CHARIVARIA.

Mr. Redmond is said to have vigorously opposed the suggestion that

British troops should be sent to Durazzo on the ground that the present

is not a time when our home defences should be weakened.

***

The presence of some ladies on the Holyhead links disturbed Mr. Lloyd

George to such an extent, one day last week, that he foozled a shot, and

it is reported that the Government is at last contemplating serious

steps against the Suffragettes.

***

"Lord Strathcona's Seat for Sale."

_Daily Mail._

We would respectfully draw Mr. Masterman's attention to the above.

***

Europe's G.O.M., the Emperor Francis Joseph, is now so well that his

doctor's visits have been discontinued, but the statement that he went

for a long ride last week on a motor-bicycle is declared to be an

exaggeration.

***

According to _The Express_ there was some little unpleasantness in Paris

last week owing to the Chairman of the London County Council claiming

precedence over the Lord Mayor. It is thought that this could never have

happened had the Lord Mayor taken his coachman with him.

***

Corsica is now claiming that Columbus was born there, and not in Genoa,

and there is much evidence to prove that the claim is well-founded.

Still, it seems a little bit greedy of Corsica, which already has some

reputation as the birth-place of another distinguished man. It is

possible, however, that Genoa may give way if somebody will reimburse

her for the very heavy expense of her statue of Columbus.

***

Owing to a strike the demand for patent-leather boots for Ascot cannot

be met, and many visitors to this race meeting will have to spend the

day in comfort.

***

The announcement that the Mappin Terraces at the Zoo have now been

opened has, we hear, caused considerable discontent among the animals in

the old-fashioned dens and cages. They consider that these too ought to

be opened.

***

By the way these new quarters are proving so popular among the animals

that there is some talk of advertising them extensively in Central

Africa and other haunts of big game with a view to attracting new

tenants to the Regent's Park Garden City.

***

Regulations for the killing of flies have been issued to the troops at

Aldershot. Curiously enough, artillery is not to be employed. One would

have supposed that this sport might have afforded invaluable training

for bringing down hostile aeroplanes.

***

From a statement just issued we learn that Mr. A. Lock, of Edenbridge,

has slaughtered more than 18,000 queen wasps, and that for eighteen

successive years he has secured premier honours for wasp-killing at a

local horticultural show. Orders, we learn from an exceptionally

well-informed insect, have now been issued to the W. (Wasps) S.P.U. to

sting Mr. Lock on sight.

***

"A census," we read, "is to be taken of all the birds of the United

States by the American Board of Agriculture," but we are not told what

particulars will be asked for. Probably merely name and address, not

religion.

***

"Pygmalion for Threepence" attracted a large number of the working

classes to His Majesty's Theatre in spite of the price being higher than

"A Twopenny Damn."

***

Among the workers' organisations which booked seats was the London Glass

Blowers' Society. Hitherto, we understand, the favourite expression of

the members of this Society has been the innocuous "You be blowed," and

it is sincerely to be hoped that Mr. Shaw's play will not have given

these gentle souls a taste for anything stronger.

***

After holding up an elderly man in broad daylight in an arcade off

Ludgate Hill last week two highwaymen ran away and were captured in the

Old Bailey. It is thought that the homing instinct took them there.

* * * * *

Punch, or the London Charivari, June 10, 1914 · 第 5 / 38 题