business in making the suggestion, which, however, fell flat upon the
ears of the audience. No one there had any money to spare, and everybody
was more or less a sufferer from a calamity which had fallen so
generally upon the race of man. Some advised that they should all
emigrate, but then they didn’t know where to go to, and, in short, it
seemed as if they were likely {157}to come to no agreement; everybody
objected to everything that anybody else said, no one seemed to have any
weight or authority in the assembly, and it really appeared a hopeless
case altogether.
“At last Hans, who had kept a respectful silence for some time, as
became one in his position, whilst others talked nonsense (which is
occasionally done at public meetings, as well as elsewhere, down to
the present day), came forward, and asked leave to offer his advice.
‘Gentlemen,’ he said, ‘I hope you will agree with me that it is
necessary to do something in this case. To sit still with our hands
folded, and do nothing, would be certainly the very worst course we
could possibly pursue. The horrible cruelty of the vile Daddyroarer
has first driven us from our former happy homes, destroyed our hopes of
prosperity, and condemned us to an almost savage life; then, not content
with the amount of misery which he had already inflicted on us, the
tyrant has followed us even into the forest, uprooted and ruined the new
home which we had formed for ourselves, and once more turned adrift upon
the wide world those of us who have been lucky enough to escape with
life. How long then are we to endure such a state of things as this?
While this huge monster walks the earth unchecked and unrestrained, no
man’s life will be safe; and even if we run away and find for ourselves
fresh hiding-places, what security have we that at any moment he may not
appear amongst us and again inflict upon us ruin and destruction? Depend
upon it, gentlemen, this question must be looked in the face. It cannot
be evaded any longer. Running away is useless. The enemy must be
no longer avoided. At this moment he sleeps in security over our
{158}ruined homes. He must be attacked! Never was there a more
auspicious moment! Let us take courage, and assail the giant where he
lies!’
“As Hans spoke a thrill of horror ran through the meeting, who could by
no means bring themselves to realise the idea of attacking a monster
so many sizes larger than themselves, and gifted with strength so
infinitely greater” than the united efforts of many ‘of them put
together. So a murmur of voices, all in the negative, greeted the little
tailor when he resumed his seat; and presently one of those present,
who, being the oldest, was reputed the wisest (which, however, is by
no means a safe rule to go by), stood up and spoke in his turn. He said
that it was folly to talk after the fashion of the speech to which they
had just listened; and, as this remark was somewhat personal, it was at
once much applauded, which encouraged the orator to proceed. He remarked
that since the first man came into the world down to that day no man had
ever-dreamed of attacking a giant, and, therefore, that it could not now
be done. This sentiment also commended itself to many of his
hearers, who cherished the belief that no new scheme ought ever to be
entertained, as the world had gone on so far very well without it,
and that what had never been done before had better not be attempted.
Finding his audience possessed with such a good conservative spirit, the
old man said further, that as giants had from time immemorial tyrannized
over man, it was doubtless intended that they should do so, and it might
savour of impiety to endeavour to alter a state of things which had
lasted so long. Moreover, the power and authority of giants over men was
so well established {159}that it would be almost impossible to reverse
the order of things. Comparing such an attempt with efforts made in
other countries, it seemed to him to be almost as absurd as an attempt
to reform a House of Lords, or reverse the decision of a Governing Body.
Then, hazarding a joke (which was very well received), he said, that
if his friend the little tailor wanted ‘his goose cooked,’ no doubt he
could get that operation performed by attacking authority, and if he
chose to run his head against a wall, no one could prevent him. But
he (the speaker) would appeal to those before him, as sensible and
practical men, and ask them to reject as idle and absurd the wild
theories placed before them by little Hans. Giants would be giants, and
men would be men to the end of the world, and they must put up with the
misfortune which had befallen them as well as they could, and not make
it worse by entering upon such a hopeless enterprise as that which had
been proposed.
“This speech met with so much approval from the mortals there assembled,
who were thoroughly cowed and subdued in spirit by the long course of
suffering which they had undergone, that Hans at first felt his heart
sink within him. He knew well enough that he could do nothing alone, and
it seemed as if all were against him. But, remembering the old adage,
that ‘Fortune favours the brave,’ and being a man of undaunted pluck
and resolution, he determined not to be put down either by taunts or
claptrap. He therefore rose again, and ignoring, like a wise man, the
foolish and vulgar joke directed against his own most respectable trade,
proceeded to state his views to the best of his ability. He acknowledged
that reverence ought to be paid {160}to age, and that the last speaker
was consequently-entitled to every attention. At the same time he could
not but observe, that if his doctrine were to hold good, that things
should be left to go on as they are merely _because_ they are, and that
nothing new ought ever to be attempted for fear of failure, the world
would be in a very lamentable condition, and no improvement would
ever take place in anything. He modestly remarked that, according to
tradition, mankind at one period of their history wore only the skins of
animals, and at a previous time no clothes at all, and that, if the old
gentleman’s views were correct, they never ought to have quitted the
latter condition. ‘Moreover,’ said he, to cut a long story short,
‘it has been suggested to me that _I_ may attack the giant alone if
I please, and no one will interfere. Be it so: I only ask for six
others--half-a-dozen volunteers--and sooner than submit any longer to
the present misery and degradation in which I and my fellow-men are
placed, I will make the attempt; I can but perish, and, in such a cause,
death will be glorious.’