THE BLUE PETER
SEA COMEDIES
BY
MORLEY ROBERTS
AUTHOR OF "THE PROMOTION OF THE ADMIRAL"
"CAPTAIN BALAAM OF THE 'CORMORANT'" ETC.
LONDON
EVELEIGH NASH
1906
INSCRIBED AFFECTIONATELY
TO
MY FATHER
CONTENTS
I. THE EXTRA HANDS OF THE _NEMESIS_
II. THE STRANGE SITUATION OF CAPTAIN BROGGER
III. THE OVERCROWDED ICEBERG
IV. THE REMARKABLE CONVERSION OF THE REV. T. RUDDLE
V. THE CAPTAIN OF THE _ULLSWATER_
THE EXTRA HANDS OF THE _NEMESIS_
The steamship _Nemesis_, of two thousand five hundred and fifty tons
register, and belonging to the port of London, had nearly finished
her loading one foggy afternoon in a foggy November. She was at
Tilbury, taking in a general cargo for Capetown and Australian ports,
and as the last few cases were coming on board the skipper came on
board too by way of the big gangway, close by which the second mate
was standing.
"Is that the last of it?" asked the 'old man' gloomily.
"Yes, sir," said Mr. Cade with equal gloominess. When a man is
second mate at the age of fifty it is not surprising that he should
be sulky.
"And it is time it was, for we're well down to our mark, and no
mistake about it, sir."
Captain Jordan said nothing, but walked for'ard to his cabin and sat
down wearily. He threw a bundle of papers on his table, and filling
his pipe smoked for a few minutes. He was a fine handsome
white-headed man of some fifty-two years, and had once been
ambitious. Now he worked for Messrs. Gruddle, Shody, & Co., and, as
all seamen knew, to work for them was to have lost all chances that
following the sea affords even in these days.
"The swine," said old Jordan to himself, "oh, the swine that they
are! I wish I could get even with them. If I could do that I could
die happy. They are charitable, are they? Curse their charity! Ah,
if I hadn't been so unlucky in my last employ."
But that was it. He had been in the employ of a good firm with one
bitterly unjust regulation. Any skipper of theirs who lost a ship,
even through no fault of his own, had to go, and, though he had
worked for them for twenty years, that was his fate when he piled up
the _Grimshaw Hall_ on the Manacles.
"And that's how they got me cheap," said Jordan. "And because poor
Cade lost his master's certificate through an error of judgment they
have him cheap, and they have my old chum Thripp cheap in the same
way. Oh, they are a precious lot of swine, and I wish I had 'em here
with me when we are out at sea. I'd tell 'em what I think of 'em, if
I got the sack right off and had to ship before the mast."
Thripp the mate came by the cabin, and the skipper called to him.
"Yes, sir," said Thripp.
"Come in a moment," said Jordan. "I've something to tell you,
something that will cheer you up and make you like the firm better
than ever."
Thripp was also as grey as a badger, but not through age. He, too,
had been a master mariner, and had lost his first and only command by
running her against an iceberg in a fog. He had had orders to make a
passage at all costs, but those orders were verbal, and his owners
showed in court printed instructions that bade all their employees
use extra caution in time of fog, even if a slow passage were the
result. Therefore Messrs. Gruddle, Shody, & Co. got him cheap too.
"What's their charity now?" asked Thripp scornfully.
"It begins at home as usual," replied the skipper. "They have cut
you and me down thirty bob a month and Cade a quid."
Thripp sighed, and then swore.
"Well, we have both had our certificates suspended," said Jordan
bitterly, "so what can we expect? Men like us are every owner's
dogs, and they know it. I'm half a mind to quit."
"I've got a wife," said Thripp, "and I can't put the poor old girl in
the workhouse."
Jordan had never been married, and was glad of it now.
"I once had a chance to marry a lady with ships of her own," he said
thoughtfully, "and I was fool enough to prefer to run alone. But it
is wonderful how fond that woman was of me, Thripp. She proposed to
me three times."
"You don't say so," said Thripp.
"Fact, I assure you," replied Jordan. "She was as ugly as a freak,
and fat enough to make a livin' in a show, so I couldn't do it, you
see.
"I see," sighed Thripp, "but it was a pity."
"An awful pity," said the skipper. "And even now she ain't forgot
me, though it is ten years ago and more since we first met. Every
Christmas she sends me a puddin' and a bottle of rum that would make
your hair curl, ninety over proof at least, and with the aroma of a
West Injies sugar plantation. I wonder if she has any sort of a
notion how I've come down in life so as to be at the mercy of a Jew
like Gruddle."
Cade came along and reported that the very last of the cargo was in
and that the hatches were on. Jordan called him in and gave him a
tot of whisky, and broke the news to him that his wages had had
another cut. But the second mate said nothing at all. He shook his
head and went out.
"His spirit is broke," said Jordan gloomily.
"Oh, no," said Thripp, "it's only that he hasn't the words, poor
chap. Well, it ain't any wonder. I haven't any myself. But if I
ran across Gruddle my opinion is that I should find 'em in spite of
my bein' a married man."
"Last week they was talkin' of comin' along with us as far as Gib,"
said Jordan. "They are mighty proud of this steamer that I know they
got by fraud and diddlin' out of Johns and Mackie. Oh, they are very
proud of her, and they see money in her."
"If they had come," said Thripp savagely, "I should have said
something or bust."
"Better to bust, I suppose," replied the skipper, "though I own that
if I knew they was comin' with us I should be tempted to say a lot
that's now inside me boilin'. I wish they was, I own it. I own it
freely, even if I got the sack."
