The Opposite Camp.
The Thornleigh family, or at least the feminine portion of it, was, as
has been indicated to the reader, in town--though it was still very
early in the year--for the purpose of looking after little Mary’s
trousseau, as her wedding was to take place at Easter. Lady Augusta’s
family numbered eight altogether--five girls and three boys; and if I
could tell you half the trouble she had gone through with them, you
would no longer wonder at the wrinkles on her forehead. Her girls had
been as troublesome as her boys, which seldom happens, and that was
saying a great deal. Harry, the eldest son, was a prodigal, constantly
in debt and in trouble; John, the second, who, it was hoped, would have
distinguished himself by his brains, had been plucked for his degree;
and the regiment of which Reginald, the youngest son, was an ornament,
had been sent off to India, contrary to all prognostications. As for the
daughters, though the youngest was nineteen, only one was married--a
terrible thought for an anxious mother, as anxious to do her duty by
her children as Lady Augusta was--and that one!
The eldest was Ada, who, when her lover, only a poor clergyman at the
best, died of typhus fever, caught in his work, never would look at
another man, but retired meekly into old maidenhood. The second, Helena,
was the clever one of the family. She had more brains than all the rest
put together, everybody said, and so indeed she herself thought--more
than she knew what to do with. If that head could only have been put on
her brother John’s shoulders, what a blessing to everyone concerned!
for, alas! all the good her brains did her, was to betray her into a
marriage with a very clever and very learned professor, painfully
superior to everybody else, but altogether out of “her own class.” The
third was Gussy, who had been always Lady Augusta’s most dearly beloved,
and who, three years ago, had been all but betrothed to the best match
in the county--young Edgar Arden; but when Edgar was ruined, and
disappeared, as it were, off the face of the earth, Gussy, instead of
abandoning him as a sensible girl should have done, clung with the
obstinacy which distinguished the Thornleighs, to the very recollection
of him--which, as he was still living and marriageable, though no match
at all, was a fanaticism much less manageable than Ada’s. For Ada, if
she insisted upon considering herself a widow, was at all events quite
submissive in other matters, and content to be her mother’s right hand
at home; but Gussy, who had by no means given up her personal
possibilities of happiness, and whose hopes were still alive, had been
very restless, and worried her family with many vagaries. Schemes and
crotchets ran, I suppose, in the noble blood which Lady Augusta had
transmitted to her daughters. It showed itself in different ways in the
sisters: Helena’s ways had been all intellectual, but Gussy, who was
benevolent and religious, was more difficult to deal with. The
melancholy seclusion, which to an English mind is the first
characteristic of a convent, has little to do with the busy beehive of a
modern sisterhood; and a young woman connected with such an institution
has claims made upon her which are wonderfully embarrassing to a
fashionable mother. Helena, in her wildest days, when she had all sorts
of committees going on, could be taken to her meetings and lectures in
the carriage, like a Christian, and could be sent for when these
_séances_ were over; but Gussy had to trudge off on foot to all sorts of
places in her long black cloak, and to visit houses in which fever, and
every kind of evil, physical and moral, abounded; and was not to be
shaken by any remonstrances. Indeed, the parents had been glad to
compromise and consent to any amount of Associateship, so as to keep off
the dreaded possibility of a determination on Gussy’s part to enter the
Sisterhood for good and all. I do not think that Gussy herself ever
threatened this, though she thought of it sometimes as her best
alternative, if--; but there was still an if, a living and strong
peradventure in her mind. Other good-natured friends, however, strongly
pressed the possibility on Lady Augusta’s mind; they did all they could
to persuade the anxious mother to take forcible steps in the matter, and
constrain Gussy, on her obedience, to give up her objectionable
charities and devotions. Fortunately Lady Augusta did not belong to that
class of women who take pleasure in worrying their children for their
good. She shook her head when her pretty daughter, still as pretty as in
her first season, went out in her black cloak, and the hideous bonnet,
which the mother would not allow to herself was “becoming,”
notwithstanding its intrinsic hideousness. She moaned over the dirt, the
disease, the evil smells and sights which her child was about to
encounter, and about the risk of infection to which she would expose
herself.
“Who can tell what you may bring back with you, Gussy?--fever, or one
does not know what,” Lady Augusta said, piteously. “It is so different
with our poor people at home, whom we all know.”
“I will shut myself up in my room, mamma; or I will go to the House,
when there is anything infectious about; but I cannot give up my work,”
said Gussy, filial, but determined.
“Oh, work, child! what do you mean by work?” cried Lady Augusta, driven
to her wits’ end. “Home is surely better than the ‘House,’ as you call
it, and I am sure Ada and I find plenty to do at home. Why cannot you do
as we do?”
“Perhaps because Ada and you do it all,” said Gussy, unmoved by that
despairing appeal which the old is always making to the new. Why cannot
you do as we do?
