6. On reaching home, a heavy dinner, a superstratum of wine, an
astronomical peep at the new moon, and--a cigar.
For a short time, a stout system is exhilarated, and a strong stomach
may be invigorated, by a series of gifts so munificently bestowed upon
them by the right hand of their lord and master.
But as Death eventually levels all distinctions, so do a constant
slight intoxication produced by tobacco, vinous and spirituous liquors,
with a superabundance of rich food, sooner or later first weaken the
stomach, and then gradually debilitate the system, of the strong man as
well as of the puny one.
The first symptom of premature decay is announced by the nerves, which,
to the astonishment of the young rider, sometimes fail so rapidly,
that while the whole of the rest of his system appears to him and to
everybody to be as blooming and as vigorous as ever, he is compelled,
under the best excuse he can invent, to sell his stud, and abandon for
the rest of his life the favourite recreation he has himself destroyed.
Again, although the delicate network of the nervous system may
continue uninjured, the stomach, from being continually over-excited,
overwhelmed, and over-burdened by a heavy, conglomerated mixture
which it has not power to digest, begins to become unable to execute,
not its natural functions, but the unnatural amount of work it is
called upon to perform. The blood becomes impure, secretions are
vitiated, the liver gets disordered, the oppressed lungs are ready
for inflammation, the brain is heated, the pulse irregular; in fact,
the whole mechanism of the system becomes so deranged that the rider
eventually experiences, to his vast regret, that he enjoys rest more
than exercise, and accordingly in due, or rather in undue time, he
retires from his saddle to an elbow chair.
But he is hardly seated therein when the sudden change in his habits,
from an active to a sedentary life, rapidly produces the usual effects.
Did his big toe, unknown to him, receive yesterday any little blow?
Can he have sprained it in his sleep? What can possibly have swelled
it so? How shiny and scarlet it looks! How burning hot it is getting!
Gracious heavens, what a twitch that was!! something must be _in_ it.
That something, oh! seems to be a red-hot file in the hands of a demon
who is rasping a hole in the bone. Ah! Ai! O O O OH!!
But this little mischievous demon is only one of a legion; for besides
the eating complaint, commonly called gout, diseases, all more or less
painful, produced by intemperate habits, or, in other words, by giving
to the poor willing stomach more food and liquor than it could digest,
are so innumerable, that it would require, and does require, a library
of books to describe them, with regiments of medicine-men to prescribe
for them--in vain.
"India, my boy," said an Irishman to a friend on his arrival at
Calcutta, "is jist the finest climate under the sun. But a lot of young
fellows come out here, and they dhrink and they ate, and they ate and
they dhrink, and they die. And thin, they write home to their friends a
pack o' lies, and say, it's _the climate_ as has killed 'em!"
But to return to the saddle. Instead of preaching from it abstinence
to hunting-men, they ought, on the contrary, to be urged to enjoy the
greatest amount of gratification that can possibly be derived from
eating and drinking, not for a single day, week, month, or year, but
throughout their whole lives.
To enable themselves, however, to ascertain this amount, it is
necessary for them to put into a pair of scales, to be accurately
weighed against each other, the enjoyments of temperance, and the
sorrows and anguish of intemperance. If, on doing so, they ascertain
that the balance is in favour of eating, drinking, and tobacco-smoking
_ad libitum_, they will act wisely in indulging in all three to the
utmost possible extent. If, on the contrary, they ascertain that some
of these pleasures last only for a few seconds, some for a few minutes,
and none for more than one or two hours, while, on the other hand, the
afflictions caused by intemperance endure for months and years;--that
"felo-de-se" they put an end to hunting, spoil cricket, stop shooting,
and last, but not least, ruin not only bodily but intellectual
enjoyments, they will act wisely by resolving to befriend themselves as
they befriend their horses, namely, by prescribing for all and each an
ample quantity of food of the very best description, and, if more be
required by a greedy stomach--_the muzzle_.
+Difference between Leicestershire and Surrey Hunting.+
When a stranger comes to hunt in "the shires" he is surprised, and is
usually a little alarmed, at the size of the fences, until he learns,
by experience, how very easily they are crossed; for although almost
all non-hunting people, especially ladies, fancy that it must be
dangerous to encounter a large fence, and easy to pass over a small
one, yet in practice the reverse, within moderate bounds, may be said
to be the truth: indeed, it is notorious that of the bad accidents
that happen in the hunting-field, at least three-fourths occur either
at small impediments or at no impediment at all. For instance,
perhaps the very worst fall a rider can get is by his horse, at full
speed, stepping on the edge of a little rabbit-hole; next comes that
occasioned by one of his fore feet in his gallop dropping into a deep
drain about six inches broad; next to that by his coming to a ditch
too narrow to attract his observation, or to a stiff hedge so low that
he disdains to rise at it; and at this rate danger diminishes, until
the rider arrives at what may be termed the point of greatest safety,
namely, a moderately high fence through which (as in the county first
mentioned) a horse can at a glimpse see on the other side a broad and
deep ditch or small brook.
A hunter coming fast and cheerfully at a fence of this description, no
sooner is observed to prick his ears, than in self-defence he is _sure_
to try, and if he tries he is not only sure, but by his momentum he
_cannot help_ to clear it.
The great ease with which large fences can be crossed produces
the following rather curious result, namely, that although the
horses ridden after hounds in Leicestershire, Northamptonshire, and
Lincolnshire are infinitely superior to those ridden in Surrey, yet the
small, blind, cramped, awkward, and consequently _difficult_, fences
of the latter county require, and therefore create, better horsemen
than those who, in "the shires," as joyously as swallows in summer, are
to be seen in leafless November skimming together across grass fields
separated by broad fences.
And it is for this reason, that while a horseman from the small,
difficult fences, if well mounted, has always been found able to go and
clear the broad, easier ones, the very best riders from the region
of the latter, whenever for the first time they try to get across the
former, must, until they have been sufficiently educated, either submit
to follow experienced leaders or--break their necks.
But although of valour discretion has been declared to be the better
part, yet in hunting a constant necessity to "look before you leap" is
a virtue so exceedingly painful to practise, that on the principle that
"where ignorance is bliss 'tis folly to be wise," the imperfect rider,
in a good country, may rest well satisfied that he has infinitely more
enjoyment than is allotted to the superior horseman in a bad one.
+The Stable.+
A comparison between the true Briton's love for his home, and that
of a horse for his stable, elicits conflicting facts which are very
remarkable; for although in theory and in law the house of the former
is said to be "his castle," and although the latter is confined to his
stable by head-collars, pillar-reins, rack-chains, halter-ropes, yet
the hard, honest fact is, that the owner of the castle often seizes
every possible opportunity to escape from it, while the inhabitant of
the stable, if left to his own accord, would never leave it.