Seeing that I had recovered my senses Vassili, who stood behind me, laid
an iron hand on my bare shoulder.
"Come," he said in a hoarse and brutal voice. "Come at once."
"Where to?" I rose trembling to my feet. I still felt dizzy and weak,
and scarcely knew where I was.
"Home," said Vassili, bending over me with a terrible look. His face was
so close to mine that I could feel his breath upon me, hot and laden
with that subtle sweetish exhalation of ether that vodka leaves behind
it. "The dance is over," he muttered. "It is over, it is over." I
noticed his clenched fists; and I was afraid. A deep silence had fallen
on the entire room. "Come!" he repeated in a tone that made me quake.
I shrank back in terror. Then Vassili put out his hand and seized my
pearl necklace; it broke in his grasp. The milky gems fell to the ground
and rolled away in all directions; the guests, both men and women,
stooped down to search for them and pick them up.
But now Bozevsky had taken a step forward, and stood, haughty and
aggressive, in front of Vassili. He uttered a brief word in a low voice.
Vassili turned upon him with livid countenance. "Insolent scoundrel!" he
cried, wildly searching his pockets for a weapon; then in a frenzy he
turned on the awe-stricken assembly: "Go away, everybody!" he shouted.
"Stahl, turn out the lights. We are going to have a game of blind man's
buff, the Uhlan and I. A game of blind man's buff in the dark! Quick,
Stahl, give us a couple of revolvers. Send all these people away and
turn out the lights."
He was beside himself with vodka and with wrath.
Bozevsky still faced him, calm and unmoved. "Why should it be in the
dark, Count Tarnowsky? Why not in the light of day--at ten paces?"
"No!" roared Vassili. "I'll kill you in the dark, evil beast that you
are. I'll slaughter you like a wild beast in the dark!"
I never knew how we succeeded in getting him out into the troika, but at
last the feat was accomplished, and he drove off with Madame
Grigorievska and Semenzoff, the only two people who had any influence
over him. I followed in another sleigh, alone with Dr. Stahl, who during
the entire drive panted and shivered beside me, as if in the throes of
some fierce physical agony.
Through the starry calm of the night, while the sleighs glided silently
over the snow, we could hear Vassili's strident and drunken voice still
roaring: "Blind man's buff with the officer! Ha, ha, ha! In the
dark--bing bang. Blind man's buff!"
The scandal in Kieff was enormous. The whole town spoke of nothing else.
All the women sided with Vassili, and all the men with me. As for
Vassili, he cared nothing for the opinion of either. He came and went
with lowering brows, never speaking either to me or to the children.
I was unspeakably frightened and unhappy. At last, one evening, unable
to endure the strain of his silence any longer, and praying God to give
me courage, I went tremblingly and knocked at his study door.
He said "Come in," and I entered.
He was standing by the window, smoking, and he turned upon me a cold
vindictive eye.
"Vassili"--my voice trembled--"Vassili, don't be angry with me any more.
Forgive me. I did not mean to offend you. I did not mean--" I burst into
tears.
He seemed somewhat moved and held out his hand to me without speaking.
I grasped it eagerly. He continued to smoke and look out of the window,
while I stood awkwardly beside him, holding his hand and not knowing
what to say.
Perhaps my silence pleased him, for soon I felt him press my trembling
fingers more closely. Looking timidly up into his face I saw that his
lips were quivering.
"Vassili," I whispered.
He turned to me abruptly. "Let us go away," he said, "Mura, let us go
away!"
"Where?" I asked, overcome with sudden fear.
"Far away from here, far away from Russia. I cannot live in this
accursed country any longer." And Vassili let go my hand in order to
clench his fists.
"I had thought of it, too," I said unsteadily. And in a low voice I told
him my thoughts of the rose-clad house in Italy, my dreams of an azure
exile in that beauteous land, alone with him and the children.
"Mura! Mura!" he said, taking my face between his hands and gazing
deeply into my eyes. "Tell me--is it not too late?"
Was it too late?
In my soul my unlawful passion for Bozevsky rose like a giant wave,
towered over me, enveloped and submerged me. Then--then to the eyes of my
spirit there came the vision of my children, of a flower-filled Italian
garden, of peace reconquered and deliverance from evil. "No, Vassili,
no. It is not too late!"
With a sigh I lay my cheek against his shoulder and bowed my face upon
his breast.
Before our departure from Russia, in order not to leave ill-feeling or
evil talk behind us, it was decided that Vassili and Bozevsky should
meet and be reconciled.
The Stahls and Grigorievskys gladly undertook to organize an afternoon
reception at which we were to take leave of all our friends and
acquaintances. After that there would be a theater party at the opera,
and, finally, the more intimate of our friends were to be the guests of
Bozevsky himself at a supper at the Grand Hotel. There we were to say
farewell to one another for many years, perhaps forever.
In spite of the burning desire which drew me towards Bozevsky, I had
honorably kept my part of the agreement and had refused to see him for
even an instant before the appointed day.
Vassili took the necessary steps to get our passports and every
preparation was made for our final departure from Russia.
And now the eve of our journey had come--the afternoon reception was
over; and this was the fatal evening which was to mark the supreme and
ultimate hour of my happiness.
Satins and jewels decked my aching heart; flowers garlanded my ringleted
hair; I wanted Alexis to see me for the last time looking my fairest. I
longed to remain forever in his memory a loved and radiant vision.
"You are dazzlingly beautiful," said my cousin Vera to me, as soon as I
entered the room, surveying me from top to toe. "I can quite understand
why every one is crazy about you."
I was immediately surrounded by all our most intimate friends, who
lamented in every key our resolve to leave Russia.
"Without you, Kieff will be empty. It will be like a ring which has lost
its brightest gem."