ENTERS TROUBLE
"You'll know her because she has yellow hair and gray, gray eyes and her
clothes fit," said Mrs. Horne. "Besides, nobody else will get off."
"How'll we know they fit her?" Lafe asked. "Suppose they shouldn't
happen to fit her right snug, ma'am, we'll leave her at The Tanks?"
"She'll be on the last car," said Mrs. Horn "Remember--yellow hair and
gray eyes. Judith walks like this."
With these directions, Mrs. Horn sent Johnson to The Tanks to meet the
Burro express. It was called that by the sparse population of the region
in a spirit of levity: a burro will pause to graze on the least excuse
and takes joy in lying down with his pack.
It was twenty-seven miles from the ranch to The Tanks, and Manuel would
follow with a buckboard and mule team, since it was manifestly absurd to
expect Mrs. Vining to make the journey horseback. Lafe was much elated
to be chosen for this mission and invited me to accompany him.
"Miz Horne," said he, "wouldn't send a greenhorn. No, sir; she wants
somebody who'll look like something in decent company. Say, if I get any
stronger with ol' Horne, he'd ought to raise me. Don't you reckon?"
Cheered by the prospect, he began a monologue to his horse, a habit Mr.
Johnson had acquired in lonely places. "Doggone your fat head, why can't
you lift your feet? Hey? Hold still, can't you, till I light this
cigarette? Oh, you needn't look back. You know I'm here all right."
In early afternoon we crossed a canon on the far side of The Hatter and
turned to the left along a mesa. Lafe puckered his eyes, squinted
carefully and said: "Well, I swan. Do you see that?"
A man was sitting on the skull of a horse and he was counting the tops
of the hills. It struck me as a profitless form of endeavor. As we
neared him: "No," he remarked, "that's not right. I made it two thousand
and three before."
"Off in your tally, pardner?" Lafe inquired civilly.
He proceeded, unheeding, with his simple addition. "One thousand and
seventy-six, and those five little fellows make--what do they make,
now?" He broke off to scratch his head in vexation. He looked at Johnson
briefly and then stared at me.
"That fellow there," he said, with a nod at Lafe, "that fellow's crazy.
Everybody's crazy out here--all but me."
He was not an old man, but his hair was grizzled and fell in dirty
disorder to his shoulders. We could see portions of him through his
clothes, and a sleeve of his shirt was not. Yet I began to marvel, for
he spoke with the accent of culture.
"There used to be three thousand four hundred and eight scrub-cedars on
that big mountain yonder," he confided to me. "I've lost count a bit
lately, though. What do you make 'em?"
"You're short six. Four hundred and fourteen--not four hundred and
eight."
He thanked me and considered this for some minutes. "Perhaps you're
right," he said. "Sometimes when these old rocks take to hopping up and
down, it keeps a man on the move not to lose track of 'em."
"It must be right hard doing that 'rithmetic all day long?" Johnson
ventured.
"Oh, yes. I get hungry frequently. Have you boys got anything to eat?
Well, if you haven't, you'd best be on your way."
Complying with the suggestion, Lafe turned his horse. "It's that ol'
prospector who lives up on the shoulder of The Hatter," he told me.
It did not seem right to leave him thus. The man was deranged and unfit
to be at large. But when I proposed that he accompany us to The Tanks,
our acquaintance returned a vehement refusal. We could not fool him, he
said. The last man who gave him a ride had tried to put him on board a
train, and he had been compelled to knock the fellow on the head with a
stick of wood. So we left him sitting on the skull, counting the tops of
the hills. He mentioned carelessly that he would probably see us again.
There was no mistaking the lady we had come to escort.
"There she is. Wouldn't she knock you cold?" Lafe whispered.
Her hair was yellow, and she gave the impression of having been melted
and poured into her pink muslin. Assuredly she was not of our world, and
most certainly her clothes fitted. The conductor, a large individual of
red hair and an aloof expression, closed his left eye slowly at Lafe and
stepped aboard. The Burro express crawled away up the valley and we set
out for the ranch, Johnson riding close to the buckboard, the better to
converse with Mrs. Vining.
She began to question about the country and cow work. Everything was
"astonishing" or "delightful, really," of course; and no matter what she
said, there was injected into her speech an indefinable note that seemed
to place the listener on a confidential footing, to the exclusion of all
others. Some women have this faculty. The two ignored me utterly. I
coughed once or twice as a faint reminder to Lafe that he was a newly
married man and that I was prepared to do the civil thing myself, but he
took no notice.
We had forgotten all about our friend of the mathematical propensities,
when he appeared suddenly beside the trail.
"Hello," he cried, "back already?"
Mrs. Vining regarded the unkempt figure with composure.
"Why don't we drive on?" she said. "Drive on, please."
"Who's that? Who's that, I say?" The prospector advanced on the
buckboard at a shambling trot.
"Please, please drive on," Mrs. Vining entreated faintly.
