MY ESCAPE FROM SLAVERY by Frederick Douglass

In the first narrative of my experience in slavery, written nearly forty

years ago, and in various writings since, I have given the public what I

considered very good reasons for withholding the manner of my escape. In

substance these reasons were, first, that such publication at any time

during the existence of slavery might be used by the master against the

slave, and prevent the future escape of any who might adopt the same

means that I did. The second reason was, if possible, still more binding

to silence: the publication of details would certainly have put in peril

the persons and property of those who assisted. Murder itself was not

more sternly and certainly punished in the State of Maryland than that

of aiding and abetting the escape of a slave. Many colored men, for

no other crime than that of giving aid to a fugitive slave, have, like

Charles T. Torrey, perished in prison. The abolition of slavery in my

native State and throughout the country, and the lapse of time, render

the caution hitherto observed no longer necessary. But even since the

abolition of slavery, I have sometimes thought it well enough to baffle

curiosity by saying that while slavery existed there were good reasons

for not telling the manner of my escape, and since slavery had ceased to

exist, there was no reason for telling it. I shall now, however, cease

to avail myself of this formula, and, as far as I can, endeavor to

satisfy this very natural curiosity. I should, perhaps, have yielded to

that feeling sooner, had there been anything very heroic or thrilling

in the incidents connected with my escape, for I am sorry to say I

have nothing of that sort to tell; and yet the courage that could risk

betrayal and the bravery which was ready to encounter death, if need be,

in pursuit of freedom, were essential features in the undertaking. My

success was due to address rather than courage, to good luck rather than

bravery. My means of escape were provided for me by the very men who

were making laws to hold and bind me more securely in slavery.

It was the custom in the State of Maryland to require the free colored

people to have what were called free papers. These instruments they were

required to renew very often, and by charging a fee for this writing,

considerable sums from time to time were collected by the State. In

these papers the name, age, color, height, and form of the freeman were

described, together with any scars or other marks upon his person which

could assist in his identification. This device in some measure defeated

itself--since more than one man could be found to answer the same

general description. Hence many slaves could escape by personating the

owner of one set of papers; and this was often done as follows: A

slave, nearly or sufficiently answering the description set forth in the

papers, would borrow or hire them till by means of them he could escape

to a free State, and then, by mail or otherwise, would return them to

the owner. The operation was a hazardous one for the lender as well as

for the borrower. A failure on the part of the fugitive to send back the

papers would imperil his benefactor, and the discovery of the papers

in possession of the wrong man would imperil both the fugitive and his

friend. It was, therefore, an act of supreme trust on the part of a

freeman of color thus to put in jeopardy his own liberty that another

might be free. It was, however, not unfrequently bravely done, and was

seldom discovered. I was not so fortunate as to resemble any of my free

acquaintances sufficiently to answer the description of their papers.

But I had a friend--a sailor--who owned a sailor's protection, which

answered somewhat the purpose of free papers--describing his person,

and certifying to the fact that he was a free American sailor. The

instrument had at its head the American eagle, which gave it the

appearance at once of an authorized document. This protection, when in

my hands, did not describe its bearer very accurately. Indeed, it called

for a man much darker than myself, and close examination of it would

have caused my arrest at the start.

In order to avoid this fatal scrutiny on the part of railroad officials,

I arranged with Isaac Rolls, a Baltimore hackman, to bring my baggage to

the Philadelphia train just on the moment of starting, and jumped upon

the car myself when the train was in motion. Had I gone into the station

and offered to purchase a ticket, I should have been instantly and

carefully examined, and undoubtedly arrested. In choosing this plan

I considered the jostle of the train, and the natural haste of the

conductor, in a train crowded with passengers, and relied upon my skill

and address in playing the sailor, as described in my protection, to do

the rest. One element in my favor was the kind feeling which prevailed

in Baltimore and other sea-ports at the time, toward "those who go

down to the sea in ships." "Free trade and sailors' rights" just then

expressed the sentiment of the country. In my clothing I was rigged out

in sailor style. I had on a red shirt and a tarpaulin hat, and a black

cravat tied in sailor fashion carelessly and loosely about my neck. My

knowledge of ships and sailor's talk came much to my assistance, for

I knew a ship from stem to stern, and from keelson to cross-trees, and

could talk sailor like an "old salt." I was well on the way to Havre de

Grace before the conductor came into the negro car to collect tickets

and examine the papers of his black passengers. This was a critical

moment in the drama. My whole future depended upon the decision of this

conductor. Agitated though I was while this ceremony was proceeding,

still, externally, at least, I was apparently calm and self-possessed.

