TURNING OVER A NEW LEAF.
Charlie's heart felt a little lighter for the explanation. When the
tea-things were cleared away, and a nice little bright fire made up--for
it was a chilly evening--Mrs. Heedman sat down to her needlework, and
Charlie drew his chair close to his father's, waiting for him to speak.
Taking Charlie's hand in his, he began in a kind tone, "I want you to
tell me just how you felt while Tom Brown was persuading you, as you
call it, to go with him."
"Well," said Charlie, hesitatingly, "I felt I wanted to go very much,
and I thought I would only stay five minutes, there would still be
plenty of time to meet you; and something in my heart kept on
whispering, 'Don't go;' but I did go, you know," he went on, in a
saddened tone, "and then the little voice did not whisper again."
"Now," said his father, "you must think well, and tell me what sins your
sad way of thinking there's time enough has led you to be guilty of in
one short hour."
Charlie thought a moment, and then answered, without looking up,
"Disobedience and ingratitude."
"Yes," said his father; "but there is one more--presumption. You know
quite well, Charlie, that warning voice in your heart was placed there
by God to teach and guide you; yet you would not listen; you turned a
deaf ear; you knew better than the great God who made you; you put your
own will before His, and treated His Holy Spirit with contempt. It is a
most solemn and awful thought that God's Holy Spirit will not always
strive with us.
"What a terrible fate!" exclaimed Mrs. Heedman, "to be left entirely at
the mercy not only of the temptation of the world, but the sinful wishes
and inclinations of our own evil hearts!"
"Terrible indeed," said John Heedman. "Now listen here, Charlie: The
captain of a ship was warned by the pilot on board that the port that
they were making for was almost surrounded by rocks, sandbanks, and
other hidden dangers, and that it would be certain shipwreck, sooner or
later, for the captain, as a stranger, to attempt the direction of the
vessel without the advice and guidance of the pilot, who was aware of
every danger, knew exactly what was best to do, and could alone bring
them safely into the haven. What would you think, Charlie, if I were to
tell you that that captain, after being warned of his danger, refused to
allow the pilot to help him, turned his back upon him, would not listen
to his advice, treated him with contempt, and determined to take his own
way; taking the helm himself, and steering straight for the very rocks
he had been warned to avoid?"
"I should think he was mad," exclaimed Charlie.
"Not one bit more mad than those who risk the shipwreck of their souls
by refusing the help and advice of the Holy Spirit in passing through
this world, so full of danger and temptation."
"Oh, I see now, father; that is what my Sunday school teacher calls an
illustration."
"Yes," answered his father; "and now let us have a little talk about
'there's time enough.' I dare say you will be surprised when I tell you
it is really selfishness that makes you so fond of putting off."
"Oh, mother!" said Charlie, quickly, "I didn't think I was selfish. Do
you think I am?"
Mrs. Heedman could scarcely help smiling at his tone of injured
innocence. "I think I shall wait and hear what your father has to say
before I give an answer."
John Heedman went on: "You remember, Charlie, the French marigolds we
set, don't you?"
"Yes, I do remember indeed; it was so odd, mother, it was all the same
sort of seed, but when it grew up there was such a difference in the
form and shade of the flowers, we could scarcely find two alike."
"Well, then, you will understand me when I tell you that in the heart of
every one there is the seed of selfishness, which, as it grows, shows
itself in a different form in each person. In some it shows itself as
pride; in others as envy, greediness, jealousy, covetousness,
procrastination, indolence, and so on. Every sin, if we trace it, we
shall find that it springs from the seed selfishness--from love of self.
It is love of self that makes us forget to feel for others--careless,
disobliging; indeed, it would take me an hour to go through the list of
evils that spring from that same love of self. Learn these things, my
boy, when you're young. People seldom change their character and habits
after they get men and women. It is easier to bend this twig than that
tree in the road; and as you place it, so it will grow."
"What are we to do then, father?" asked Charlie.
"Ask God to help you to watch for it; and as it sprouts up, keep cutting
it down, trampling upon it, and rooting it up, as you would some noxious
weed that threatened to spread over your garden, smothering and stealing
away the nourishment from your flowers."
"What would you call the flowers of the heart, father?" Charlie asked,
with a smile.
"Faith, hope, charity, peace, love, gentleness, goodness," answered his
father, readily; "one can imagine all these flowers, and many more,
perhaps, that I have not mentioned, clustering round the fountain of
prayer, depending upon it for their life; and just as the crystal stream
of the fountain must ascend, before it can shower down its clouds of
glistening and refreshing spray upon the parched and thirsty flowers
round its brim, so prayer must go up to heaven before it can bring down
life and strength to the flowers of our hearts."
"I understand it all, father," said Charlie, for he loved to "work out"
illustrations, as he called it. He went on, "And if the fountain were
neglected, and ceased to flow, how soon the flowers would be scorched up
by the sun! they would droop, and wither, and die. And so will the
flowers of our hearts if we neglect prayer."
