But yester-night I prayed aloud
In anguish and in agony. Coleridge.
The night was far advanced, and yet Ralph had not returned to
Shoulthwaite. It was three hours since Matthew Branthwaite had left
the Moss. Mrs. Ray still sat before the turf fire and gazed into it in
silence. Rotha was by her side, and Willy lay on the settle drawn up
to the hearth. All listened for the sound of footsteps that did not
come.
The old clock ticked out louder and more loud; the cricket's measured
chirp seemed to grow more painfully audible; the wind whistled through
the leafless boughs without, and in the lulls of the abating storm the
low rumble of the ghyll could be heard within. What kept Ralph away?
It was no unusual thing for him to be abroad from dawn to dusk, but
the fingers of the clock were approaching eleven, and still he did not
come. On this night, of all others, he must have wished to be at home.
Earlier in the evening Rotha had found occasion to go on some errand
to the neighboring farm, and there she had heard that towards noon
Ralph had been seen on horseback crossing Stye Head towards Wastdale.
Upon reporting this at the Moss, the old dame had seemed to be
relieved.
“He thinks of everything,” she had said. All that day she had
cherished the hope that it would be possible to bury Angus over the
hills, at Gosforth. It was in the old churchyard there that her father
lay-her father, her mother, and all her kindred. It was twenty miles
to those plains and uplands, that lay beyond the bleak shores of
Wastdale. It was a full five hours' journey there and back. But when
twice five hours had been counted, and still Ralph had not returned,
the anxiety of the inmates of the old house could no longer be
concealed. In the eagerness of their expectation the clock ticked
louder than ever, the cricket chirped with more jubilant activity, the
wind whistled shriller, the ghylls rumbled longer, but no welcomer
sound broke the stillness.
At length Willy got up and put on his hat. He would go down the lonnin
to where it joined the road, and meet Ralph on the way. He would have
done so before, but the horror of walking under the shadow of the
trees where last night his father fell had restrained him. Conquering
his fear, he sallied out.
The late moon had risen, and was shining at full. With a beating heart
he passed the dreaded spot, and reached the highway beyond. He could
hear nothing of a horse's canter. There were steps approaching, and he
went on towards whence they came. Two men passed close beside him, but
neither of them was Ralph. They did not respond to his greeting when,
in accordance with the custom of the country, he bade them “Good
night.” They were strangers, and they looked closely--he thought
suspiciously--at him as they went by.
Willy walked a little farther, and then returned. As he got back to
the lane that led to the house, the two men passed him again. Once
more they looked closely into his face. His fear prompted him to
speak, but again they went on in silence. As Willy turned up towards
home, the truth flashed upon him that these men were the cause of
Ralph's absence. He knew enough of what was going on in the world to
realize the bare possibility that his brother's early Parliamentarian
campaign might bring him into difficulties even yet. It seemed certain
that the lord of Wythburn Manor would be executed. Only Ralph's
obscurity could save him.
When Willy got back into the kitchen, the impression that Ralph was
being pursued and dogged was written on his face. His mother
understood no more of his trouble than that his brother had not
returned; she looked from his face back to the fire, that now died
slowly on the hearth. Rotha was quicker to catch the significance of
Willy's nervous expression and fitful words. To her the situation now
appeared hardly less than tragic. With the old father lying dead in
the loft above, what would come to this household if the one strong
hand in it was removed? Then she thought of her own father. What would
become of him? Where was he this night? The sense of impending
disaster gave strength to her, however. She rose and put her hand on
Willy's arm as he walked to and fro across the earthen floor. She was
the more drawn to him from some scarce explicable sense of his
weakness.
“Some one coming now,” he said in eager tones--his ears were awake
with a feverish sensitiveness--“some one at the back.” It was Ralph at
last. He had come down the side of the ghyll, and had entered the
house from behind. All breathed freely.
“God bless thee!” said Mrs. Ray.