He went on with his duty--examining several colored passengers before

reaching me. He was somewhat harsh in tome and peremptory in manner

until he reached me, when, strange enough, and to my surprise and

relief, his whole manner changed. Seeing that I did not readily produce

my free papers, as the other colored persons in the car had done, he

said to me, in friendly contrast with his bearing toward the others:

"I suppose you have your free papers?"

To which I answered:

"No sir; I never carry my free papers to sea with me."

"But you have something to show that you are a freeman, haven't you?"

"Yes, sir," I answered; "I have a paper with the American Eagle on it,

and that will carry me around the world."

With this I drew from my deep sailor's pocket my seaman's protection, as

before described. The merest glance at the paper satisfied him, and he

took my fare and went on about his business. This moment of time was one

of the most anxious I ever experienced. Had the conductor looked closely

at the paper, he could not have failed to discover that it called for

a very different-looking person from myself, and in that case it would

have been his duty to arrest me on the instant, and send me back to

Baltimore from the first station. When he left me with the assurance

that I was all right, though much relieved, I realized that I was still

in great danger: I was still in Maryland, and subject to arrest at any

moment. I saw on the train several persons who would have known me in

any other clothes, and I feared they might recognize me, even in my

sailor "rig," and report me to the conductor, who would then subject me

to a closer examination, which I knew well would be fatal to me.

Though I was not a murderer fleeing from justice, I felt perhaps quite

as miserable as such a criminal. The train was moving at a very high

rate of speed for that epoch of railroad travel, but to my anxious mind

it was moving far too slowly. Minutes were hours, and hours were days

during this part of my flight. After Maryland, I was to pass through

Delaware--another slave State, where slave-catchers generally awaited

their prey, for it was not in the interior of the State, but on its

borders, that these human hounds were most vigilant and active. The

border lines between slavery and freedom were the dangerous ones for the

fugitives. The heart of no fox or deer, with hungry hounds on his trail

in full chase, could have beaten more anxiously or noisily than did mine

from the time I left Baltimore till I reached Philadelphia. The passage

of the Susquehanna River at Havre de Grace was at that time made by

ferry-boat, on board of which I met a young colored man by the name of

Nichols, who came very near betraying me. He was a "hand" on the boat,

but, instead of minding his business, he insisted upon knowing me, and

asking me dangerous questions as to where I was going, when I was coming

back, etc. I got away from my old and inconvenient acquaintance as soon

as I could decently do so, and went to another part of the boat. Once

across the river, I encountered a new danger. Only a few days before,

I had been at work on a revenue cutter, in Mr. Price's ship-yard in

Baltimore, under the care of Captain McGowan. On the meeting at this

point of the two trains, the one going south stopped on the track just

opposite to the one going north, and it so happened that this Captain

McGowan sat at a window where he could see me very distinctly, and

would certainly have recognized me had he looked at me but for a second.

Fortunately, in the hurry of the moment, he did not see me; and the

trains soon passed each other on their respective ways. But this was not

my only hair-breadth escape. A German blacksmith whom I knew well was on

the train with me, and looked at me very intently, as if he thought he

had seen me somewhere before in his travels. I really believe he knew

me, but had no heart to betray me. At any rate, he saw me escaping and

held his peace.

The last point of imminent danger, and the one I dreaded most,

was Wilmington. Here we left the train and took the steam-boat for

Philadelphia. In making the change here I again apprehended arrest, but

no one disturbed me, and I was soon on the broad and beautiful Delaware,

speeding away to the Quaker City. On reaching Philadelphia in the

afternoon, I inquired of a colored man how I could get on to New York.

