AVOIDING COLD MURDER
SWARMS OF BAGMEN--JESUITICAL METHODS--MYSTERIOUS
DISAPPEARANCES--UNACCOUNTABLE ACCIDENTS--AVOIDING A
DUEL--FASCINATED BY A HUNGARIAN--A LUDICROUS TRAVELLER--FRACAS AT A
THEATRE--INSULT, ASSAULT, AND CHALLENGE--CHOOSING
WEAPONS--DIFFICULTIES OVERCOME--FIXING DETAILS--EARLY
TRAVELLING--DÉNOUEMENT--"AM TAG."
Germans in neutral countries during the war were circumspect. They
swarmed everywhere, and never in the history of commercial enterprise
since the world began were seen so many commercial travellers as the
Fatherland provided, at such "kolossal" expense and for such little
return.
Nearly every one of those men without exception was in the direct pay of
the German Secret Service. It was part of their work to nose into
everything, to shadow everyone believed to be foreign to the land they
visited, or who showed any sympathy for the enemies of Germany, or
antagonism towards their country.
If they desired to or had received a direct order to stop by any means
the activities of another, those men rarely came out into the open. They
much preferred ways that are dark and tricks that are deep to achieve
their desired ends. The depths to which their cunning sank had to be
experienced to be believed.
During the years 1914 and 1915, when I was employed in the B.F.S.S. in
Northern Europe, several most extraordinary accidents occurred, from
which I had miraculous escapes. At the time I put them down to
incidents. I think very differently now.
Verily Prussian methods in all things seem to be Jesuitical, in that it
is believed the end justifies the means. If one of their employees in
their own, Secret Service, no matter what his station of life may be,
gets to know too much, his fate may be sealed by a secret sentence of
death passed in the Wilhelmstrasse, and the supreme penalty is inflicted
in a manner unsuspected by the unfortunate victim.
Dr. Armgaard Karl Graves records in his book, "The Secrets of the German
War Office," how the woman Olga Bruder, whose death in an hotel on the
Russian frontier was returned to the Press as suicide, was in reality
poisoned; how young Lieutenant Zastrov was challenged to repeated duels
until he was killed in one of them; and how others suspecting trouble
avoided it by escape. Otto Diesel, we know, disappeared from the Harwich
boat when on his way to England to exploit his engines which the Germans
had bought. What happened to Frederick Krupp of Essen, no one knows.
Presumably executive workers in the German Secret Service knew as much
about these things as Dr. Graves did himself. Perhaps it is part of
their training and instruction to attempt to involve representatives of
other nations with whom they come in contact and whose energies may be
considered prejudicial or annoying to them, in quarrels or in brawls
where a blow can be struck which it might be difficult if not impossible
to trace. It must be more than a coincidence that Secret Service agents
often find themselves in the middle of a small crowd where the
pick-pocketing fraternity are undoubtedly represented. Be as careful,
polite, and inoffensive as possible, quick-tempered, irascible
irreconcilables will at times attempt to pick a quarrel. Boats,
motor-cars, and other vehicles by which Secret Service agents travel
often meet with mysterious and altogether unaccountable accidents,
whilst a challenge to a duel, for some trifling cause, is an experience
which more than one of them has had to endure and to evade as best he
can.
I chuckle now as I remember how I passed through one of these ordeals,
not a hundred miles from the Rathhaus of Kiel. The incident took place
very shortly before this world-war had actually begun. I have happily
only received the very doubtful honour of one challenge since, which I
insisted on treating as a practical joke, wisely absenting myself
before developments could make the situation serious and untenable.
Both these incidents arose through polite assistance being rendered to a
lady in distress.
The former typically exemplifies German methods, whilst its details
cannot be considered devoid of interest.
