Let us, my friends, pass over this unfortunate incident, and get on to
the next thing as quickly as possible. The next thing on our program
is Truth. The one who best understands Truth is undoubtedly the
Philosopher.--Here he is, and we shall commence without delay. Will
some one volunteer to conduct the examination? Thank you, madam. Go
right ahead.
THE LADY. We wish to ask you a few questions.
THE PHILOSOPHER. Certainly, madam. What about?
THE LADY. About Truth.
THE PHILOSOPHER. Dear, dear!
THE LADY. Whom are you addressing?
THE PHILOSOPHER. I beg your pardon!--It was only an exclamation of
surprise. It has been so long since anybody has talked to me about
Truth. How quaint and refreshing!
THE LADY. Please do not be frivolous.
THE PHILOSOPHER. I am sorry--but really, it _is_ amusing. Tell me, to
which school do you belong?
THE LADY. To the Julia Richmond High School, if you must know--though I
don’t see what that has to do with Truth.
THE PHILOSOPHER. Oh! You mean you are a school-teacher!
THE LADY. Certainly. Doesn’t that suit you?
THE PHILOSOPHER. It delights me. I feared at first you might be a
Hegelian, or even a Platonist. Now that I find you are a Pragmatist
like myself--
THE LADY. Pragmatist? Yes, I have heard of Pragmatism. William
James--summer course in Philosophy. But why do you think I am a
Pragmatist?
THE PHILOSOPHER. A school-teacher _must_ be a pragmatist, madam, or go
mad. If you really believed the human brain to be an instrument capable
of accurate thinking, your experiences with your pupils and your
principal, not to speak of your boards of education, would furnish you
a spectacle of human wickedness and folly too horrible to be endured.
But you realize that the poor things were never intended to think.
THE LADY. That’s true; they’re doing the best they can, aren’t they?
They just _can’t_ believe anything they don’t want to believe!
THE PHILOSOPHER. That is to say, man is not primarily a thinking
animal--he is a creature of emotion and action.
THE LADY. Especially action. They are always in such a hurry to get
something done that they really can’t stop to think about it! But I’m
afraid all this is really beside the point. What we want to know is why
the school fails so miserably in its attempt to teach children to think?
THE PHILOSOPHER. Perhaps it is in too much of a hurry. But are you sure
you really want children to learn to think?
THE LADY. Of course we do!
THE PHILOSOPHER. The greatest part of life, you know, can be lived
without thought. We do not think about where we put our feet as we
walk along an accustomed road. We leave that to habit. We do not think
about how to eat, once we have learned to do it in a mannerly way. The
accountant does not think about how to add a column of figures--he
has his mind trained to the task. And there is little that cannot be
done by the formation of proper habits, to the complete elimination
of thought. The habits will even take care of the regulation of the
emotions. For all practical purposes, don’t you agree with me that
thinking might be dispensed with?