He directed me to the William-street depot, and thither I went, taking

the train that night. I reached New York Tuesday morning, having

completed the journey in less than twenty-four hours.

My free life began on the third of September, 1838. On the morning of

the fourth of that month, after an anxious and most perilous but safe

journey, I found myself in the big city of New York, a FREE MAN--one

more added to the mighty throng which, like the confused waves of the

troubled sea, surged to and fro between the lofty walls of Broadway.

Though dazzled with the wonders which met me on every hand, my thoughts

could not be much withdrawn from my strange situation. For the moment,

the dreams of my youth and the hopes of my manhood were completely

fulfilled. The bonds that had held me to "old master" were broken. No

man now had a right to call me his slave or assert mastery over me. I

was in the rough and tumble of an outdoor world, to take my chance with

the rest of its busy number. I have often been asked how I felt when

first I found myself on free soil. There is scarcely anything in my

experience about which I could not give a more satisfactory answer. A

new world had opened upon me. If life is more than breath and the "quick

round of blood," I lived more in that one day than in a year of my slave

life. It was a time of joyous excitement which words can but tamely

describe. In a letter written to a friend soon after reaching New York,

I said: "I felt as one might feel upon escape from a den of hungry

lions." Anguish and grief, like darkness and rain, may be depicted; but

gladness and joy, like the rainbow, defy the skill of pen or pencil.

During ten or fifteen years I had been, as it were, dragging a heavy

chain which no strength of mine could break; I was not only a slave, but

a slave for life. I might become a husband, a father, an aged man, but

through all, from birth to death, from the cradle to the grave, I had

felt myself doomed. All efforts I had previously made to secure my

freedom had not only failed, but had seemed only to rivet my fetters the

more firmly, and to render my escape more difficult. Baffled, entangled,

and discouraged, I had at times asked myself the question, May not my

condition after all be God's work, and ordered for a wise purpose, and

if so, Is not submission my duty? A contest had in fact been going on

in my mind for a long time, between the clear consciousness of right and

the plausible make-shifts of theology and superstition. The one held me

an abject slave--a prisoner for life, punished for some transgression

in which I had no lot nor part; and the other counseled me to manly

endeavor to secure my freedom. This contest was now ended; my chains

were broken, and the victory brought me unspeakable joy.

But my gladness was short-lived, for I was not yet out of the reach and

power of the slave-holders. I soon found that New York was not quite so

free or so safe a refuge as I had supposed, and a sense of loneliness

and insecurity again oppressed me most sadly. I chanced to meet on the

street, a few hours after my landing, a fugitive slave whom I had once

known well in slavery. The information received from him alarmed me. The

fugitive in question was known in Baltimore as "Allender's Jake," but in

New York he wore the more respectable name of "William Dixon." Jake, in

law, was the property of Doctor Allender, and Tolly Allender, the son

of the doctor, had once made an effort to recapture MR. DIXON, but

had failed for want of evidence to support his claim. Jake told me the

circumstances of this attempt, and how narrowly he escaped being sent

back to slavery and torture. He told me that New York was then full

of Southerners returning from the Northern watering-places; that the

colored people of New York were not to be trusted; that there were hired

men of my own color who would betray me for a few dollars; that there

were hired men ever on the lookout for fugitives; that I must trust

no man with my secret; that I must not think of going either upon the

wharves or into any colored boarding-house, for all such places were

closely watched; that he was himself unable to help me; and, in fact, he

seemed while speaking to me to fear lest I myself might be a spy and

a betrayer. Under this apprehension, as I suppose, he showed signs of

wishing to be rid of me, and with whitewash brush in hand, in search of

work, he soon disappeared.