“You've been anxious. It was bad to keep you so,” he said, with an
obvious effort to assume his ordinary manner.
“I reckon thou couldst not have helped it, my lad,” said Mrs. Ray.
Relieved and cheerful, she was bustling about to get Ralph's supper on
the table.
“Well, no,” he answered. “You know, I've been over to Gosforth--it's a
long ride--I borrowed Jackson's pony from Armboth; and what a wild
country it is, to be sure! It blew a gale on Stye Head. It's bleak
enough up there on a day like this, mother. I could scarce hold the
horse.”
“I don't wonder, Ralph; but see, here's thy poddish--thou must be fair
clemm'd.”
“No, no; I called at Broom Hill.”
“How did you come in at the back, lad? Do you not come up the lonnin?”
“I thought I'd go round by the low meadow and see all safe, and then
the nearest way home was on the hill side, you know.”
Willy and Rotha glanced simultaneously at Ralph as he said this, but
they found nothing in his face, voice, or manner to indicate that his
words were intended to conceal the truth.
“But look how late it is!” he said as the clock struck twelve; “hadn't
we better go off to bed, all of us?”
“I think I must surely go off,” said Mrs. Ray, and with Rotha she left
the kitchen. Willy soon followed them, leaving Ralph to eat his supper
alone. Laddie, who had entered with his master, was lying by the
smouldering fire, and after the one had finished eating, the other
came in for his liberal share of the plain meal. Then Ralph rose, and,
lifting up his hat and staff, walked quietly to his brother's room.
Willy was already in bed, but his candle was still burning. Sitting on
an old oak chest that stood near the door of the little room, Ralph
said,--
“I shall perhaps be off again before you are awake in the morning, but
all will be done in good time. The funeral will be on the day after
to-morrow. Robbie Anderson will see to everything.”
“Robbie Anderson?” said Willy in an accent of surprise.
“You know it's the custom in the dale for a friend of the family to
attend to these offices.”
“Yes; but Robbie Anderson of all men!”
“You may depend upon him,” said Ralph.
“This is the first time I've heard that he can depend upon himself,
said Willy.
“True--true--but I'm satisfied about Robbie. No, you need fear
nothing. Robbie's a changed man, I think.”
“Changed he must be, Ralph, if you would commit to his care what could
not be too well discharged by the most trustworthy friend of the
family.”
“Yes, but Robbie will do as well as another--better. You know, Willy,
I have an old weakness for a sheep that strays. When I get it back I
fancy, somehow, it's the best of the flock.”
“May your straggler justify your odd fancy this time, brother!”
“Rotha will see to what has to be done at home,” said Ralph, rising
and turning to go.
“Ralph,” said Willy, “do you know I--” He faltered and began again,
obviously changing the subject. “Have you been in there to-night?”
with a motion of the head towards the room wherein lay all that
remained of their father.
“No; have you?”
“No; I dare not go. I would not if I could. I wish to remember him as
he lived, and one, glance at his dead face would blot out the memory
forever.”
Ralph could not understand this. There was no chord in his nature that
responded to such feelings; but he said nothing in reply.
“Ralph,” continued Willy, “do you know I think Rotha--I almost
thin--do you not think that Rotha rather cares for me?”
A perceptible tremor passed over Ralph's face. Then he said, with
something like a smile, “Do you think she does, my lad?”
“I do--I almost do think so.”
Ralph had resumed his seat on the oak chest. The simple, faltering
words just spoken had shaken him to the core. Hidden there--hidden
even from himself--had lain inert for months a mighty passion such as
only a great heart can know. In one moment he had seen it and known it
for what it was. Yes, he had indeed loved this girl; he loved her
still. When he spoke again his voice seemed to have died inwards; he
appeared to be speaking out of his breast.
“And what of yourself, Willy?” he asked.
“I think I care for her, too,--I think so.”