He relapsed on the ship's papers, and Thripp went out to attend to
the duties of a conscientious mate on the eve of going to sea. He
passed a telegraph boy on the main-deck and directed the lad to the
captain's cabin. Destiny in a uniform thanked him and whistled.
When he had found the skipper and old Jordan had read the message he
was the one who whistled. But he did not do so from want of thought
by any means. He looked as savage as a trapped weasel, and as black
as a nigger on a dark night.
"Well, I'm damned," said Jordan, "so they are goin' to do it after
all! And I don't know that I wish it now!"
He whistled again and rang the bell for the steward, who was another
of the firm's cheap bargains. He had been in prison, in company with
a former captain of his, for disposing of stores in foreign parts and
feeding the crew on something that the illicit purchaser threw into
the bargain. He was now trying to regain his lost reputation at the
wages of an ordinary seaman.
"Steward," said the skipper, "I want you to read this telegram and
arrange for it as best you can. They will be with us for six days or
thereabouts."
For the wire was from Mr. Gruddle, and it stated that the four
partners were going with them as far as Gibraltar.
"Shall we 'ave to get in anythin' special for them in the way of
provisions, sir?" asked the steward.
The 'old man' scratched his head and said that he thought so.
"As you know, Smith, what we have to eat is horrid bad," he said
thoughtfully.
"It is, sir," replied Smith. "It ain't fit for pigs."
Jordan stood thinking for a minute. Then he turned to Smith.
"On the whole, Smith, I think I'd get nothing. I'd like 'em to see
the kind of stuff they buy for us. Perhaps it will do them good. It
don't do us any. Get nothin', Smith."
"Very well, sir," said the steward with a grin. He turned to go, and
Jordan stopped him.
"I suppose, Smith, that some of the grub is worse than the rest?" he
asked.
"Lord bless you, sir, the men's grub is fair poison."
"Is it now?" said the skipper. "Do you know, Smith, I think we'll
eat what the men do for the passage as far as Gibraltar. I'll speak
to Mr. Thripp and Mr. Cade, and I daresay they won't mind just for a
little while."
"I could put you and them somethin' better in your cabin, sir, if the
other made you very sick," suggested Smith.
"So you could. To be sure you could," said Jordan. "That's a very
good idea of yours, Smith. But fix up their berths. They will be
aboard to-morrow mornin'."
He broke the news to the mates that the whole firm was coming on a
little trip with them, and when he asked them if they had any
objection to the fare that Smith proposed to give them for those few
days they said they would be glad to see it on the table. They
thought almost happily of the face that Gruddle would put on when he
saw the measly and forbidden pork. They had visions of Shody, who
was a wholesale grocer as well as a ship-owner, when he sampled the
stores that he supplied the firm with. They smiled to think of
Sloggett and Butterworth, the junior partners, who promised to be
quite as bad as their elders by and by, and were known to be fond of
high feeding. The only mistake they fell into about the whole body
of the firm was that they took them for fools who did not know what
sort of food they gave their officers and crews. For next morning at
nine o'clock a number of fascinating-looking cases were brought on
board, on which was the name of a well-known provision merchant. And
with the cases which obviously contained provisions there were some
which quite as obviously held champagne. The 'old man' and the two
mates looked at this consignment and their jaws dropped.
"Our scheme ain't worth a cent," said Jordan sadly.
"It might be worse, though," said Thripp; "we'll get some of this
lot, of course."
"Do you think so?" asked Jordan sadly.
"Of course I do," said Thripp indignantly. "Whatever kind of swabs
they are, they ain't surely so measly as to grub on this in our very
presence and see us eat the other muck?"
The skipper smiled a slow and bitter smile.
"Thripp, you are a good seaman, but as a judge of humanity you ain't
in it with Cade. All you and me will get of this lot will be the
smell of it."
An hour later the owners came on board, and were received with the
humility due to such great men, who owned ships and shops and had
houses in Croyden, and reputations which smelt in heaven like a
tallow refining factory. The very deck hands who brought their
luggage on board cursed them under their breath, and would have been
glad to do it openly. Then as the tide served the _Nemesis_ cast off
from the wharf and made her way out into the stream, and started on
her most memorable trip. If all the folks connected with the sea who
knew the character of the men who owned her had also known that they
were on board, and what was going to happen before they got back to
England again, she and they would have got a more lively send-off
than she did get.
The partners were in a very happy frame of mind, and showed it. They
had got hold of the _Nemesis_ cheap and were going to make money out
of her. They had their officers and crew on the cheap as well, and
it warmed their hearts to think of the price that they had
provisioned her at in these hard times. Everything on board the
_Nemesis_ was cheap except the grub they had sent on board for their
own use, and even that had been paid for by a creditor as a means of
getting the firm to renew a bill. It was quite certain the firm knew
their way about the dark alleys of this world. Gruddle had a
cent.-per-cent. grin on his oily face, and fat Shody smiled like a
hyena out on a holiday, and the two more gentlemanly-looking members
of the firm laughed jovially.
"It's a great idea this," said Sloggett. "We're going to 'ave an
ideal 'oliday and pay nothin' for it, and when we get to Gibraltar we
will put the screw on Garcia & Co. and show them that we are not to
be played with. Oh, this was a good idea of yours, Butterworth, and
I congratulate you on it."