This picture, given by poor "Jake," of New York, was a damper to my

enthusiasm. My little store of money would soon be exhausted, and since

it would be unsafe for me to go on the wharves for work, and I had no

introductions elsewhere, the prospect for me was far from cheerful. I

saw the wisdom of keeping away from the ship-yards, for, if pursued, as

I felt certain I should be, Mr. Auld, my "master," would naturally seek

me there among the calkers. Every door seemed closed against me. I was

in the midst of an ocean of my fellow-men, and yet a perfect stranger

to every one. I was without home, without acquaintance, without money,

without credit, without work, and without any definite knowledge as to

what course to take, or where to look for succor. In such an extremity,

a man had something besides his new-born freedom to think of. While

wandering about the streets of New York, and lodging at least one

night among the barrels on one of the wharves, I was indeed free--from

slavery, but free from food and shelter as well. I kept my secret to

myself as long as I could, but I was compelled at last to seek some

one who would befriend me without taking advantage of my destitution

to betray me. Such a person I found in a sailor named Stuart, a

warm-hearted and generous fellow, who, from his humble home on Centre

street, saw me standing on the opposite sidewalk, near the Tombs prison.

As he approached me, I ventured a remark to him which at once enlisted

his interest in me. He took me to his home to spend the night, and in

the morning went with me to Mr. David Ruggles, the secretary of the New

York Vigilance Committee, a co-worker with Isaac T. Hopper, Lewis and

Arthur Tappan, Theodore S. Wright, Samuel Cornish, Thomas Downing,

Philip A. Bell, and other true men of their time. All these (save Mr.

Bell, who still lives, and is editor and publisher of a paper called the

"Elevator," in San Francisco) have finished their work on earth. Once in

the hands of these brave and wise men, I felt comparatively safe. With

Mr. Ruggles, on the corner of Lispenard and Church streets, I was hidden

several days, during which time my intended wife came on from Baltimore

at my call, to share the burdens of life with me. She was a free woman,

and came at once on getting the good news of my safety. We were

married by Rev. J. W. C. Pennington, then a well-known and respected

Presbyterian minister. I had no money with which to pay the marriage

fee, but he seemed well pleased with our thanks.

Mr. Ruggles was the first officer on the "Underground Railroad" whom I

met after coming North, and was, indeed, the only one with whom I had

anything to do till I became such an officer myself. Learning that my

trade was that of a calker, he promptly decided that the best place

for me was in New Bedford, Mass. He told me that many ships for whaling

voyages were fitted out there, and that I might there find work at my

trade and make a good living. So, on the day of the marriage ceremony,

we took our little luggage to the steamer JOHN W. RICHMOND, which, at

that time, was one of the line running between New York and Newport,

R. I. Forty-three years ago colored travelers were not permitted in the

cabin, nor allowed abaft the paddle-wheels of a steam vessel. They were

compelled, whatever the weather might be,--whether cold or hot, wet or

dry,--to spend the night on deck. Unjust as this regulation was, it

did not trouble us much; we had fared much harder before. We arrived at

Newport the next morning, and soon after an old fashioned stage-coach,

with "New Bedford" in large yellow letters on its sides, came down to

the wharf. I had not money enough to pay our fare, and stood hesitating

what to do. Fortunately for us, there were two Quaker gentlemen who were

about to take passage on the stage,--Friends William C. Taber and

Joseph Ricketson,--who at once discerned our true situation, and, in a

peculiarly quiet way, addressing me, Mr. Taber said: "Thee get in." I

never obeyed an order with more alacrity, and we were soon on our way to

our new home. When we reached "Stone Bridge" the passengers alighted

for breakfast, and paid their fares to the driver. We took no breakfast,

and, when asked for our fares, I told the driver I would make it right

with him when we reached New Bedford. I expected some objection to this

on his part, but he made none. When, however, we reached New Bedford, he

took our baggage, including three music-books,--two of them collections

by Dyer, and one by Shaw,--and held them until I was able to redeem them

by paying to him the amount due for our rides. This was soon done, for

Mr. Nathan Johnson not only received me kindly and hospitably, but, on

being informed about our baggage, at once loaned me the two dollars

with which to square accounts with the stage-driver. Mr. and Mrs. Nathan

Johnson reached a good old age, and now rest from their labors. I am

under many grateful obligations to them. They not only "took me in

when a stranger" and "fed me when hungry," but taught me how to make an

honest living. Thus, in a fortnight after my flight from Maryland, I

was safe in New Bedford, a citizen of the grand old commonwealth of

Massachusetts.