How sure was the other of a more absolute affection than the most
positive words could express! Ralph sat silent for a moment, as was
his wont when under the influence of strong feeling. His head inclined
downwards, and his eyes were fixed on the floor. A great struggle was
going on within him. Should he forthwith make declaration of his own
passion? Love said, Yes! love should be above all ties of kindred, all
claims of blood. But the many tongues of an unselfish nature said, No!
If this thing were wrong, it would of itself come to nought; if right,
it would be useless to oppose it. The struggle was soon over, and the
impulse of self-sacrifice had conquered. But at what a cost--at what a
cost!
“Yet there is her father, you know,” Willy added. “One dreads the
thought of such a match. There may be something in the blood--at
least, one fears--”
“You need have no fear of Rotha that comes of her relation to Simeon
Stagg. Sim is an innocent man.”
“So you say--so you say. Let us hope so. It's a terrible thought-that
of marriage with the flesh and blood of--of a murderer.”
“Rotha is as free from taint of crime as--you are. She is a noble
girl, and worthy of you, worthy of any man, whatever her father may
be,” said Ralph.
“Yes, yes, I know; I thought you'd say so. I'm glad, Ralph--I can't
tell you how glad I am--to hear you say so. And if I'm right--if Rotha
really loves me--I know you'll be as glad as I am.”
Ralph's face trembled slightly at this, but he nodded his head and
smiled.
“Not that I could think of it for a long time,” Willy continued. “This
dreadful occurrence must banish all such thoughts for a very long
time.”
Willy seemed to find happiness in the prospect, remote as it might be.
Ralph's breast heaved as he looked upon his brother's brightening
face. That secret of his own heart must lie forever buried there. Yes,
he had already resolved upon that. He should never darken the future
that lay pictured in those radiant eyes. But this was a moment of
agony nevertheless. Ralph was following the funeral of the mightiest
passion of his soul. He got up and opened the door.
“Good night, and God bless you!” he said huskily.
“One moment, Ralph. Did you see two men, strangers, on the road
to-night? Ah, I remember, you came in at the back.”
“Two friends of Joe Garth's,” said Ralph, closing the door behind him.
When he reached his own room he sat for some minutes on the bed. What
were the feelings that preyed upon him? He hardly knew. His heart was
desolate. His life seemed to be losing its hope, or his hope its
object. And not yet had he reached the worst. Some dread forewarning
of a sterner fate seemed to hang above him.
Rising, Ralph threw off his shoes, and drew on a pair of stouter ones.
Then he laced up a pair of leathern leggings, and, taking down a heavy
cloak from behind the door, he put it across his arm. He had no light
but the light of the moon.
Stepping quietly along the creaky old corridor to the room where his
father lay, Ralph opened the door and entered. A clod of red turf
smouldered on the hearth, and the warm glow from it mingled with the
cold blue of the moonlight. How full of the odor of a dead age the
room now seemed to be! The roof was opened through the rude timbers to
the whitened thatch. Sheepskins were scattered about the black oaken
floor. Ralph walked to the chimney-breast, and stood on one of the
skins as he leaned on the rannel-tree shelf. How still and cheerless
it all was!
The room stretched from the front to the back of the house, and had a
window at each end. The moon that shone through the window at the
front cast its light across the foot of the bed. Ralph had come to bid
his last good-night to him who lay thereon. It was in this room that
he himself had been born. He might never enter it again.
How the strong man was laid low! All his pride of strength had shrunk
to this! “The lofty looks of men shall be humbled, and the haughtiness
of men shall be bowed down.” What indeed was man, whose breath was in
his nostrils!
The light was creeping up the bed. Silent was he who lay there as the
secret which he had never discharged even to his deaf pillow. Had that
secret mutinied in the heart that knew its purple war no more? Ah! how
true it was that conscience was a thousand swords. With no witness
against him except himself, whither could he have fled from the
accusation that burned within him as a fire! Not chains nor cells
could have spoken to this strong man like the awful voice of his
solitary heart. How remorse must have corroded that heart! How he must
have numbered the hours of that remorse! How one sanguinary deed must
have trampled away all joyous memories! But the secret agony was over
at last: it was over now.