They were shown their berths by the scared and obsequious steward,
and they changed their frock-coats and high hats, without which they
could not move a step, and put on more suitable garments. Gruddle,
for instance, put on patent leather shoes and spats, which with black
trousers and a loud check coat looked exceedingly striking. He wore
a Royal Yacht Squadron cap, which he had as much right to as a Field
Marshal's uniform. It suited his style of Oriental beauty as much as
that would have done, and he went on deck as pleased as Punch. He
felt every inch a sailor. The others followed him, and were almost
as remarkable to look at in their own way. Shody, who was a very fat
man, was in knickerbockers and shooting-boots, and wore a fur-lined
overcoat; while Sloggett was adorned, in a new yachtsman's rig-out
which made him look like a pallid shop-walker. Butterworth was the
only one who stuck to ordinary clothes, and, as a consequence, he
looked like a gentleman beside the others. It was an illusion, of
course, for he wasn't a gentleman by any means. On the contrary, he
was a member of the firm, and a rising man in that branch of the
shipping world which makes its money out of sinking ships.
"'Ow long will it be before we are in fine weather?" he asked, as he
stared at the docks and warehouses. But no one knew, and just then
there was no one to ask, for all the officers had their hands full.
The river was thick with traffic, and there was enough mist on the
water to make navigation a little risky.
"Oh, give me sunlight," said Gruddle. "When the sun shines I'm
almost as happy as when I turn a loss into a profit by attention to
details."
His partners laughed.
"There is nothing like an 'oliday on the cheap, with a free mind,"
said Shody. "I likes an 'oliday, I own, but when it costs me money I
ain't as 'appy as when it costs someone else money."
"There is one thing about this vessel that fills me with a just
pride," said Gruddle, "and that is that her wages bill per month is
prob'ly thirty-three and a third per cent. under that of any vessel
of hequal tonnage sailin' out of London this day. And it's done
without meanness too, all on account of my notion of givin' work to
the unfortunate at a trifle under current rates. This is the only
firm in London that can be charitable, and 'ave the name for it, and
make money out of it."
They said that was so, and they discussed the officers.
"All good men, if a trifle unfortunate," said Shody. "A year ago who
would 'ave believed that we could 'ave got a man like Jordan for what
we pay 'im? The very hidea would 'ave been laughed at. But he 'as
an accident that wasn't 'is fault, and down comes 'is price, and we
nip in and get a real good man cheap as dirt, and keep 'im off of the
streets so to speak. Oh, Gruddle, it was a great idea of yours; and
to give that poor unfort'nit steward a job when 'e came out of chokey
was real noble of you."
"So it was," said Gruddle, "but I was always soft-'earted if I didn't
lose money by it."
"So you were," said Shody warmly. "Do you remember 'ow you gave poor
Jenkins time to borrow money of his relatives w'en by all rights you
ought to 'ave given 'im into charge, and 'e would 'ave got ten years
as safe as a bill of Rothschild's?"
In such reminiscences of the firm's noble efforts on the part of
suffering and erring humanity they passed an agreeable hour, and then
went below and cracked a bottle of champagne. Soon afterwards it was
time for lunch, and Butterworth saw to the arrangements of their
special table, and got things out to be cooked. The skipper came
down for a moment while they were eating, and Gruddle called him over
to their table.
"Will you 'ave a glass of champagne, captain?" he asked.
"With pleasure, sir," said the white-headed old skipper, who looked
like a thoroughbred beside any one of them.
"Ah, I thought you would," said Gruddle warmly. "I reckon you 'ave
not tasted it since you wrecked the _Grimshaw 'All_ on the Manacles,
captain. And don't you forget that if you wrecks the _Nemesis_ you
won't taste much but skilly and water for the rest of your life.
Pour 'im out a glass, Sloggett, if you can spare it."
Jordan drank the wine, and it nearly choked him. When he got out of
their sight he spat on the deck, and went upon the bridge alongside
the pilot shivering. His hands were clenched and he was almost sick
with rage.
The mud-pilot saw that there was something wrong.
"Are you ill, captain?" he asked.
"I've 'ad a blow," said the old skipper, "I've 'ad a blow."
The pilot thought he had had bad news, and was sorry for him.
"No, not bad news," said poor old Jordan. "It ain't no news to me.
Somebody said somethin' that puts things in a new light to me."
He chewed the cud of unutterable bitterness and wished he was dead.
He did not go below again till they were well in the Channel, and he
ate no supper. He could not get it down. He sent for Thripp to his
cabin, and burst out on the mate with the intolerable insults that he
had had to put up with.
"We're their dogs," said Thripp bitterly; "but if I am married I'll
not put up with much, sir. They're half drunk by now, and are
playin' cards and drinkin' more, and Dixon is cryin' in his pantry
because one of 'em started bullyin' him about something, and said
that he was a hard bargain at any price."
"I wish I could get even, oh, I do wish it," said old Jordan. "Did
you ever hear of such mean dogs in all your life?"
"Only in books, sir," said the mate thoughtfully. "I recollect in
some book readin' about a man like Gruddle, but I forget what book it
was. But I do remember that someone knocked the man down that was as
bad as Gruddle. I enjoyed that book amazin'ly, sir."
"I wish you knew the name of it," said the skipper. "But if I 'ad as
much money laid by as would bring me in fifteen shillin's a week I'd
show you something better than anythin' you ever read in a book,
Thripp. You mark my words, I would."
"What would you show me, sir?" asked the mate eagerly.
But old Jordan sighed.
"What's the good of thinking of pure enjoyment when one ain't in the
least likely to get the chance of havin' it? We must put up with
'em, Thripp. After all it's only to Gibraltar, and after that we are
by ourselves. I hope I shan't explode before then."