Once initiated into my new life of freedom and assured by Mr. Johnson

that I need not fear recapture in that city, a comparatively unimportant

question arose as to the name by which I should be known thereafter in

my new relation as a free man. The name given me by my dear mother was

no less pretentious and long than Frederick Augustus Washington Bailey.

I had, however, while living in Maryland, dispensed with the Augustus

Washington, and retained only Frederick Bailey. Between Baltimore and

New Bedford, the better to conceal myself from the slave-hunters, I had

parted with Bailey and called myself Johnson; but in New Bedford I

found that the Johnson family was already so numerous as to cause some

confusion in distinguishing them, hence a change in this name seemed

desirable. Nathan Johnson, mine host, placed great emphasis upon

this necessity, and wished me to allow him to select a name for me. I

consented, and he called me by my present name--the one by which I have

been known for three and forty years--Frederick Douglass. Mr. Johnson

had just been reading the "Lady of the Lake," and so pleased was he with

its great character that he wished me to bear his name. Since reading

that charming poem myself, I have often thought that, considering the

noble hospitality and manly character of Nathan Johnson--black man

though he was--he, far more than I, illustrated the virtues of the

Douglas of Scotland. Sure am I that, if any slave-catcher had entered

his domicile with a view to my recapture, Johnson would have shown

himself like him of the "stalwart hand."

The reader may be surprised at the impressions I had in some way

conceived of the social and material condition of the people at the

North. I had no proper idea of the wealth, refinement, enterprise, and

high civilization of this section of the country. My "Columbian Orator,"

almost my only book, had done nothing to enlighten me concerning

Northern society. I had been taught that slavery was the bottom fact

of all wealth. With this foundation idea, I came naturally to the

conclusion that poverty must be the general condition of the people of

the free States. In the country from which I came, a white man holding

no slaves was usually an ignorant and poverty-stricken man, and men

of this class were contemptuously called "poor white trash." Hence I

supposed that, since the non-slave-holders at the South were ignorant,

poor, and degraded as a class, the non-slave-holders at the North must

be in a similar condition. I could have landed in no part of the

United States where I should have found a more striking and gratifying

contrast, not only to life generally in the South, but in the condition

of the colored people there, than in New Bedford. I was amazed when Mr.

Johnson told me that there was nothing in the laws or constitution of

Massachusetts that would prevent a colored man from being governor of

the State, if the people should see fit to elect him. There, too, the

black man's children attended the public schools with the white man's

children, and apparently without objection from any quarter. To impress

me with my security from recapture and return to slavery, Mr. Johnson

assured me that no slave-holder could take a slave out of New Bedford;

that there were men there who would lay down their lives to save me from

such a fate.

The fifth day after my arrival, I put on the clothes of a common

laborer, and went upon the wharves in search of work. On my way down

Union street I saw a large pile of coal in front of the house of Rev.

Ephraim Peabody, the Unitarian minister. I went to the kitchen door and

asked the privilege of bringing in and putting away this coal. "What

will you charge?" said the lady. "I will leave that to you, madam." "You

may put it away," she said. I was not long in accomplishing the

job, when the dear lady put into my hand TWO SILVER HALF-DOLLARS. To

understand the emotion which swelled my heart as I clasped this money,

realizing that I had no master who could take it from me,--THAT IT WAS

MINE--THAT MY HANDS WERE MY OWN, and could earn more of the precious

coin,--one must have been in some sense himself a slave. My next job was

stowing a sloop at Uncle Gid. Howland's wharf with a cargo of oil for

New York. I was not only a freeman, but a free working-man, and no

"master" stood ready at the end of the week to seize my hard earnings.

