"An engraved invitation," grinned Ned. "Here it is. I'll read it to you."
He read from a white card: "You are cordially invited to attend a
Thanksgiving dinner at the home of Queen Bess, ---- Street and Wabash
Avenue, at 3 o'clock. You may bring one gentleman friend."
"Why not go?" I asked.
"I'm a New Englander at heart," smiled Ned, "and Thanksgiving is a sort of
meaningful holiday. Particularly when you're alone in the great and wicked
city. I've inquired of some of the fellows about Queen Bess's dinner. It
seems that she gives one every Thanksgiving and that they're quite a
tradition or institution. I can't find out what sort they are, though. I
suspect some sort of an orgy on the order of the Black Mass."
At 2 o'clock we left our room and headed for the house of Queen Bess.
* * * * *
A huge and ornamental chamber known as the ballroom, or the parlor, had
been converted into a dining-room. Ned and I were early. Six or seven men
had arrived. They stood around ill at ease, looking at the flamboyant
paintings on the wall as if they were inspecting the Titian room of some
museum. Ned, who knew the town, pointed out two of the six as men of
means. One was manager of a store. One was a billiard champion in a
Michigan Avenue club.
Gradually the room filled up. A dozen more men arrived. Each was admitted
by invitation as we had been. Sally, the colored mammy of the house, took
charge and bade us be seated. Some twenty men took their places about the
long rectangular table. And then a pianist entered. I think it was Prof.
Schultz. He played the piano in the ballrooms of the district. He came in
in a brand-new frock coat and patent leather shoes and sat down at the
ivories. There was a pause and then the professor struck up, doloroso
pianissimo, the tune of "Home, Sweet Home."
As the first notes carrying the almost audible words, "Mid pleasures and
palaces" arose from the piano the folding doors at the end of the ballroom
parted and there appeared Queen Bess, followed by fifteen of the girls who
sold drinks for her. Queen Bess was dressed in black, her white hair
coiffured like a hospital superintendent's. Her girls were dressed in
simple afternoon frocks. Neither rouge nor beads were to be seen on them.
And as the professor played "Home, Sweet Home" Queen Bess marched her
companions solemnly down the length of the ballroom and seated them at the
table.
I remember that before the numerous servitors started functioning Queen
Bess made a speech. She stood up at the head of the table, her red face
beaming under her white hair and her black eyes commanding the attention
of the men and women before her.
"All of you know who I am, blankety blank," said Queen Bess, "and,
blankety blank, what a reputation I got. All of you know. But I've invited
you to this blankety blank dinner, hoping you will humor me for the
afternoon and pretend you forget. I would like to see you enjoy yourselves
at the banquet board, eat and drink what wine there is and laugh and be
thankful, but without pulling any blankety blank rough stuff. I would like
to see you enjoy yourselves as if you were in--in your own homes. Which I
take it none of you gentlemen have got, seeing you are sitting here at the
board of Queen Bess.
"Now, gentlemen," she concluded, "if it's asking too much of you to
forget, the fault is mine and not yours. And nobody will be penalized or
bawled out, blankety blank him, for being unable to forget. But if you can
forget, and if you can let us enjoy ourselves for an afternoon in a
blankety blank decent and God-fearing way--God love you."
And Queen Bess sat down. We ate and drank and laughed till seven o'clock
that evening. And I remember that not one of the twenty men present used a
profane word during this time; not one of them did or said anything that
wouldn't have passed muster in his own home, if he had one. And that no
one got drunk except Queen Bess. Yes, Queen Bess in her black dress got
very drunk and swore like a trooper and laughed like a crazy child. And
when the party was over Queen Bess stood at the door and we passed out,
shaking hands with her and giving her our thanks. She stood, steadying
herself against the door beam, and saying to each of us as she shook our
hands:
"God love you. God love you for bringing happiness to a blankety blank
blank like old Queen Bess."