And Thripp went away to talk to the engineer, and to try to remember
the name of the book in which someone got his deserts. While he was
doing that the partners played cards and drank more than was good for
them, and thoroughly enjoyed themselves. They told Thripp, when he
came below, that the whole ship was disgracefully dirty, and that if
he wanted to keep his job he had better see to it at once. As they
screwed him down on paint and all stores necessary to prevent a
vessel looking as bad as a house in Chancery, this naturally did not
cheer him up. Dixon was really in tears because Gruddle swore at him
in the most horrid way without any reason, except that he had sworn
at Shody and had got the worst of it. Cade accidentally ran into
Butterworth, who was sneaking round to see if he could find anything
to complain about, and Butterworth promptly said he was a clumsy
hound. According to Jordan, Cade's spirit was broken, but this was
more than he could stand even from one of the owners. He told
Butterworth to go where it was a deal hotter than the Red Sea in
July. He did not use any circumlocution about it either, and
Butterworth was in a fury. He complained to the skipper, and Jordan
had the greatest difficulty in refraining from endorsing Cade's hasty
recommendation of a suitable climate for the junior partner. But he
did refrain.
"I am very sorry that he should have so far forgotten himself," said
Jordan. "I will speak to him at once."
"The insolent fool must apologise," said Butterworth; and Jordan said
that Mr. Cade would undoubtedly see that that was his duty. He
called for Cade, and Cade's spirit seemed to have quite bucked up.
He flatly declined to apologise unless Mr. Butterworth first did so
for 'calling him out of his name.'
"He said I was a clumsy hound," said Cade.
"So you are," said Butterworth, "and I say it again."
"Do you hear that, Captain Jordan?" asked Cade. "Is an officer in
this vessel or in any other to be spoke to like that before the men?
Before I'll apologise I'll see that sailor-robber in hell, sir."
The poor skipper danced in his anxiety to preserve the peace.
"Mr. Cade, you mustn't. I order you to hold your tongue, sir. Go to
your cabin, sir, and after some reflection I am sure you will offer
an apology to Mr. Butterworth."
"I'll see him damned first," said Cade as he marched off.
"I sack you! I discharge you!" roared Butterworth, who was in a
blind fury.
"Discharge your grandmother," said Cade discourteously. "You can't
do it. I'm on the ship's papers. And who are you, anyhow?"
The owners held a consultation in the cabin when Butterworth came
below with his story of the second mate's insolence and
insubordination.
"Let us be clear as to 'ow it occurred," said Gruddle. "Now,
Butterworth, tell us what it was."
"He ran against me, and I remonstrated, and he told me to go to
hell," said the fuming Butterworth.
"That ith very bad, very 'ighly improper," said Gruddle. "But 'ow
did you remonstrate? Did you 'it 'im?"
"Certainly not," said the junior partner warmly, "all I said was that
he was clumsy."
Shody and Sloggett said that Cade must be sacked at once, or at least
as soon as they got to Gibraltar. Gruddle, who knew a deal more than
they did about most things in the way of the law and business, shook
his head.
"It will sound very queer to you," said Gruddle, "but the truth of
the matter ith that I don't think we can thack 'im. The man 'ath a
contract for the voyage, and the only one that can thack 'im ith the
captain."
The rest said this was absurd. Were they not the owners, and could
they not do as they pleased with every man-jack on board? And even
if Gruddle was right, they could tell the captain to dump Cade over
the side at Gibraltar.
"Well, of course we can do that," said Gruddle.
"And we will," said the outraged Butterworth. "I think we had better
'ave Jordan in now and tell 'im what to do."
They sent for the skipper, and the poor old chap came down and stood
up before them. With his big white beard and his ruddy handsome face
he looked like a captive Viking before a tribunal of tradesmen.
"This 'ere conduct of the second mate is what we've called you down
about," said Gruddle. "'E was very rude to Mr. Butterworth; told
'im, in fact, to go to 'ell, w'ich can't be put up with."
"And ain't goin' to be," said the offended partner. "We 'ave sacked
'im, and 'e must be sent ashore at Gibraltar and another one found."
Jordan had the very strongest inclination to tell Butterworth exactly
what Cade had told him. But he restrained himself, and suggested to
them that it would probably take some time to pick up a new second
mate at Gib, whereas they had arranged not to enter but to signal for
a boat for them to go ashore in. It was Shody who saw the way out
and brought them all to grief.
"Cade can come ashore with us," he said with a fat and happy smile,
"and you needn't wait to get another man in 'is place, captain. I
always understood that the second mate was on'y a kind of deputy for
the skipper, and I see no reason w'y 'e couldn't be done without
altogether."
"That's a very good idea of yours, Shody," said Sloggett and
Butterworth in the same breath, "and I daresay the captain will see
that it is."
But Jordan was breathless with indignation. Shody spoke for him.
"I always did think," said Shody, "that the captain of any vessel 'ad
much too easy a time of it. I don't see no reason why 'e shouldn't
stand his watch same as the mate. The captain's job is an easy one
and a well paid one. I should say it was an overpaid one. 'Avin' a
second mate is like 'avin' a fifth wheel to a coach, and the job
should be abolished. This is a good chance of inauguratin' an
entirely new system, and a reform that will save money."
The only one of them who thought this was going too far was Gruddle,
and he did not care to look Jordan in the face. When he did look at
the captain it was because he had to, and because Jordan demanded it.
The old man's face was livid with rage, and he struck the table a
resounding blow that made the glasses dance. The partners shrank
back from him as if he was a wild elephant, and Gruddle went as white
as the skipper's beard.
"You infernal hogs," said the skipper, "you infernal hogs, I'm sorry
I ever saw one of you! You are a disgrace to the name of Englishmen,
and--and I despise you!"
