THE TENTH STORY_The Decameron of Giovanni Boccaccio

[Day the Second]

PAGANINO OF MONACO STEALETH AWAY THE WIFE OF MESSER

RICCIARDO DI CHINZICA, WHO, LEARNING WHERE SHE IS, GOETH

THITHER AND MAKING FRIENDS WITH PAGANINO, DEMANDETH HER

AGAIN OF HIM. THE LATTER CONCEDETH HER TO HIM, AN SHE WILL;

BUT SHE REFUSETH TO RETURN WITH HIM AND MESSER RICCIARDO

DYING, SHE BECOMETH THE WIFE OF PAGANINO

Each of the honourable company highly commended for goodly the story

told by their queen, especially Dioneo, with whom alone for that

present day it now rested to tell, and who, after many praises

bestowed upon the preceding tale, said, "Fair ladies, one part of the

queen's story hath caused me change counsel of telling you one that

was in my mind, and determine to tell you another,--and that is the

stupidity of Bernabo (albeit good betided him thereof) and of all

others who give themselves to believe that which he made a show of

believing and who, to wit, whilst going about the world, diverting

themselves now with this woman and now with that, imagine that the

ladies left at home abide with their hands in their girdles, as if we

knew not, we who are born and reared among the latter, unto what they

are fain. In telling you this story, I shall at once show you how

great is the folly of these folk and how greater yet is that of those

who, deeming themselves more potent than nature herself, think by dint

of sophistical inventions[140] to avail unto that which is beyond

their power and study to bring others to that which they themselves

are, whenas the complexion of those on whom they practise brooketh it

not.

[Footnote 140: Lit. fabulous demonstrations (_dimostrazioni

favolose_), casuistical arguments, founded upon premises of their own

invention.]

There was, then, in Pisa a judge, by name Messer Ricciardo di

Chinzica, more gifted with wit than with bodily strength, who,

thinking belike to satisfy a wife by the same means which served him

to despatch his studies and being very rich, sought with no little

diligence to have a fair and young lady to wife; whereas, had he but

known to counsel himself as he counselled others, he should have

shunned both the one and the other. The thing came to pass according

to his wish, for Messer Lotto Gualandi gave him to wife a daughter of

his, Bartolomea by name, one of the fairest and handsomest young

ladies of Pisa, albeit there be few there that are not very lizards to

look upon. The judge accordingly brought her home with the utmost pomp

and having held a magnificent wedding, made shift the first night to

hand her one venue for the consummation of the marriage, but came

within an ace of making a stalemate of it, whereafter, lean and dry

and scant of wind as he was, it behoved him on the morrow bring

himself back to life with malmsey and restorative confections and

other remedies. Thenceforward, being now a better judge of his own

powers than he was, he fell to teaching his wife a calendar fit for

children learning to read and belike made aforetime at Ravenna,[141]