I had for some years been prowling round on erratic wildfowling
expeditions in the Baltic and along the western coast of Schleswig
Holstein. My operations were at times based from the Esbjerg fjord, but
I was no respecter of frontiers and there had been trouble whenever I
had drifted too far south with the officious and zealous guardians of
the German coast. I had previously, when travelling on business and
pleasure combined, known trouble at both Berlin and Potsdam; later on at
and near to Hamburg. Apparently I was not popular with a certain section
of German officialdom. Perhaps I had become too well known; that might
or might not have been. Anyhow, for a long period before the war all
German officials showed nervous hysteria in relation to suspected
espionage regarding any Britisher who exhibited the smallest interest in
the Heligoland district or the western islands, Kiel Canal, and Kiel
Harbour. Yet I paid about as much attention to official fussiness as I
would have done to a pinch of salt.
One memorable winter I had travelled north as usual, little thinking
that any adventure would befall me.
At Osnabruck, where the lower level railway connects up with the higher,
passengers have to ascend a steep flight of steps, the only means of
communication between the two platforms. A certain young lady of
Hungarian extraction, on the occasion in question, regarding whom it had
better be stated at the outset that she was exceedingly fair to look
upon and still more attractive in her manners, was overloaded with small
hand-parcels and wraps. No porter was available, and common politeness
dictated that such assistance as one was capable of rendering should be
proffered.
The natural sequence of events led to an informal acquaintanceship, and
the journey was continued in a jointly-occupied _coupé_. This
compartment was also shared by other travellers, including a small,
extraordinary-looking eccentric who covered his head with a kind of wire
entanglement resembling the skeleton framework of a lampshade, over
which he drew a green silk cover in order to shade his eyes from the
glare of the lamplight, so that he could sleep without any
inconvenience. The whole thing looked so ludicrous that one's risible
faculties were tickled. I laughed so much I had to retire to the gangway
in order to relieve my feelings without hurting the stranger's feelings
by outward rudeness. The aforesaid Hungarian lady found herself in
similar straits. Mutual converse naturally ensued.
Ascertaining that Kiel happened to be our common destination, what more
natural than we should select the same hotel to stay at? After dinner,
in order to kill time as pleasantly as could be, we visited a local
place of amusement where a musical farce was being performed and the
stalls were filled with military and naval officers. My companion had
informed me that her father was the commander of a fortress on the
Baltic, that she had two brothers, one a lieutenant in the Navy and the
other in the Army. Whilst waiting between the acts a young officer of
overbearing, vulgar, swaggering type, which Zabern brought into
world-wide prominence, entered our private box and claimed
acquaintanceship. He was more or less intoxicated, and obnoxiously
effusive. He would order champagne, and plenty of it, in spite of all
protests to the contrary. He also fetched another officer, whom he
stated to be a connection by marriage with the lady, but whom she failed
to recognise or to remember. Not appreciating nor being flattered by
these attentions, an early attempt was made to cover a polite quittance
with plausible excuses, but such an escape was not permitted. In due
course, as the wine flowed, the officer's temperament changed from
gushing effusiveness to the quarrelsome stage. Instinct foretold
unpleasantness, which was not long in the coming. The two officers first
quarrelled between themselves, then one of them accused me of an
unfriendly act. Whether it was imagination or wilful design on his part
I know not, but the accusation was followed by open insult in action as
well as words.
Wishing to do everything I could to smooth matters over and avoid as
much publicity as possible, I rapidly collected my companion's wraps and
got her out of the box. As I was doing this one of the lieutenants threw
a glass of champagne in my face accompanied by an epithet against which
even Job himself would have protested. It therefore became necessary to
administer one of those gentle little all-British reminders, which
landed home so unexpectedly and suddenly that the aggressor tripped
backwards over the chairs and collapsed on the bosom of his companion,
both falling in a mixed heap upon the floor. It was difficult to
distinguish which limbs belonged to each respectively, intermingled as
they were with the table, the chairs, the bubbling wine and broken
glass.
I escorted my lady friend back to the hotel.
Two hours later a couple of very serious middle-aged officers of some
rank and distinction visited me. They demanded an audience with the
foreigner and sent up their cards. They had come to arrange matters for
their friends, and they refused to listen to any explanation or
arguments relating to the true facts of the case. All they knew or would
admit was that a blow had been struck, their uniform insulted, and the
dignity of the two officers of the Imperial Forces had been rolled in
the dust. Satisfaction to both must be accorded at the first available
opportunity and in accordance with the custom of Imperial Germany. As
the principal actor in the affair happened to be a stranger in a strange
land, the hospitality of two friends of unimpeachable integrity should
be provided to his commands. Meanwhile full apologies were tendered for
the lateness of the hour of calling and for the rather informal
procedure; but the visitors seemed over-anxious to fix preliminary
arrangements, presumably as a caution against the possibility of any
sudden departure.
