Hajji Baba does not shine in honesty--The life and adventures of the
mollah Nadân
I put on an air of consequence suited to the fine horse which I bestrode
as soon as I reached Seidabad (for that was the name of the village),
and rode through its gates with such a look of authority that the
peasants who saw me did not fail to make very low inclinations of the
head.
Where is Abdul Kerim? said I, as I dismounted, and gave my horse to
one of the bystanders.
In a moment every one was in motion to find him, and he very soon
appeared.
I am come, said I (after the usual salutations), on the part of the
chief priest, upon certain business well known to you; and straight I
delivered him my note.
Abdul Kerim had a piercing eye, which did not at all suit me,
particularly as he kept conning me over through a corner of it; but
I was relieved as soon as he had read the note to hear him say, _Be
cheshm!_ By my eyes! the money is ready. But you must refresh yourself.
In the name of God, come in.
I pretended great hurry, not at all liking to remain under the fire of
his sharp eyes; but by way of not exciting suspicion, I consented to eat
some fruit and sour milk.
I do not remember to have seen you at the chief priests, said he to
me, as I was opening wide my mouth to swallow a piece of melon; and yet
I am acquainted with every one of his servants perfectly.
No, said I, half choked at the question, no, I do not belong to
him. I am an attendant upon the chief executioner, with whom the mollah
bashi, I believe, has some money transactions.
This seemed to settle every difficulty which I saw had been rising in
the mind of my entertainer; and thus the fine horse, the gold-pommelled
saddle, and the brilliant bridle, were at once accounted for.
Having received the one hundred tomauns, I safely deposited them in my
breast; and then, apparently taking the road back to the city, I left
the village with a heart much lighter than I had brought. But as soon
as I was fairly out of sight I turned my horses bridle in the contrary
direction, and clapping the stirrups into his flanks galloped on without
stopping, until the foam fairly ran down his sides.
I determined to proceed direct to Kermanshah, there sell horse, saddle,
and bridle, and then make my way to Bagdad, where I should be safe from
all danger of molestation.
Having proceeded some five parasangs on my road I saw a strange figure
walking before me at a good pace, singing with all his throat. He was
lightly dressed, having only a skull-cap on his head, his face bound
round with a piece of linen, a pair of slippers on his feet, and nothing
to indicate that he was a wayfaring man. As I drew near I thought that
I had seen his form before; he was tall and well-shaped, with broad
shoulders, and a narrow waist. I should immediately have taken him for
the mollah Nadân but for his singing; for it never struck me as possible
that one of his grave character and manners could ever lower himself by
so ignoble an act. But little by little I saw so much of him, although
he had not yet discovered me, that I could not be mistaken; it was the
mollah himself.
I stopped my horse to deliberate whether I should notice or make
myself known to him. To pass him would be the height of cruelty, but
to recognize him would of necessity burden me with an inconvenient
companion. But then, should he discern who I was, and find that I had
shunned him, he would very probably denounce me as a thief on the very
first occasion; and if I escaped him now I should have the fear ever
after of knowing him to be my enemy.
We were both approaching a village where we must pass the night,
therefore there was no retreating on my part; for it was necessary to
see that proper care was taken of my horse, considering the long journey
it had to travel, and to push him on farther was impossible.
I took a middle line. Should he recognize me I would speak to him; if
not, I would pass him unheeded. I urged my horse on, and as I approached
he turned round and surveyed me from head to foot, but apparently
without making me out.
O Aga, for pitys sake, exclaimed he, have compassion on an
unfortunate man, who has no other refuge in this world than God and
you!
I could not resist such an appeal to my feelings, and, keeping silence
for some little while by way of hearing what more he would say, I at
length burst into an immoderate fit of laughter. My laughter seemed to
be as much out of season as his singing, for he was extremely puzzled
what to make of me: but when I began to speak, all doubts were removed,
and he ran up to me with a sort of joy and ecstasy that bordered upon
madness.