Instead of obeying, the Mexican waited. The prospector came to the wheel
of the buckboard and peered hard at Mrs. Vining. She met his gaze in a
sort of horrified fascination for a moment and then turned completely
about in her seat, so that her shoulders were to him. Before we could
intervene, he seized her by the arm and commenced to drag her out. He
was mumbling as he did so.
"No, I won't go," she screamed. "It wasn't my fault. I won't go. Help!
Help me!"
Lafe spurred almost on top of the fellow and cut at him with a quirt. He
released his hold and dodged, and Mrs. Vining sank back into the
buckboard.
"Hi, you--drive on," Johnson commanded.
He made no attempt to chastise the prospector. A demented man is not
responsible and is protected of God. Such is the creed of primitive
peoples and to it Lafe held strongly. Manuel whipped the mules and we
went by the mountain prowler amid a shower of sand and pebbles. He
remained in the trail, staring after us. He shouted something and
whirled his arms at a great rate, but when Lafe cantered back, he
scurried off among the mesquite like a scared rabbit.
"What an extraordinary person," said Mrs. Vining, when Johnson overtook
us. Her lips were open in a fixed smile and her skin faded yellow under
its powder.
"He's harmless, ma'am," Lafe assured her. "Don't you be scared. He's
just a bit locoed. We'll go fetch him to-morrow or next day, if you say
so."
"No, no," she begged. "Leave the poor creature alone."
I could see her hands tremble in her lap. She seemed distrait all the
way home and as soon as Mrs. Horne had done embracing her, she retired.
Next morning, however, she was sitting on the porch and called Lafe to
her side. They talked there for an hour or two and we could hear
Johnson's soft bass laugh. When he joined me in the corrals to catch the
horses, he was looking very pleased with himself.
Mrs. Vining spent the next three days in minute probing of range life.
At least, that is what Lafe told me she found to talk to him about.
Apparently Mrs. Horne had little sympathy for this seeking after
knowledge, for she laughed a trifle impatiently and remarked to me that
men were idiots the world over and it was none of her business.
She made it her business on the third day.
"Why don't you leave Lafe alone?" she demanded.
"Why, my dear Martha, I'm not running after Mr. Johnson."
"Well, then, what do you find to talk about all the time? It's shameful,
Judy."
"There you go again. One can't be civil to any sort of a man, but that
Puritanical conscience of yours--"
"Oh, darn," said Mrs. Horne.
We were treated on succeeding days to the spectacle of Lafe hovering
about Mrs. Vining like a fly above molasses paper--he knows he ought not
to be there at all, but cannot keep away. I am persuaded that a third
party could have heard all they said without embarrassment; but still,
there was Hetty. And it interfered with his work, just when he was new
to it and should have applied himself whole-heartedly. The entire
superintendence of the Anvil range fell to him, but Lafe now gave up
long trips. When he did go out, Mrs. Vining went with him on the pretext
of familiarizing herself with the country. Lafe began to assume a hint
of bravado in his bearing and was evidently flattered that he could
attract a woman of Mrs. Vining's world.
"Judith," said Mrs. Horne, "if you don't let up on Lafe Johnson, I'll
tell his wife, or get Bob to give him his time."
"His time? What's that?" she asked in amaze. She had just got out of bed
and was brushing her yellow hair. They could hear Johnson whistling
"Turkey in the Straw" as he went past the house.
"Fire him." Her friend faced Mrs. Vining squarely. She was intensely
angry. "What do you mean by taking him out on the porch as you did last
night?"
"Martha, how dare you say such a thing? You're horribly rude and--and
unkind. Why, I never thought--"
"Of course you didn't," Mrs. Horne went on in a level voice. "You never
do. And you're going to tell me all that nonsense? Remember, I'm a
woman, Judy, and the woman was never born who wouldn't lie about some
things."
"We're nothing but the most casual friends," said Mrs. Vining warmly.
Mrs. Horne stopped her with a gesture of passionate impatience. "Who
said you were anything else? Will nothing sober you? I would have
thought that Harry--"
"You're cruel, Martha. Yes, you are. Will you leave me alone to dress?"
"Oh, darn!" Mrs. Horne exclaimed.
From that interview she came straight to me. A party of friends was
coming from the mining town for a few days, she said, and I was to meet
them at The Tanks. Among them would be Mr. Mortimer Peck, a bachelor who
managed a large copper mine. Also, on my way over, I could go around by
Hope Canon and leave a letter for Mrs. Johnson. Perhaps I grinned. At
any rate, Mrs. Horne said: "Now, don't try to be clever, but keep your
thoughts to yourself."
To my everlasting credit, be it said, I did not read that letter,
although it was unsealed. Whatever was in it, Hetty seemed dumbfounded.
For a moment I feared she would faint. She was not that sort, however.
Before I left she was bristling with energy and told me that she would
be at the ranch on my return. There was a red spot in each cheek and the
light of battle in her eyes.