Which of the usual weapons did I prefer?
Perhaps it is needless to say that my then inclinations leaned towards
neither of them, nor to anything of a pugnacious character. I freely
said so. They replied that "a choice must be made or a difficulty would
arise which could not be easily surmounted. No; it must be in accordance
with the recognised code of military honour."
"Very well, then," I quietly replied; "fists or single-sticks are good
enough for me."
The look on their faces seemed to imply that insult had been added to
injury. Such a proposal was most unacceptable and preposterous. They
came back to the original weapons and insisted upon a selection being
named, which I settled by telling them to provide both. Their next
proposition caused a deadlock to further negotiations. They wanted to
fix the meeting in a named wood, some little distance from the suburbs
of the town, at the early hour of six on the following morning.
Bowing very politely, I smiled. It was the first smile that had crossed
the countenance of anyone of the participants at that memorable
interview. "Gentlemen," I commenced, "you may like early hours; they may
agree with your constitution and methods of living, but you cannot
persuade a civilian gentleman to rise until the world has been properly
aired. We English are as regular in our habits as you may be. We go to
bed at midnight. We are called at 8 a.m., and we have breakfast--a good
substantial repast _à la fourchette_--at 9 a.m. We must read the
morning's news-sheet. After 10 a.m. we are at the disposal of our
friends. You may have your own way in any other details or particulars
of this unfortunate little misunderstanding you please, but upon this
point I remain adamant."
Again I bowed to each of them, and although serious enough to all
outward appearances, I was chuckling inwardly, because at last I saw a
silver lining to the ominous clouds which had so suddenly and so
unexpectedly enveloped me.
The English nation flatters itself and is justly proud of its sporting
instincts. But it looks with horror upon duelling as being little short
of murder. Our national sense of fair play and justice abhors the
thought of any expert being matched against an amateur; more
particularly in a contest where the skill of each party is unequal, or
one of them can easily overmatch the other.
I personally would never attempt the permanent injury of a fellow-being,
unless forced into a fight and the doing of it was the only way of
saving life. I knew nothing of swordsmanship, nor had I ever practised
with the foils. As a revolver shot I was a very doubtful performer, and
they are difficult little things to use at any time. I had no quarrel
with the two unmannerly cads who had forced themselves uninvited and
unwelcomed upon my privacy. All differences had been settled and wiped
off the slate with one small wave of the arm. Why, therefore, should I
now seek their lives, or to do them some serious bodily harm? If anyone
was aggrieved, surely I was entitled to all sympathy. Why, therefore,
should they now seek to destroy me? Little did I know that "Am Tag" was
hovering so near at hand.
On these points, however, my mind was not only quite clear but it was
quite made up. The meeting must be arranged for 11 a.m. on the morrow or
it must be postponed to some more convenient and suitable date.
When my visitors shook their heads and demurred I became indignant. I
reminded them of the condition in which I had left those whom they
represented. I pointed out the obvious fact that the intervening time
was not sufficient for them to sleep off the fumes and effects of the
excess of alcohol which they were undoubtedly suffering from; whilst as
a final and unanswerable argument I hammered home the fact that I had
not yet been introduced to the gentlemen who would act as my friends at
this very important meeting. If not an insult to them it certainly would
be an insult to me, to be invited or even expected to meet in honourable
(?) combat, opponents who were not perfectly sober, or who might be
severely handicapped in consequence of the continuing effects of their
over-night insobriety.
I enlarged on this, speaking in latent sarcasm which, needless to say,
was absolutely lost upon my visitors. Perhaps it was best for my
personal safety that it was so. Their highly-educated super-kultur
would prevent them from appreciating such, or understanding it. I said
that any combat in which a preponderance of advantage rested on one side
or the other could not be tolerated by any honourable gentleman, who
never minded accepting odds, providing these odds were against himself.