Ay, Hajji; my soul, my uncle, light of my eyes! said he, as he kissed
my knee. From what heaven have you dropped? What means this finery,
this horse, this gold, these trappings? Do you deal with the Gins and
the Dives or has fortune fallen in love, and adopted you its heir?
I continued laughing, so amused was I at these sallies, and he went on,
saying: How comes it that you have so soon turned your mule into this
fine horse? And my property, what is become of it? Have you not even
saved my ass, for I am sorely tired of going on foot? Tell me, tell me
all: by the beard of the Prophet, tell me all.
I soon found that had I refused to give him a full account of my
adventures, he would suspect me of having got possession of his
property, and turned it into the finery which had just drawn forth
his admiration; so I promised faithfully to relate everything, but I
entreated him at the same time to prepare a large quantity of credulity,
for what I had to say was so marvellous that he would very probably
conceive it was my intention to impose upon him.
We then proceeded to the village, where we took up our quarters at the
_mehman khaneh_, or strangers house, a convenience generally to be
found in every hamlet throughout Persia, and there established ourselves
for the night.
A person of my appearance could not long remain unnoticed, and I was
duly waited upon by the ked khoda, who supplied us with a good supper;
and during the time required for its preparation I related my adventures
to my companion. Their singularity was in no manner thrown away upon
him; and he seemed to die away with delight when he found that all my
present prosperity was at the cost of his old enemy the mollah bashi. As
we sat communicating to each other in the full confidence of our hearts
(for the miserable are ever greatly relieved by talking of themselves),
I discovered that never before had I acquired an insight into the real
character of my associate.
There must have been an assumed importance in you, said I to him,
as long as I was in your service; for how could one really proud be so
amiable as you appear now?
Ah, Hajji! said he, adversity is a great alterative. My life has been
one eternal up and down. I have often compared it to those whirligigs
set up by louts in our market-places on the No Rouz, which keep one
dangling between heaven and earth. Unfortunately, I am one of those who
has never adopted the maxim of spread not your carpet in a wet place.
Tell me, said I, the history of your adventures. We cannot better
pass our time, and I hope that you know me well enough now not to refuse
me your confidence.
You will hear nothing in my history but what is common to many
Persians, who one day are princes and the next beggars; but since you
are curious to know, I will relate it with pleasure; and he began in
the following words:--
I am a native of Hamadan. My father was a mollah of such eminence
that he was ambitious of becoming the mûshtehed of Persia; but his
controversies upon particular points of faith unfortunately carried him
so far that a party was created against him, which deprived him of the
elevation he sought. His most prominent quality was the hatred he bore
to the Osmanlies, and to Sûnis in general. One of our ancestors is said
to have first introduced into Persia a more universal hatred against
them than ever before existed, by a simple innovation in the education
of the Shiah children, by which means their very first ideas were
trained to be inimical to the race of Omar. I mean, said the mollah,
that which you no doubt very well remember: when a little boy in
schooltime is pressed upon certain occasions to ask his masters leave
to retire, the form of words in which he is enjoined to make his request
is _Lahnet beh Omar!_ curse be upon Omar! I dare say you have through
life, as I have, never omitted to unite the name of Omar with everything
that is unclean, and at least once a day to repeat the curse which you
were taught at school.
I fully assented to this, and then he proceeded with his story.
My fathers hatred for the sectaries of Omar extended itself to all
sorts of infidels. Jews, Christians, fire-worshippers, and worshippers
of images, all came within the scope of his execration; and what at
first he had practised from motives of ambition, at length became the
ruling principle of his nature. His family, and I among the number, were
brought up in his tenets, and imbibed all his violent prejudices; and so
much did we hang together by them that we formed as it were a distinct
sect,--the terror of infidels, and the most zealous upholders of the
Shiah faith.
