THE HUMOURS OF THE SPA
And now began that famous month--it lasted very little more--when the
once godly town of Lynn was delivered over to the devil and all his
crew. We who are natives of the place speak of that time and the
misfortunes which followed with reluctance; we would fain forget that
it ever fell upon us. To begin with, the place was full of people.
They came from all the country round; not only did the gentlefolk
crowd into the town and the clergy from the cathedral towns and the
colleges, but there were also their servants, hulking footmen, pert
lady's maids, with the people who flock after them, creatures more
women than men; the hairdressers, barbers, milliners, dressmakers, and
the creatures who deal in things which a fashionable woman cannot do
without, those who provide the powder, patches, cosmetics, _eau de
Chypre_, and washes for the complexion, the teeth, the hands, and
the face; the jewellers and those who deal in gold and silver
ornaments; the sellers of lace, ribbons, gloves, fans, and embroidery
of all kinds. Our shops, humble enough to look upon from the outside,
became treasure houses when one entered; and I verily believe that the
ladies of the spa took greater pleasure in turning over the things
hidden away behind the shop windows, and not exposed to the vulgar
gaze, than in any of the entertainments offered them.
Every other house in Mercer Street and Chequer Row was converted into
a shop for the sale of finery; at the door of each stood the shopman
or the shopwoman, all civility and assurance, inviting an entrance.
"Madam," said one, "I have this day received by the London waggon a
consignment of silks which it would do you good only to see and to
feel. Enter, madam; the mere sight is better for the vapours than all
the waters of the pump room. Look at these silks before they are all
sold. John, the newly arrived silks for their ladyships," and so on,
all along the streets while the ladies walked slowly over the rough
paving stones, followed by their footmen with their long sticks, and
their insolent bearing. Indeed, I know not which more attracted the
curiosity of the countrywomen--the fine ladies or the fine footmen.
These gallant creatures, the footmen with their worsted epaulettes and
their brave liveries, did not venture into the streets by the
riverside--Pudding Lane, Common Stath Lane, or the like--the resort of
the sailors, where the reception of those who did venture was warmer
and less polite than they expected.
For the gentlemen there were the taverns; every house round the
market-place became a tavern, where an ordinary was held at twelve.
And the gentlemen sat drinking all the afternoon. Nay, they began in
the morning making breakfast of a pint of Canary with a pennyworth of
bread, a slice of cheese, and after the meal a penny roll of tobacco.
These were the gentlemen belonging to the country families. The
attractions of the spa to them were the tavern, the cockpit, the field
where they raced their horses, the badger baiting, and sport of all
these kinds that can be obtained in the spring and summer, when there
is no shooting of starlings in the reeds of marshland, and the decoy
of ducks, for which this country is famous.
Rooms had to be found for the servants; a profligate and deboshed crew
they were, of whose manners it may be said that they were insolent,
and of their morals, that they had none. Two or three of them,
however, getting a drubbing from our sailors, the rest went in some
terror.
It was as if the birds of the air had carried the news of this great
discovery north and south, east and west, so that not only was a great
multitude attracted to the place in search of health and pleasure, but
also another multitude of those who came to supply every kind of want,
real or imaginary. A thousand wants were invented, especially for the
ladies, so that whereas many of the damsels from quiet country houses
had been content with homespun, linsey woolsey, or, at best, with
sarcenet, a few ribbons for their straw hats, and thread for their
gloves, now found themselves unable to appear abroad except with heads
made up on wires and round rolls, their hair powdered and pinned to
large puff caps, with gowns of silk, flounced sleeves, and a laced
tippet. And when they went home they were no longer contented with the
things of their own making, the cordials of ginger, cherries, and so
forth, the distilled waters, the home-brewed ale, the small beer, the
wines made with raspberries, currants and blackberries. They murmured
after tea and coffee, the wine of Lisbon and Canary, the rosolio and
the ratafia, the macaroons, the chocolate, the perfumes, and the many
gauds of the dressing-table. And they scorned the honest red and brown
of cheek and hands that cared nothing for the sun, as if they would be
more beautiful in the eyes of their lovers by having cheeks of a pale
white with a smudge of paint, and hands as white as if just out of bed
and a long illness.