But he would consider it low and mean and altogether unworthy to take
advantage of an opponent unless equality and fair play could be ensured.
For my part I insisted that those whom they represented should have full
opportunities of equal combat; in other words, that they should have
time to get sober.
These honeyed sentiments clinched the business. My visitors bowed most
politely and replied, "Having heard your explanations, we fully realise,
as gentlemen speaking for and acting on behalf of gentlemen" (God save
the mark!) "that we cannot do otherwise than accept your reasons and act
accordingly." Thus they agreed to fix the meeting by mutual consent for
eleven the following morning, and with an exchange of courtesies on all
sides we parted company.
* * * * *
According to the local railway time-tables, a slow train was advertised
as departing south for Hamburg at the early hour of 4 a.m. or a little
after; whilst a fast train, running between Hamburg and the north of
Denmark, stopped a few minutes at Neumunster about 7 a.m. Neumunster is
the junction station for the Kiel Canal on the main Hamburg, Altona,
Rensburg, Schleswig, Flensburg, Wogens, Vamdrup, Kolding line, and
connecting up Fredericia and Copenhagen by the boat train _via_ Esbjerg.
* * * * *
At 3.30 a.m., long before the hour of dawn, a silent shadow glided along
the deserted streets of Kiel. A meek voice at the palatial
railway-station in very guttural German requested a third-class ticket
by the slow train to Hamburg. This modest traveller left the train at
Neumunster, but no one appeared to notice he had broken his journey, or
that he quietly disappeared from view on the station platform until the
fast northward-bound train bustled in. In fact, he was so muffled up,
and he gripped his handbag so tightly, that he did not appear to be
worth ten pfennig in return for any railway official's attention; whilst
other travellers were far too occupied by their own concerns to trouble
about his existence.
* * * * *
When the world had indeed become properly aired and the morning sun had
risen far above the housetops, the landlord of a certain hotel in Kiel
might have been seen standing at the entrance of his hostelry. A
self-satisfied smile suffused his fat face, and both his hands were
dived well down into capacious trouser-pockets, wherein he kept turning
over coin after coin, whilst he puzzled his slow-working brains in vain
to find a solution to account for the mad eccentricities of all
foreigners in general; in particular those lunatics who seemed to prefer
night-travelling on any uncomfortable train to snug, warm beds; and who
left notes of unintelligible explanation, enclosing double the
remuneration necessary for the so-called luxuries supplied by his hotel.
* * * * *
About the same time a lattice window in an upper storey of the same
hotel was thrown open, and a sweet-faced maiden, having an Hungarian
type of beauty, leaned out upon the window-sill, permitting the full
rays of the morning sun to light up the beauties of her face, form, and
figure. She was reading a letter which she had found pushed under her
bedroom door whilst she had wandered in dreamland through the fairy
glades of fancy during her innocent girlish repose. She frowned as she
read it and stamped her foot in disappointment at the postscript,
muttering the while to herself:
"No, we shan't meet in Paris next month, because I don't know whether I
can get there. I'll come after you now."
* * * * *
At twelve noon, in a small clearing on the outskirts of a wood a few
kilomètres from the town of Kiel, three carriages were drawn into the
seclusion of the tree-trunks. The horses attached thereto stamped
impatiently. Either they were very fresh or they had been waiting too
long. Further in amongst the trees was a party of men talking earnestly
to one another. They were military officers, and a doctor was with them.
They appeared to be expecting somebody to arrive, or something of
importance to happen. At last one of them, kicking furiously at a small
bush, asked his companion, a man much older than himself, "What was that
idiotic proviso you spoke about? 'You cannot persuade a civilian
gentleman to rise until the world has been properly aired'? We ought to
have spitted him when we had the chance!"
"My dear Fritz," replied his companion, "you never did have the chance;
what is still more clear to me now is the fact that you never will. But
if he's one of those _Swinehund Engländer_--if so, then--_mein Gott! Am
Tag!_" Saying which he viciously spat upon the turf.