After this you will not be surprised at the part I lately took in the
destruction of the Armenian wine-jars at Tehran. But that is not the
only scrape my zeal has led me into. Very early in life, when still a
student at Hamadan, I was involved in a terrible disturbance, of which I
was the principal promoter.
An ambassador from the Pasha of Bagdad, with his suite, was quietly
taking his road through our city, having sojourned there two or three
days on his way to the court of the Shah, when burning to put into
practice my fathers lessons, I collected a band of young fanatics like
myself, and, making them an appropriate address, I so excited their
passions that we resolved to perform some feat worthy of our principles.
We determined to attack our Turkish guests, inform them of the curses
we denounced against Omar, and invite them to become adherents to the
doctrine of Ali. Heedless, and, perhaps, ignorant of what is due to the
character of _elchi_, or ambassador, we only saw in Suleiman Effendi an
enemy to the Shiahs, and one calling himself a Sûni. One day, as he
was setting forth from his house to visit the governor of Hamadan, we
gathered ourselves into a body and greeted him by loud cries of Curses
be upon Omar! This enraged his domestics, who retorted the insult
by blows. Showers of stones ensued from our party, and this led to a
general fray, in which the Pashas representative had his turban knocked
from his head, his beard spit upon, and his clothes nearly torn from his
back.
Such an outrage of course could not be overlooked. The ambassador was
furious; he threatened to send off couriers to the Shah, and was even on
the point of returning to his own master when the governor, frightened
at the consequences if his wrath was not appeased, promised that
he should have all satisfaction, and that the ringleaders of the
disturbance should immediately be delivered up to him.
Trusting to my fathers consequence in the city, and full of vapouring
pride at what we had achieved, I at first made light of the vows of
vengeance which the Turks breathed against us; but the governor, who
only contemplated the loss of his place if the news of this event
reached Tehran; and caring little whether Ali was the true successor to
the Prophet, or whether Osman, Omar, and Abubekr were usurpers or
not, he at once ordered me to be seized, as well as two others of my
companions, and forthwith we were placed at the disposal of the enraged
Osmanlies.
I shall never forget the contending emotions of my mind when brought
face to face before these objects of my hatred. I did not at all relish
the sound beating which they had it in contemplation to inflict upon
me; and, at the same time, I groaned under the necessity of keeping to
myself that stream of abuse which was ready to flow against them upon
the smallest provocation.
They seemed, however, quite ready to return all our hatred with
interest, and did not lose this opportunity of letting us know its full
extent. They were not generous enough to let us off, but ordered the
administration of the bastinado with a degree of religious zest that
I thought could never have existed in any breast except my own. To be
short, our feet were beat into a jelly, and our only consolation during
the operation was the opportunity afforded us of giving vent to our
pent-up rage. The Turk, however, was revenged, and we were set free.
This adventure cooled my zeal for many years; although, in the pursuit
of the distinctions which my father sought, I continued to addict myself
to controversy. When about twenty-five years old, and my beard had
acquired a respectable consistency, I went to Ispahan in order to
improve myself by associating with our celebrated doctors, and to
make my own abilities known by the part which I might take in their
disputations. I succeeded to the utmost of my wishes, and acquired
considerable reputation. I only wanted an opportunity of distinguishing
myself, and that was soon afforded me by the following circumstance.
In the time of our famous Shah Seffi; who was himself half a heretic,
the Franks (a sect of the Christians) had considerable establishments
at Ispahan for the purposes of commerce, and were much patronized
and encouraged by him. He allowed them free exercise of their
religion,--permitted them to build churches, to import priests, and,
to the scandal of the true faith, even allowed them the use of bells to
call them to prayer. These Franks have a supreme head of their church--a
sort of caliph, whom they call _Papa_--part of whose duty, like that
of our own blessed Prophet, is to propagate his religion throughout
the world. Under different pretexts, convents of his dervishes were
established, some in Ispahan itself, and some in Julfa among the
Armenians. Most of these have been abandoned, and the buildings fallen
into decay; but one whose object more particularly was the propagation
of the Christian faith still existed, and to its destruction my
endeavours and those of some of our most zealous mollahs were directed,
notwithstanding the opposite views of the government, who are anxious to
encourage the Christians to settle in Persia, owing to the riches which
they introduce by their trade.