The season was growing late and work was plenty. Ships were being fitted

out for whaling, and much wood was used in storing them. The sawing

this wood was considered a good job. With the help of old Friend Johnson

(blessings on his memory) I got a saw and "buck," and went at it. When

I went into a store to buy a cord with which to brace up my saw in the

frame, I asked for a "fip's" worth of cord. The man behind the counter

looked rather sharply at me, and said with equal sharpness, "You don't

belong about here." I was alarmed, and thought I had betrayed myself.

A fip in Maryland was six and a quarter cents, called fourpence in

Massachusetts. But no harm came from the "fi'penny-bit" blunder, and I

confidently and cheerfully went to work with my saw and buck. It was new

business to me, but I never did better work, or more of it, in the same

space of time on the plantation for Covey, the negro-breaker, than I did

for myself in these earliest years of my freedom.

Notwithstanding the just and humane sentiment of New Bedford three and

forty years ago, the place was not entirely free from race and color

prejudice. The good influence of the Roaches, Rodmans, Arnolds,

Grinnells, and Robesons did not pervade all classes of its people. The

test of the real civilization of the community came when I applied for

work at my trade, and then my repulse was emphatic and decisive. It so

happened that Mr. Rodney French, a wealthy and enterprising citizen,

distinguished as an anti-slavery man, was fitting out a vessel for

a whaling voyage, upon which there was a heavy job of calking and

coppering to be done. I had some skill in both branches, and applied

to Mr. French for work. He, generous man that he was, told me he would

employ me, and I might go at once to the vessel. I obeyed him, but upon

reaching the float-stage, where others [sic] calkers were at work, I

was told that every white man would leave the ship, in her unfinished

condition, if I struck a blow at my trade upon her. This uncivil,

inhuman, and selfish treatment was not so shocking and scandalous in

my eyes at the time as it now appears to me. Slavery had inured me to

hardships that made ordinary trouble sit lightly upon me. Could I have

worked at my trade I could have earned two dollars a day, but as a

common laborer I received but one dollar. The difference was of great

importance to me, but if I could not get two dollars, I was glad to

get one; and so I went to work for Mr. French as a common laborer. The

consciousness that I was free--no longer a slave--kept me cheerful under

this, and many similar proscriptions, which I was destined to meet

in New Bedford and elsewhere on the free soil of Massachusetts. For

instance, though colored children attended the schools, and were treated

kindly by their teachers, the New Bedford Lyceum refused, till several

years after my residence in that city, to allow any colored person to

attend the lectures delivered in its hall. Not until such men as Charles

Sumner, Theodore Parker, Ralph Waldo Emerson, and Horace Mann refused

to lecture in their course while there was such a restriction, was it

abandoned.

Becoming satisfied that I could not rely on my trade in New Bedford to

give me a living, I prepared myself to do any kind of work that came to

hand. I sawed wood, shoveled coal, dug cellars, moved rubbish from back

yards, worked on the wharves, loaded and unloaded vessels, and scoured

their cabins.

I afterward got steady work at the brass-foundry owned by Mr. Richmond.

My duty here was to blow the bellows, swing the crane, and empty the

flasks in which castings were made; and at times this was hot and heavy

work. The articles produced here were mostly for ship work, and in the

busy season the foundry was in operation night and day. I have often

worked two nights and every working day of the week. My foreman, Mr.

Cobb, was a good man, and more than once protected me from abuse that

one or more of the hands was disposed to throw upon me. While in this

situation I had little time for mental improvement. Hard work, night and

day, over a furnace hot enough to keep the metal running like water,

was more favorable to action than thought; yet here I often nailed a

newspaper to the post near my bellows, and read while I was performing

the up and down motion of the heavy beam by which the bellows was

inflated and discharged. It was the pursuit of knowledge under

difficulties, and I look back to it now, after so many years, with some

complacency and a little wonder that I could have been so earnest and

persevering in any pursuit other than for my daily bread. I certainly

saw nothing in the conduct of those around to inspire me with such

interest: they were all devoted exclusively to what their hands found

to do. I am glad to be able to say that, during my engagement in this

foundry, no complaint was ever made against me that I did not do my

work, and do it well. The bellows which I worked by main strength was,

after I left, moved by a steam-engine.

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