The way of the company was as follows:
They met at the pump room about ten; they called for the water; they
exchanged the latest scandal; they talked about dress; they bemoaned
their losses at cards; they then walked off to morning prayers,
chiefly at St. Nicholas's, where, as you have heard, Mr. Benjamin
Purdon read them with honeyed words and rolling voice. From the church
they repaired to a confectioner's called Jonathan's--I know not
why--where they all devoured a certain cake made expressly for them;
from the confectioner's some went to the draper, the milliner, or the
haberdasher; some to the long room, where there were generally public
breakfasts of tea, chocolate, and coffee; a few, but these were mostly
men, went to the bookseller's, where, for half-a-crown a month, they
could read all day long and what they pleased. The bookseller came
from Norwich, and when the season ended went back to Norwich. Dinner
was served at twelve or one. At five o'clock or thereabouts the
company began to arrive at the gardens and the long room, where, with
music, cards, conversation, and walking among the coloured lamps, the
evening was quickly spent. Twice a week there was an assembly for
dancing, when refreshments were provided at the cost of the gentlemen.
For the gentlemen there were also the coffee houses, of which two at
least sprang into existence. One laid down twopence on entering, and
could call for a dish of tea, a cup of coffee, or one of chocolate. In
one of them were found the clergy, the lawyers, and the justices of
the peace; they settled the affairs of the nation and decided the
characters of the ministers. In the other were those who affected to
be beaux and wits. Among the latter set one found Sam Semple, now a
person of great authority, as the secretary of Lord Fylingdale and the
author of a book of verse. He pretended to be an arbiter. "Sir," he
would say, "by your leave. The case is quite otherwise. The matter was
lately discussed at Will's. A certain distinguished poet, who shall be
nameless, whose opinion carries weight even in that august assemblage,
was of opinion that...." And so forth, with an air of profound wisdom.
As regards wit in conversation, it consists, I believe, in finding
different ways, all unexpected, of saying: "You are a fool. You are an
ass. You are a jackanapes. You are an ignorant clown. You are a
low-born upstart." This kind of wit was cultivated with some success
at first, but as it was not always relished by those to whom it was
directed, it led to the pulling of noses and the discharge of coffee
or tea in the face of the ingenious author of the unexpected epigram.
So that its practice languished and presently died out altogether.
The most astonishing change, however, was in the market-place. Here,
instead of one market day in the week, there was a market day all the
week long. The stalls were never removed; every day the country people
crowded into the town--some riding, some walking, some in boats, some
in barges, bringing poultry, ducks, eggs, butter, cream, milk, cheese,
honey, lettuce for sallet, and everything that a farm, a dairy, and a
stillroom can provide. Some sat on upturned baskets, their wares
spread out before them; some stood at stalls with white hangings to
keep off the sun; the fine ladies went about among them chaffering and
bargaining, their maids following with baskets. It was a pretty sight,
and to my mind the rustic damsels, for good looks, got the better of
the fine ladies and their maids. Many of the beaux and young bloods
were of the same opinion, apparently, for they, too, went round among
the stalls, with compliments not doubtful, and talk more free than
polite, chucking the girls under the chin and pinching their cheeks.
To be sure these freedoms do a body no harm, and I believe our Norfolk
girls can look after themselves as well as any.
And every day outside the stalls there assembled such a motley crowd
as had never before been seen in Lynn. It was a perpetual fair, at
which you could buy anything. Gipsies went about leading horses for
sale, the cheap Jack stood on the footboard of his cart and bawled his
wares; the rogue stood up, with voice and cheeks of brass, and offered
his caps, knives, scissors, cups and saucers, frying pans, saucepans,
kettles, every morning. His store could never be exhausted; he took a
quarter of what he asked; and he went on day after day. Nor must we
forget the travelling quack, the learned doctor in a huge wig and
black velvet; as like to Dr. Worship himself as one pea is like
another. He had his stage and his tumbling clown, who twisted himself
upon the tight-rope, turned somersaults, walked on his head, grinned
and made mouths and was as merry a rogue as his master was grave.
After the Tom Fool had collected a crowd and made them merry, the
doctor advanced, his face full of wisdom, and explained that he came
among them newly arrived from Persia, that land famous for its learned
physicians; that he was not an ordinary physician, seeking to make
money by his science; that, on the other hand, what he offered was
given, rather than sold, the charge made being barely sufficient to
pay for the costly ingredients used in the making of these sovereign
remedies. He had his pills and his draughts; his balsams and his
electuary; he had his plaster against rheumatism; his famous _Pulvis
Catharticus_ against fever; his _Carduus Benedictus_ against ague;
and, in a word, his infallible remedies against all the ills to which
flesh is liable. So he played his part, not every day, but often, for
the crowd in the market-place changed continually, and every change
brought him new patients.
