I advise you also to cultivate sympathy of occupation. Sir James
Mackintosh, one of the most eminent and elegant men that ever lived,
while standing at the very height of his eminence, said to a great
company of scholars: "My wife made me." The wife ought to be the
advising partner in every firm. She ought to be interested in all the
losses and gains of shop and store. She ought to have a right--she has
a right--to know everything. If a man goes into a business transaction
that he dare not tell his wife of, you may depend that he is on the
way either to bankruptcy or moral ruin. There may be some things which
he does not wish to trouble his wife with; but if he dare not tell
her, he is on the road to discomfiture.
On the other hand, the husband ought to be sympathetic with the wife's
occupation. It is no easy thing to keep house. Many a woman that could
have endured martyrdom as well as Margaret, the Scotch girl, has
actually been worn out by house management. There are a thousand
martyrs of the kitchen. It is very annoying, after the vexations of
the day, around the stove or the table, or in the nursery or parlor,
to have your husband say: "You know nothing about trouble; you ought
to be in the store half an hour." Sympathy of occupation!
If the husband's work cover him with the soot of the furnace or the
odors of leather or soap factories, let not the wife be easily
disgusted at the begrimed hands or unsavory aroma. Your gains are one,
your interests are one, your losses are one; lay hold of the work of
life with both hands. Four hands to fight the battles; four eyes to
watch for the danger; four shoulders on which to carry the trials. It
is a very sad thing when the painter has a wife who does not like
pictures. It is a very sad thing for a pianist when she has a husband
who does not like music.