Poor Lady Augusta! It was she who had to give in, not her daughter. And
you may easily understand, dear reader, how such a good mother was
affected by the break-down of all her elder hopes--Ada, Helena, Gussy.
Her three eldest children--all failures! What a heart-breaking thought
it was to a woman of fashion, surrounded by contemporaries who had
married their daughters well, and whom no man could reproach as
negligent of their highest duties! She would wake sometimes in the
middle of the night, and ask herself was it her fault? Had she put
foolish notions into the heads of the girls? Certainly on the Thornleigh
side there were no “views” nor “crotchets;” and Lady Augusta was aware
that she herself had accomplished her own fate, not altogether because
she preferred it, and had, perhaps, smothered personal predilections,
which her children showed no inclination to smother. “Why cannot they do
as I did?” she would say in her heart, with a sigh.
But now at last a moment had come, in which her natural cares were
rewarded. When Lord Granton proposed for Mary, her mother had almost
cried with joy. For the first time here was a satisfactory--a completely
satisfactory conclusion. So unexceptionable a young man, such a title,
such estates, and a family which any girl might be proud to enter! The
delight was all the sweeter from being so long deferred, so sadly
missed. She forgave Helena her bad match, and Gussy and Ada their no
matches at all, in the exhilaration of this happy moment. All her little
grievances and grudges vanished in the sudden flood of sunshine. She was
reconciled to all the world, even to Helena’s husband, the Professor,
over whom, too, a heavenly radiance would be flung, when he was
brother-in-law to a marquis. Poor Lady Augusta! In the full height of
her exhilaration she betook herself to Tottenham’s to send the good news
to her sister, feeling that now at least, perhaps for the first time,
there was no trouble to lessen her happiness; and there she encountered,
without any warning, Edgar! Heaven help her! a man still more
objectionable, because more hopelessly penniless than Helena’s
professor, a man without a name, without a shilling, without a
connection! but whom Gussy, her favourite daughter, was ready, she knew,
to follow to the end of the world. When she drove out to the rural
Tottenham’s after this, to tell her sister the story of Mary’s
engagement, is it wonderful that her agitated mind should have poured
forth all its mingled strain of joy, tribulation, content, and alarm?
The wholly joyful part of her budget was soon swallowed up in the
revelation of her fears about Gussy, and in the reproaches she could not
quite restrain. Why had her sister so added to her burdens, by this
injudicious, this uncalled-for interference in Edgar’s fortunes? He was
not so friendless, Lady Augusta protested, half indignant, half weeping,
that they, of all the world, should have rushed into the breach, and
taken him up--bringing him even into their house, where he could not
fail to see Gussy one time or other. And then the anxious mother cried,
and told her sister that she had no confidence in Gussy. In Edgar she
had every confidence; he had promised never to thrust himself into her
way; but Gussy had made no such promise, and her mother did not even
dare to speak to her on the subject, knowing that she would be met by
unanswerable arguments. Thus the two ladies, talking over the whole
matter, fell into a not unnatural snare, and resolved to confide in
Edgar, and trust to him to keep Gussy, as well as himself, right--not
foreseeing how that confidence would change to him the whole aspect of
affairs. When Ada heard how far her mother’s revelations had gone, and
of the step Lady Mary was commissioned to take, she did not give it her
approval, as Lady Augusta had hoped, but looked very grave, and doubted
much the wisdom of the proceeding. “He promised never to stand in my
way,” Lady Augusta said, much depressed by her privy-councillor’s
disapproval. “But he did not promise for Gussy--what right would he have
to undertake for Gussy?” said Ada, shaking her head. It was an idea
which had not entered her mother’s mind, for Lady Augusta had that kind
of confidence in Edgar, as of a man born to set everything right, which
women, especially when surrounded by practical difficulties, are so
ready to place in an ideal man. He had never objected to her commands
hitherto; why should he now? Nevertheless, when Ada disappeared, Lady
Augusta began to quake lest she should have done more harm than good.
“We must try to get something for him to do,” she said, faltering,
“something abroad. Notwithstanding all those absurd new arrangements,
people of influence can still command situations abroad, I hope, if they
choose to take the trouble. I shall speak to Lord Millboard, Ada; and I
am sure Granton, dear fellow, would take any trouble, if he knew how
important it was.”
“Because he is happy himself, to prevent poor Gussy from being happy?”
said Ada. “Oh, I am not saying anything against it, mamma. I suppose it
will have to be.”
“Of course it will have to be,” said her mother, “you are all very
unkind--you girls. Not one of you has exerted herself as I had a right
to expect. Do you think that I thought of nothing but pleasing myself
when I married? And who has lost the most in losing Edgar? Well, Gussy,
you may say, in one way; but I too. What a help he would have been to
me! so kind and so understanding. Oh, Ada! if you knew how much it goes
against my heart to shut him out. But it must be; what would your
father--what would every one say?”