Or there was the tooth drawer. You knew him by the string of teeth
which hung round his neck like a string of pearls over the neck of a
lady or a collar of SS. round the neck of the worshipful the mayor. He
pulled teeth at half a crown each, and if that was too much, at a
shilling. Not only did he bawl his calling among the crowd, but he
went through the streets from house to house asking if his services
were wanted.
The town crier added to the noise and the animation of the scene.
Almost every day he had something to bawl. He was known by his dress
and his bell. He wore a green coat with brass buttons; a broad laced
hat, he had a broad badge with the arms of the town upon his arm; in
one hand he carried a staff and in the other his big bell. And being
by nature endowed with a loud voice, and a good opinion of himself, he
magnified his office by ringing more loudly and longer than was
necessary, by repeating his "O yes! O yes! O yes!" at the end as well
as the beginning of his announcement, and by proclaiming this twice
over.
Towards the hour of noon, when every tavern had its ordinary, and the
sausages and black puddings were hissing in the cooks' stalls, there
arose a fragrance--call it an incense of gratitude--which pleasantly
engaged the senses. It was a hogo of frying fish, chops, steaks,
sausages, bacon, ham and onions; it included the smell of gosling and
duckling and chicken, roasted rabbit fricasseed; of roast pork, lamb,
mutton, and beef; of baked pies--all kinds of pies--custards, cheese
cakes, dumplings, hasty pudding. Then the feet of those who could
afford it turned to the tavern; those who could not pay the ordinary
at two shillings, or that at one shilling, dived into the cellar,
where they could dine for sixpence, or stood about the stalls where
they fried the sausages; those who brought their dinner with them sat
on their baskets and devoured their food, or bought of the street
criers who now went up and down ringing bells and crying:
Hot black puddings, hot,
Smoking hot,
Just come out of the pot.
or,
Here, dainty brave cheese cakes,
Come, buy 'em of me;
Two for twopence,
One for a penny;
Come along, customers, if you'll buy any.
It pleased me to recall the humours of the town at that time. Except
for the rows of booths, one would have thought it Stourbridge Fair at
Cambridge, which once I saw. The weather was fine and clear, the cold
east winds gone. There was so much money flying about that everybody
was buying as well as selling; in spite of all that was brought into
the town by the visitors, nothing was left when they went away,
because all had been spent. We thought that the harvest would last
forever. We looked to a season like that of Bath, which goes on all
the year round. If our people took more money in one day than they had
before taken in a whole month, they thought that it would go on day
after day, and they spent it all without restraint. Nay, the wives and
daughters of those who had kept humble shops and been content with fat
bacon and hot milk for breakfast, and more bacon for dinner; who had
been clad in homespun, now drank tea with bread and butter for
breakfast like the Lady Anastasia herself; dined off ducks and
goslings; drank fine ale and even Canary and Lisbon; and ventured to
attend the assembly where they stood up to the country dance in silk
like any gentlewoman.
I have mentioned the company of players; they acted three times a
week. We who work for our living are apt to despise these mummers and
their calling; to pretend every day to be some one else is not, we
think, an occupation worthy of a man, while the painting, the
disguise, the representation, either in dumb show or in words, of all
the passions in turn, must surely leave the actor no real passions of
his own. Yet I heard, while this company was with us, cases of such
generosity and Christian charity one towards the other when the money
ceased to come in, that I am constrained to allow them at least the
great Christian virtue of love for one another.
Besides the players, there were the singers and the musicians of the
spa; and there were jugglers, mountebanks, tumblers, tight-rope
dancers, ballad-singers, fortune-tellers, conjurers, pedlars and
hawkers of all kinds. The town of Lynn, formerly so quiet and retired,
with no other disturbance than that caused by a brawl among drunken
sailors, became suddenly transformed into the abode of all the devils
disengaged at the moment. There were sharpers busy at the races and
the cocking; men who laid bets, and if they lost, ran away, but loudly
demanded their money when they won; there was gambling; there was
drinking; there was fighting; the servants were as corrupt as their
masters; there were fresh scandals continually; a reputation lost
every day; there were duels fought over drunken quarrels, about women,
about bets and wagers; the clerks of the counting-houses were filled
with the new spirit of gambling; there were lotteries and raffles in
which everybody took tickets, even if they got the money for them
dishonestly. In a word, the pursuits of pleasure proved a mad race,
down a broad and flowery path, on each side of which were drinking
booths, and music, and dancing, while at the end there opened wide....
You shall speedily learn what this was.