for that, according to what he feigned to her, there was no day in the

year but was sacred not to one saint only, but to many, in reverence

of whom he showed by divers reasons that man and wife should abstain

from carnal conversation; and to these be added, to boot, fast days

and Emberdays and the vigils of the Apostles and of a thousand other

saints and Fridays and Saturdays and Lord's Day and all Lent and

certain seasons of the moon and store of other exceptions, conceiving

belike that it behoved to keep holiday with women in bed like as he

did bytimes whilst pleading in the courts of civil law. This fashion

(to the no small chagrin of the lady, whom he handled maybe once a

month, and hardly that) he followed a great while, still keeping

strait watch over her, lest peradventure some other should teach her

to know working-days, even as he had taught her holidays. Things

standing thus, it chanced that, the heat being great and Messer

Ricciardo having a mind to go a-pleasuring to a very fair country-seat

he had, near Monte Nero, and there abide some days to take the air, he

betook himself thither, carrying with him his fair lady. There

sojourning, to give her some diversion, he caused one day fish and

they went out to sea in two boats, he in one with the fishermen, and

she in another with other ladies. The sport luring them on, they

drifted some miles out to sea, well nigh without perceiving it, and

whilst they were intent upon their diversion, there came up of a

sudden a galliot belonging to Paganino da Mare, a famous corsair of

those days. The latter, espying the boats, made for them, nor could

they flee so fast but he overtook that in which were the women and

seeing therein the judge's fair lady, he carried her aboard the

galliot, in full sight of Messer Ricciardo, who was now come to land,

and made off without recking of aught else. When my lord judge, who

was so jealous that he misdoubted of the very air, saw this, it

booteth not to ask if he was chagrined; and in vain, both at Pisa and

otherwhere, did he complain of the villainy of the corsairs, for that

he knew not who had taken his wife from him nor whither he had carried

her. As for Paganino, finding her so fair, he deemed himself in luck

and having no wife, resolved to keep her for himself. Accordingly,

seeing her weeping sore, he studied to comfort her with soft words

till nightfall, when, his calendar having dropped from his girdle and

saints' days and holidays gone clean out of his head, he fell to

comforting her with deeds, himseeming that words had availed little by

day; and after such a fashion did he console her that, ere they came

to Monaco, the judge and his ordinances had altogether escaped her

mind and she began to lead the merriest of lives with Paganino. The

latter carried her to Monaco and there, over and above the

consolations with which he plied her night and day, he entreated her

honourably as his wife. After awhile it came to Messer Ricciardo's

ears where his wife was and he, being possessed with the most ardent

desire to have her again and bethinking himself that none other might

thoroughly suffice to do what was needful to that end, resolved to go

thither himself, determined to spend any quantity of money for her

ransom. Accordingly he set out by sea and coming to Monaco, there both

saw and was seen of the lady, who told it to Paganino that same

evening and acquainted him with her intent. Next morning Messer

Ricciardo, seeing Paganino, accosted him and quickly clapped up a

great familiarity and friendship with him, whilst the other feigned

not to know him and waited to see at what he aimed. Accordingly,

whenas it seemed to him time, Messer Ricciardo discovered to him, as

best and most civilly he knew, the occasion of his coming and prayed

him take what he pleased and restore him the lady. To which Paganino

made answer with a cheerful countenance, 'Sir, you are welcome, and to

answer you briefly, I say thus; it is true I have a young lady in my

house, if she be your wife or another's I know not, for that I know

you not nor indeed her, save in so much as she hath abidden awhile

with me. If you be, as you say, her husband, I will, since you seem to

me a civil gentleman, carry you to her and I am assured that she will

know you right well. If she say it is as you avouch and be willing to

go with you, you shall, for the sake of your civility, give me what

you yourself will to her ransom; but, an it be not so, you would do

ill to seek to take her from me, for that I am a young man and can

entertain a woman as well as another, and especially such an one as

she, who is the most pleasing I ever saw.' Quoth Messer Ricciardo,

'For certain she is my wife, an thou bring me where she is, thou shalt

soon see it; for she will incontinent throw herself on my neck;

wherefore I ask no better than that it be as thou proposest.' 'Then,'

said Paganino, 'let us be going.' Accordingly they betook themselves

to the corsair's house, where he brought the judge into a saloon of

his and let call the lady, who issued forth of a chamber, all dressed

and tired, and came whereas they were, but accosted Messer Ricciardo

no otherwise than as she would any other stranger who might have come

home with Paganino. The judge, who looked to have been received by her

with the utmost joy, marvelled sore at this and fell a-saying in

himself, 'Belike the chagrin and long grief I have suffered, since I

lost her, have so changed me that she knoweth me not.' Wherefore he

said to her, 'Wife, it hath cost me dear to carry thee a-fishing, for

that never was grief felt like that which I have suffered since I lost

thee, and now meseemeth thou knowest me not, so distantly dost thou

greet me. Seest thou not that I am thine own Messer Ricciardo, come

hither to pay that which this gentleman, in whose house we are, shall

require to thy ransom and to carry thee away? And he, of his favour,

restoreth thee to me for what I will.' The lady turned to him and

said, smiling somewhat, 'Speak you to me, sir? Look you mistake me

not, for, for my part, I mind me not ever to have seen you.' Quoth

Ricciardo, 'Look what thou sayest; consider me well; an thou wilt but

recollect thyself, thou wilt see that I am thine own Ricciardo di

Chinzica.' 'Sir,' answered the lady, 'you will pardon me; belike it is

not so seemly a thing as you imagine for me to look much on you.

Nevertheless I have seen enough of you to know that I never before set

eyes on you.' Ricciardo, concluding that she did this for fear of

Paganino and chose not to confess to knowing him in the latter's

presence, besought him of his favour that he might speak with her in a

room alone. Paganino replied that he would well, so but he would not

kiss her against her will, and bade the lady go with him into a

chamber and there hear what he had to say and answer him as it should

please her. Accordingly the lady and Messer Ricciardo went into a room

apart and as soon as they were seated, the latter began to say,

'Alack, heart of my body, sweet my soul and my hope, knowest thou not

thy Ricciardo, who loveth thee more than himself? How can this be? Am

I so changed? Prithee, fair mine eye, do but look on me a little.' The

lady began to laugh and without letting him say more, replied, 'You

may be assured that I am not so scatterbrained but that I know well

enough you are Messer Ricciardo di Chinzica, my husband; but, what

time I was with you, you showed that you knew me very ill, for that

you should have had the sense to see that I was young and lusty and

gamesome and should consequently have known that which behoveth unto

young ladies, over and above clothes and meat, albeit for

shamefastness they name it not; the which how you performed, you know.