He looked as if he did; there was no mistake about that, and he also
looked as if he was about to assault the whole gang of them. The two
junior partners jumped to their feet not so much to be prepared to
defend themselves as to run away. Jordan might be somewhat past his
best, but he was still as strong as a bull and as big as any two of
them in spite of Shody's fat. He was distinctly dangerous.
"'Ow, 'ow dare you on our ship?" asked Shody with a poor attempt at
dignity. "Partners, our kindness 'as been throwed away, bestowed on
an hunworthy hobject."
"Shut up, or I'll make you," roared the old skipper. "I won't be
spoke to by a lot of hogs such as you, with your talk of charity and
your beastly manners. You can sack me if you like, but you don't
sack the second mate while I am captain of this vessel, so I tell
you."
"We--we discharge you," said Butterworth furiously. "We discharge
him, don't we?"
They said that they did, and for a second the skipper was about to
take his dismissal lying down. But the next moment he refused to do
anything of the sort. He saw the strength of his position where they
naturally only saw his weakness. He laughed a little angrily, but
still he laughed, and the sound outraged the firm.
"You will laugh on the wrong side of your face when you are on the
street," said Shody. And just then Jordan heard Cade enter his
cabin. He laughed again, this time much more naturally, and called
to the second mate. He came in looking as black as a thundercloud.
"Mr. Cade," said the skipper in almost his usual mild tone of voice.
"Yes, sir," replied Cade.
"Would you be so good, Mr. Cade, as to tell me who I am?"
Cade stared, and so did the partners.
"Who you are, sir?" stammered the second greaser in great amazement.
"Yes, who I am?" repeated the skipper.
"Why, you are Captain Jordan, sir," said Cade, still out of soundings.
"Of what ship, Mr. Cade?"
"Of this one, sir," replied Cade, who hoped that the skipper hadn't
gone mad.
"Exactly so, Mr. Cade," said the 'old man,' who had by this time made
up his mind to a very definite course of action. "You hear that,
gentlemen?"
They did hear it, but were not much wiser. They looked at each other
in some amazement.
"What do you mean, you old fool?" asked Sloggett. But Jordan did not
answer him. He spoke again to Cade.
"And if I am the skipper of this boat," he went on, "who are these
gentlemen who are givin' me directions to put you ashore at Gib?"
Cade eyed them malevolently, and for the first time a glimpse of the
captain's meaning came to him. His face lightened, and he smiled
grimly.
"Why, they are only passengers," he said.
"Right the very first time," said Jordan with a pleasant smile; "that
is what they are here, and no mistake about it. And as passengers,
Mr. Cade, what authority have they?"
"Not so much as the cook," said Cade.
The skipper, who had quite recovered his temper, turned to the
partners.
"You hear that, gentlemen?" he asked.
They did hear it, and it sounded very absurd to all of them but old
Gruddle, who did know something of the ways of the sea and the laws
of it.
"You are an old fool," said Butterworth, "and when we get to
Gibraltar you will find it out too, quick."
The skipper grinned quite amiably. As he had now made up his mind,
he reverted to the superiority of tone which had distinguished him
when he was captain of the _Grimshaw Hall_.
"Yes, I shall find it out--when I get to Gibraltar," said Jordan,
with ample and deadly courtesy, and saying that he went out of the
saloon and called Cade to follow him. When they came out on deck he
put his hand on the second mate's shoulder.
"I ain't goin' to Gibraltar at all, Mr. Cade," he said with a nod,
and Cade gasped.
"Ain't you, sir?" he asked after a long pause of astonishment.
"Not much, I'm not," said Jordan. "I've put up with a deal, but I'll
show 'em now who's the boss here. I got orders for Capetown and
Sydney, and if they choose to come on board as passengers and tell me
to go elsewhere I don't choose to do it, and that is all there is to
it. Damn their eyes!"
"Amen, sir," said Cade. "To think that Butterworth called me a
clumsy hound!"
"He did," said the skipper. "But I'll give you a chance of gettin'
even before you are a week older. You see if I don't."
And in the cabin the partners were staring at each other in great
surprise.
"This is mutiny," said Sloggett. But Gruddle growled.
"Don't be an ass, Sloggett," said the senior partner. "'Ow can a
captain be guilty of mutiny? The very idea is absurd."
So it was, of course.
"I don't believe he will go into Gibraltar at all," said Gruddle with
a gasp. "You chaps 'ave put the old chap's back up, and when 'e is
mad 'e's capable of anything."
"He wouldn't dare," said Butterworth. "Do you mean he will take us
on to Capetown?"
"That's what I do mean," sighed the wretched senior partner, who did
not find that he enjoyed the sea at all. "That is exactly wot I do
mean."
"Good Lord," said Shody, "and there ain't enough decent grub to do
more than take us to Gibraltar."
"This is a very 'orrid situation," said Gruddle, "and we owes it
entirely to you, Butterworth, for quarrellin' with the second mate.
I believe you done a lot more than call him clumsy. I'll lay odds
you was grossly insultin', as you always are."
The others turned on Butterworth and said that they believed it too,
and the unhappy Butterworth acknowledged that he had called Cade a
hound.
"I'm right as usual," said Gruddle; "and if I know my man no apology
will do any good. I can see that they are savage because we cut down
their wages. I've a good mind to raise 'em again till we get a
chance to cut 'em down safely. We was fools to come this 'ere trip,
and we owe it all to Butterworth who suggested it."
Butterworth got it all round, and was in an extreme state of
wretchedness.
"I think that if Butterworth is a gent, as we are all ready to
believe," said Shody, "that 'e will go at once and apologise to that
beast of a second mate; and we can tell the skipper that we will
raise 'is wages again--till we can sack 'im."
This seemed a very good idea to everyone but Butterworth.