To this, Ada could return but little answer, except to murmur something
about “leaving it in the hands of Providence,” which was not so
consolatory to Lady Augusta as it was meant to be.
“It is all very well to say, leave it to Providence!” cried that much
tried mother, “if you had lived as long as I have, Ada, you would have
found that all the most inconvenient things that happen in the world
are said to be brought about by Providence--especially in the way of
marriages. No, we must take precautions; Gussy must not go near
Tottenham’s while he is there; and I’ll tell you what I will do. Harry
is at home doing nothing particular, and probably quarrelling with your
poor papa, who has so much to vex him. I have just been wondering how
they could possibly get on with all of us away. I will write and tell
him to offer himself to your aunt Mary for a visit.”
“Harry! what good will Harry do?” asked Ada, wondering.
“Well, my dear, at least he will be on the spot,” said Lady Augusta; and
she breathed a long sigh, as if a weight had been taken off her mind.
Any stop-gap, however imperfect, which takes, or seems to take, a
responsibility off the mind, is enough to give a sense of relief to one
so overborne by many businesses as Lady Augusta was. “And now, my dear,
let us look over Mary’s patterns,” she said, drawing a chair towards
Ada’s table, on which a mass of samples, of linen, silk, muslin, and
every other fabric, known to human ingenuity, were lying, ticketed and
arranged in packets. This was a little bit of pure enjoyment, which
refreshed the anxious mother in the midst of all her cares.
I need not tell what commotion was made in the household when the news
crept out and stole secretly from one girl to another, that Edgar had
come back. Mary and Beatrice put their curly heads together over it, and
the result was a communication to the young Granton, which effectually
fortified him against making himself a tool of any of poor Lady
Augusta’s schemings to get rid of the danger. These two were the
children of the house, and the elder sisters paid but little attention
to their innocent conspiracies. The elders were more interesting
personages than little Mary and Bee, though Mary was a predestined
marchioness, and there was no knowing what Bee might come to in the way
of matrimonial elevation. There are people, no doubt, who will think the
old maid of the family its least interesting member; but you, dear
unknown friend, my gentle reader, are not of that complexion; and there
may be others who will feel that Ada’s obscure life was a poor enough
thing to settle down to, after all the hopes and all the disappointments
of youth, both of which are more exciting and sustaining than the simple
monotony of such a commonplace existence. I am not sure, however, for my
own part, whether Ada’s soft self-renunciation never expressed in words,
and her constant readiness in trouble, and the numberless frocks she
made for her poor children--and even her mother’s meetings, though the
family laughed at them--were half so bewildering an anti-climax to the
high aspirations of youth as was Helena’s Professor, and the somewhat
humdrum, if highly intellectual routine into which she had dropped with
him. Helena, herself now and then, had a confused and giddy
consciousness that ministering to a man’s comforts, who was not at all a
demi-god, and attending lectures at the Royal Society was a very odd and
sudden downfall from all her dreams of social amelioration and “a great
work;” but fortunately she was happy, a thing which deadens the moral
perception. Ada was happy, too, in her different way; but Gussy was not
happy. She had not the tranquil soul of her elder sister, nor that
curious mixture of sense and talent, and self-confidence and absence of
humour which made Helena what she was. She had not “given up,” as in
various ways both of them had done. She was dissatisfied, for life as
yet had lost none of its possibilities, neither by fulfilment nor
renunciation. All clouds might yet be cleared away from her sky, and
what she considered perfect happiness might yet be waiting for her
somewhere. This remnant of possibility that the soul may still have all
it craves, ought, you might think, to have kept Gussy’s heart alive, and
given her a secret support; but it was in fact a very fire of
restlessness within her. The first step towards attaining the secondary
happinesses of life, is to have given up and recognised as impossible
the primary and greater happiness. Gussy had been compelled to occupy
herself closely, in order to save herself from becoming discontented,
morbid, sour, and miserable, by reason of this sense within her, that
everything might yet come right.
“Why should you say it was injudicious?” she said to her sister, when
they at length discussed the subject, “why should not they help him,
since he wants it, because of the chance of meeting me? I heard what
mamma said as I came in. If he does meet me, I dare say he has forgotten
all about me by this time, or at least remembers me only as a friend.
It would be hard indeed if any ghost of me, after all these years, were
to come in his way.”
“And you,” said her sister, “could you meet him as a friend whom you
remembered? Would that be all?”
Gussy’s lip quivered in spite of herself. “I hope I could do--whatever
was necessary,” she said proudly. But in the midst of uttering these two
or three words, a sudden tear fell unexpectedly out of her eye and
betrayed her. “How silly!” she said, dashing it away; “you forget I did
see him. Oh, Ada, fancy travelling with him all those hours, and never
saying a word! It was as if we were in two different worlds--like
looking into another existence, and seeing those whom one has lost,
without any power to communicate with them.”