If the study of the laws was more agreeable to you than your wife, you

should not have taken her, albeit it never appeared to me that you

were a judge; nay, you seemed to me rather a common crier of saints'

days and sacraments and fasts and vigils, so well you knew them. And I

tell you this, that, had you suffered the husbandmen who till your

lands keep as many holidays as you allowed him who had the tilling of

my poor little field, you would never have reaped the least grain of

corn. However, as God, having compassion on my youth, hath willed it,

I have happened on yonder man, with whom I abide in this chamber,

wherein it is unknown what manner of thing is a holiday (I speak of

those holidays which you, more assiduous in the service of God than in

that of the ladies, did so diligently celebrate) nor ever yet entered

in at this door Saturday nor Friday nor vigil nor Emberday nor Lent,

that is so long; nay, here swink we day and night and thump our wool;

and this very night after matinsong, I know right well how the thing

went, once he was up. Wherefore I mean to abide with him and work;

whilst I am young, and leave saints' days and jubilees and fasts for

my keeping when I am old; so get you gone about your business as

quickliest you may, good luck go with you, and keep as many holidays

as you please, without me.' Messer Ricciardo, hearing these words, was

distressed beyond endurance and said, whenas he saw she had made an

end of speaking. 'Alack, sweet my soul, what is this thou sayest? Hast

thou no regard for thy kinsfolk's honour and thine own? Wilt thou

rather abide here for this man's whore and in mortal sin than at Pisa

as my wife? He, when he is weary of thee, will turn thee away to thine

own exceeding reproach, whilst I will still hold thee dear and still

(e'en though I willed it not) thou shalt be mistress of my house. Wilt

thou for the sake of a lewd and disorderly appetite, forsake thine

honour and me, who love thee more than my life? For God's sake, dear

my hope, speak no more thus, but consent to come with me; henceforth,

since I know thy desire, I will enforce myself [to content it;]

wherefore, sweet my treasure, change counsel and come away with me,

who have never known weal since thou wast taken from me.' Whereto

answered the lady, 'I have no mind that any, now that it availeth not,

should be more tender of my honour than I myself; would my kinsfolk

had had regard thereto, whenas they gave me to you! But, as they had

then no care for my honour, I am under no present concern to be

careful of theirs; and if I am herein _mortar_[142] sin, I shall abide

though it be in pestle[142] sin. And let me tell you that here

meseemeth I am Paganino's wife, whereas at Pisa meseemed I was your

whore, seeing that there, by season of the moon and quadratures of

geometry, needs must be planets concur to couple betwixt you and me,

whereas here Paganino holdeth me all night in his arms and straineth

me and biteth me, and how he serveth me, let God tell you for me. You

say forsooth you will enforce yourself; to what? To do it in three

casts and cause it stand by dint of cudgelling? I warrant me you are

grown a doughty cavalier since I saw you last! Begone and enforce

yourself to live, for methinketh indeed you do but sojourn here below

upon sufferance, so peaked and scant o' wind you show to me. And yet

more I tell you, that, should he leave me (albeit meseemeth he is

nowise inclined thereto, so I choose to stay,) I purpose not therefor

ever to return to you, of whom squeeze you as I might, there were no

making a porringer of sauce; for that I abode with you once to my

grievous hurt and loss, wherefore in such a case I should seek my

vantage elsewhere. Nay, once again I tell you, here be neither saints'

days nor vigils; wherefore here I mean to abide; so get you gone in

God's name as quickliest you may, or I will cry out that you would

fain force me.' Messer Ricciardo, seeing himself in ill case and now

recognizing his folly in taking a young wife, whenas he was himself

forspent, went forth the chamber tristful and woebegone, and bespoke

Paganino with many words, that skilled not a jot. Ultimately, leaving

the lady, he returned to Pisa, without having accomplished aught, and

there for chagrin fell into such dotage that, as he went about Pisa,

to whoso greeted him or asked him of anywhat, he answered nought but

'The ill hole[143] will have no holidays;'[144] and there, no great

while after, he died. Paganino, hearing this and knowing the love the

lady bore himself, espoused her to his lawful wife and thereafter,

without ever observing saints' day or vigil or keeping Lent, they

wrought what while their legs would carry them and led a jolly life of

it. Wherefore, dear my ladies, meseemeth Bernabo, in his dispute with

Ambrogiuolo, rode the she-goat down the steep."[145]

[Footnote 141: According to one of the commentators of the Decameron,

there are as many churches at Ravenna as days in the year and each day

is there celebrated as that of some saint or other.]

[Footnote 142: A trifling jingle upon the similarity in sound of the

words _mortale_ (mortal), _mortaio_ (mortar), _pestello_ (pestle), and

_pestilente_ (pestilential). The same word-play occurs at least once