"I never apologised to anyone, and I ain't goin' to begin with a man
like Cade," said Butterworth stubbornly.
"You're not a man of business in the least," said Shody. "I always
maintained that we lose more money by your manners, w'ich are those
of a pig, than we ever gain by your sharp practice. And now, 'avin'
got your partners into a 'orrid mess with a mad and insubordinate
captain, you are prepared to see them eat muck on'y fit for sea-goin'
folks. The on'y consolation is that you will 'ave to eat it
yourself."
"Oh, Butterworth, do apologise," said Gruddle with tears in his eyes,
"do apologise, for if you eat a little dirt in doin' so it is far
better than eatin' all you will if we continue this 'orrid and
disastrous trip."
The others agreed with Gruddle, and at last Butterworth was induced
to put his pride in his pocket and try an apology on Cade.
"It won't work, I know it won't work," said the cause of all their
woes. "That Cade 'as a down on me I know, and 'e isn't a gentleman
and won't take an apology from one. But all the same I'll try,
though I don't see why it should all be put on me. Men like these
officers of ours think a deal more of a few shillin's a week than a
few cross words, and it was Gruddle who cut down their wages. I
think it is Gruddle who should apologise."
But Gruddle argued that he had not called Cade a hound, and when
Butterworth went off on his painful errand he turned to the others
and said--
"The hidea of Butterworth thinkin' that 'e is a gentleman!"
They all shook their heads at the idea of Butterworth doing so, and
told each other stories of his origin in a pawnship in the Borough
Road.
"And 'e 'asn't manners either," sighed Shody.
By this time it was noon, and Cade was on the bridge, while Thripp
was in the skipper's cabin hearing a fuller account of the row than
Cade had given him. Cade was in no frame of mind to receive an
apology from anyone. He took things hard, and chewed over them
horribly.
"Hound, clumsy hound, am I?" said Cade as he paced the bridge with
his hands in his pockets. "I'd like to 'clumsy hound' him. Clumsy
hound, and I didn't knock him down! Bein' married makes a coward of
a man!"
He turned about to find the object of his wrath on the sacred bridge.
It made him quite forget that he was married, and that Mrs. Cade was
hard to deal with if the money was not forthcoming in due season. He
stared at Butterworth in the most offensive way, and the apology with
which the junior partner was primed stuck in his throat.
"What the devil do you want here?" asked Cade savagely. "Don't you
know that this part of the vessel is private? But perhaps you have
come to say that you are sorry for callin' me out of my name just
now, when I didn't knock you down as I should have done?"
It seemed peculiarly hard lines to Butterworth that his act of grace
was to be discounted in this way, and as he was not by any means as
big a coward as Gruddle or Shody he fired up at once.
"I was goin' to apologise, but now I won't, and I defy you to knock
me down, and you are a clumsy hound, so there!"
He put up his hands a moment too late, for Cade made a jump like a
buck and caught him full on the jaw, and the junior partner went down
like a sack of coals. He got up again more quickly than was wise,
and once more went down. This time he did not get up, though he was
invited to do so with great politeness by the second mate. For when
Cade had it all his own way, and had wiped out the sense of
self-contempt which had lately been troubling him, he grew quite
happy.
"Get up, dear, and let me knock you endways once more," he said in
the most agreeable tones at his command. "But I see you won't, my
chicken. You have had enough, and you may go now and send up your
partners one by one, and I'll serve the sailor-robbin' scum in the
same way. Get out of this, and next time don't forget that at the
first crooked word, though it is only rams'-horns, I'll knock you as
flat as a jib down-haul. This here bridge is private."
And Butterworth rose and staggered down to his partners with his hand
to his jaw.
"I'm much happier than I was, and if the old girl cuts up rough at my
gettin' the sack again, why all I have to say is that keelin'
Butterworth over is worth double the money," said Cade joyfully.
By this time the skipper had come to a decision which would have
pleased Cade even more than knocking the junior partner endways.
Thripp said that he did not care if the skipper did it. In fact, he
wanted him to do it, and did not care if it cost him his billet and
he had to ship before the stick in a wind-jammer for the rest of his
life. He also went on to say that it would be a joy to him always,
and that it would be an equal joy to all hands.
"Then that's decided on," said the 'old man' firmly. "We ain't goin'
into Gibraltar this trip, not by a hatful, and when their special
grub gives out we'll decide what is to follow."
"Yes, sir," said the mate, and he turned in to get a snooze before it
was his turn to go on watch again. Jordan walked into the saloon,
and was passing the partners like a ship in full sail passing some
mud-barges, when he was pulled up by Sloggett.
"Captain Jordan, Mr. Butterworth has been knocked down by the second
mate."
"Oh, has he?" asked Jordan.
"Yes, I have," roared the unfortunate man who had not got his apology
out in time to save himself. "Yes, I 'ave, and when we get to
Gibraltar I'll 'ave 'im in jail as sure as I'm one of the owners of
this vessel."
Jordan was perfectly reckless, and cared nothing by now for any of
them. He laughed, and walked on towards his cabin.
"Ain't you goin' to do nothin' about it?" asked Shody.
"Nothin'," said the skipper. "Serves the measly little swine right.
I hope Mr. Cade will serve the lot of you the same way before we get
to Capetown."
With that shot, which clean hulled them and made them quiver, he went
into his cabin and slammed the door upon them.
"There, there, what did I tell you?" wailed Gruddle. "'E's goin' to
take us on to Africa, and we can't stop 'im."