This convent was served by two dervishes, one of whom was in himself a
calamity!--one who understood the world,--a man of deep design,--and of
a wit so sharp that the shaitan in person was not fit to be his father.
He was tall, thin, and strong. His eyes were like live charcoal, and his
voice like a high wind. He never lost an opportunity of entering into
argument with our most learned men upon points of religion, and would
boldly assert, with the heart of a lion, that our holy Prophet, the
chief of created beings, the sealed intercessor, Mohammed Mustapha,
(upon whom be eternal blessings!) was a cheat and an impostor. In short,
he embarked in the sea of controversy, as if he had Noah for a pilot;
and, not content with words, he even wrote a book, in which he pretended
to prove the truth of his mad assertions. This book was unfortunately
attempted to be answered by one of our divines, who did not recollect
that it is folly to play with fire, unless there be plenty of water at
hand to extinguish it. His book said anything but what it ought, and
tended more to throw ridicule upon Islamism than to uphold its glory and
perfection. Ispahan was full of this subject when I arrived there; and,
being anxious to bring myself forwards, I proposed that an invitation
should be made to the Frank dervish to meet the mollahs of the city in
person, on an appointed day, in the Medresseh Jedeed, when they would
argue every point of their respective faiths, and when they would either
make the dervish turn Mohammedan, by producing conviction in his mind,
or they would become Christians, if his arguments prevailed. To this he
immediately assented; but we determined beforehand, amongst ourselves,
that such a thorn in the side of our _Ullemah_ should no longer exist in
Persia, and that the overwhelming truth of our belief should not be left
to the chances of vain words and uplifted voices, but show itself in the
zeal and numbers of its adherents. Accordingly every turbaned head,
and every beard that wagged, were secretly invited to appear on the
appointed day; and never was attendance more complete,--never did the
children of Islam make such a show of their irresistible force, as they
did on that memorable occasion.
The Medresseh was already filled; for, besides the mollahs, a great
crowd, all anxious to witness the triumph of the true faith, had taken
possession of the courts. Head over head and turban over turban were
piled upon each other, in thick array, along the walls and in the utmost
corners of the hall, when the Frank dervish, alone, unsupported, and
unfriended, appeared before us. He looked around in dismay, and appeared
appalled by our numbers. Two or three of the principal mollahs, who were
to carry on the controversy, were seated in front of their body, and I
was close at hand. We had prepared questions which were to be proposed
to him, and according to the answers he gave so were we to act. He
appeared to be provided with no other weapon of defence save his tongue;
and he sat down opposite to us, evidently much alarmed at the hostility
which he remarked on the countenances of all present.
Without giving him any time for reflection, we immediately began:--
Do you believe, said one, that the God in heaven put himself into a
human form? Do you, said another, acknowledge that God is composed
of three persons, and still is only one? Are you convinced, said a
third, that what you call the Holy Ghost came down from heaven in the
body of a dove?
These questions were put so quickly that he knew not which way to
turn, until, collecting within himself all the powers of his voice, he
exclaimed, If your intention is to kill me, be it so; but what good
will that do your argument? If your intention be to argue, attacking me
in this manner by numbers and personal violence will prove that you can
only oppose passion to argument; and show the world, that by me you have
been overcome.
Seeing that we were likely to fare ill, and observing that his words
were producing an effect in his favour, I was the first to exclaim
to the surrounding mob, and to the assembly present: O Mussulmans!
Mussulmans! come to our help,--our religion is attacked,--the infidel is
trying to subvert our faith,--vengeance! help!