“Ah! but we are not permitted to do even that,” said Ada; “do you think
he did not recognise you? Not at all? That is so strange to me.”
Gussy shook her head. “I don’t think he did; but you must remember,” she
said humbly, “that he never was what you might call so very much in love
with me. He liked me; he was even fond of me--but not exactly in love.
It is different--I always felt that, even when you all made so sure. And
what he thinks of me now, I don’t know. If I saw him once, I should be
able to tell you; but I shall try not to see him. It is best I should
not see him,” said Gussy very low, “best in every way.”
“My poor child!” said Ada; but she did not contradict her, as her sister
almost hoped; and Gussy went away immediately after, with her heart
full, to put on her black cloak and close bonnet, and to go forth into
some very unsavoury region indeed, where a serene Sister, so smiling and
cheery that you might be certain her mind was taken up by no possible
happiness, was hard at work. Gussy had some very disagreeable work
allotted to her which gave her full occupation till it was time to
return to “the world,” and as long as she was thus engaged she was able
to forget all about herself and Edgar, and everything else in the other
existence. Thus Rag Fair was good for her, and gave her a certain amount
of strength with which to return to Berkeley Square.
But the reader will perceive that if Edgar’s mind was disturbed by what
he had heard, a similar, if less violent commotion had been raised, by
the mere intimation of his return, in the opposite camp, where every
member of the family instinctively felt the danger, though the young and
the romantic among them welcomed it as rather an advantage than a peril.
Gussy went about her ordinary work, whether in “the world” or out of it,
with a soft perpetual tremor, feeling that at any moment, round any
corner, she might meet him with whom her youthful thoughts had wandered
all these years. I will not say that she was not somewhat anxious and
uncertain as to the effect which this long interval might have had upon
Edgar’s mind; for women seldom have a very strong faith, unassisted by
evidence, in the fidelity of a long absent lover; but she had no sense
of having given love unsought, or shame in her own secret devotion. She
knew that if Edgar had remained rich and prosperous she would have been
his wife long ere now, and this gave to Gussy’s maiden love that sweet
legitimacy and pride of duty which is so much to a woman, and emboldens
her to give without shame, and with all her heart.
In the meantime, however, Lady Augusta took that other precautionary
measure which had suddenly occurred to her, to Ada’s great surprise and
consternation, and sent private orders to her son, Harry--who was at
that moment under a cloud, and doing his best to act the part of a good
son to a very irritable father who had just paid his debts for him, and
was taking them out in abuse of every description at Thornleigh, while
the mother and sisters were in town. I don’t believe she had the least
notion what good Harry could do; but it relieved him from a very trying
ordeal, and the young man jumped at it, though Ada shook her head. “He
will be on the spot at least, my dear,” said Lady Augusta, all
unconscious of slang. She explained to her husband that the Tottenhams
had taken one of their fancies to Mr. Earnshaw, whom they had all once
known so well as Edgar Arden, and that she thought it would be well that
one of the family should be there to keep an eye upon him, lest he and
Gussy should meet. “For you know, Gussy has not been the same since that
affair,” wrote the careful mother. Mr. Thornleigh, who had a more than
ordinary contempt at this moment for Harry’s capabilities, wrote her a
rather rude letter in reply, telling her that she was a fool indeed if
she trusted in anything her hopeful son could do; but nevertheless, he
made no objection to the visit. Thus it will be seen how emphatically
their own doing was all the confusion that followed this momentous step,
which the Thornleighs all combined in their ignorance to make Harry
take--and which he accepted as he would have accepted any change, at
that moment; not having the least idea of what was wanted of him, any
more than of what fate had in store for him. Lady Augusta went on more
calmly with her preparations for little Mary’s grand wedding when she
had thus, to her own satisfaction, secured a representative at
Tottenham’s. And Ada studied the patterns indefatigably, and gave the
mother the very best advice as to which was most suitable; and Gussy had
a perfect carnival of work, and spent almost all her time in Rag
Fair--with occasional expeditions to the shop, where Mr. Tottenham had
established a chapel, chiefly to please her, and where one of the
clergymen attached to the Charity-House kept up daily service. This was
much more dangerous, had Lady Augusta been aware of the fact, than the
rural Tottenham’s, where Harry was set to be sentinel without knowing
it.
And thus the first cold lingering days of spring--spring only in name,
with all winter’s cold, and less than winter’s comfort, dragged
themselves along. Only to Lady Augusta, who was busy with the
trousseau, and little Mary, who was making love, the days were not long
enough for all that had to be put into them; though the others were of a
different mind.
END OF VOL. I.