The prospect of being shut in a ship with officers who totally
refused to recognise that they had any status but passengers was very
dreadful, but over and above that there was the question of what
would become of the business, with none to attend to it but underpaid
clerks who were not allowed to know the dark and secret ways of their
employers. And then there was the question of the grub. Shody
fairly quailed at the prospect. They turned on poor smitten
Butterworth like one man, and if Cade needed any more revenge they
gave it him.
"You must go and speak to the skipper, Butterworth," they said in
chorus, "you must persuade him to act reasonable."
"Yes, and be knocked down again!" said the wretched junior, whose
head was aching as the result of Cade's hard fists. "'E's a much
more powerful man than that overbearin' beast on the bridge, and I
ain't goin' to be whippin' boy for any of you."
"But you got us to come," urged Gruddle.
"I wish to 'eavens I 'ad died before I thought of it," sighed
Butterworth. "But who would 'ave thought as men like them, under our
thumb so to speak, would 'ave taken things as they 'ave done. It
ain't my fault."
But they said it was, and at last Gruddle with a groan suggested that
they should raise the skipper's wages if he would be good and kind to
them, and not ruin them by taking them to Africa.
"For don't let us disguise it from ourselves, it will be ruin or very
near it. We'll get back and find ourselves in the Court, without any
of them bills provided for," said the senior partner. "Butterworth,
I don't believe you ever tried to apologise to the second mate at
all."
"He knocked me down as soon as I come on the bridge," screamed
Butterworth angrily.
"You should 'ave apologised to a man like that from a safe distance,"
said the wise and sad Gruddle. "You 'ad no business on the bridge,
and you know it. 'Owever, I insist that you go and speak polite to
the captain, who won't 'it you, I'm sure, while you are so swelled
from what the second mate 'as done."
It took quite a quarter of an hour's combined persuasion to make
Butterworth put his head into the lion's den, and he only did it on
the understanding that he was to be empowered to offer the skipper a
rise of three pounds a month and an indemnity for his insubordination.
"Very well," the others agreed, "you can say we forgives him for his
mutinous conduct, and won't take any steps in the matter if 'e lands
us at Gib as arranged. And of course our sayin' so means nothin',
and we can 'ave 'im sacked at Capetown by cable, and put on the
street."
Even then Butterworth was very uneasy, and demurred to going to
interview the ferocious Jordan without some kind of an excuse.
"'Adn't we better wait till 'e comes out to dinner?" urged
Butterworth, "and then our speakin' will come natural, or more
natural than now."
Sloggett looked up at this.
"Oh, if you are such a coward as to want an excuse I can give you
one," he said. "I quite forgot till this very moment that I brought
a letter from the office for this old scoundrel of a Jordan. So you
can take it in, Butterworth."
But the junior partner did not like being called a coward after his
encounter with the second mate, and he was very cross with Sloggett.
"Coward yourself," he said angrily. "Why don't you take it? I'll
bet you 'aven't the pluck to call that Cade a clumsy 'ound."
"No more 'ave you, now," said Sloggett; "and if you like I'll take on
your job with Jordan, and give 'im the letter myself."
"All right, you can," said Butterworth; "and I'll take five to three
in sovs. that you don't get an 'idin'."
That no one offered to lay these odds made Sloggett very
uncomfortable, but as he had undertaken the job he went through with
it, though he did it with a very pale face. He took the letter from
his pocket, without knowing that by so doing he was rendering their
trip to Capetown a dead certainty, and walked to the skipper's cabin.
He paused for a moment before he knocked, and the junior partner of
the unhappy firm laughed. That laugh gave Sloggett the necessary
stimulus to action, and he tapped very mildly at Jordan's cabin.
"Come in," roared the skipper, in a voice like a distant
thunderstorm, and Sloggett did as he was bid, and did it as mildly as
he had knocked.
"Oh, captain, I forgot to tell you that I brought you a letter from
the office which came just as I was leavin' it."
"Put it down then," said the skipper in anything but a conciliatory
tone. But Sloggett was not put off by that. He could not conceive
that anyone would not come off his perch at the sound of money.
"I want to talk to you about raisin' your screw, captain," he said,
with an obsequiousness which was very rare with him. "I want to talk
with you on the subject of raisin' your screw."
"I don't want to have any conversation with you or any of your
partners," said the skipper truculently; "and if you have any thing
to say on that or any other subject, you can say it when I come to
dinner."
"Oh, very well," said Sloggett. "I am sorry I have disturbed you,
but I forgot to tell you that I 'ad a letter for you, and that was
really why I came in."
"I told you to put it down, didn't I?" asked the skipper. "So do it
and get."
Sloggett withdrew like a dog with his tail between his legs, and went
back to his friends and reported that Jordan was mad and intractable.
And in the meantime the 'old man' took his letter and stared at it.
"By crumbs," said Jordan, "it's from the poor old girl that always
wanted to marry me! It is three years since she proposed last, and I
thought she had got tired of it. If she hasn't I'm blowed if I won't
think of doin' it after all."
He opened the letter eagerly, and when he had read it he sighed and
said--
"Poor old girl, well, well, well! Who would have thought it?"
He walked up and down his narrow cabin, and as he did so he shook his
head. Nevertheless there was quite another look in his face from any
he had worn since he had piled up the _Grimshaw Hall_. He stood
quite upright, and threw back his shoulders and took in a long breath.
"I'm devilish glad that I broke with this gang of robbers before I
knew," he said. "I feel like a man again. Poor old girl! I'm
almost sorry that I did not marry her after all. I'll tell this to
Thripp and Cade. They shall share in this or I'm a Dutchman of the
very worst kind."
He walked past the sad consulting partners, and looked more haughty
than ever, and yet more good-tempered.