These words produced an immediate effect, and a thousand voices were
lifted up against him. Seize him! said some; kill him! said others.
The mob was agitated to and fro, like the waves of the sea; when the
dervish, seeing himself in danger, made an attempt to escape, which was
seconded by one of the mollahs, whose compassion was moved towards him.
He threw his own cloak over the infidels shoulders, and just as violent
hands were about to be laid upon him, he pushed vigorously through the
crowd, and succeeded in reaching the house of an Armenian in safety.
We, the mollahs, being disappointed of our prey, proceeded in a body to
the house of the governor of the city, followed by an immense crowd of
the people. A great fermentation had been excited, and we promoted it
all in our power.
The governor himself was a strict and pious Mussulman, and we expected
that he would without hesitation join in the cry we had raised. We
accused the Frank dervish of preaching false doctrine, with a view to
subvert our religion.
This fellow, said we, calls our Prophet cheat; and talks
abomination. We demand that he be delivered over to us.
The governor was perplexed how to act; for he knew how dangerous it was
to interfere in matters in which the subjects of Europe were concerned;
and he was far from seconding our disposition to violence.
Why invite the dervish to an argument, said he, if you will not hear
what he has to say? If you have no arguments to oppose to his, violence
only makes your cause worse, and you do more harm than good to our
religion. But if on the other hand your arguments are better than
his, and he can bring no answer to them, then indeed he is a kafir, an
infidel; and according to our law is worthy of death.
Finding ourselves balked again, we departed breathing vengeance; and
I verily believe, had we met the dervish at that moment, he would have
been tom into a thousand pieces. He was so well aware of this, we soon
heard that he had left the city in secret; and so far our endeavours
were successful, for it was long before he ventured again to show
himself.
I had put myself so much forward on this occasion, and had shown my
zeal in so many different ways, that I had become a prominent character.
But hitherto I had got nothing by it. The capital I felt, after all,
was the place where I ought to endeavour to gain some permanent and
lucrative situation; and to that I turned my views. To gain this end,
I took myself to Kom, with a view of ingratiating myself with the
mûshtehed, whose recommendation I knew would do me more good than
ten years of prayer and fasting. I succeeded perfectly; for with
the character I had acquired of being the scourge of infidels, I was
received by him with great favour, and he was delighted to acknowledge
me for one of his most diligent disciples. I soon took up his cause
against the Sûfies with all the ardour that he could wish; and it was
not long before I ventured to solicit his recommendation to the body of
the Ullemah at Tehran, and to the principal men in office at court. He
professed to be sorry to part with me, but acceded to my request; and I
was soon after counted one of the holy fraternity at the seat of empire.
I confess to you, although I enjoy as good an opinion of myself as most
men, that I was much less successful in making my way at court than I
had expected. My competitors for advancement were numerous, and more
versed in the ways of the world than I. Like them, I was obliged to
begin by paying a most assiduous attention to men in office. Having once
gained the privilege of being seated in the _mejlis_ (assembly) of the
head of the law, who was in fact my chief, I little by little became
noticed by the grand vizier, the lord high treasurer, the secretary of
state, the chief executioner, and others. I was constantly to be seen
at their uprisings, and at their evening meetings; but after all, I
was nothing but a poor mollah, and I longed for some opportunity of
distinguishing myself from the common herd. The prime vizier first
noticed me owing to my once having succeeded in making him shed tears,
at the commemoration of the death of the blessed Hossein, which he held
at his house, and where I preached and chanted the service in a manner
that drew forth his approbation, and that of all the assembly. Since
then I have made great progress, particularly in the eyes of the people,
whose good opinion I look upon as the first of acquisitions to an
ambitious man.
But you have had an opportunity of judging how little their assistance
is to be depended upon, when opposed to the will of an absolute king.
Trusting too much to my influence over them, I have lost myself; and I
am now what you see, a miserable wanderer, returning to my native city,
as penniless as when I first left it.