In truth I do not know whether I felt dismayed or glad. It was as if I
were in a dream.
Since I had begun to take cocaine again, that twilight sensation of
unreality had descended anew like a misty veil upon all my perceptions.
I could not distinguish facts from illusions. Prilukoff had immediately
disappeared--or had I only fancied that I saw him?
Trembling a little, I rose from my place, and while many of the guests
were still talking and laughing with their host I excused myself on the
plea of fatigue. They toasted me a last time, and Kamarowsky kissed me
ceremoniously before them all.
With cheeks and heart aflame I hurried to my apartments, glad to think
that I should find them dark and silent. My temples were throbbing, the
coronet of diamonds--a gift of Kamarowsky's--weighed heavy on my brow, and
my eyes seemed to be pierced with red-hot needles.
I opened the door of my sitting-room, where a lamp, turned low,
glimmered like a star veiled in red vapor. Behind it I could see yawning
blackly the open door leading to my bedroom, which was in complete
darkness.
I had a strange feeling that I was not alone. Some one was in the
room--some one whom I could not discern was near to me.
Yes, a footstep approached; a strong arm encircled me. Nicolas Naumoff's
voice spoke in thrilling accents: "Marie! Marie! My heart is breaking."
With a sigh of infinite weariness merging into a sense of infinite
repose I laid my head against his breast. I longed to die. I felt as if
I had nothing more to ask for, nothing more to desire.
But the anguish that was passing from my soul seemed to have entered
into his.
"You must not marry that man! You must not, you shall not!" He gripped
my shoulders as if he would crush them. "Tell me, tell me that you do
not love him."
At that instant on the black background of my bedroom there appeared a
form--Prilukoff! Erect in the doorway he stood watching us. Naumoff had
his back to him, but across his shoulder I looked Prilukoff in the face,
only a few steps from me.
My heart stood still. What would he do?
Knowing as I did his ungovernable frenzies of jealousy, his madness, his
recklessness, I wondered whether he would leap forward and spring at
Naumoff's throat? Would there be blows and groans and a death-struggle
in my tranquil, shadowy room? Would there be a turmoil and a scandal,
during which the bond of infamy that tied me to Prilukoff would be
revealed to Naumoff? Revealed to Kamarowsky and to the world?
The fear of tragedy and disgrace kept me stark and terror-stricken,
rooted to the spot. Then I saw Prilukoff move. Slowly he raised his
right arm. His right hand clutched something which I could not see.
Suddenly--incredible sight!--I saw him open his mouth wide; and never,
never have I seen anything more grotesque and terrifying than that
figure in the darkness with mouth gaping wide....
But still his right arm moved, rising slowly and relentlessly until it
was on a level with that terrible open mouth. What did the hand hold?
Did I not see a gleam of polished metal?
I tried to scream, but no sound issued from my parched throat. I could
see the whites of his staring upturned eyes, and the hand now motionless
just in front of the open mouth--