"I'm very much afraid that he has 'ad good news in that letter," said
Gruddle, "for if 'e has it may make 'im more hindependent."
"I don't see 'ow 'e can be more independent than 'e 'as been,"
remarked Shody. "When a captain gets independent enough to call the
firm that owns 'im an infernal lot of 'ogs, that seems to me the very
'eight of independence."
But, as a matter of fact, Jordan was more independent. He went up to
Thripp, who was on the bridge, with a curious expression of mixed joy
and sadness.
"You remember that poor old girl that I told you of, Thripp?"
"The one that hankered to marry you?" asked Thripp.
"The same," said the skipper. "She has pegged out, the poor old
girl, at least she says she has."
Thripp stared.
"What do you mean by that, sir? How could she say so?" he asked.
The skipper showed him the letter that he had just received.
"Sloggett brought it on board, and gave it me just now as he came
crawlin' to my cabin and let on a lot of slush about raisin' my pay
agin' that they had just cut down, because they have tumbled to the
fact that I've a down on them and the likes of them, and mean to get
even by takin' them to Capetown. And she says in the letter that she
isn't long for this weary lonely world (those are her words, and they
make me feel as if I'd been ungrateful and ought to have overlooked
the fact that she wasn't pretty), and that when she has deceased the
letter is to go to me at once, and from that I draw the conclusion
that she has deceased and is no more, don't you see?"
"I see," said the mate. "But does she say anything else? She hasn't
left you a ship by any chance?"
"Not to say a ship," said Jordan, shaking his head, "but what's as
good. It appears that she naturally let on that she owned ships,
bein' a woman and a little inclined to brag, not havin' good looks to
fall back on, and it turns out that she was in the tug and lighter
line in Hartlepool, and, as I gather, doin' well enough, and makin'
money with three good tugs and a number of lighters and barges not
named, as well as a coal-yard with a well-established connection, and
she has left the whole shoot to me."
"I congratulate you," said Thripp. "Now you are really independent
and can go for Gruddle & Co. just as you like."
The skipper nodded.
"So I can, Thripp, so I can; but it is a great pleasure to me to
think that I told 'em the truth and called 'em hogs before I had had
this letter. Thripp, I feel more like a man than I have done since
the very painful day that I had my certificate suspended. Now I'll
go and tell Cade. He'll be glad to know it."
He turned to leave the bridge, when Thripp sighed.
"I suppose if you do take 'em on to Table Bay we shall all get the
dirty kick-out there, sir?" said Thripp in rather a melancholy tone
of voice.
The skipper laughed jovially.
"Of course we shall, Thripp, but think of the satisfaction of doin'
it! Oh, but I'm a happy man this hour! And if you can guess what I
mean to do in addition to takin' them where they by no manner of
means want to go, I'll stand you a bottle of their champagne, of
which I mean to have some or bust."
"It's all very well for you now, with your tugs and your lighters and
a coal-yard," grumbled Thripp, "but what about me and Cade, and our
wives?"
The 'old man' stared at his chief officer in the very greatest
surprise.
"Why, didn't I say that I wanted you and him to come into the
business with me, if you ain't too proud to be the skipper of a tug
and manage lighters and a coal-yard?"
"You never said a word about it," said Thripp with a pleased and
happy smile. "But if you mean that, I'm in with you, sir, and
anything you like to do with the firm shall have my heartiest
support, even if you go so far as to turn 'em for'ard to work."
Jordan looked at him with the intensest surprise.
"How in the name of all that is holy and righteous did you guess it?"
he asked with wide-opened eyes. "Thripp, my man, that is my
intention, and no mistake about it. But keep it dark, and I will
wake up Cade and make him joyful, a thing he very rarely is, for his
career havin' not been a success appears to weigh on his mind, and
his missis is a tartar, as I judge. Women worship success, and the
fact that the poor old girl that has left me these tugs knew that I
came to grief, and yet offered to marry me in spite of it, touched me
at the time as much as the tugs do now."
In five minutes there were three exceedingly happy officers on board
the _Nemesis_. Such a thing had not happened in one of Messrs.
Gruddle & Company's boats since there had been such a firm. But now
there were four very unhappy partners.
"I can't think why they are so happy," said Gruddle when the skipper
and the mate came down and began their dinner, "but I feel sure it
don't mean any good to us. I never was in such a position, and I
don't believe it ever happened before that the owners of a vessel was
in such a one. Oh, what shall we do if he won't go to Gib?"
At his instigation a bottle of champagne was sent over to the
captain's table.
"Don't you understand, Butterworth," said the senior partner, when
Butterworth objected, "that we are in a persition that is, I may say,
unparalleled? A captain has an awful lot of power, and I gather from
'is be'aviour that 'e knows it. In the office we gave 'im all proper
orders for Capetown, and said nothin' about Gibraltar, because you
hadn't been fool enough to suggest it then. If 'e won't go there we
can't make 'im, so if a little kindness and a bottle of champagne
will do it it is very cheap at the price."
"I would like to murder 'im," said Butterworth, but the champagne was
sent over to the skipper's table all the same. It was returned quite
courteously, or, at anyrate, without any demonstration of hostility,
and the partners knew then that war had been declared, and that peace
could be obtained at no price, do what they would. They put it all
down to the letter that Sloggett had given him, and they attacked
Sloggett, who in revenge drank far more wine than he could stand, and
went first for one of them and then for another, and finally got up
enough steam to swear at the captain. In one minute and fifteen
seconds by any good chronometer Mr. Sloggett was in irons, and in a
spare berth without anything to furnish it. Captain Jordan was
himself again, and not the kind of man to put up with anything from
anybody.