The moonlight had crept up to the head. It was silvering the gray
hairs that rested there. Ralph stepped up to the bedside and uncovered
the face. Was it changed since he looked on it last? Last night it was
his father's face: was it laden with iniquity now? How the visible
phantom of one horrible moment must have stood up again and again
before these eyes! How sternly fortune must have frowned on these
features! Yet it was his father's face still.
And what of that father's great account? Who could say what the final
arbitrament would be? Had he who lay there, the father, taken up all
this load of guilt and remorse for love of him, the son? Was he gone
to a dreadful audit, too, and all for love of him? And to know nothing
of it until now--until it was too late to take him by the hand or to
look into his eyes! Nay, to have tortured him unwittingly with a
hundred cruel words! Ralph remembered how in days past he had spoken
bitterly in his father's presence of the man who allowed Simeon Stagg
to rest under an imputation of murder not his own. That murder had
been done to save his own life--however unwisely, however rashly,
still to save his (Ralph's) own life.
Ralph dropped to his knees at the bedside. What barrier had stood
between the dead man and himself that in life the one had never
revealed himself to the other? They were beyond that revealment now,
yet here was everything as in a glass. “Oh, my father,” cried Ralph as
his head fell between his hands, “would that tears of mine could scald
away your offence!”
Then there came back the whisper of the old words, “The lofty looks of
men shall be humbled, and the haughtiness of men shall be bowed down.”
Ralph knelt long at his father's side, and when he rose from his knees
it was with a calmer but a heavier heart.
“Surely God's hand is upon me,” he murmured. The mystery would yield
no other meaning. “Gone to his account with the burden, not of my
guilt, but of my fate, upon him.”
Ralph walked to the fire and turned over the expiring peat. It gave a
fitful flicker. He took from his pocket the paper that had fallen from
his father's breast, and looked long at it in the feeble light. It was
all but the only evidence of the crime, and it must be destroyed. He
put the paper to the light. Drawing it away, he paused and reflected.
He thought of his stricken mother, and his resolve seemed fixed. He
must burn this witness against his father; he must crush the black
shadow of it in his hand. Could he but crush as easily the black
shadow of impending doom! Could he but obliterate as completely the
dread reckoning of another world!
The paper that hung in his hand had touched the flickering peat. It
was already ignited, but he drew it once more away, and crushed the
burning corner to ashes in his palm.
No, it must not be destroyed. He thought of how Rotha had stood over
her father's prostrate form in the room of the village inn, and cried
in her agony, “Tell them it is not true.” Who could say what this
paper might yet do for him and her?
Ralph put the warrant back, charred and crumbled, into the breast
pocket of the jerkin he wore.
The burning of the paper had for a moment filled the chamber with
light. After the last gleam of it had died away, and the ash of the
burnt portion lay in his palm, Ralph walked to the front window and
looked out. All was still. Only the wind whistled. How black against
the moon loomed the brant walls of the Castle Rock across the vale!
Turning about, Ralph re-covered the face and said, “Death is kindest;
how could I look into this face alive?”
And the whisper of the old words came back once more: “The lofty looks
of men shall be humbled, and the haughtiness of men shall be bowed
down.”
Ralph walked to the window at the back and gently pushed it open. It
overlooked the fell and the Shoulthwaite Ghyll. A low roof went down
from it almost to the ground. He stepped out on to this, and stood for
a moment in the shadow that lay upon it.
He must take his last look now. He must bid his last good-night. The
moon through the opposite window still shone on the silvery hair. The
wind was high. It found its way through the open casement. It
fluttered the face-cloth above the face. Ralph pushed back the sash,
and in a moment he was gone.