"That is very well said, Charlie; but we must take care not to be
satisfied with just _knowing_ all this. We must have 'deeds, not words.'
I hope to-day has been a lesson to you that good resolutions, made in
your own strength, are of no use. If the failure of to-day has not
humbled you, and shown you your own weakness, God's lesson has been
thrown away upon you. Let me see you make a fresh beginning; turn a new
leaf over, and set to work in earnest to overcome this darling fault of
yours, in the strength of the Lord--not in your own. It will not be all
plain walking along a smooth road; you may often fall, through want of
trust, or some failing of your own: but do not be discouraged; remember
'the greatest honour consists, not in never falling, but in rising
every time we fall.' You know how often we have watched the tide rising,
and how you wondered at first that it did not come rolling on without
any stoppage; but then we noticed that although each wave fell back a
little, it gathered strength to come on with redoubled energy much
further up the beach than it had reached before, often catching up some
lovely seaweed or shell in its backward course, to bring with it and
leave at our feet. Each time you fall, then, remember the waves, and
determine, with God's help, to rise again, and reach a higher mark in
your onward course than you had attained before, bringing with you
increased humility, trust, and love, to lay at your Saviour's feet."
"Thank you, dear father; I will try indeed," said Charlie.
"And now you had better learn your lessons; after then you can amuse
yourself as you like. I don't think we have any locks or anything to oil
or put to rights to-night," said his father, with a smile, "so you had
better have your new paint-box out, I think."
"Mrs. Brown wants you to look at a lock in her house to-morrow, Charlie;
it will neither lock nor unlock. And the bottle-jack has gone wrong; it
went off with such a noise when she was winding it up yesterday: she
wants you to see if you can do anything to it."
Charlie's face crimsoned with pleasure: his great delight was in locks,
clocks, engines--anything mechanical, in fact; but the only way in which
he could indulge his love for such things was in taking off, oiling,
putting to rights, and screwing on again all the locks in their own
house, or any of the neighbours that would let him. As he often
conquered refractory locks, he became quite of importance in "the Row,"
and was often sent for. He had an old timepiece that some one had given
him, and would spend hours in taking it to pieces and putting it
together again; but he could not prevail upon his mother to let him
touch "the clock."
The lessons were soon learned, and then Charlie got to his painting.
What a happy night he had, cutting out pictures from some illustrated
papers, colouring them, and chattering incessantly, unless he was
putting in any particular touches that he seemed to think required
profound silence and holding of the breath!
"There, mother!" he exclaimed, holding up in triumph a picture of a very
stylish lady that he had finished, "that's the way you should be dressed
if I had my way; isn't she a beauty?"
"She looks gay indeed, Charlie," said his mother, smiling; "but I'm
afraid that style of dress would not quite suit me. Let me see, what has
she on? A bright blue dress, a scarlet cloak"--"Like Mrs. Greenwell's,
you know, mother," interrupted Charlie, "and a blue bonnet with a green
feather on it."
"Wouldn't a blue feather or a black one have looked better?" said his
father, looking up from his newspaper; "blue and green are not
considered pretty together."
"Well, I don't know why they shouldn't, father." Charlie felt touched at
his taste being called into question. "The forget-me-nots, the
bluebells, and the blue hyacinths grow amongst green leaves and grass,
and I'm sure God would not have put them there if they didn't look
beautiful."
"You have conquered me there, Charlie," said his father, laughing;
"still I am not reconciled to the blue bonnet with the green feather."
When it was Charlie's bedtime, he gathered up all the cuttings of paper
and burned them, washed his paint-brushes, and put everything tidily
away into a drawer that his mother had given him to himself, so that he
might have no excuse for leaving things about. The contents of that
drawer were miscellaneous indeed. There lay his pet the old timepiece,
surrounded by bits of string, screws, old nails, a hammer, a
screw-driver, old tops, bits of coloured glass, odd pieces of tin,
brass, and wire, two or three apples, a pair of pincers, an old
padlock, curious pebbles, a dog's collar, packets of flower seeds, a
couple of door-knobs, two or three rusty keys, and many other treasures.
When the putting away was finished, he brought the Bible to his father
and quietly took his seat. They made it a rule to have prayers before
Charlie went to bed, that he might join them; and special mention was
always made of him, that he might realize that every little thing
connected with his spiritual life was of the same consequence to God as
if he was a grown-up person. To-night there was much to ask for
him--pardon for the past and help for the future; and Charlie's heart
was very full as he listened to the simple, earnest prayer that was sent
up on his behalf.
"Good-night, my boy," said his father as Charlie came round to him; "when
you are dressing in the morning, remember that you must also 'put on the
whole armour of God,' for you are going out to do battle, 'not with
flesh and blood, but with principalities and powers;' not with an enemy
that you can see, but with the spirit of darkness. 'Resist the devil,
and he will flee from you.' 'Draw nigh to God, and He will draw nigh to
you.'"